Chapter Eight
ACE
Tense silence filled the cab of my truck on the drive home. Celine was curled into herself, her feet perched on the seat with her arms around her legs. Her pretty face was buried in her knees as she continued to quietly cry over her brother and everything he had gone through.
And because I had also kept secrets from her. But it wasn’t my shit to tell. I hated that it put a rift between us, but Ryan had vented to me because he felt like he had no one else to turn to. And I wouldn’t betray his trust like that. Besides, like him, some of the shit he told me… they weren’t ready for yet.
Every time I rested my hand on her thigh, she flinched away, a soft noise of discontent filling the silence. The fifteen-minute drive to our house felt eternal with my wife giving me the cold shoulder.
I hated this shit.
I should have told her years ago, but the thought of betraying my brother-in-law and best friend didn’t sit right with me. I knew a fight was coming the moment she called me. I could hear the betrayal in her voice, and a sick feeling twisted my gut with each passing minute that it took me to get to Ryan and Amber’s apartment.
There was a line of six cars at the entrance to our neighborhood. I spared a glance in her direction while we waited, the lamppost outside the truck illuminating her tear-streaked cheeks. I hated being part of the reason that she cried. All I ever wanted to do was make her happy.
I cleared my throat. “Princess?” She didn’t make a sound. With four more cars still in front of us, I leaned over and grabbed her hand. She didn’t flinch or pull away that time, but her cold hand was limp in mine. “I’m so sorry,” I apologized, meaning it from the depths of my soul. I’d been put in a damn hard place. I knew I shouldn’t have kept anything from Celine, but I couldn’t betray Ryan, not with something as huge as what he’d trusted me with.
I glared at the remaining two cars, struggling with the silence and my own betrayal of my wife. The minutes passed by slowly, until eventually, I parked in our driveway, turned the ignition off, and sank into my seat with a sigh, leaning my head back against the headrest as I closed my eyes.
Celine was quick to pull her hand from my tight grasp and reach for the door handle, but I quickly locked the doors and turned to her. I wasn’t letting her away from me until we sorted our shit out.
“Let me out, Ace.” Her voice was soft, barely a whisper that reached my ears.
“Talk to me, baby.” I reached for her over the center console, grabbing her wet cheeks in my palms and brushing away the remaining tears. Her eyes were big pools of blue, swimming in tears as she glared at me.
“I don’t know what to say to you!” Her voice was hoarse as she screamed at me, the sound bouncing off the cab walls, slightly hurting my ears.
“How can I fix this?” Fear twisted in the pit of my stomach, and my heart clenched at her look of defeat. I couldn’t lose her, and if I did, I didn’t care how much it would hurt Ryan, but I would hate him for putting me in this position for the rest of my fucking life.
“You can’t. You lied to me for years, for the entirety of our marriage, Ace! How am I supposed to know you haven’t been lying to me about other things? How am I supposed to trust you when you’ve been keeping a huge fucking secret about my brother for six years ?” Her chest rose and fell quickly, and her wild eyes remained fixed on me. Anger and betrayal consumed her whole being.
In a flash, she hit the unlock button and threw the door open, bolting for the front door before I could stop her. I was quick to follow though, locking the car with a high-pitch beep, and I chased after her. She was searching through her giant purse, cursing every time she lost her grasp on the house key.
“Let me?—”
“No, Asshole, I’ll do it myself!” she insisted, finally pulling her keys from her giant ass purse. It had been a long time since she called me Asshole. The nickname brought up old emotions, and I briefly wondered if she felt them, too. From the red tinging her cheeks, I could only assume that she hadn’t and that anger was still raging throughout her tiny body.
She tried to shove me out of her way with her shoulder, eyes set on the door, but I didn’t let her through. Grabbing her shoulders, I held her in place. The defiant woman turned her head so that I couldn’t see into her eyes. “Let me go, Ace.”
“Not until we fix this, princess.” Her head whipped in my direction, and her body went slack in my hands. She had always been powerless against that name.
The fight left her body as she studied me, and her beautiful, blue eyes that were filled with so much pain swept over my face. Her body shuddered with a sob before she leaned her head against my chest and cried. Loud, agonizing moans of pain left her body, tearing my soul in two at the knowledge that I did this to her. I caused her this much pain.
“H-h-how could you?” Her tears soaked through my shirt as her body quaked. I tightened my arms around her, burying my face in her hair, breathing in the scent that was purely her as I squeezed my eyes shut. “We’ve been married for five years, Asshole,” she wailed, clenching my shirt in her small fists. “Five years, Ace,” she whispered so softly, I had to strain my ears to hear her.
“I’m sorry, baby. I’m so sorry.” She shook her head against my chest, then pulled away from me. My hands immediately moved to her hips and held her to me so she couldn’t run away.
She lifted a trembling hand to swipe at her red, blotchy face, her angry eyes fixed on me. “Sorry isn’t good enough.”
“What do you want me to do?” I was desperate. Her body was vibrating under my hands. I feared if I let go of her hips, she’d sink to the ground. Big tears rolled down her cheeks as she fought to suck in a breath, her hands wiping at her face every few seconds. She sniffled as her eyes pierced me, and I fought the panic rising in my chest. “How can I fix this?” I begged her.
“I want to hurt you. I want to make you feel this crushing pain in my chest—this,” she paused, and her eyes glazed over as she continued, “betrayal.”
“Hit me. Make me feel it,” I begged her. I’d endure anything if it meant she didn’t hurt anymore. “Get all of your anger out, baby.” Her hands were still clenching my shirt, and they shook at my words. I slowly released my grip on her hips and took a step back, opening my arms and my body to her assault. She let go of my shirt and raised her fist, but then, she dropped it, opening her mouth and closing it a few times before shaking her head.
“I can’t hit you, Ace.” Dropping to my knees in front of her, I grabbed her legs.
“Make me feel your pain, baby.” I was pleading, desperate to fix this shit between us.
“I c-can’t,” she cried, her dainty hands covering her face as she shook her head, her body shaking so hard.
“Why not?”
“Because I fucking love you too much,” she whimpered, falling into me, her arms wrapping around my neck, her face burying into my shoulder. “Why didn’t you just tell me?” she cried.
“It wasn’t my secret to share. Ryan trusted me to keep it.” I ran my hand over her head, fingers tangling in her silky, blonde hair, trying my damnest to soothe her.
We sat there on our white, wooden porch for a long time. I watched our neighbor walk past with his dog, shooting us a puzzled look twice. Celine finally moved and looked at me with black-rimmed, swollen, bloodshot eyes.
“What else haven’t you told me, Ace?” My jaw went slack at her question. She had lost all of her trust in me, and fuck , it hurt.
“Nothing, princess. Nothing else.” I cradled her face with my one hand, my other hand gripping her hip, wiping away her tears with my thumb, feeling the sticky moisture beneath my fingers.
“Stop calling me that. It’s too confusing.” I couldn’t fight the grin at her admission that all was not lost.
“You’ll always be my princess, Celine.” She smiled into my hand and closed her eyes with a sigh.
“I am so mad at you for keeping this from me, for not letting me get him help,” she murmured, her eyes still closed, her breathing finally regulating and coming out in even little breaths.
“Your brother is just as stubborn as you are, and he didn’t want anyone to know and think he was weak. He had too much to prove; you know that.” I leaned my head against hers, kissing her nose.
“Can we go inside now? I’m so thirsty,” she whispered.
“Promise me that we will be okay.” Her brilliant, blue eyes locked on mine, and she nodded, tears still wetting her long lashes.
I helped her up, holding her cold hand in mine. I pulled her to the front door and picked up her forgotten keys from the ground to unlock the door. After twisting the knob and letting us into our little home that we bought and decorated together, she kicked off her sandals at the door and waited for me to do the same. I’m surprised she didn’t insist on putting them away in the organizer like she normally did, but at least her hand was still in mine as I closed and locked the front door behind us.
She gently tugged her hand from mine when we passed the bathroom in the entrance hall, and I waited outside as she cleaned herself up. She sniffled a few times, and then I heard the rush of tap water. She walked out, face red and clear of all her makeup, making her eyes look even more swollen.
She didn’t wait for me as she headed into the kitchen, where she poured herself a giant glass of water from the chrome fridge. She loudly gulped down the water, her eyes on me across the center island while I leaned against the wall, arms crossed over my chest, watching her as well.
She was thinking; I could see it in her calculating gaze. She’d thought of something else to yell at me about. Abandoning the now empty glass next to the sink, she walked over to me, and I braced myself for whatever the hell was about to come next.
“There is something you’ve never told me.”
“And what is that? Pray tell.” She glared at the smirk on my face before crossing her arms over her chest and widening her stance in defense.
“What happened all those years ago when you left me?” Never in my fucking wildest dreams did I think she would bring that nightmare up. “Wind knocked out of you, babe?” she whispered, taunting me.
“Why do you want to know now?” I asked her, hating how raw my voice was. “You never asked before.”
“What are you hiding from me, Ace?” There was a cunning glint in her eyes now. The strong woman I fell in love with was surfacing as she stood in front of me, prepared for battle.
“Do you really want to know about that year, or are you just trying to start shit?” She glared at me. “This is so unlike you. You know it was hell for me. You had to know that I went back to my abusive mother because I was told she had changed, and I needed to hear her apologize for how she treated me.” I uncrossed my arms and jabbed a finger into my chest. “You are the only person who knows what happened that day, and you ,” I pointed at her, my own anger rising to meet hers, “didn’t judge me. So, tell me why, after six years, you want to know what happened that year?” From the hurt look now playing across her features, I feared I might have overstepped.
“Because you never called or texted me after you left. I was heartbroken, and I wanted to know if you were, too,” she whispered, playing with a loose piece of hair, looking away from me.
“Of course, I was, Celine,” I said, a bit exasperated. How could I not be? I risked everything to be with her, even destroyed my friendship with Ryan. “I came back when Amber called me because I was madly in love with you, you silly woman.” Reaching forward, I pulled her into my arms, wanting to wash all of her insecurities away. She melted into my arms, her head on my chest as she wrapped her arms around my waist and squeezed in return.
“Sometimes, I just need reassurance,” she mumbled against my chest.
“I will always love you,” I promised her.
“I still believe it was an accident, and I know your brother has forgiven you, too.” My heart clenched at the thought of my baby brother, completely robbed of life because of one careless mistake.
“What can I do to fix this, princess? To make you trust me again?” There was an evil glint in her eyes when I pulled away. I frowned at her, a little concerned.
“Well, you could start with a bubble bath, then make me some pancakes for dinner, and then give me a foot rub while we watch Grease .”
“Lavender or rose scented?” I asked, my shoulders relaxing. I could handle those requests. The grin of pure delight that took over her features warmed my heart.
“Rose, please.”
Two hours later, we were sitting on the couch, her soft feet resting on my lap while I rubbed her toes and her arches, all the way up to her calves. She moaned as I massaged her calf muscles that were sore from standing all day at work for days on end.
“I forgive you,” she suddenly revealed, her eyes filled with love as she looked at me.
“I’m not done with you yet.” I winked, and she blushed, her blue eyes darkening with desire.
“I wanted to surprise you tonight with a special dinner, but that plan went to a ball of shit after today,” she murmured, sitting up straight on the couch.
“What’s so special about tonight?” I asked, honestly confused. A frown tugged down the corners of my lips, my hands stilling. She smiled, and her eyes sparkled in the dim lighting.
Fuck, she was so beautiful.
“I’m pregnant, Ace! We’re going to be parents!” she squealed.
It took a second for the words to truly settle in, but when they did, my eyes widened. I launched myself across the couch, my lips meeting hers as I dragged her to me. Her moan instantly reached my ears.
We were finally getting what we had been hoping for—a family.