23. Pez
Pez
As we get to Daphne’s house, I’m grateful that Sabre remains outside to call the club.
I’m not sure what he needs to talk to them about.
I figure it’s because he knows there’s tension between me and Daphne and I need to fix it.
I’m grateful. I don’t think I could handle this distance with her overnight.
I need to try and fix it now. I’m just worried what will happen when she hears about my past. It’s something I can’t put off.
I have to leave her tonight to take Sabre home, so I refuse to do it now.
When I tell her, I need time to spend with her to try to make her understand.
It hurts that she doesn’t follow me into Cammie’s room.
It’s just a sign of the distance she’s trying to put between us.
Things felt so good earlier. I’m not sure how they turned on a dime, but I need to fix it.
I walk over to Cammie’s bed, and maneuver so I can turn down the cover on her bed, while holding her body close.
It’s not easy. It would have been nice to have Daphne’s help.
I’m thankful as hell that she’s such a heavy sleeper.
Once I get her settled, I put her stuffed Olaf in her arms. When I pull back, I watch as she snuggles into it, burying her head against it.
She’s out cold. I have a moment of panic, afraid that she could smother herself by holding it so tightly.
I bend down again, trying to remove it from her grip.
For a kid, she’s got a strong grip. Cammie’s also managed to twist her body around it.
There’s no way I’m going to get it out without waking her.
I’ll have to get Daphne to help me. She’s trying to push me away, but I’m not going to let her.
Besides, she’ll be as worried as I am about Cammie smothering herself.
I look down and see Cammie’s stomach rise and fall, making me feel just a little less panicked.
Still, I need to hurry. I leave the room, walking fast to get to Daphne.
We need to get Cammie settled and then, I’m going to make her listen to me … somehow.
“Daphne, I need you to?—”
“Eli, can we just take a break and let me deal with all the pressures hitting me right now?” she asks, standing by the island in her kitchen.
She’s yanking my heart out, but I’m not walking away.
It probably won’t do me any good. Even Nora never chose me, but I have to try.
With Daphne the need is so much stronger than anything I’ve felt before.
“Let’s talk about that in a bit. I need you to help me take Cammie’s stuffed Olaf.
She’s wrapped around it holding it in place.
” I expect her to take off running, as worried as I am.
Instead, she stands there looking at me as if I’ve lost my mind.
“Did you hear what I said?” I grumble. “We need to hurry.” Panic is clawing at me.
I just need to know she’s okay, then I can focus on something else.
“Why do you want to take her stuffed animal from her? She loves that Olaf,” Cammie says, shaking her head with her face scrunched up in genuine confusion.
“Because she’s wrapped around it and has her head buried in it,” I explain.
I thought that would move her into action, but it doesn’t.
She just keeps standing there staring at me as if I’m the one that lost my mind, when it’s clearly her.
“Daphne, we need to check on her and get that damn toy from her,” I grumble, walking around her. If she’s not going to do it, I will.
I get about five steps away before I feel her hand snake around my arm to stop me. “What are you so worried about, Eli?”
“Skittles, her head is buried in that thing. There’s no way she’s taking in oxygen.
I’m going to get it out of the bed. In the morning you can tell her Olaf ran away to the Ice Kingdom because Elsa was lonely,” I huff.
I turn to leave again, when the sound of Daphne’s laughter stops me in my tracks.
What in the world could be funny about any of this?
“You want me to tell Cammie that Olaf ran away?” she gasps—still laughing.
“To the …” She stops talking because the laughter takes over again.
“To the …” Again, she has to stop to drag air in her lungs over her freaking giggles.
Tears are running down her face and she makes another one of those cute snorts that escapes her sometimes when she laughs.
“Ice …” Okay, her snort is cute, but that laughter is starting to annoy me.
“Kingdom,” she announces it like she can’t hold back any longer, laughing so hard that she has to lean on me to keep standing.
I will admit that I kind of like that part.
“I’m glad you think I’m funny. Now, can we go save our girl?
” I grumble. She stops looking up at me, her tears running down her cheek have slowed down and her eyes have a look of wonder on them.
I don’t understand the change, but I’m too worried about Cammie, to ask right now.
Her hand comes up the side of my face. I cup it with mine.
“Skittles, I love when you touch me, but I need to?—”
“Eli, honey, I promise you Cammie is okay.”
“You don’t know that. We need to check on her,” I urge her.
Finally, she takes my hand, and we head to Cammie’s room.
It’s about time too. I wasn’t waiting any longer.
I’d decided just to wake her up and distract her while hiding that damn snowman.
What the hell was I thinking when I bought that? I need to be more careful.
She stops by Cammie’s opened door and squeezes my hand.
“See? She’s resting fine.” I look over at the beautiful little girl with hair just like her mother’s and my heart squeezes in my chest. She’s still sound asleep.
Olaf has fallen down. He’s lying on her arm, but most of him is down by her stomach now.
“See?” she breathes out quietly.
“Maybe we should take him anyway—just to be safe,” I suggest. She grins at me, tugs on my arm, and pulls me back into the living room.
I can’t help looking back at Cammie’s room—still worried.
Daphne practically drags me into the living room, going so far as to push me on her sofa.
I don’t mind as much once she sits down in my lap.
For a minute it’s like every dream I’ve ever had come true.
I pull her around so she’s straddling me instead of just being in my lap.
She lets out a squeak of surprise, but she doesn’t fight me.
“Satisfied?” she quips, smiling down at me.
“Not yet, but I feel better,” I admit.
She lets out a giggle and then cups the side of my face, letting her thumb brush just under my eye.
The look on her face is so tender that I could stay like this, basking in it, for the rest of my life and be happy.
“If your child is younger than twelve months, stuffed animals are bad. I’ll even admit that I kept them away from Cammie until she was around two and a half or three.
She’s fine now. I never let her have a lot of them, mostly because I don’t like clutter, and they can be bad for allergies. ”
“Oh,” I mutter, starting to feel stupid.
Daphne leans down pressing her forehead against mine, both of her hands on my face now. My eyes close from the sweetness of everything I’m experiencing. “What am I going to do with you, Eli?” she whispers. She sounds almost torn and my heart tightens in my chest.
“I’m hoping you want to keep me,” I admit laying myself completely bare to her. After the way Nora did me and with my history, I’m scared as hell. I’d rather face down a club of men pointing automatic rifles at me than to risk this woman destroying me by sending me away—but I have no choice.
“You better watch it, Eli. It’s starting to sound like you more than just care about me. You even claimed Cammie as ours.”
Shit. I didn’t realize I did that. “Does that upset you?”
“No. You’ve already shown her more care than her own father has in her life.”
“I love her,” I admit.
She smiles, “I can tell. Now, I’m just wondering how you feel about her mother.”
I quietly clear my throat, looking into her beautiful green eyes.
Without realizing it, my hands move to her gorgeous, copper curls, letting them thread through my fingers.
Everything about this woman appeals to me—calls to me in ways nothing ever has before.
She’s my home. I know it down in my soul.
“I’ve been wondering the same about you,” I hedge.
“My divorce isn’t final yet, Eli.”
“It will be. Besides, your ex has moved on. I don’t see why you can’t.
That is, unless you are still in love with him.
” Just saying that to her makes me mad. I’m not sure I can hold myself back if she admits that she still has feelings for him.
I’ll destroy him for what he’s done to her.
Maybe if he’s out of the way, she’ll eventually come to?—
“Come back to me, Eli.” I stop mid-thought and turn my attention back to her. She’s smiling down at me. “You zone out when you are struggling and trying to sort things out. Do you want to tell me what you’re thinking?”
“Do you want to tell me if you still love your shit-for-brains ex.”
She laughs. “Shit-for-brains?”
“A man would have to be dumb as dirt to ever toss your love aside and choose that bitch to warm his bed. He might be stupid, Skittles, but I’m not.”
She smiles and this time a tear slips from her eye that has nothing to do with her earlier laughter.
“I don’t love him, Eli. Lately, I’ve been wondering if I ever did.
We got together in high school, and I thought it was love.
We were comfortable together. He had a vision for his life and said he supported mine.
The two of us were going to face the world as a team.
” She lets out a cold laugh. “Obviously that never happened.”
“I want you, Daphne. I want to build a life with you, with Cammie and maybe, if you’re willing, even more kids.
I fell for you the minute I saw you and it just keeps getting stronger.
I’ve only felt fear one other time and the thought of you turning me down, of being forced out of yours and Cammie’s lives terrifies me like nothing else ever has. ”
“My life is a mess, Eli.”
“I don’t give a damn. I want to be the man you lean on as you rebuild it. Hell, I’ve been frozen since leaving Nora. I’d like for us to rebuild our lives together. I’m not Dane?—”
“Thank God,” she laughs.
I grin. “I’m not him. I know how precious you and Cammie are. I promise you, I’m in this forever.”
“Eli—”
“We can go as fast or as slow as you want, sweetheart. I’m not trying to rush you. This is just me laying my cards on the table and telling you that I want and need to be in your lives.”
“Lives?” she giggles.
“Yours and Cammie’s. You’re a package deal and honestly, I wouldn’t want it any other way.”
“Shut up, and kiss me, Eli,” she whispers.
I take her mouth in a hungry kiss, letting her feel all of the passion that I’ve tried my best to temper when I kissed her before.
Something very fucking near to a growl releases from her mouth as she kisses me back.
My cock was already aroused once she sat on my lap.
With the ravenous way she’s not only meeting my kiss, but taking what she wants, I’m rock hard.
My fingers bite into her hips as I hold her down, grinding myself against her body.
I feel like I’m on fire for her. It’s my turn to growl as her body begins rocking against me.
My hand slides up to tunnel under her shirt, my calloused fingers brushing against her silky-smooth skin, that’s so hot to the touch, it feels as if it marks me for life.
There will never be a time when I don’t want this woman. Never.
I know I can’t take her—not here. The timing is all wrong. Yet the need to watch her come is so strong that I can’t stop myself. I let my fingers continue to travel, until I’m pushing under her bra. I palm her breast loving how the hard nipple pushes against my hand—as if begging for more.
“Eli,” she whimpers as my lips travel from her mouth down the sweet valley of her neck.
“Right here, baby,” I rumble, my voice hoarse and full of need.
“It feels so good,” she whimpers, her breathing ragged.
“I want to make you feel better. Will you let me, sweetheart?”
“But Dad, Cammie …” she says, completely torn.
“I just want to help you ease that ache between your legs. I can’t make love to you tonight. When I do that, I want to be able to take my time with you. I can give you what you need for now. Let me do that, Daphne. Please?”
She worries her bottom lip, her hair mussed from our lovemaking, her face flushed, and her hips still rocking against me. I bring my free hand up to brush my thumb across her lip. I wait for her answer and the entire time, I feel as if I can’t breathe.
“Okay,” she says. That one word is a mixture of submission and a moan of hunger, and nothing has sounded better in my entire life.
I stand up with her in my lap. She immediately wraps her legs around me, and just like that something snaps into place.
I will do anything to have this woman. To feel her legs wrapped around me, her body submitting to me, is like nothing I’ve experienced in this world, but I want more.
I won’t stop until I can hear her say she loves me, hear her admit that she’s utterly and completely mine.
For now, I’ll settle for the way she’s clinging to me and directing me to her bedroom.