Chapter 42
Slade
I’m insane with need, and I wrap around Bane like I’m a monkey.
He cups my ass, grinding me against him. His cum is smeared over my chin and neck, but neither of us gives it a second thought as he kisses to conquer me. Like the titan he is, I submit, not even thinking about resisting whatever this is.
I’m so turned on and worked up by how he used my mouth for his pleasure—something so carnal and filthy shouldn’t be doing the things to me that it is—and I’m so close to my orgasm that stars are dotting my vision.
But then they’re gone, and Bane is setting me on my feet.
“No,” I cry.
“Just give me a moment to check in with you.”
“Bane.” My chest heaves. “I need to come. I was so close. Now is a really fucking bad time.” It’s half-snarl, half-whine.
My lust-filled, hazy vision clears as I stare at him. I see the dark, dangerous man he is. He truly is magnificent in all his naked glory; somehow even darker and more dangerous. And he’s naked. Not just nude, but his expression hides nothing.
He wants to ruin me. He wants to destroy me for all other men. And that doesn’t scare me like it should.
I’m fully clothed, and he’s completely bare—a reverse power dynamic. He’s fully exposed, body and more.
The power is in my court; I know it is, like always with Bane, at least for everything except my freedom to leave here.
With the power in my hands, though, and feeling like Bane is with me, both figuratively and literally, I’ve never felt so separate from another human being.
Show him, my mind whispers. Take this step in trusting him.
Suddenly, my hands tremble. He misses nothing, and when he reaches for me, I step back.
“Slade.” He closes his hands into fists. “I took it too far,” he says, worrying about how he fucked my face and owned my air. “Did I hurt you?”
I shake my head, and his concern eases slightly. As I lift my hands, their trembling escalates.
I’m torn between wanting Bane to see me and doubting that decision, fearing he might only see someone broken and ugly, guilty and responsible for the torture and death of fourteen people.
But the need to show him wins. I close my eyes because, as much as I need him to see me, I can’t look at him while he does.
Gripping the hem of my shirt, I do something I’ve never done before. I let him see me, all of me, all of my scars, with my heart and soul exposed and vulnerable.
“Slade.”
In that one word is Bane’s understanding of what I’m about to do, and it fuels me with more strength to see this through.
With my eyes remaining closed, I remove my shirt, then my boots and jeans, until I’m standing there in my bra and panties, trembling.
I focus on Bane’s ragged and heavy breaths. It silences the alarm sounding in my head, warning that this is a mistake, and keeps the Numbers’ screams contained.
I jolt when I feel his fingers slowly trace the two scars on my chest, his touch gentle and unwavering. His lips are next as he kisses their path. I keep my eyes squeezed shut as he does the same thing for all of my scars.
When he’s finished, I’m shaking so hard I can hardly stand, and I feel him close even though he’s no longer touching me.
The room is silent as I try not to panic that I made a huge mistake, that Bane will think I’m weak and hideous. That I’m not worthy of love…his love.
“Open your eyes, Slade.”
I shake my head, feeling a tear streak down my cheek.
“Please, baby. I need you to look at me.” His voice is raw and deep.
I finally obey, opening my eyes and finding him before me, on his knees.
The look on his face rocks me to my core—fury mixed with awe and a fierce protectiveness.
“You’re the most exquisitely beautiful person I’ve had the privilege to lay my eyes on.
The strongest, too.” His hazel eyes burn bright with wetness and are wild with something that looks like savage love.
“And you’re my fierce, strong warrior, who I will worship at your feet, and honor and protect you always.
I will protect your body, and I will fight like hell to protect your soul.
Thank you—” His voice cracks with emotion.
“For gifting me with your trust to see you. All of you.”
My throat is so thick and constricted, I can hardly swallow or breathe.
“You’re perfect, Slade.”
Another tear escapes to trail down my cheek, and I shake my head. “How can you say that?”
He presses his forehead to my belly, then kisses the top of the scar that starts on the right side of my lower abdomen and runs down the inside of my hip.
He looks back up at me with that fierce protectiveness and look of savage love. “Because each of these marks bears witness of you standing strong against something that would’ve made most people shatter. Yet, here you stand, continuing to win against it. And I’m so fucking proud of you.”
I reach down, taking his face in my hands, his scruff scratching my palms. I’ve never wanted a man more than him, and in this moment, I know it’s Bane or no one.
But I can’t stay here because I’m a walking time bomb for him and the MC.
The thought of him hurt, or any of my rediscovered family being hurt, especially because of me makes my chest cave in on itself.
But the need to connect with him overpowers the worries and guilt.
He’s the only person who has been able to give me the strength to start finding my way back to myself.
To start healing. And right now, I need this connection with him more than my next breath, regardless of how selfish that makes me.
“I need you, Bane. Please. I need you.” My voice shakes, and he rises to his feet, slowly towering over me.
The man is huge—all parts of him, especially his cock that is stirring back to life—but nothing about him scares me, even though he has the power to break me.
“I need you,” I repeat. “All of you. Everything you’ll give me.”
He presses his thumb on my bottom lip, staring at it before he lifts his gaze to me. “There’s no going back from this, Slade.”
“I know,” I whisper.
But do I really know and understand that? All I really know is that I’m playing with fire.
Yet, I’m willing to get burned.
Reaching behind my back, I flick the clasp of my bra undone, and his jaw ticks. I slide one strap off my shoulder, and his eyes darken. When I slide the other one and let my bra fall to the floor, his hands clench as his eyes rake over me.
When my panties slide down my legs and pool at my feet, he rasps, “Fucking hell, Slade.”
He still doesn’t move to touch me, but with my re-awakened sexuality, I’m not self-conscious, knowing that he’s trying to remain in control.
“I’m not a good man, baby,” he growls.
He’s a strong man, one with morals to guide him, even though he is a ruler in the criminal underworld, and I know he’s not what society would consider a ‘good man’. But I don’t want a good man; I don’t need a hero. I just want and need him.
Lying back, I prop my feet up on the bed and let my knees fall apart, exposing myself completely to him. “I want you, Bane.” Then, with a sly smile. “If you won’t do it, then I will.”
He’s visibly shaking as he stares while I insert two fingers into myself. I’m soaked, and I rub the wetness over my clit.
He surges to the bed and bats my hand away. “I told you this pussy is mine, and I own every orgasm it has,” he growls darkly.
A thrill rips through me. “Then take it. Own it. Own me. Daddy.”
An animalistic noise rips from Bane as he buries his face between my legs. My back arches at the near-vicious assault on my pussy, and I thread my fingers through his hair, holding him to me and grinding against his face, taking my pleasure from him, just like he had with me.
My legs shake from the sensations and pleasure, his scruff over my sensitive flesh adds to it and my whole body starts to tremble. My clit throbs, ignored and protesting. Until he sucks it into his mouth and continues to suckle it like he’s trying to pull it free from my body.
Well, I’m only human, only flesh and bones, so I come with my whole body shaking, my back arching, my eyes rolling back, and a scream ripping from my lips.
“That’s it, my perfect girl.”
Lewd, wet noises join my cries as Bane finger-fucks me to remain floating in the clouds of heaven. He scissors his fingers, then swivels them to press on my front wall. With his other hand, he presses down on my stomach, and the action puts pressure on some amazing spot, and I partially sit up.
“Give daddy another one,” he orders, waging a war on my insides. “Then I’m going to pump you full of my cum.”
I lie back and…writhe. That’s the only word to describe my body as it undulates between trying to get closer to him, trying to get more of that pleasure that’s borderline painful and needing to escape it.
Bane pushes both my knees to my chest, making my hips roll up, and my eyes fly open wide when he parts my ass cheeks and tongues…
“Oh God.” My legs shake.
“I’ll take that as ‘keep going’.” His fingers dive back into my pussy, but then he’s pressing one slick finger against the tight ring of muscle of my ass. “Stop?”
I try to speak, I really do, but can only make a garbled sound, so I shake my head vigorously, telling him not to dare stop.
My legs twitch as he breaches the ring of muscle but doesn’t go any further. He just holds his fingertip inserted there while he goes back to finger-fucking me and licking me until I’m sweating and seeing stars.
“Please,” I whimper, needing to come so badly, I’m losing control of my entire body.
“Next time, I’ll lube this tight little ass and finger-fuck it just as thoroughly as your perfect cunt.”
Sounds fill the room. Sounds of my obscene wetness and my cries of pleasure.
He shifts, and I lift my head to look at him between my legs. He keeps the tip of his finger in my ass and is using his other hand to push three fingers into me. My pussy burns slightly when he spreads them, but it feels so, so good.
“I need to stretch you out some because I won’t be able to take it slow.”
“Not…slow,” I try to speak actual words.
“Be a good girl and let go.” He hammers his fingers, and his mouth is on my clit again. When he bites it, that hurtles me toward my end.
As the pressure builds and lifts me, I inhale deeply, feeling everything within me seize. In my mind’s eye, I’m flying into the air with a ceiling coming quick and fast. And then, like a bomb blasting the way, the ceiling and every wall within me explodes, and I fly free.
“Bane,” I scream. “Bane!”
Ecstasy and pleasure rip through every cell, and I claw for him, needing him as my body convulses.
“You’re mine, Slade.”
Then he nudges at my entrance, and with a harsh thrust of his hips, he rams into me.
The burn intensifies as I stretch to accommodate his girth, and I cry out, not in pain, but in sheer joy and euphoria, “Yours, Bane. Only yours.”
I’ll only ever be this man’s. The man who woke the demons I tried to keep buried and controlled. Who helped me learn how to control them.
And the man who I’ll need to leave in order to save when my demons come to claim their pound of flesh.