Chapter 46 Slade
Slade
Earlier in the day
I slam the hood of the Subaru WRX. To most people, it’s a beat-up piece of shit, but it has the good bones of a rally car—although, I suspect that wasn’t Badger’s purpose when he hauled this in on a flatbed truck.
He only brought this in for me to have something of my own to work on, rather than helping him maintain and repair the Havoc Guardians’ bikes.
A shop rag hits my chest, and I catch it before it hits the floor.
“Go wash up and get some grub, kid.” Badger eyes me with his one good eye. “You’re too small, always were, like the runt of the litter. And all I’ve seen you eat today was candy.”
Yeah, my love of candy might be getting a bit out of hand
But when Bane isn’t here for us to cook together, I don’t have much appetite, even though he ensures there are meals prepped for me, so I don’t have to eat what the Bunnies make.
I’m quickly becoming reliant on Bane for everything: my food, my emotional control—okay, I seem to have mastered that, even when Bane isn’t around—my orgasms.
That last one is due to him demanding that all my orgasms are his to give.
Like, who gets turned on by that? And obeys?
Shaking my head at myself, I toss the rag into the bin to be washed. “Same time, same place tomorrow, Badge?”
He grins. “You know it, kid. I like having you here working with me.”
That’s a sobering reminder that if the threat against me catches up, Badger could be one of the ones who pay the price.
Instead of answering, I nod and swallow past the lump in my throat and turn to face today’s shadow.
Jez hops down from the bench when he sees that I’m ready to leave.
“Such a fucking waste,” I mutter as I walk toward the door, and he hurries to catch up.
“Excuse me?” Jez’s handsome face is insulted, and his dark hair catches in the wind as we step outside.
I realize he thinks I called him a fucking waste.
“Not you as an individual, but to have a member do nothing productive for the MC and just watch over me like a shadow of doom is a fucking waste.”
He shrugs. “I’m just a Prospect, Slade, listening to your boyfriend and my VP.”
I glare at him. “Bane isn’t my boyfriend.”
Right? He’s not.
Even though we spend almost every minute together when he’s available. Even though I spend the nights in his bed, passed out from pleasure. Even though he has stuck to his promise of no other woman since I’ve been here.
And even though he’s told me many times that I’m his, and says things like, ‘This is my pussy,’ and ‘All your orgasms are mine’.
Shit.
Jez’s brows lift. “Oh, so he’s just your fuckboy.” He grins. “I get it. Good on ya, Slade.”
Choosing to ignore him and the swirling questions in my head about what Bane and I are, I stalk toward the clubhouse. It was warmer than usual today, and people are enjoying the compound’s green spaces.
Kids squeal, and I look at them jumping, laughing, and running to climb the play structures. Guilt rears again because those little ones could be hurt because of me.
My eyes shift to the group of women visiting, laughing and watching over the children. Trinity is there, and she waves with a big smile.
I wave back, then turn away, feeling my guilt and fear grow. I scan the bikes parked outside the clubhouse, but quickly notice Bane’s bike isn’t there.
Beatrice and her bitch-bunny posse are, though. They’re lounging on a bench, and Beatrice is trying to kill me with her eyes.
“Shit, I forgot my phone in the shop,” Jez says. “You’ll be good if I run back to get it real quick?”
Hell’s yeah.
Not looking a gift horse in the mouth for this sudden shadow-free freedom, I keep walking, and he takes my silence for affirmation and sprints back to the shop.
As I stride toward the clubhouse, Beatrice rises off the bench with her entourage, then they hurry toward me. Beatrice is trying to look nonchalant, but she’s not fooling me. I’m not an idiot; she’s taking advantage of my sudden aloneness. I see the excited gleam in her eyes.
Unease rises within me.
What the hell does she want?
She stops in front of me, not daring to physically touch me. Bane’s warning is deterrent enough, but I’m not afraid of her, knowing I could knock her teeth out if I wanted to.
I don’t stop, though, and knock my shoulder against hers as I push past, refusing to be the one to side-step out of the way.
“Bitch,” she hisses.
I don’t get far, though, because the rest of her friends form a half-circle around me. I stop and regard them. I’m not afraid, but that feeling of unease rises.
“Hurry, Destiny,” the Bunny with short, red-dyed hair looks around nervously.
My quick scan of the compound yard tells me that the Old Ladies have taken notice of us, and Trinity is already on her feet, ready to come over here.
Clearly, Beatrice is the instigator of this little gathering, so I turn to her.
Her top lip peels back, reminding me of a dog snarling. “Does he kiss you?”
I tilt my head to the side, staring her down. “Ravenously. And frequently.”
Fury flashes across her face. “He’ll get sick of you soon.”
I shrug. “He hasn’t yet.”
“Destiny,” one of the Bunnies says, low and urgent. “Hurry up.”
In my periphery, I see Trinity get closer, and she has a look of anger. Then a phone is shoved in my face, and it takes me a moment to focus on it.
It’s a picture.
My stomach falls out, and I swear my heart just screeched to a halt.
“See for yourself what Bane gets up to when your back is turned,” Beatrice hisses in my ear.
Then, she and her phone are gone.
With the picture of Bane.
The picture which shows him getting his dick sucked by Beatrice on her knees.
I don’t care.
Which is the biggest lie I’ve ever tried to tell myself.
The motherfucking lying son of a bitch.
His vow and promise not to be with any other woman while he helped me feel, while he was with me, is a big, fat fucking joke.
But why should I be surprised?
Bane is a member of a motorcycle club where there’s pussy-on-tap and where monogamous relationships—which, a relationship is not what Bane and I are in, or correction, were in—don’t exist in their world.
Bane is just like my father, who repeatedly cheated on my mom.
Why the hell am I shocked? Or feel hurt and betrayed like an absolute idiot?
“Slade?” Trinity looks at me after glaring at the backs of the retreating Bunnies. “What happened? What did they do?”
My eyes swing to Trinity, and hers dart over my face, assessing my emotionless expression as the numbness returns with a vengeance.
Fuck Bane. Fuck him and all the progress I made to return to the land of the living and feeling. In my experience, this is all highly overrated.
And fuck him for making me believe that I could battle my demons.
I push everything I’ve come to feel regularly and shove it all back down, deep where it fucking belongs.
“Beatrice and her slut crew weren’t the ones who did anything.” I resume walking back to the clubhouse.
“Slade,” Trinity calls.
But I don’t stop.