Chapter 22 Dreaux Davis #2
We still hadn’t made up since the blow-up a few months ago.
It might have been childish, but I still wasn’t over what they said.
I spent my whole life making sacrifices for them, and it hurt to know it meant nothing to them.
Doniese had been blowing my phone up trying to make amends, but there was nothing left for her to say.
The room grew quiet after Promise and Maleah left. There were so many things I wanted to say, but it was easier said than done.
“You need to let it go.”
My face twisted as I glanced at Peace.
“What did you say?”
“Whatever this issue is with your sisters, you need to let it go. I understand you were hurt by what they said, but this has gone on long enough. You’re the only person they have to depend on. Did you ever stop to think about how all of this affects them?”
I scoffed at the bullshit I was hearing. This was the exact reason I didn’t speak about my feelings.
“Let me make sure I understand you correctly. My sisters told me they don’t need me, and they never have, and you think I’m wrong for taking a step back and allowing them to take care of themselves?” I chuckled angrily, wishing I had left them room with Maleah and Promise.
“You’re the adult in all of this. Besides, I’m sure everyone was reacting out of raw emotions. They didn’t mean what they said.”
“You’re saying that, but neither one of them has apologized since it happened.
To be honest, I’m not even looking for an apology from them.
Dana and Dominique are both of legal age, and they can take care of themselves.
I’m not in the business of forcing myself on anyone who doesn’t need my help.
If they want to be grown, then I’m gonna let them do it. ”
“You sound selfish.”
“I don’t give a fuck about how you or anyone else feels. I’m tired of breaking my back to take care of mothafuckas when nobody gives a fuck about what I have going on. If you feel so bad for them, then you can take care of them.”
“They love you, and you know it?”
“Naw, I don’t know shit. The only people I know care about me are Justice, Truth, and my daughter.”
“Wow.”
My anger was rising, and I knew it was time for me to leave.
“I’m about to get out of here before I say some shit I can’t take back,” I replied. This conversation was going left, and I wasn’t in the mood to argue.
“Go ahead. Run away from your problems like you always do. I used to think you were a real hero, but I’m starting to see how wrong I was.
A real man would make things right with their family, instead of trying to punish them.
Your mother made some mistakes in her life, but we’re all human, Dreaux.
I would hate for her to die, and you never get the opportunity to make things right with her.
As someone who lost their mother, that kind of pain doesn’t go away. ”
“That bitch isn’t my mother,” I seethed, trying my hardest to control my anger.
“It’s okay to be upset with her, but it doesn’t change the facts. She’s still your mother.”
Her words triggered me in a way I hadn’t expected, and I lost it.
Before I could register what was going on, I punched a hole in the wall.
All of the anger I held inside of me came out as I destroyed everything around me.
I heard the sound of Peace screaming, but I didn’t care.
All I saw was Doneisha’s face, and it fueled me with rage.
“Aye, what the fuck is going on?” Truth yelled as he gripped me in a bear hug. I tried to break free, but he held on tighter. I could feel my emotions taking over, and it pissed me off even more.
“Calm down, son.”
I refused to let the tears in my eyes fall because I would never allow that woman to have that much power over me. I did my best to bury my feelings years ago, but it seemed like I couldn’t escape them.
Truth let me go, but he stayed close. His eyes were filled with concern because he hadn’t seen me this angry since my father passed away.
“Tell me what’s going on.”
“I’m sick of everybody telling me I need to forgive that bitch.
I can’t wait until that bitch dies so I can stop hearing the shit.
” Truth gave me a look, and I knew he understood what I was trying to say.
He glanced over at Peace, then back to me, and I could hear the question he hadn’t asked.
He wanted to know if she knew the truth.
I shook my head and stuffed my hands in my pockets.
“Maybe it’s time for you to tell them the truth. I actually have some news I need to give you anyway.”
I ignored the first part of his statement, but the second part caught my interest.
“What do you know?”
“You know I don’t get in the middle of your business, but if you’re going to move forward with this, then you need to tell them,” he urged. I shook my head because I had no desire to discuss my past with anyone. It wouldn’t change anything, and it certainly wouldn’t make me feel any better.
He greeted Peace before leaving the room. I stuffed my hands in my pockets, trying to figure out where to even start.
“You keep saying no one cares, but you don’t give us the opportunity. Tell me what the fuck is going on.”
“I think I liked you better when you were too afraid to speak your mind,” I replied, taking a seat on the bed as she sat down next to me.
“Well, that’s too damn bad. You told me to stop being a weak bitch, and I listened. Now, stop bullshitting me and tell me what’s going on.”
I took a deep breath, then told her everything.
When she started crying, I turned my head because I wasn’t trying to get into all the emotional shit.
It happened, and I was making the best of it.
My main issue was the adoption. I still couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that my parents lied to me.
I saw all of the pictures from when I was a kid, and no one could have convinced me Doniese wasn’t my mother.
She never treated me any differently, nor did she ever exclude me from anything.
After the incident at the hospital, I called Truth and ran down the story.
Of course, his ass knew about the situation.
A part of me wanted to be upset at him for not telling me, but I knew he wasn’t on no flaw shit.
He offered to help me track my birth mother down, but I had been so busy dealing with Belleza and her bullshit that it slipped my mind.
I hoped whatever news he had would bring some clarity.
“I know you probably don’t want to hear it, but I’m really sorry. I can’t even begin to understand how you’re feeling, but I’m here for whatever you need.” Peace held my hand in hers, and I couldn’t shake the feeling her touch gave me.
“I’m good. The only reason I snapped was that I’m tired of everyone telling me how to feel.
Doniese doesn’t deserve shit from me, including forgiveness.
I’m sure she hasn’t reached out to my sisters because she doesn’t care about anyone but herself.
I don’t know what changed after my pops died, but she hasn’t been the same since. It is what it is. Life’s gotta go on.”
“What about your birth mother? Have you thought about reaching out to her?”
“Yeah, I thought about it. Truth is helping me track her down. I’m still not sure if I want to talk to her, but I guess I’ll determine that once I get the information.”
“Well, I’m here if you need someone to come with you. I mean, it’s only right that I help you find your mother since you helped me find my family. I guess we’re both outside babies, huh? We can be bastard buddies or something.”
“Why the hell would you say some shit like that?” I don’t know why her statement made me laugh, but it was something I needed.
“What? I thought we were bonding. Was it too soon?”
The innocence in her eyes only made it funnier. Her facial expressions reminded me of Promise whenever she did something she thought she would get in trouble for.
“You are something else. This wasn’t something I expected us to be bonding over, but I can live with it as long as you don’t ever use the term bastard buddies again. I’m too hood for that cheesy ass shit.”
“I’ll work on a new name for us. In the meantime, are you okay?”
“I told you, I’m cool.”
“Well, you punching a hole in the wall doesn’t give off that impression,” she pressed.
“I’m under a lot of pressure right now, and I lost my cool for a moment.”
“You know you don’t have to wear your cape every day, right? It’s okay if you aren’t okay.” Peace turned my chin towards her, and I found myself getting lost in her eyes. Her beauty mesmerized me, and I had to catch myself from kissing her.
“If I don’t wear it, who else will?” I asked the question as a joke, but there was truth to it.
“I will. If you taught me nothing else, it’s that you’re supposed to show up for the people you care about. I might not be as good as you, but I think I’ve got what it takes.”
“You care about me?”
“I do. We might not always see eye to eye, but you’re important to me. I never want you to feel like our relationship is one-sided. You’re not only Promise’s father, but you’re also my friend. Well, when you aren’t pissing me off.”
Her eyes were still locked on me, and I could see the sincerity in them.
“You and this friend shit. I don’t know why you’re still on that because we were never friends.” I chuckled when her nose wrinkled and her eyebrows bunched together.
“Well, we damn sure weren’t lovers because you didn’t want me,” she joked. I could tell it stung because of the sarcasm.
“Is that what you think?”
We hadn’t talked in depth about our relationship since I ended things, so I never knew what she felt about the situation.
“We don’t need to discuss this. I promise, I’m not upset, and I completely understand.
We’re better as co-parents, and I’m grateful we’re able to come together for Promise.
” Peace was trying to deflect from the conversation, but I realized it was my fault.
I never took the time to explain anything to her, so from her perspective, it came off as rejection.
Even though I couldn’t tell her the full truth, I wasn’t about to allow her to think something that wasn’t true.
“My reason for putting a pause on our situation had nothing to do with me not wanting you.”
“You don’t have to explai—”
“Obviously, I do because you’ve got it all wrong.
I made the decision to fall back because I had unfinished business to take care of, and I didn’t want you and Promise to be caught in the middle of my shit.
If you thought for a second I didn’t want to be with you, then you need to put that out yo’ head because it’s not true. ”
“I wish you had done a better job communicating your feelings, but I guess it doesn’t matter now.”
“What makes you think that?” I asked.
“I’m in a relationship with Kavello and—”
“For now.” I interrupted.
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“You must be crazy if you thought you and ol’ boy were gonna last. The only reason that man is still around and ain’t on a shirt is because I still have some shit to clean up.
” I smirked when I saw the horrified look on her face.
Peace clearly didn’t know who her baby daddy was, but it was time for her to find out.
“You can’t go around making empty threats. Besides, you have no control over who I date. That decision is mine to make.”
“My threats are fully loaded, lil’ mama. And I never said it wasn’t your decision to make. I’m gonna give you a choice; there just won’t be any other contenders.” I shrugged as I retrieved my ringing phone.
I had been receiving calls from unknown numbers, and I believed they were from Belleza’s crazy ass. The sooner I dealt with her, the sooner I could be with my family.
“I gotta handle some business. Let me know when you and my baby leave. I promised to bring her some ice cream tonight.” I informed her.
“You are ridiculous. Let me know what you find out from Truth. I meant what I said about being there for you.” Peace opened her arms to hug me, and I pulled her into me.
I kissed the top of her head as I thought about everything going on in my life.
Belleza needed to be out of the picture once and for all, so I could focus on the family I created.
Peace thought I was joking when I said buddy’s time was up, but I meant every word.
Now that I saw the kind of life I could have with her and Promise, no one was gonna take it away from me.