Chapter 2
TWO
MICAH
Fuck.
Fuck.
I tried to calm my racing thoughts, and heartbeat, but Kaylee’s presence had unraveled my entire being.
I exhaled slowly and looked up at the ceiling, letting the harsh lights burn my eyes.
I’m really not the type to go speechless.
Yes, I liked to think carefully before I spoke, but I knew how to express myself. I was never at a loss for words.
Until now.
Until Kaylee had turned nineteen and developed a newfound assertiveness.
I ran a hand over my face roughly.
The assertiveness wasn’t newfound, not really. Kay always had a forceful personality. It was just… this was new. This wasn’t just her being assertive. This was something more.
I rubbed a hand over my jaw and nearly groaned out loud. She didn’t even have to do anything and she grabbed every ounce of my attention. When she put any effort into it, like right now, when she practically pressed her entire body against mine, she was so goddamn… It felt like… it felt so…
Fuck, I wished I had the words to describe how she made me feel, but Kaylee was the wordsmith, not me. The only way I could think to describe it was...
Tempting. That was it. That was the word.
I wished to hell and back that Kaylee wasn’t so tempting. I wished I didn’t feel the way I did. I wished she didn’t feel the way she did.
Because nothing good was going to come of all this. Absolutely nothing. In fact, the worst possible things were more likely to happen.
I inhaled deeply and squeezed my eyes shut.
I only had fifteen minutes to get a hold of myself. To calm my rapid heartbeat. To suppress the semi-hardness in my jeans.
This was the closest I’d been to Kaylee in months, and she’d been determined to turn it into a slim distance. It seemed my body had appreciated her efforts more than my head.
I opened my eyes slowly and exhaled.
Only to find Chris staring at me from across the hall.
“Hey man.” His wide, linebacker chest cast a shadow over me. “I just saw Kaylee run by. You two okay?”
If it had been anyone else, if it had been Finn or Zain, I wouldn’t have expected them to notice a thing was wrong. But this was Chris, our rhythm guitarist. His large frame might have made him seem like an intimidating meathead but he’d always been oddly observant.
“We’re good,” I said flatly. “Everything’s good.”
I’d always been bad at lying, but Chris didn’t call me out on it.
He was a good guy, wasn’t a shit-disturber like half the members of the band.
Before he joined us it sometimes seemed like Anya and I were the only sane ones of the bunch, and even then Anya was sometimes a toss-up when she was sleep-deprived and uncaffeinated.
“I was hoping to ask you about our work on the second album,” Chris said. “I know I haven’t really contributed much.”
“It’s all good,” I told him. “Not everyone’s a songwriter.”
“That’s the thing,” he said sheepishly. It was an odd sight to see, such a beefy guy hunching his shoulders as if afraid he was about to be scolded. “I’ve kind of been working on something.”
“Oh yeah?” I asked, interest piqued. I hadn’t known Chris cared much about writing songs.
He nodded. “Kaylee’s been helping me.”
I froze.
Kaylee. Helping Chris. With songwriting.
Kaylee helping Chris with one of the most important things we did together. The thing that had brought us closer to each other than anyone else in the band. The thing that had turned us from young bandmates to best friends.
A raging, jealous beast erupted in my chest.
“That’s nice of her,” I said, unable to keep my voice from sounding as icy as my heart felt.
Either Chris didn’t notice my flaring nostrils and clenched fists, or he was too tactful to make a comment.
“I just wanted to let you know,” Chris said calmly. “That we’ve been working on stuff, I mean.”
What did he mean? That he wanted to let me know they were working on stuff, so I could consider his input when planning the second album?
Or did he want to let me know, specifically, that he was working with Kaylee? He wouldn’t feel the need to do that, would he, unless…?
The beast inside me roared. If this asshole thought he could lay his hands on Kay…
“I actually think she’s getting a little sick of me,” Chris chuckled. “I’m pretty bad at the lyrics part. I’m too literal, apparently. She told me to get a thesaurus.”
“We all know how much Kay loves her metaphors.” The hot, jealous rage cooled somewhat, replaced by a pleasant warmth.
I’d always teased Kaylee about her lyrics, but the truth was, I loved them. She could take a simple word or phrase and, with a little twist, make someone feel the most intense emotions.
“Anyway, I was just hoping you might consider some of my stuff, if it’s any good,” Chris said, rubbing a hand across the back of his neck awkwardly.
“Let me know when you’ve got something you’re proud of and I’ll give it a listen,” I told him. “Bring your A-game, all right?”
Chris perked up and gave me a grin. “Always do.”
I found myself responding with a smile of my own, the jealousy fading away. I was being unreasonable, and Chris was too good-natured of a guy to stay mad at.
Besides, even if he did want to… Well, I had no right to interfere, did I?
“I’m glad I caught you before the show, to talk it out,” he said. “We haven’t been seeing you around as much.”
I winced, then quickly smoothed out my face. Had everyone noticed?
“Yeah, well, you know how busy I’ve been,” I said with a weak chuckle. “Lots of work on the production side and all that. Not a lot of time for socializing.”
I was clearly unconvincing because a concerned look crossed his face.
“Do you want me to get Anya to talk to Kaylee?” Chris asked. “Maybe ask her to back off a bit if she’s stressing you out?”
My mouth went dry.
“What do you mean?” I asked quickly. “Why would she be stressing me out?”
A contemplative expression shifted across his face.
“We’re going on soon,” Chris said. “Better get out there.” He turned to give me a look as he walked past. “I know Kaylee’s like a little sister to all of us,” he started. “But what you’ve got to realize is, she’s also an adult.”
The jealous beast threatened to explode from my chest and grab Chris by the throat.
Then he clapped me on the shoulder with a meaty palm. “Maybe it’s time to get over yourself and make a move,” he said.
He left me frozen and speechless again in the hallway as he walked away.