11. Miles
Our next two games are on the road, and we could use a couple of wins.
We drop the first to a tough San Antonio team.
Atlanta is up next.
They made some trades over the summer and came to play tonight.It starts out straightforward, but they home in on the fact we”re short a big man, which means more defenders hanging around the perimeter to block every shot I put up.
I think about what Brooke said, that I’m not reaching my potential.
It got under my skin—or maybe that was her default mode of operating and I was already buzzing.
The attraction between us didn’t surprise me, but what did was how strong it was. I’m good at not taking things too seriously, but I’ve found myself thinking of her more than a few times this week.
“Miles!” Clay’s glaring at me to keep my head in the game.
On the next play, the guy guarding me talks smack about my team.
The next time I get the ball, I”m out for blood.
It”s Clay’s and Rookie”s job to play in the paint, up close. I”m the sniper. I watch and wait and stalk my prey from the outside, cutting through the other players to punk them, to line up the perfect shot…
I make the next three baskets with his hand in my face.
Brooke: Nice game.
The text comes through when I’m in the locker room.
Miles: I’m impressed you watched.
Brooke: One quarter.
Miles: What would it take to make you watch all four?
Brooke: I’ve got better things to do than watch a bunch of sweaty dudes run up and down a court.
We’ve been texting back and forth since our little shopping trip.
Mostly stuff to do with the reunion, but I saw a pic of her on social wearing one of the dresses I bought her.
Miles: Dress is fire btw.
Brooke: Thanks. I wore it to this event of my mom’s. Something new is a good distraction from something broken.
Her words stuck with me on the plane, in shootaround the next day.
Is that what I do? Distract myself from what’s broken with something shiny and new?
I’m still thinking about it when my phone jumps in my hand.
Aliya.
She hasn’t texted since the party, and I’d figured she realized I wasn’t worth the hassle.
“I’ve decided how you can make it up to me,” she purrs when I answer. “Dinner from a private chef. Roses, at least six dozen, and?—”
“This isn’t working.”
Silence floods the line, as if we’re both surprised by what I’ve said. But now that I’ve started, I can’t stop.
“I’m sorry if I didn’t treat you the way I could have, but I was clear from the start. I’m not looking for a girlfriend. During the season I have to focus.” I frown. “And maybe I have too many issues with?—”
She hangs up before I can finish.
I”m still sitting in the ice bath when Jay and Clay come into the treatment room.
Jay grabs the tub next to mine, hissing as he sinks into it. “Figured you might be hooking up with someone after that game.”
“My fan club is very active tonight on social.”
“They leave a review of your performance?”
“I always get an A-plus.”
Clay half grunts, half laughs as he claims the massage table in the corner.
The team’s massage therapist appears a moment later to start working on his shoulders.
It’s not a lie. I have a fan club. They have T-shirts and host meetings. I send them signed Christmas cards and stop by on Miles Day in the summer.
”Why do you look like you took a charge and still can’t breathe?” Jay asks.
“You do,” Clay offers from the massage table.
“Yeah? You can tell that with your view of the carpet?” I toss because he’s face down.
Jay chuckles, the sounds ending with a tight exhale.
Never quite get used to the ice water.
The timer on my phone says I have another five minutes.
“I told this woman we’re done hanging out,” I say.
“Didn’t think you were that into anyone.”
“I wasn’t. She wanted something I can’t give her.”
“You’d be surprised what you can give when you find the right person.” Clay’s voice is muffled by the headrest.
We were stunned when he met Nova and decided someone mattered as much as basketball.
“We can’t all have your moody-broody thing sending out a signal to every girl in Colorado.”
“The fuck are you talking about?”
Jay and I exchange a look. “You were begging for someone to see past the tattoos.”
A grunt is our only response.
I chuckle. “I’m not looking for a person who completes me. I have a lot of friends.”
Jay shifts in his tub. “It’s different when you meet a woman who makes it so you never look at anyone else.”
“You talking about…”
I almost say, “Chloe,” but trail off. The massage therapist has heard a ton of shit, but it’s better not to be talking about relationships with other people in the Kodiaks organization around, even though neither of them was with the club when they dated.
The idea of another person who sees you and laughs at your jokes and makes you smile, someone to take care of and go on adventures with is attractive.
But I know what it”s like to lose people you thought were fixtures in your life.
This team is my family. They’re everything to me.
Clay’s propped up on his forearms, staring straight at me. “It’ll happen when you’re not looking. Most inconvenient fucking place. And her smile will light you up.”
Brooke’s face appears in my mind.
I agreed to be her fake date because I want her to know I have her back at that reunion. It’s easier to look Jay in the eye and say his sister’s going to be fine when I’m ensuring it myself.
And when she admitted to me about getting cut off by her family, I was incredulous on her behalf. I’ve had to live with the uncertainty of not knowing if you’d have enough, and I don’t want her to feel that way.
I want to show her I care.
About her, about something.
And yeah, maybe I like having an excuse to be close to her.
Which is not what I signed up for, or what she did. She wanted someone to play the attentive date for this sorority reunion. Not someone to glaze over in practice imagining whether it’s as much fun to argue with her naked as it is clothed.
I should be having her back in the daylight, not imagining all the things we could do in the dark.
“In the meantime, you have your pick of the many ladies lined up outside for you,” Jay tosses. “Lucky you.”
“Yeah. Lucky me.”
I dunk my head under the water. Maybe if I do it long enough, the cold will freeze my brain.