Chapter 16
RYDER
I cut into the chicken to see if it’s done and then shove the last piece of cookie into my mouth.
After the long-ass day I’ve had, I could eat the entire bag, but I’ve limited myself to one, hoping Cole never notices.
Although I’m not sure I’ve seen him eat anything with sugar besides sports drinks, so maybe he won’t care.
I don’t know why he has cookies shoved in the back of his freezer, but those babies are like crack. Eating only one is a testament to my willpower.
I flip the chicken breast and stir my mac and cheese. While he showers, I’m making dinner. I was a little hard on him about being late.
I need to get a grip on my nerves and fast. Cole’s safety is my responsibility, and there’s no longer room for any distractions. These threats are hitting, and I have to be ready.
I saw his usual carefree tone vanish when I told him about the new note. It’s the first time I’ve seen him get uptight about these threats. Nerves are ok, but I really need him good and pissed—ready to fight and find out who this asshole is. We might finally be getting there.
I hear his door open, and he strolls down the hall, pulling a T-shirt over his head.
Cole has a swimmer’s body. His long, lean muscles and abs look like he isolates each one.
I have no doubt Mindy spends her nights fantasizing about them.
Her bedroom is probably lined with bare-chested pictures of my roomie.
“What’s so funny?”
“Huh?”
Shit.
“What’s that?” He stops on the other side of the island, pointing at my mouth. “Why are you smiling?”
“I’m not.” I press my lips together.
“Uh, yes, you are.” His mouth turns up, and I focus on my cooking tasks.
“Just remembering Mindy’s face when you told her “we” would see her at the event. I’m back to being a little concerned she might be your stalker. Or maybe you have two.” I widen my eyes, and he looks at me from underneath his dark eyelashes, his smile retreating.
“Jones, if Mindy is my manically-lusted stalker, then I’d feel a whole lot better than I do right now, but I think you need to let that theory go.”
I lift my chin, glancing toward the ceiling. “Do I?”
I’m happy the tension from earlier seems to have dissolved. If we’re going to survive this, only one of us can be mentally uptight, and I call dibs. Especially now that his friend will be joining our little cohabitation party for a few days.
I make a note to call Track and tell him about our guest. Final test or whatever, I did not sign up for this.
“What are you making?” He gestures toward the food.
“Chicken with whatever that green leaf and nut mess is you eat. I’m having mac and cheese.”
He laughs, but it’s not his real laugh, and I don’t like the toned-down version. “Mac and cheese? That’s what you’re eating?”
“Damn straight it is. I’ve had a day.”
His blue eyes meet mine, curiously inspecting me.
Crap. I didn’t mean to reveal that.
As if he knows I won’t be talking about it, he stands and fills a huge bowl with lettuce, a bunch of nuts, berries, and beans, adding the chicken last. I tuck myself into the corner of the couch and eat my boxed, cheesy goodness straight from the pan. Cole stretches out on the other end.
“So, your friend, Nick, will be going to the event with us?”
I’ve spent all day mentally preparing for everything that attending this event will entail. I’ve run through endless scenarios, knowing I need to be focused and alert. There will be a massive crowd, and Cole is a target. I have to be on my A-game. I can’t do that with my anxiety through the roof.
He sets his bowl on the table beside him. “Yeah. He plays for the New York Liberties. He’s one of the best defensive ends in the league.”
“And you met in college?”
Cole hasn’t said much about friends, and the idea of having a strange male sleeping upstairs is one more thing gnawing at my insides.
Kerry’s reminder that Cole is safe brings a small amount of comfort.
His tender tone and willingness to wake me if I have another dream only confirm that.
He told me not to apologize, but that’s difficult when every single time, it’s all I can do not to be consumed by fear and shame so great they might swallow me whole.
“We were teammates. At first, he was a hot head. It almost got him thrown off the team, but my brother-in-law helped him use that energy for good instead of destruction.”
I nod, fully understanding the power behind that kind of self-loathing or pain.
“He’s a good guy. He’s not had it easy.” Cole reaches for his water.
“Lyla’s coming over at some point to help me find a dress.”
His head rolls in my direction, but I avoid his gaze, keeping my attention on the screen. “My sister hates dresses. Something tells me you’re not a fan either.”
Not being a fan doesn’t even touch the surface.
“I’m not getting paid enough for this.”
“It won’t be so bad. I promise.”
I know he’s smiling.
I side-eye him. “Matthews, don’t make promises you can’t keep.”
“Oh, I intend to keep this one.”
Something about his tone causes a swirl low in my belly I can’t identify. The tops of my nerves feel like they’re being singed, but not in the terrible way I’m used to.
Cole’s attention returns to the game, his relaxed posture not doing anything to ease my own. While I pretend to watch, my brain tries to identify those feelings. They’re foreign and confusing.
I give it all a swift kick to the side. I don’t need one more thing messing with me right now. Work. My brain and body need to be in one hundred percent hunt mode so I can find this bastard and get back to my normal, moderately comfortable existence.