33. I’ll Always Be Yours
I’ll Always Be Yours
~ E LIZABETH~
My feet pound against the damp forest floor, the tangled underbrush clawing at my legs as I crash through the familiar paths.
The rain-soaked air clings to my skin, but the tears streaming down my face burn hotter than the cool drizzle. Ten acres of land, sprawling and vast, and somehow it doesn’t feel like enough space to contain the chaos inside me.
Why can’t I just be happy?
The memories, so carefully locked away for five years, burst free like a dam breaking. They crash over me in relentless waves—rough hands pinning me down, cruel laughter echoing in my ears, pain that seemed unending.
Always something. Always someone trying to fuck it up.
I stumble over a root, barely catching myself before I hit the ground. My chest heaves with ragged breaths as the memories blur with reality, but the pain remains crystal clear. My fingers dig into the bark of a nearby tree, the roughness grounding me for only a moment before despair takes over again.
“Elizabeth!” James’s voice cuts through the sound of my pounding heart and the distant rumble of thunder.
I freeze, my breath hitching.
He knows now.
He’ll think I’m dirty. Used. A slut, just like Marissa said.
The thought ignites fresh panic, and before I realize it, I’m running again. The sobs tear from my throat, each one heavier than the last as the sky darkens above me. The first drops of rain sting my skin, a prelude to the storm building in the heavens.
“Really?” I shout, tilting my head toward the churning clouds. “You want to be a paid actor in my suffering too?”
The sky’s response is immediate. The rain pours down in a sudden, unrelenting torrent, soaking me to the bone within seconds. My shoes sink into the forming puddles, and my curses spill in every language I know—Russian, English, and the few French profanities I picked up at Harvard.
A hand grips my arm, startling me, and I panic.
My vision blurs, and in an instant, I’m not in the forest anymore.
I’m back there—held down, trapped, powerless.
“No!” I scream, wrenching away from the touch.
“Fuck!” James’s voice snaps me back to the present, his hand immediately releasing me. “Elizabeth, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean?—”
The sight of him is enough to break me completely. His usually impeccable suit is already ruined, plastered to his body by the rain, but the worry in his eyes is what cuts through my panic.
“Go away!” I yell, gesturing wildly at him. “You hate getting wet, and your suit’s going to be ruined, and now you think I’m a slut, and?—”
“Shut up for two seconds,” he interrupts, his voice calm but firm.
The words hang in the air, cutting through my spiral. My chest heaves as I try to catch my breath, the rain mingling with the tears streaming down my face.
“I wanted it to be you,” I sob, the confession tumbling out before I can stop it. “You were supposed to be my first. We were going to have perfect GPAs, graduate with honors, have the perfect family, and...” My voice cracks, and I clutch at my soaked shirt. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry...”
James steps closer, his movements slow and deliberate. When his arms come around me, I flinch, but he doesn’t let go. He pulls me against his chest, the steady thud of his heart grounding me in a way I desperately need.
“Why do you think we can’t still have those things?” he asks softly, his lips close to my ear. “Why can’t we still graduate together, have children, build that perfect family? Just because some bastards thought they could take advantage of my girl?”
His voice is steady, but there’s a fiery edge to it that makes my breath catch.
“This isn’t your fault, Elizabeth,” he says, his arms tightening around me. “You are the victim here, not the culprit. And you are not—will never be—a slut.”
His words break something inside me, and I collapse against him, my hands clutching at his ruined suit jacket like a lifeline. The rain continues to pour, cold and unrelenting, but his warmth wraps around me like a shield.
“James...”
“I love you,” he says fiercely, his hands moving to cradle my face. Rain drips from his hair, mingling with the drops already trailing down my cheeks. “I’ve always loved you. And I’m sorry I didn’t fight harder to find you, but listen to me.”
He tips my head up, forcing me to meet his gaze. His eyes burn with determination, unyielding despite the storm raging around us.
“We’re going to get married,” he says, his voice unwavering. “We’re going to finish school exactly like we planned, walk across that Harvard stage together. We’re going to have beautiful babies—a boy and a girl, because I need a mini Eli but also a little James running around.”
Despite everything, a laugh bubbles up through my tears.
“This will never happen again,” he promises, pulling me close once more. “And when the time is right, I’ll get revenge for what they did to you. I swear it.”
I cling to him, my fingers trembling as they grip the soaked fabric of his jacket. His words wash over me, a balm for the wounds I’ve hidden for so long.
“You really don’t think less of me?” I whisper, my voice small and broken.
Think I’m some disgusting slut not deserving of a future…
“Elizabeth Abercrombie,” he says, his tone firm and steady, “I have never been more in awe of your strength. To survive that, to build yourself back up, to never let them take your fire...” His lips press against my wet hair, lingering there as though trying to pour every ounce of his love into that one gesture. “You’re the strongest woman I’ve ever known, and you’re the only one I’d ever say I’ll wholeheartedly love till the day I take my last breath.”
His words seep into the cracks of my shattered heart, the knot of shame loosening ever so slightly.
"You’re mine, Elizabeth. My Eli. My everything, and no one is going to ruin that. No one will take you away again, and no one will ever lay their dirty unworthy fingers on you again.”
The rain pours around us, the storm relentless, but for the first time in years, I feel something akin to hope.
It’ll be okay. Everything, despite feeling lost, broken, and ruined…will be okay.