Epilogue
A week later
Standing at the door of our apartment now, it is strange to remember the days spent there. The way he cooked delicious dinners for us. The way he quoted my favourite author for me. How we prepared together for exams.
Danylo is most likely not in town, so I want to pick up some of my things and finally go to Lviv.
The pain subsided little by little, but the feelings remained. And they will remain forever. I keep scrolling through the same words in my head that I never had time to say to him.
I chose you, and I will choose you every day for the rest of my life. Every morning when the sun rises in the sky, and every evening when the moon takes its place. I will choose you, even when all the stars in the sky fade away, and I will have my last breath left to speak words that will be meant only for you. I love you my darling.
I try not to blame myself for what I did, I assure you that I did everything to make him happy, but it doesn't make it any easier.
I knock on the door just in case. There's no answer, so I pull out my apartment key and open the door.
A familiar smell hits my face, he was here just a few hours ago. The apartment is almost empty, there are no shoes in the hallway, no dishes in the kitchen, and only my things in the room.
They lie in the same places. He didn’t touch them. From this, another painful blow passes through my heart. I notice a large black suitcase by the bed and guess that Danylo is still packing his things.
He is still here.
I quickly go to the closet and start gathering my clothes. Among other things I notice a grey hoodie, his grey hoodie, I wore it all the time. Danylo left it for me. As a reminder.
I take all my things except that one hoodie, it doesn't belong to me. Not anymore.
I remember that I lost my watch somewhere, maybe it is here, so I go to the bedside table and sit on my tiptoes. I never opened the one on his side. The probability that the watch is there is small, but I still check and open it.
Unfortunately, there is no watch there, but I notice some tattered notebook and involuntarily pick it up.
It is of medium size, the date of manufacture is visible on the cover “2018”.
My heart sinks, I remind myself that I don't have the right to read it, I don't have the right to take other people's things in my hands, but I can't stop myself when I read the first lines.