Chapter 19 #2
“We could have stayed home for that,” I yell back with a wink. She giggles, holding her hands out to me, fingers wiggling, body shaking with anticipation.
With a dramatic eye-roll, I plunge into the depths with her.
The balls are waist deep on Poppy and hit high on my thighs.
We move past a few groups of people until we’re in a corner that’s less congested.
Laughing the whole time, we toss balls at each other.
At one point, she tries to trip me with her foot and shove me backwards, failing miserably and managing to topple herself over instead.
I laugh and help her up out of the balls, snaking my arms around her bare waist and squeezing until she squirms. She feels so good in my arms. So right. I love that I can press my lips to her neck whenever I want. Being with her like this is surprisingly easy.
I catch her completely off guard when I wrap my arms around her and fall back, pulling her down on top of me. Her gleeful laughs are all I hear as the balls engulf us, sinking us lower to the colourful ground.
“This is fantastic!” she shrieks, face close to mine as the colours shift from pinks to purples, to blues, to greens, illuminating her happy smile.
“It’s all right,” I smirk from behind her neck.
She rolls over so we’re face-to-face. “Shut up! You’re loving this and you know it.”
“It beats singing competitions in the woods,” I exclaim.
Her eyes narrow and she begins wrestling with me in the balls, trying and failing to pin my arms beside my head. She wraps her legs around my hips, and I roll us so I’m the one on top. I hold her hands above her head and slowly thrust my pelvis into hers. The gasp she sucks in makes me smile.
“Yeah, I’m hard,” I whisper in her ear.
“You’re insatiable!” she giggles, looking around nervously.
“It’s your fault for looking so bloody gorgeous all the time.”
I stare down at her affectionately and she gives her own hips a little thrust. “You better get control of yourself, Harris, or we’re going to end up in the papers like your brothers.”
Shaking with laughter, I release my hold on her and we go back to playfully chucking balls at one another.
Truthfully, it’s the most I’ve laughed in ages.
Playing with Poppy like we used to when we were kids but with the added benefits of being able to kiss her is a pretty fucking fantastic combination.
It makes me wonder what life would have been like if we’d tried this when we were younger.
Would it have worked out? Will it work out now?
There are really no guarantees. I just have to trust that if it doesn’t, she’ll hold up her promise to not let it ruin our friendship because Poppy is not someone I’m willing to lose ever again.
After playing in the balls for almost an hour, we’ve both worked up a sweat and decide to make our way back to the psychedelic bar for a drink. I order a beer and Poppy gets some sort of Saturn drink garnished with a floating balloon.
She looks so bloody happy as she sucks the red liquid through the straw. “This is so much fun! My mum and dad never let me play in ball pits growing up.”
“Why is that?” I ask, taking a pull from my bottle of beer.
“They said children piddle in them.” My nose crinkles and she giggles adorably.
Setting my beer down, I reply, “Until Vi had Rocky, I had no clue what that parental fear is like. But after watching her a couple weeks ago, I have a newfound respect for parents. There are a lot of scary things that could happen to her in the blink of an eye. It’s a lot of pressure to be a parent full-time.
Makes me content to just be an awesome uncle forever. ”
“Not forever, surely,” Poppy scoffs.
I frown. “Probably forever.”
She looks confused. “You’re saying you don’t think you’ll want kids, Mr. ‘I love my big family that I see every single week and can’t go a day without texting or talking to one of them?’”
My eyes narrow. “Just because I’m close to my family doesn’t mean I want to make a family of my own. I’m busy enough handling all their mania. Creating my own would be exhausting.”
Her face falls and she huffs, “Well, only because you let your brothers push you around.” Her tone is sharp.
“They don’t push me around,” I snap back.
She arches a skeptical brow. “Booker, they are nosey buggers and you fold whenever you’re around them. And you drop everything to help them whenever they need you. Same with Vi.”
“They do the same for me. And they’re my family. That’s what Harrises do for each other! What else would you have me do? Ignore them?”
“Of course not because you’re a decent person. But I think you need to live your own life and create your own adventures. They still treat you like the baby brother all the time.”
“They don’t treat me like the baby,” I bark, gripping my beer tightly in my hand.
Her eyes fly wide. “They do, Booker. Don’t get me wrong, I love your family. But you are blind to how different you are with them than you are with me. I mean, bloody hell, you keeper me without hesitation and that’s because I’ve always treated you like an equal.”
Frustration and confusion envelope my anger. “Will you please explain this keeper me phrase again because I still don’t know what you’re going on about when you say those words to me.”
She blurts out her words in a rush. “You just…fucking flourish.” She shakes her hands out in front of her and gets a heated look in her eyes.
“It’s hard to describe, but I find it sexy as fuck.
And I don’t know if you even know when you’re doing it, but it’s like you get ultra-focused and commanding and you just…
intensify every part of your body. It’s…
” She shakes her head with a shiver like the thought is turning her on, which then begins to turn me on.
“It’s hot, but it can also be intimidating.
I think you need to apply that strength to your brothers sometimes and then you wouldn’t feel so pushed over. ”
I want to argue with her, but deep down, I know there’s validity to her claim.
Before Poppy came back, I was feeling downright desperate around my family.
Clinging to what we’ve always been and not giving them space to start their own lives without me.
It wasn’t that I didn’t like Hayden or Indie or Belle.
I just didn’t want to lose sight of my connection to my siblings.
It probably dates back to being younger and having Cam and Tan always running faster than I could keep up.
It used to make me crazy that they’d take off knowing I wouldn’t be able to follow.
I’ve always felt like I’m trying to hold onto them all a bit tighter than they’ve held on to me.
Maybe it’s because I lived with Dad for too long and became too codependent on that constant presence.
It’s probably why I play for his team and have never considered going elsewhere like Gareth or Cam.
It’s also probably why Vi found me a flat near her, and why I let Cam and Tan push me into calling Sidney for the wedding.
I always do what everyone tells me to do.
I look at Poppy through wide eyes and marvel at how insightful she is, even after all these years apart.
She’s always seen me as the man I want to be.
Even as a child, she looked at me like I was Booker, not a Harris Brother.
The idea of caring about someone enough to have children with them terrifies me, but maybe if I start seeing myself the way Poppy sees me, I will warm up to the idea someday.
My voice is soft when I utter, “Sometimes I wonder what I would be like if I never met you.”
“What do you mean by that?” She looks offended, but it’s only because she’s not seeing herself through my eyes. She doesn’t know how instrumental she is to my happiness. How utterly better my life is because she’s in it.
“When we were kids, you just…showed up at the perfect time. You and Pink. You’ve always just…been there.”
“That doesn’t sound very attractive,” she baulks and fiddles with the straw in her glass.
I reach out to cradle her face so she can focus on what I’m about to say. “When you spend a lifetime chasing after people who were always running away from you, having someone to sit still with can be really fucking attractive.”
Her mouth falls open and her green eyes darken as she says, “There you go again.” Her voice is like gravel. I tilt my head in silent question as she swallows and adds, “Keepering me.”
The corner of my mouth lifts as I watch her lower lip pop out from between her teeth.
I lean forward and connect us, parting her lips with my tongue, tasting her, encircling her, pulling her into my arms and clutching her to me like she’s my most prized possession.
I want to taste more than her mouth. I want her back in my flat, in my bed, between my sheets. With me.
I break our connection. Both of us are breathing heavily as I whisper against her lips, “Maybe I do it because you’re a keeper.”
She swallows slowly and whispers back, “Maybe I want to be kept.”