Chapter 14
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
~SHAWN~
S he isn’t even gone yet, and we’re throwing a bloody going away party for her.
I’m not ready.
I don’t like it.
I’m just not ready to say goodbye. I’ve grown used to having Lex around. And let’s be honest, the sex is out of this damn world.
But it’s time for her to get back to her life. We just got back from the cabin a couple of hours ago and brought my parents with us. Because it’s a quiet Sunday evening, Keegan decided to shut down for customers, and we’re celebrating Ma and Da being here, and wishing Lexi well on her journey home on Tuesday.
I have one more day with her tomorrow, reading through the script one last time before I send it off to Luke.
“I’m making nachos and burgers for everyone,” Maggie announces. “Along with some bowls of stew. Are there any other requests?”
“I can help you,” Lexi offers, but everyone shakes their heads.
“No way, lass,” Keegan says with a wink. “You keep that arse planted on the stool. Your only job this evening is to enjoy yourself.”
“I’d enjoy myself more if there was music,” she says, glancing around. “And I know most of you can sing and play an instrument.”
“Not me,” Kane replies, shaking his head. “I’ve not a tune in my body.”
“That’s not true,” Stasia says. “You have a lovely voice.”
“Hush,” he says and leans over to kiss his wife.
Maeve and Keegan start singing Molly Malone. Maggie pushes through the swinging kitchen door, carrying a tray full of food that she sets on the bar. She sings with the others for a bit, and then disappears again to load her platter once more.
“This is fun,” Lexi says to me. “Why don’t you sing?”
“Why don’t you sing?”
“Because I want all of you to stay,” she replies immediately.
Rather than sing along with Keegan and Maeve, I pull Lexi into a dance around the hardwood floor. Her blue eyes sparkle as she follows my lead, and when the song is over, I whisk her back to her seat at the bar.
“You guys know how to throw a party,” she says with a laugh and then sips her Guinness. “I was never a beer person until I came here.”
“Guinness isn’t just a beer,” Da says. “And it has to be poured correctly.”
“Oh, Keegan has schooled me in all things Guinness,” Lexi says with a nod. “So I’d better have a couple while I’m still here because I doubt I’ll be able to find a good pint of it in Minneapolis.”
“You’re a smart girl, Lexi,” Da says. “Are you sure you can’t stay longer?”
I watch her carefully. Lexi swallows her stout and licks her lips.
“I do need to get home. My mom’s been looking in on my condo and stuff, but it’s not the same as me being there.”
“That’s true,” Ma says. “I’m sure it’ll be nice to get back to your own life.”
Lexi nods, and Kane leaves the bar for a moment, then returns carrying a box.
“We wanted to send you home with something to remember us,” Kane says and offers her the box.
“You guys did not have to get me a gift.”
“We wanted to,” Maggie says as she sets a bowl of stew in front of Da. “We’re going to miss having you here, Lexi. And not only because you’re so good in the kitchen.”
Lexi grins and dives into the box, pulling the red ribbon free. When she parts the white tissue paper, she gasps.
“Oh my God. Kane, did you make this?”
She pulls a royal blue glass vase out of the box and turns it over in her hands.
“I did,” my brother says. “The color reminded me of your eyes. And you said before that you fancied the vase in Shawn’s house, so I thought you might like one, as well.”
“Are you kidding? I’ll never want to touch it for fear of breaking it. This is an incredible work of art. And a wonderful gift. Thank you so much.”
“You’re welcome,” Kane says. “It’s from the whole family, although no one but me was sweating bullets over it in the barn, I’ll tell you that.”
“He’s so gracious,” Maeve says, rolling her eyes.
I round the bar and get to work building my own Guinness when Keegan joins me. We’re down from where everyone else is gathered, admiring Kane’s vase.
“Are you really just going to let her go?” Keegan asks me.
“Of course. She has a life in Minneapolis.”
“I see the way you look at her.”
“And how is that?”
“Like you’re a lovesick puppy.”
I laugh and set my glass aside to settle. “Well, you’re dead wrong about that. I’m not in love with her. I do enjoy her, and I admire her. And I won’t lie and tell you the physical aspect of our relationship hasn’t been mutually satisfying. But I’ll gladly put her on that plane on Tuesday and be perfectly fine with it.”
The words are like sand in my mouth. I believe them. It’s the absolute truth.
So, why does it feel wrong?
“You’re a bloody eejit,” Keegan says cheerfully and claps his hand on my shoulder. “But, we already knew that.”
“I’m not. I know how I feel. There’s no reason a man can’t have an adult relationship with a woman without needing to marry her.”
“Don’t let Da hear that,” he says. “He might smack you one.”
I shake my head, thinking about the conversation I overheard him having with Lexi this morning. I think my brother would be surprised at how understanding our father can be.
But before I can tell him about it, Lexi’s head whips around, and she pins me with a horrified stare.
“What?” I call out.
“You stabbed your baby sister’s doll and then gave her a burial? What are you, a serial killer?”
“You should know, Lex. You write about them all day long.”
“ Fictional serial killers, you monster.”
Ma’s laughing, clearly delighted by the whole situation.
“I was acting out Hamlet ,” I say in my defense. “And the doll was an innocent bystander.”
“I was scarred for life,” Maggie says with a melodramatic sniff.
“There, there,” Lexi says, patting Maggie’s shoulder. “I’ll protect you from him.”
“Why are women so dramatic?” Keegan asks aloud.
“Watch it, my boy,” Da says. “We’re outnumbered.”
“No.”
I stare at her and feel a headache coming on. We’ve been combing through this screenplay all fucking day, and she’s being as difficult—as obstinate —as it gets.
If I were a true Dom, I’d bend her over my damn knee.
In fact, I think I might anyway.
“Lex—”
“Don’t you Lex me,” she says, pointing her finger at me. “You agreed that we’d leave it as is with the note to Luke and the director that they could try it the alternate way if they felt it needed it.”
“It needs it,” I reply. “And you won’t fucking listen to me. I’m not new to screenwriting, Lexi, and I’m not just trying to piss you off.”
“Feels like it from here,” she says.
“It doesn’t make sense the way you have it written.”
“What? So my editor and the one-point-two million people who read it are all wrong?”
I stand and push my fingers through my hair. I want to tear it out by the roots.
“It works in the book. But not for a movie. If you send her in there, yelling and making a scene, it looks ridiculous. But if we tone her down a bit?—”
“Here we go.”
“It makes her look more professional.”
“I’m not toning her down. She’s a fucking FBI agent moving in on what she thinks is a serial killer, Shawn. She hasn’t just pulled someone over for speeding.”
“I get that. But?—”
“Just. Stop. Talking.” She spins and pins me with her dark blue gaze, fury rolling off her in waves. She’s been different all day. Distant.
As if she’s pushing me away.
“I can’t fucking wait to go home,” she mutters. “I’m sick of having this same argument, every damn day. Just because you’re the screenwriter and I’m not, doesn’t mean you automatically know what’s best for my character.”
“I didn’t say that. I’m trying to explain to you why she shouldn’t run in there, yelling like a crazy person.”
“WATERMELON.”
I freeze and stare at her, unblinking. “What did you just say?”
“Watermelon,” she repeats. “Water-fucking-melon.”
“After everything we’ve done together, all the ways I’ve taken you and tied you up, this is when you pull out your goddamn safe word?”
“I’m done with this,” she says, chest heaving. “You fight me at every turn, and you want to change everything that I worked my ass off for a year creating. If Luke didn’t like the story as it was written, he wouldn’t have bought it.”
“Then why didn’t you just write the screenplay yourself, Lexi? If you didn’t want to partner with someone, if you didn’t want help, why was I brought in at all? Because this is a colossal waste of fucking time for me.”
She stands to leave, but I hurry after her and grab her arm, spinning her back to me.
“Don’t you dare touch me.”
“Oh, we passed this point long ago. You won’t run out of here now. We’re hours away from finishing this, and I’ll be damned if I’ll let you run away just because your feelings are hurt that I don’t want your heroine to act like a fucking stereotypical female agent who thinks she has to prove her prick is bigger than everybody else’s.”
“She does!” she screams in my face. “You don’t get it because you’re a man—and young, and handsome—but trust me when I tell you that women do have to prove that their dicks are bigger than everyone else’s in this world, Shawn. And if you think otherwise, you’re delusional. I don’t care if it doesn’t look good for a movie screen. It’s real fucking life and sending her into that room acting all meek and polite isn’t going to get the job done.”
We’re glaring at each other now, breathing hard. The room sparks with sexual energy.
I don’t hesitate. I push her back against the wall and descend on her, kissing the hell out of her. She doesn’t push me away. She rips my shirt in half, shocking and delighting me at the same time.
The sound of ripping fabric fills the air as we struggle to get each other naked as fast as possible. I turn and carry her to the desk, reach into a drawer, and protect us both before I push inside of her and ride her with savage vigor.
Her eyes are on mine, a mixture of lust and hate in their depths as she grips me and gives just as good as she gets.
I’ve never had angry sex before. I don’t know that I’ve ever been this frustrated with another human being before.
“You drive me crazy,” she growls and fists her hands in my hair.
“Back at you, angel.” I bite the ball of her shoulder and then pull out of her so I can turn her over and bend her over the desk. I smack her ass, hard, before pushing back in. “If you’re being mean to drive me away, to make me hate you, it won’t fucking work.”
I can feel her slipping away from me. I’ve felt it all damn day, the distance and coldness. Maybe it’s her way of letting go now so it won’t bother her later. I know she won’t be here in another twenty-four hours. I’m not in love with her.
But I’m not ready to say goodbye.
And right now, in this moment, I don’t have to.
She pushes back against me and slams her fist into the top of the desk, again both surprising and delighting me. Her intensity, every time we do this, is maybe the sexiest thing about her.
She knows what she enjoys, and she knows what she wants from me, and that’s a turn-on. But she’s also not the kind of lover who takes control.
I wouldn’t be content with that.
She follows my lead and trusts me implicitly, even now when she’s spitting mad and ready to punch me.
I feel her muscles start to contract, but I don’t want her to come yet, so I pull out and squat behind her, spreading her cheeks wide before licking her wet slit.
“Damn you,” she moans.
“I didn’t say you could come yet.”
“You’re not the boss.”
But she whimpers when I tease her lips, and when I lightly drag my fingers over the globes of her ass, sending goose bumps rushing all over her.
“Oh, I do believe I am the boss right now, angel.”
Her breath catches as I stand and rub the head of my cock through her folds, then over her clit before pushing inside her again.
I set a punishing rhythm until we both crash over the waves of desire and fall into a fire so hot, it could incinerate everything around us.
“I’m still mad,” she whispers as she lies against the desk, catching her breath.
“That makes two of us,” I reply as I step back and discard the condom.
“What did that prove?”
“That despite the fact that I’m frustrated out of my bloody mind, I’m still hot as hell for you, Lex. And you’re sexy as fuck.”
She stands and turns to face me, naked and gorgeous, her lips swollen from my kisses, and her hair a mess from my hands.
“Being attracted to each other has never been an issue.”
“I didn’t think we had any issues to speak of.”
“Only your bullheadedness,” she says, shaking her head. “I need to go find some clothes that aren’t ruined so we can finish this.”
I hurry up behind her and scoop her up into my arms. I press my face to her neck as I carry her to my bedroom.
“Let’s not be angry, angel.”
“Then leave my story be.”
“Fine.” I sigh and lay her on the bed. “We’ll leave it as it is.”
She grins. “Thank you. Was that so hard?”
I laugh and reach for another condom, already turned on again. “Actually, yes.”
She pauses and holds my face in her hands. “You truly believe it’s better the other way, don’t you?”
“I do, yes.”
She sighs deeply and then rubs her hand over her forehead. “I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but we’ll do it your way. However, I’ll talk with Luke and fill him in on this. He’ll have the final say.”
I drag my nose up her neck. “You’re going to fill him in on this ?”
I push two fingers inside her and watch the beautiful smile spread over her lips.
“No. This will stay between us.”
“Good answer.”