Chapter 4 #2
I frowned. “You’re not going to get up on that ladder.”
“Of course I am. Penny works herself half to death on an easy day. I can’t let her do everything around here too.” She patted my shoulder again. “Don’t worry, when I was a kid, I wanted to be in the circus, so I got good at tightrope walking. I’ve got incredible balance.”
I squelched a grimace. I adored Nell, but she wobbled on her bony legs when she walked. “I’ve got it.” Before she could protest, I was on the ladder, tightening each of the nine bulbs in the room.
The lights stopped flickering.
“Aren’t you the one.” She stared up at the ceiling. “You’re hired. All I need is a new kitchen.”
“Maybe tomorrow.” I lowered my voice. “Hank was okay today?”
“You always ask me that with dread, but he’s great. He’s a sweet angel of a man.”
What did it say about me that I still didn’t quite believe the transformation, that I kept waiting for him to revert? Probably I didn’t want to know what it said. For now, it was a miracle. Actually, it was Nell who was the miracle, and I’d never stop being grateful.
“You’re a life saver, and I owe you big.”
She beamed. “You don’t. You already pay me way too much money.”
“It’s not enough. If you ever need anything, please just name it.”
She angled her head, eyes flashing interest. “Like…a favor?”
“Yes, like a favor.”
She stared at me for a long beat, the sweet little old lady gone, in her place a sharp negotiator. “Hmm,” she said.
Maybe I should’ve been worried, but what could she possibly want that I couldn’t provide? “Name it.”
She peeked out at Hank, who was still bent over a puzzle, then pulled me into the living room.
Damn. Maybe Hank had found his old personality after all and Nell was having trouble telling me. The doctor had assured us more than a few times that most likely this new Hank was here to stay, but I had never quite been able to believe it. If he’d hurt Nell’ s feelings, I’d?—
Hell. This was the crux of my mental torment. There’d never been any closure for me and my siblings’ childhood. No apologies, no talking things out, no nothing. The man we’d hated with every ounce of our being was gone.
And yet still here, torturing us in a new way.
Nell craned her neck, looking out the front bay window that gave us a view of the street.
“You waiting for someone?” I asked.
“Yes, so I’ve gotta make this quick.” She looked me right in the eyes, which probably gave her a neck cramp since she came up to my elbow.
“Listen,” she said. “You know my granddaughter. She’s got a heart of gold.
For years, she’s supported me from Seattle because the pay was much higher there.
But she lost her job when Covid hit, and became her own boss, selling ready-to-go meals that she home-cooked. Then she had to come home.”
She paused to clear her throat, like this was hard to talk about. “She deserves more than what life’s dealt her. She deserves a life that’s more than just heartache and hard times. She deserves fun . I want to help her there, hopefully with a little assist from you.”
Why did I suddenly know I wasn’t going to like this? “Assist?”
Once again, she took a quick peek out the window, then turned back to me. “Penny recently really went through something, something really hard…”
Aaaaaand she had my full attention.
“Her mom’s one of them free spirits,” Nell went on.
“Hard to tie her down. Six months ago, she took a job on a cruise ship without much notice. That’s why Penny gave up her life and came back to Star Falls.
She knew I’d need help with Wyatt. But something’s off.
She hasn’t spoken about it, but I can see it in her eyes.
She’s…not okay. She’s not the same happy-go-lucky girl she’s always been. ”
Worry filled me for this woman I barely knew and yet cared about on a level I didn’t quite understand. “You don’t know what’s wrong?”
“She won’t say, but it doesn’t matter, a grandma knows these things.” A flash of pain crossed her face. “I think she had…man trouble.”
Instantly, I thought of the bandage along Penny’s jaw, the one that had appeared a week ago, and how she’d flinched away from my touch. My stomach tightened as I read between the lines.
“Did that trouble follow her here?”
“No.” Her eyes darkened. “But something happened during her quick trip back to Seattle. She’s retreated into herself, even more than usual.” Nell’s mouth was tight. “She’s done so much for me, supporting me and Wyatt since she was a teen, always having our backs. It’s my turn to help her now.”
If there was one thing I understood, it was helping family. “What do you need from me?”
She drew a deep breath. “I think Penny’s problem is that she no longer trusts herself.
I think if she could have even a single night off, a night out with someone.
A certain someone who’d bring fun and laughter with no pressure…
” She met my gaze, hers hopeful. “Just one teeny tiny little night out.”
I understood where she was coming from, because we Colburns, for all that we gave each other shit, had each other’s backs.
Always. But this…this “little favor”…I couldn’t.
Not when I was attracted to Penny, far more than I wanted to be, if I was being honest. But I wasn’t in a place in my life to date.
I just wasn’t. And yet there was Nell, looking at me with such hope.
“Look,” I said gently, “Penny’s lovely and sweet—” Nell snorted, and I had to smile. “She is.” Well, sometimes. She was also sharp as a tack, funny as hell, feisty enough to keep me on toes, and effortlessly and cluelessly beautiful, all of which were incredibly sexy to me.
“She’s amazing.”
Nell nodded. “Now that I buy. So you’ll ask her out?”
I knew a date with Penny would be a lot of fun, but I couldn’t do that to either of us. “Nell, I can’t.”
Her smile faded. “Oh. Okay.”
“I’m sorry?—”
“No, I get it. Lots of people say they owe you a favor but have no intention of ever following through.”
Fuck me. Had I thought Nell a sweet, gentle, little old lady?
Because behind those rheumy blue eyes lay a sharp, laser-focused mind and she’d just walked me right into her trap.
I rubbed my jaw, desperate to come up with a good reason I couldn’t do this.
Even if I was stupid enough to agree, which I wasn’t, Penny would hate this. Hate me .
“I blame myself for what she’s going through, you know,” Nell said, looking out the window again.
“Her grandpa was a horse’s patoot, excuse my French.
And then Penny’s mom’s taste in men has always been lousy.
Poor Penny never had a chance of landing in a healthy relationship.
She wouldn’t know a good man if he stood right in front of her and set the world in the palm of her hand.
So really, it’s no wonder she got hurt. And now, she’s given up a personal life, stopped doing anything but working and supporting this family, but worst of all, she’s given up on love. ”
I’d heard nothing after “she got hurt.” Drawing a deep breath, I then let it out slowly. “Nell?—”
“She’ll never ask for help. She’ll just suck it up, go on less sleep and push herself too hard. She’s always been like that. She doesn’t want anyone to know when she struggles.”
I knew what that was like as well, more than I wanted to admit. It’d been my life too, always watching out, always the caregiver, never having the luxury of letting my guard down. And suddenly I wanted, with shocking, gripping, desperate intensity, to go find Penny and make sure she was okay.
Nell flashed a small smile, rounding the bases, coming in home with her closing argument.
“Now, do I also think Penny is amazing? Yes. Beyond. Does she additionally have an attitude problem? Also yes. But ,” she said earnestly, “under all that tough skin, she’s loyal and caring, and she’ll go to the end of the world for the people in her life. ”
I happened to love all of those traits, especially in Penny. But that didn’t mean this was a good idea. And yet…she’d been hurt. She’d retreated into herself. And Nell was worried enough to ask me for this favor.
“Shit.”
She patted my arm, smiling sweetly in her victory. “Thank you. I’ll never forget this.”
“You’ll never forget what?”
We both turned to find Penny in the kitchen doorway, having come in the back door.
She set three bags down on the kitchen table, but left her purse slung over her shoulder, like maybe she wasn’t staying.
Her eyes were narrowed in on me, honey-colored strands half in and half out of her ponytail, her shirt untucked, exhaustion revealing itself in the purple smudges beneath her eyes.
And I wanted to wrap her up tight in my arms.
In the past two years, I’d stayed out of relationships. Any encounters had been casual. I couldn’t even remember the last time I’d felt the urge to pull a woman in with the sole purpose of comforting her. But that’s what I wanted to do right now with Penny. Wrap her up and hold her tight.
“I’m a good boy,” Pika-boo announced to the house, apropos of nothing. “I’m the goodest of all good boys.”
“You are,” Penny said and pulled a cracker from one of the bags on the table, feeding it to the bird, who danced merrily on his tiny little feet in thanks.
Penny was watching me watch her. I could usually get a read on a person quickly, but this woman defied my talent.
Even so, I could’ve sworn her expression was both irritated at finding me here, but also a little excited.
Hell, maybe the excitement was the reason for the irritation.
She was attracted to me, but didn’t want to be attracted to me.
Join my club…
The scrape on her chin from nearly being run over by that delivery truck was fading. The bandage along her jaw was gone, in its wake an inch-long scar, fresh and shiny pink.
I had to draw a deep breath and force a lightness into my voice that I didn’t feel. “How’s it going?”
“It’s going.” She glanced at her grandma. “What’s going on? What won’t you forget?”
Nell gave me a look that said you see what I’m dealing with here? She turned to Penny. “Just going over Hank’s care. Nothing to worry about, honey. How was your day?”
Penny eyed us both for a minute. “Peachy.”
I fought a smile and lost because damn, she had me wrapped around her finger with that attitude.
And suddenly I knew two things with absolute clarity.
One, crazy as it seemed, she had the power to hurt me.
And two, I was pretty sure I had the power to hurt her as well.
Only she’d already been hurt, and I wouldn’t add to her pain.
“I brought dinner,” she told Nell.
“Do we have enough for two extra?”
Penny glanced at me again, pensive this time. Maybe even…worried. “Yes. But it’s probably what he’s been eating at his office all week, so I doubt he’d be interested.”
“He” was far more interested than he should be. But I knew how to read a room. “Thank you, but I’ve got to get Hank home. He’s got his weekly visit from his home-health nurse in a bit.”
Nell met my gaze, her own filled with gratitude.
A gratitude I did not deserve. This “teeny tiny night out” she wanted me to instigate would come back to bite me in the ass, I knew it.
Just as I knew I wasn’t going to say no.
I was going to do as she’d requested and ask out the first woman who’d fascinated me in way too long.
Me, the guy who hadn’t been able to access his emotions in an even longer time.
What could possibly go wrong? Only everything?