11. Truth
Truth
Iwas tired, and I didn’t want to fake it with Gio anymore. I wanted to go back home. I missed my girls, my man, Amir. And I was tired of crying in silence.
One day, Gio left me in the house all day.
I tried every door and window to get out.
Everything was locked from the outside. I decided not to cry, and to be honest, I was tired of doing that.
I took advantage of the time that I had alone, and it was kind of nice, but it wasn’t home.
It wasn’t my normal. It didn’t feel like the treat it was supposed to be, but that made me decide to be honest with Gio when he did come in.
For most of the day I was lost in my thoughts with the TV playing in the background, trying to figure out what was gonna be the best way to tell him, what was gonna be the softest.
I made a script and repeated it over and over again, but for some reason, I felt like that shit was gonna send him over the edge.
I was low-key scared of Gio a lil’ bit, and I had never been scared of that nigga before, but he wasn’t the same man I was with for years. He is the hurt version of himself who says he is good when he really is not.
I walked into the kitchen for a lil’ break and some water, looked in the fridge, and realized that nigga had the fridge and freezer stocked up, and I smiled to myself.
I knew what I was gonna do.
I pulled out all the food I needed.
Steak, lobster, potatoes to make homemade mashed potatoes, butter, and some broccoli. I looked around for the seasoning cabinet, and once I found it, I pulled out all that I needed, and I got to cooking.
I took my time getting the food together. In my head, I was calling it my farewell dinner.
After everything was done, I went upstairs and got changed into one of the dresses he bought me, and did my makeup and my hair. I finished just in time for him to walk through the door.
“Islah?” Gio yelled out for me.
I smiled in the mirror and took a deep breath.
“You can do this. This ends today,” I said to myself.
I walked outta the bathroom and out of the room and down the steps. He was standing at the bottom of the steps, licking his lips and smiling at me.
“Damn, baby girl! You look good,” he said as I reached the bottom of the steps.
“Thank you, Hun. I cooked dinner. I just have to drop the lobster; come sit down.”
Gio followed me to the kitchen and took a seat at the island while I turned the stove on.
“So, how was your day?” I asked.
“It was good, made some money, seen some people I haven’t linked with in a minute.”
I nodded. “That’s good. I am proud of you.”
He smiled at me like a child smiling at his mom when she praised him. I could tell I was breaking him down.
“What made you cook?” he asked.
I added salt to the water, giving me a second to think.
“Oh, I just didn’t realize all this was in there and thought it would be nice to do.”
I looked back at him, and he smiled.
“Yeah, I know you liked to cook, and I missed your cooking.”
I smirked and looked back at the water.
“Is there anything you want to add to the house?”
I closed my eyes, but he couldn’t see me.
“No, I think that should be your decision.”
He didn’t say anything else.
Once the water started to boil, I dropped the lobster and focused on them while he was listening to something on his phone. Once they were done, I fixed our plates with everything else and slid his to him.
He looked at it, placing his phone down.
“Damn, girl, this looks good.”
I smiled. “Thank you, it’s just something slight.”
He got out the silverware.
“Nah, baby girl. Ain’t nothing slight about it.”
I took a bite of my steak, and that shit was good. I closed my eyes as it melted in my mouth.
We didn’t talk for a few minutes, both of us tearing our plates up.
Finally, we came up for breath. Gio went to the cabinet, pulled out two cups, and fixed us some lemonade. I took a sip of my juice and watched as he did the same before he went back to eating.
“So, Gio, I want to talk,” I said softly.
“Wussup?”
“So I have been thinking about everything, and I want you to know I really did try, but…I don’t want to be with you. I am happy with the life I have in Atlanta for so many reasons, and I want to get back to it.”
Gio chewed and swallowed the food that he had in his mouth.
“No.”
That nigga flat-out said no.
“What do you mean, no?”
He shook his head. “You haven’t tried long enough. You need to try longer.”
I took a deep breath. “Gio, I can’t try any longer. I need to get back home.”
“You are home,” he shot back while looking around. “We have a forever thing.”
“We don’t, Gio. Please, you promised me you wouldn’t turn into that person you were before. Just let me get your phone, and I will get an Uber.”
Gio continued to cut up his steak and take bites like he didn’t hear what I said.
“I’m not giving you shit,” he finally said.
I tried to hold back my tears, but I couldn’t.
“Please, Gio…I have to go.”
He laughed. “You have nowhere to go. Where that nigga Love at? Has he come to get you? Has he called? That nigga is not thinking about you, you know why? Cause he knows where you belong. With me!”
“Love has been there watching and helping me build myself up after you. That man loves me.”
“That man,” Gio said through bites of his food, “will die if he shows up here.”
I tilted my head to the side, looking at him. Then I stood up and started to walk out of the kitchen.
“WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING?!” Gio yelled.
I didn’t respond. I just started to run through the living room and tried to get to the front door, and he tripped me, making me fall on the floor. I screamed out in pain and anger while grabbing my stomach, thinking about my baby.
Gio grabbed my arms and dragged me up the steps as I cried, screamed, and pleaded out loud for him to just let me go.
“I TOLD YOU! YOU ARE NOT GOING NO FUCKIN’ WHERE!” he yelled at me. “I AM YOUR HOME! I AM YOUR EVERYTHING!”
He pulled me into the room and tossed me on the floor, slamming the door behind him.
I crawled over to the door, but it was locked. I leaned against it and cried while I knocked over and over, asking him to please let me out.
After a while, he banged on the door.
“I’M NOT LETTING YOU THE FUCK OUT UNTIL YOU UNDERSTAND AND ACTUALLY TRY! THIS DINNER WAS THE FIRST TIME YOU TRIED A DAMN THING! YOU ARE NOT LEAVING ME, ISLAH!”
I crawled over to the bed, lay down, and cried some more.
I should have known not to trust him.
I was starting to feel hopeless. I wanted to leave so bad and didn’t know what to do next.
I needed Love.
I wanted Love.
I knew Love was coming to get me… I just didn’t know how he was gonna find me, and that scared me.