Chapter 23 Maia
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
MAIA
At the beep of my phone, I stuffed my hand in my dress pocket, in such a hurry to see if it was Baird responding to my text that it flew from my fingers when I plucked it out.
It bounced off the back of the head of the man in front of me.
I gasped. “Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry!” My cheeks flamed hotly as he turned to glare at me.
Grace, who sat on my left, smothered her laughter as I awkwardly fumbled to collect my phone from the space between our feet. Once my phone was in hand, I pushed back my hair and straightened in my seat, offering the man another hurried apology.
His expression softened into a flirty smirk. “I’ll forgive you if you put my number in your phone.”
Okay, I had to hand it to him—that was smooth.
Before I could respond, my dad’s palm shot out between me and the guy. “Not with my daughter, Ric.”
Ric’s gaze flew to Dad who had stretched past from his position on Grace’s left to intervene. We were currently sitting in the stands of a local football ground near Grace and Dad’s house, watching Lockie play against a team from Glasgow in the under 16s league.
“Your daughter?” Ric gaped, glancing between me and Dad. “Never, mate.”
“Had her young. That still means you’re too old for her, so keep your eye on your son and off my kid.” Dad’s tone held more than a hint of warning.
“She’s engaged, anyway, so the point is moot,” Grace reminded us with a sweet smile, trying to deflect the tension.
“Aye, okay.” Ric seemed unbothered but then turned around while rubbing the back of his head.
I did feel guilty, but it didn’t stop me from holding my phone screen up to my face.
It was Baird.
Before we arrived at the game, I’d texted him.
I know you’re giving me space, but I’m checking in. I’m here if you need to talk.
I was so worried now he’d finally admitted he was messed up about the game after his injury.
He’d finally texted back.
All OK. Wth the lads at Blantyre 2day. U ok?
My fingers flew over the screen.
Watching Lockie’s match. As long as you’re really OK??
I’d barely lowered the phone when it beeped again.
My heart flipped at Baird’s response.
I’ll be fine. Next time u txt or call it’ll be cos ur ready 2 talk about us.
Muttering under my breath at his stubbornness, I tucked the phone back into my pocket.
“Yes, Lockie!” Dad suddenly roared, standing up and clapping with a bunch of other parents.
Damn it, I’d missed my brother score a goal. “Bloody men distracting me,” I huffed, watching my wee brother celebrate with his teammates.
Grace nudged me with her shoulder even as she clapped along with Dad. “You know the last time you acted like this over a boy was when you had a crush on Charlie!” she yelled over the cheering.
Charlie had been my high school boyfriend and my first big infatuation.
I’d met him when I moved to Edinburgh to live with Dad, and we’d dated all through high school until I left for university in London.
He went to Aberdeen, and I didn’t want to do the long-distance thing.
Looking back on it, it was because I didn’t trust him not to fall for someone else.
At the time I thought what we had was love, but if it was, it was puppy love.
It wasn’t all-encompassing, passionate, can’t stop thinking about him, miss him when he wasn’t there love.
Neither was what I’d felt for Will.
I was starting to worry I was incapable of letting go long enough to feel that way about someone. If Baird was as deep in it with me as he proclaimed … well, he was the last person I wanted to hurt by not being able to fully commit.
Was that what was holding me back from going for it with him?
I leaned into Grace as the cheering died down and the game resumed. “After … can we talk? Just you and me?”
Grace’s brow furrowed with concern, but she nodded. “Of course, sweetheart.”
The noise from the impromptu garden party could be heard throughout every single room in my parents’ home.
Lockie’s team won because he’d scored twice, and he wanted to invite some of the lads back to our house.
Dad had agreed, and now ten kids and their families had crammed into Grace and Dad’s back garden while Dad grilled burgers and hot dogs on the rarely used barbecue.
I’d scored a cheeseburger before asking Grace to follow me upstairs.
We could hear Lockie giggling as we walked into Grace and Dad’s bedroom. I followed the sound to the window and looked out to see Dad making my wee brother laugh as they worked the grill together.
Grace sighed contentedly at my side as we watched them for a few seconds. Lockie was a miniature version of Dad. They were like two peas in a pod in more ways than one. Strangely, I was more like Grace, even though we weren’t blood related.
“I wish every day was like today,” Grace murmured, a familiar tender love in her eyes. “But then we’d never recognize how precious these moments are if life was plain sailing.”
It was that kind of perceptiveness and love that had brought me and Dad together and held us together through the turmoil of him finding out he had a surprise daughter.
It was Grace’s love that helped Dad through the trauma of his imprisonment.
I still remembered his nightmares and how much they scared me.
How Grace seemed to be the only one who could soothe him. That was still true.
“Do you think I’ll ever love anyone the way you love Dad? The way he loves you?”
Her gaze flew to mine in surprise. “You already do. You love us that much.”
“Of course I do. I meant … romantically.”
“Oh.” Grace took my hand and led me over to the end of the bed to sit with her. “Is that what you wanted to talk about? Is it about Will? Or Baird?”
“I haven’t heard from Will.” It was true. After he showed up at my flat, I hadn’t heard from him again. “It’s a relief to have cut him out, and I don’t know what that says about me.”
“It says you didn’t love him. More than that, I think it says he didn’t make you feel good about yourself.”
See? Perceptive. “Did you know that before I broke up with him?”
Grace nibbled on her lip a little nervously.
“Grace?”
She exhaled slowly. “You’re a grown woman and so I leave you to make up your own mind about people. But did I have my doubts about Will? Yes.”
“Did Dad?”
Grace wrinkled her nose. “Well …”
“Grace!”
“Your father didn’t like him. He was only nice to him for your sake. But he thought he was pretentious and cared too much about money.”
“Why didn’t you guys tell me that?”
“Because our opinions matter to you, and as lovely as that is, we didn’t want our opinion screwing anything up for you.”
Impulsively, I pulled her into a tight hug. Grace snorted in surprise but embraced me in return. She kissed the top of my head and asked, “What’s this for?”
“For being the best parents ever.” I sighed and pulled back, revealing all my troubled thoughts in my expression.
She cupped my face tenderly. “Sweetheart, what is going on?”
I told her everything. About my friendship with Baird.
My growing feelings. My worries about his mental state.
Our argument when I tried to get him to talk to me.
Running off to Beth. Beth who had been checking in with me every day to see how I was doing, even though I’d updated her on the ongoing saga between me and Baird.
Then I revealed what Baird had told me about having real feelings for me from the start.
“Well, anyone could see that, sweetie.” Grace gave me a disbelieving look. “How could you not?”
“Seriously?”
“Seriously. Even your dad said Will was in trouble the moment he saw you and Baird together.”
“No way!”
She chuckled. “Yes, way. My goodness, Maia … Baird might be a gregarious character and a flirty charmer, but he watches you like a hawk when you’re in a room together. He follows you around like a puppy dog trying to entertain you and garner your affection.”
My lips twitched at her description.
“Why do you think I was worried about the engagement? I was worried for his sake. I thought you were in denial about his true feelings for you.”
“I wasn’t in denial,” I replied a wee bit breathlessly, disbelieving I could have been so blind.
“I just … Baird is gorgeous and popular and a total player. Why would he give up his chance with as many women as he wants to be with me?” Tears brightened my eyes.
“He said I’m all he wants and I’m all he’s wanted since we met.
But why is it so hard for me to believe that?
I’m so afraid to believe it because he could hurt me.
And I’m so afraid that even if I give into this thing between us, I’ll always have a hand up, holding him back …
that I’ll never let myself love him because of it. ”
My stepmum’s eyes brightened with sympathetic tears as she reached to cup my face in her palms. Her thumbs wiped at my falling tears.
“My darling Maia … you and I are so similar in so many ways. My family, just like your mum, made me feel unworthy. And small. And somewhere along the line, I started to believe it. So … when a very good-looking man moved into my building, one who was so much of a player he makes Baird’s escapades look like child’s play, I was immediately on the defense with him. ”
“Dad,” I whispered. I still remembered the day I turned up at his flat to tell him who I was, and he was out on the landing arguing with Grace. There was such a spark between them even then that I thought they were a couple in the middle of an argument.
“I couldn’t imagine why it would be me, of all women, that would make him want to settle down. Doesn’t it sound familiar, Maia?”
My shoulders slumped. “I hate that you felt that way.” Grace was the classiest, smartest, kindest woman I’d ever met. She challenged Dad. She always had. And he challenged her back. No one in their right mind would look at them together and think they were anything but a perfect match.