Chapter Five #2
Anyway, I’m almost positive the old man would disown me if he knew what I have secretly always wondered about myself, but have never been able to act on: that I am attracted to only men and not just a bi-curious man, hiding his true desires away from the world.
Gannett would ridicule me to no end. Mom, I’m not sure what she’d think.
She rarely forms an opinion of her own, obedient to her husband to the core.
My son would regard me as nothing more than dog shit on his shoe.
He already hates me enough for getting back into the dating scene so soon after Miranda’s death.
He knows nothing of the divorce talk between Miranda and me, and he also doesn’t know that I’m only back in the dating scene because of Gan’s persistence and my unrelenting fear of letting my family down.
Never mind the fact that I’m an eternal fucking embarrassment to Colt already.
Imagine if word got out in our small town, if I—a Waters, practically Ternbay royalty—were to be seen ‘testing the waters’ with another man.
That’d be a scandal for sure. All hell would probably break loose, and that’s not a risk I’m willing to take. Not when it comes to my son.
“Yoo-hoo, cat got your tongue, hot stuff? I’ve been over here telling you all about myself, but you haven’t said a single thing.
” Kai’s words rip me out of my self-loathing.
He nods down at the spark plugs in my hand.
“Are those for Brooks’ rust bucket? God, that thing is such a piece of shit.
I keep telling him he needs to upgrade, but he doesn’t listen. ”
I nod, my molars grinding at the dig. Not even sure why, it’s not like this is even my vehicle, but I feel personally affronted at the not-so-subtle insult nonetheless.
Probably because the connection I made with Brooks during our back-and-forth emails left me with a feeling that Brooks is an all-around genuinely good guy—one who doesn’t deserve to be mocked like this.
“Ohh, okay, okay. Strong, silent type. I get that. You know what they say about still waters,” he hums.
“I’m afraid these ones are pretty shallow,” I reply dryly, lying to get him off my back. “Listen, if you don’t mind, I’m just going to replace these so I can be on my way.”
I continue to head for Brooks’ antiquated yet practical car, but Kai still can’t take a hint.
He trails along behind me, leaning on his hip against the headlight, arms crossed over his broad chest. He’s objectively attractive, I’ll give him that, but in a way that says he’s just another Trista-Lynn.
It looks like he prides himself on how he looks, and he’s just cocky enough to flaunt it shamelessly.
He probably takes those platypus-lipped selfies like she does, too.
Just stop! Stop it with those thoughts, Waters!
“You a mechanic?” Kai asks, quirking an eyebrow up at me.
“Sometimes,” I answer vaguely.
“Oh? So what do you do the other times?”
“Lobsterman,” I tell him.
Kai bites his lip and nods. “That explains the rugged good looks. Bet you don’t even go to the gym to get those muscles…” He actually has the audacity to reach out and grab at my bicep.
“I lift weights at home,” I reply dryly, shrugging him off.
That’s not totally the truth. It’s been a while since I’ve done anything with the dumbbells at home.
Besides stubbing my toe on them, that is.
Exhaustion, and not just at the physical level, sets in more and more often lately, and I can’t bring myself to pick one up.
Doing curls with a rocks glass, though, well that's another story altogether.
“Oooh, alright. What other kinds of workouts do you do at home?” he asks suggestively.
“I have a punching bag,” I tell him. “I’m decent with it, too,” I add, hoping he will take another hint to leave me alone or receive a decent right jab to the cheekbone.
No such luck.
“Fighting—much like other activities, if you know what I mean—can be good cardio! I practice Kajukenbo. Maybe you’d like to try me out on a mat sometime?” He waggles his eyebrows.
“Thanks, but I think I’ll pass.”
“Damn, mea wela. You’re a stone wall.”
“What did you just call me?” I ask him. Probably should not be inciting more conversation by asking, but curiosity got to me first.
“Hot stuff,” he replies. “I grew up in Hawaii, you know. I was telling you about it before…”
I roll my eyes. “I tuned you out.”
He scowls, acting affronted, like this is the first time someone’s ever said that to him before. It’s probably not the first time, but it may very well be the first time anyone’s openly admitted to it. “Well, that’s not very nice,” he huffs.
“Not here to be nice,” I tell him.
He gestures down at the car. “Then why are you helping Brooks?” he says Brooks’ name, like the sound of it leaves a sour taste on his tongue.
“Like him better than you,” I deadpan.
“Ouch!” he feigns a wound to the heart, but it only takes a second before he’s acting unperturbed again. “I think I can probably change your mind.”
“How do you say ‘go away’ in Hawaiian?”
“Not telling, because then you’ll tell me to do just that.”
And yet, once again, he doesn’t take a hint and do just that.
He hovers and watches me as I work on Brooks’ car.
Blatantly watching me, not the work.
I no sooner get the burnt out spark plug replaced and the car running, all in complete silence, when there’s a lone shriek that echoes out over the placid lake, quickly followed by several others.
I start running towards the commotion. The group is all gathered around the entrance of what appears to be a dining hall. Brooks is leading the charge armed with a push broom, like a jousting lance, pointed inside.
“Everyone stay calm!” he shouts over them. “You’re just going to scare it more!”
“Scare what?” I bellow over the commotion, and all eyes spin from the door to me. Everyone goes quiet.
“A raccoon must have gotten in here over the winter and taken up shelter,” Brooks sighs, still gripping the handle of the broom tightly.
“It could be rabid!” Petro offers, unhelpfully.
I grunt. “Well, why don’t you all get out of the way, so he doesn’t go on the offense?” I start to shoulder past the gaping teenagers and pull up beside Brooks. “Look at it, it’s just a baby. He probably just got in and couldn’t find a way back out,” I reassure them.
Seeing that the critter is obviously just spooked by all the racket, I shoo them off and prop open the double doors.
I join them further up the hill and watch as the young raccoon hesitantly peeks out before scampering out of the building.
He heads off towards the woods, in the opposite direction from the cabins or any other facilities—I surmise he’ll be too scared to try to repeat the offense.
When it appears the coast is clear, I go in and inspect the damage. Never having been here before, I’m not sure what sort of disarray the building was left in at the end of the season, but it’s clear the raccoon had its pick of potential entry places. The building itself could use some repairs.
“Fantastic,” Brooks groans sardonically, resting his hands on his hips and surveying the room with me. “Add this to the list of things we need to get done before the campers get here.”
“Shouldn’t this have been done before now?” Kai snarks, swaggering in next.
My jaw ticks at the barb. More precisely, the way Brooks' eyes flashed hurt at the question. Again, not sure why I’m taking personal offense to the statement, but I can’t seem to shake this feeling of protectiveness I feel for Brooks, though I barely know him.
“Been a little busy, Kai,” Brooks explains. “The end of the school year is always a lot of running around for Morgan and me. I don’t have the bandwidth to be a parent, ride-share, booster supporter, and play handyman at the same time, sorry.”
Remembering when Kai first showed up, he said something about keeping an eye on his investment. “Are you the other owner?” I ask him.
He nods. “I am, and I’m sticking around this summer to make sure that this place is even worth holding onto anymore.”
The hurt in Brooks’ eyes at that statement is now totally evident. My jaw clenches again, and I’m not sure why I’m even so invested in this. I came to drop Colt off. I should be nearly back in Ternbay right now, but here I am, feeling compelled, for some reason, to stay and help.
Probably because I know a fucking bully when I see one.
“You ever get your hands dirty around here, pretty boy?” I snap at Kai.
Brooks emits a choked sound beside me, but I’m too busy glaring eye daggers at Kai to look. Kai’s jaw drops. “I—uh—I… no, I just provide part of the funding,” he stammers.
I spin to Brooks. “You have any tools around here? Spare lumber?”
He nods. “In the maintenance shed.”
What I’m about to do next is surely going to piss Colt off, because he’d love for me to just up and leave, but I don’t give a shit.
I jut my chin at Kai and his sleek get-up. “I’d get changed, if I were you. Wouldn’t want you to get sawdust on those loafers of yours. You and I? We’re going to get this building battened down.”
Kai’s head swings over his shoulders, both ways, like he’s looking to see who else I could possibly be barking orders at.
When he spots no one, he presses one of his hands—which don’t look like they’ve ever swung a hammer before, by the way—to his chest. “Me? You want… me… to help you make repairs?”
“You just said you’re part owner,” I remind him. “Either help out, or keep your criticism to a minimum.”
Kai scowls at me, but out of my periphery, I see Brooks covering a smirk with his fist and his shoulders shake a little, like he’s holding back a full-blown laugh. Kai spins on the heels of his very expensive looking loafers, and stalks off—fists balled at his sides.
When I turn to face Brooks, he softly places his hand on my arm and looks me in the eyes.
Goosebumps erupt at the point of his touch, and I hope he isn’t observant enough to notice.
“Thank you,” he breathes out, grinning at me and giving me a glimpse of those dimples I saw earlier.
“My ex…he can be a little inconsiderate at times.”
His ex? Kai—that snaky shit—is Brooks’ ex?
That means Brooks is at least bi, then, since he has a daughter, right? Oh, man. I take a peek at Brooks’ ring finger and find it naked. Fuuuuck, the nervousness, the blushing, the oversharing—Brooks was flustered for a totally different reason than I thought...
Fuuuck. I shouldn’t have just signed myself up to stay here.
I should get far, far away. I was fine just admiring Brooks earlier, when I thought he was off limits.
This could lead me into dangerous water, if I stay.
But to see who I now know is Brooks’ ex treating him this way?
Who am I to leave now, when I promised him the help he so desperately needs?
Then, an unwarranted feeling of jealousy washes over me.
I have no stake in Brooks, but I can’t help but feel conflicted about why I’m practically green with envy right now.
Where does Kai get off on belittling Brooks like he has in the little time I’ve spent here, and why does Brooks just allow it?
“You really don’t have to stick around and help out, though,” Brooks adds. “I’ll figure out how to get it done somehow. Where there’s a will, there’s a way, and I’ve got many hands here now who can help me.”
I shake my head. “You got a place I can stay for the night?”
Brooks bites his lip, and his chin dips. His gaze falls to his feet. “I haven’t had time to get the staff cabin ready yet for the few who stay on-premises for the season. It’s a mess.”
“Doesn’t need to be pretty, I just need a place to stay the night,” I reassure him.
“Well, if you insist. I guess I could at least go make sure there aren’t any critters that are hiding out in there as well.
Come on, let me show you the way. And…” His emerald green eyes flick between mine, and I get the faintest sense that he’s letting go of some of his guardedness.
“Thank you, again, for what you did just now. Sticking up for me. And fixing my car. And for playing animal control officer…” he trails off, chuckling sheepishly.
“It’s no big deal,” I reply earnestly. Because it isn’t, truly. My secret aside, I am pretty handy. If he’s got the supplies already, it’s all easy work.
He fixes me with a look. “It is, though. It’s a big deal for me, anyway,” he says vaguely.
And it makes me wonder, why is that?