Chapter 32
COLE
I switch off the headlights and pull into the large driveway. It’s dark and way past late, but this is home for me.
I hit the button to turn off the truck.
Apparently, Tracker has major connections. After Jos piloted our private flight, he also had a rented truck waiting for us in the small parking lot of the tiny airport.
I twist to look at Ryder, who hasn’t said more than a few words since we left the apartment. “It’s not so funny when you’re on this side, is it?”
I try to tease, but she doesn’t crack. She’s wearing that stony, blank expression I’m beginning to understand slips into place when she’s either highly focused or unsure.
“Hey, they’re pretty cool. I promise. Come on. It’s late.” I push my door open and slide our suitcases out of the back, meeting her on the sidewalk that leads to the front door of the large, two-story brick house.
She stares up at it but follows me.
“Just watch your back around Teddy. He likes to pull pranks,” I warn her.
I punch the code in the keypad and open the front door to a dark, quiet house that will only remain this way for a few more hours.
A light flicks on, and Maggie comes around the corner into the living room, holding the baby.
“Hey, you.” She moves right into me, hugging me long and tight. I hug her back, realizing I’ve missed this place and these people more than I even knew.
“I’m so glad you’re here. I’ve missed you,” she whispers.
“Me, too.”
She releases me and hands over Quinn. “It’s about time you met your niece.”
I take her and hold her out, seeing how much she’s grown in only a few months.
“Hi.” Maggie moves to Ryder, who’s tucked herself behind me. “I’m Maggie, this nutball’s sister. I’m really glad you could come. He’s told me nothing. It’s been like prying a sharp object away from a toddler when it comes to you.”
She leans to hug Ryder, and Ryder hugs her back stiffly.
“Well, it’s late, and this little lady is done snacking, so I’ll let you guys get to bed. I have you set up in Hank’s room downstairs, but let me grab the towels for the bathroom.”
Shit.
I didn’t think about this. “Actually, Mags,” I whisper, but she’s halfway to the laundry room.
I rest the squirming baby against my chest and face Ryder.
“We’re sharing a room?” Ryder’s tone is completely flat.
“I’ll ask for sheets and sleep on the couch.”
Ryder’s gaze shifts to the large sectional and then to the door before proceeding around the room. “What if. . . ” She doesn’t finish her question, but she doesn’t have to.
“You tell me what you want. I’ll sleep up here, on the floor in the hallway or—”
“Here are towels. There should be soap and shampoo in the bathroom.” Maggie hands Ryder the towels and takes Quinn. “I’ll let you get to bed. The circus starts in a few hours.”
She hugs me again. “I’m so glad you’re here.” She stops before disappearing down the hallway. “Oh, Ryder. Watch out for Teddy. He likes to initiate new guests.”
The light flicks off, and I grab my suitcase, heading for the stairs.
“Cole.” I turn, and Ryder hasn’t moved. “What if I hurt him?”
Even in the dark, I can see the severe worry in her eyes.
“It’ll be ok. I’ll talk to him.” I hold out my hand, letting her decide.
She stares at it, evaluating her options, but eventually takes it.
“Come on. We’ll figure out where I’m sleeping, but let’s do it downstairs before we wake them up.”
In the basement, we drop our bags and turn on the light in Hank’s old room. Ryder stares at the queen bed in the middle of the far wall.
“The workout room is next door. I’ll sleep in there,” I offer.
“You’re going to sleep on a weight bench?”
I shrug. “I’ve slept on worse.”
Her head lolls to the side as she inhales and lets it out. “It’s fine. I’ll sleep on the floor, and you can have the bed.”
“You’re not sleeping on the floor.”
“I’ve slept on worse.” She throws my words back at me, but her eyes tell me it’s the truth.
I don’t want to think about where she might have slept.
“Look, you’re here for me, so I’ll take the floor.”
“Fine. You’re right.” She tucks the corner of her bottom lip between her teeth, surveying the room.
I wait for her to look at me. “Everything is ok.”
Her eyes move between mine, determining if she believes me.
“We’d better get some sleep, though. The only quiet time in this house is right now.”
We quickly take turns in the bathroom, and Ryder pulls the extra blankets from the closet, doubling them up for extra cushion on the floor. She tosses me a pillow, and we get settled—her in bed and me on the floor beside it.
She peers down at me over the side of the bed. “Does your entire family think we’re together?”
I slip my hands behind my head. “I haven’t told them anything about you. Maggie would drive herself and everyone else crazy worrying.”
That’s it. I have no other excuses. Maybe part of me liked the idea of people thinking I had someone who cared about me.
That private admission makes me feel like an asshole. “I’ll clear things up in the morning.”
Her eyes roam over my face, and then she reaches up and turns off the lamp. A dim nightlight flicks on in the corner. Ryder rustles in the sheets and punches the pillow to flatten it as she tries to get comfortable.
You ok, Jones?” I ask quietly.
She doesn’t answer, but I know she’s not sleeping.
“In the stillness that follows, I hear her release a breath.
“I’m going to stay right here. . .on the floor. Ok?”
After another second, I hear, “Ok.”
Someone is after me, and it’s Ryder’s job to make sure they don’t get too close. But here, I finally get to protect her, and that’s exactly what I’m going to do.
______
I hear a thump, and then something click with a scrape.
“Shit.”
I rub my eyes and sit up. Ryder stands on her closed suitcase, reaching for the top shelf in the closet.
“What are you doing?” I rub the sleep from my eyes.
Kids’ voices carry on in the distance, and sleeping is over for now.
She steps off her suitcase, pulling her baggy sweatpants above her hips. She looks tired and worn, as if she fought all night.
“I can’t leave my Sig lying around.”
She flips the bathroom light on, and I squint one eye at her. “Your what?”
She peeks her head out with her toothbrush in her mouth, twisting the cap back on the toothpaste. “My pistol.”
Oh, right. Her gun.
“Don’t worry. I have the magazine stashed separately,” she says around her spit. She disappears and returns. “But it’s not ideal.”
I lie back down on the cold, hard floor, smiling. Never did I think I’d hear those words.
My entire body hurts, from my head to my toes. It’s amusing, really. I make millions of dollars, and I’m sleeping on the hard ass floor, but I’d do it every night if that meant Ryder would be near.
I run a hand over my face.
I’m in deep shit.
“What’s wrong?”
I lift my hand. Ryder sits on the edge of the bed, pulling the cuffs of my sweatshirt over her hands. The sight dispels the chill of uncertainty lingering around me.
I stare at her, swimming in all the soft gray material.
She glances down. “Sorry. It’s freezing down here.”
“Just don’t get any blood on it,” I tease, wanting her to stay tucked inside my shirt as long as I can keep her there.
One corner of her mouth lifts. “That’s a tall order, but I’ll try.”
I laugh, stretching. “You ready to head upstairs?”
She tucks her hands between her legs. “Yeah, uh. . . I was thinking maybe it’s best if you don’t say anything about us not really being together. I don’t want it to be weird for you or make your family worry. This is your break, and you should enjoy it with them.”
“I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.”
She peeks at me from under her eyelashes. “Them thinking I’m your girlfriend or not isn’t likely to change that.”
“Are you sure? Because it’ll be fine if I tell them.” I’m just happy Ryder is here. I don’t care what my family thinks or knows.
She nods. “Yeah. I’m sure.”
I peel myself off the floor. “Ok, then. Fair warning they’re nosy as hell.”
She groans, flopping backward on the bed, and runs a hand over her face.
I use the bathroom and brush my teeth, and then Ryder and I make our way upstairs. I pause in the doorway of the kitchen, watching the absolute madness that is my family.
I feel Ryder’s hand slip into mine. It’s a little sweaty, but I grip it tight, not letting her second-guess it.
“Unca Co.” Aiden, Maggie and Shane’s toddler, claps his messy hands and then returns to smearing oatmeal all over his tray.
I pull Ryder into the kitchen with me. “Hey, guys.” I run a hand over Aiden’s head.
The entire room falls still. All eyes are on me, then Ryder, then me, then Ryder.
Shane is planted beside Aiden with my little sister, Liv, curled up on his lap, hiding. Maggie sits with a blanket covering her top half, nursing Quinn as a shit-eating grin spreads across her face.
“Yo, bruh,” Teddy says through a mouthful. “When did you get here?”
The clinking of spoons resumes, and the slurping picks up.
Garrett gives a little wave and adjusts his glasses, then shoves another spoonful of cereal into his mouth.
“Late last night, but guys, this is Ryder.” I tug her forward, putting her in front of me but not letting go of her hand. “These two jokers are Teddy and Garrett.” I point at my brothers. “This is Shane and Liv.”
Shane nods his hello as Liv peeks one eye out from his chest.
“And this little man is Aiden.”
Aiden holds out his arms, wanting me to pick him up, but he’s covered in oatmeal.
“Coffee is hot. Help yourself to anything edible. The rule is still ‘Your Mess, Your Problem,’” Maggie says, pulling Quinn out from under the blanket and placing her over her shoulder.
I grab two mugs and pour coffee. Ryder sticks close to Aiden, who grins as he shows her how he can squish oatmeal between his fingers.
Little chubby-cheeked flirt.
“Are you Cole’s girlfriend?” Liv asks, suddenly fully awake. “He’s never had a girlfriend before.”
Ryder’s gaze drifts to me as I stir my coffee.
Shane makes some sort of clearing his throat sound while Maggie sits there, letting Liv do her dirty work.
“You could say that.” I jump in, handing Ryder a mug. I smile at Liv. “She’s a girl, and she’s my friend.”
“No, like, is she your girl-friend?”
Of course, Liv wants clarification.
“You’re sleeping in the same room. Maggie says you can’t do that unless you really love someone.”
Maggie sucks in her cheeks to keep from laughing, and I glare at her.
“I have to sleep in the same room as Teddy, and I’m not sure I love him,” Garrett says, lifting his bowl to drink the milk.
He wins the Favorite Brother Award.
“For real, dude? You love me. Claire wouldn’t even be talking to you if it weren’t for me.” Teddy takes his bowl to the sink and rinses it.
I make a mental note to talk to him about not pranking Ryder.
Needing a diversion, I ignore his pasty oatmeal mess and grab Aiden from his seat.
Maggie stands, handing Quinn off to Shane. “I need a shower. I smell like spit-up. Then, we’re going to the store, so get dressed. All hands on deck today,” she orders, and the kids groan.
“What do you want for breakfast?” I ask Ryder.
Aiden reaches for her hair as I try to wipe his hands clean. I yank him away, and he laughs. He tries again, and I pull him back. His giggles fill the room, and I see it break through Ryder’s nerves.
She smiles, and I know it’s the real deal because I see the tiniest dimple just to the side of her nose. Something like sunlight bursts through my chest. The kind of joy I’ve forgotten, or maybe I didn’t even know existed, and I can’t look away.
Garrett squeezes around us to rinse his dishes while Shane barters with Liv about getting dressed.
“What are you staring at?” Ryder’s gaze remains on Aiden, but she’s questioning me.
I grin. “I’m not staring.” I’m a shit liar.
She knows it, and I don’t care.
She tugs the sleeves of my sweatshirt over her hands. “Yes, you are. Stop it,” she orders quietly.
“How about eggs?” I ask while Aiden catches his breath.
She nods. “I can make them.”
“You?” I tease.
She rolls her eyes. “Fine. You make them.” She holds out her arms, and Aiden leans toward her.
I grab a pan and eggs from the refrigerator while Ryder sits at the table with Aiden on her lap. Liv climbs off Shane and across chairs to sit next to her.
“Do you want to see my Barbies? I have lots of them, but Aiden can’t play with them because some of the pieces are too small and he could choke. They’re in my room.”
I crack an egg and glance at Ryder. Her eyes meet mine for only a second as Liv begins to name and describe every Barbie she has in great detail.
“It’s good to have you home, man,” Shane says, patting me on the shoulder as he passes.
It’s really good to be home.