17. Blake
Blake
I keep going over in my head how the hell we even got here. Clint even came home from Brazil for the “family emergency” as my mother called it. Granted his level head has been needed to handle the damn media circus. Everyone’s on edge wondering what I am going to do next. I honestly don’t know what the fuck else I can do. The bastard is dead. I’ve thrown and broken all my dining chairs. Punched a hole through my wall. Threatened everyone I love to leave me the hell alone. Cussed out a handful of staff then had to bring donuts the next day to apologize. Now I am all alone in the chapel crying and begging for life and forgiveness. At this point, I should be thankful she is alive, but I need her to wake up. I need her to be her in all her essence. I need her to cuss me out, tell me I’m being a mutant or diva, then tell me she loves me.
It’s been six days in a drug induced coma. Tomorrow her doctor wants to start pulling her out of the coma. He said the swelling has gone down tremendously, and her vitals are looking great.
How anyone escaped that night unscathed besides Gage and Amity is unbeknownst to me. His blood from the shot to the head was splattered all over Amity. When he fell, he took her down with her, and by a miracle, only her shoulder landed on the gun, setting it off. It was a clean shot all the way through, not severing any major vessels. The worst was her head slamming against a rock, knocking her unconscious with instant swelling and bleeding. I can’t be thankful enough for the paramedics who were already at the scene ready to handle all outcomes. Though they did have to pry her from my arms, especially once they noted she was alive. Her pulse was faint, but one was there.
For six long painstaking days, I have been waiting. Sitting in this chapel when the nurses come in to clean her and change her bandages. Wondering if this is some penance I’m being given on the life I’ve led. Sure I whored around, but never hurt anyone. I’ve led a wholesome, honest career supported by family traditions. And when I say honest, I mean mostly because I am not above blackmailing some bastard to get my way. Sure I am pampered, a mother’s boy, and have high expectations, but I’ve also earned my place here. I help those in need, volunteer when I can, well since I met Amity, and strive to attend church at least one Sunday a month.
Surprisingly that crass girl I love so damn much has changed me for the better.
* * *
Two days have passed since they stopped the coma meds. We are now like floating ducks, paddling beneath the surface with anticipation. We have been able to catch several twitches and grasps of her hands since yesterday. I swear she even squeezed my hand last night when I laid my head on her bed to sleep. I’m ready for her to wake up so I can crawl in this bed and hold her close. Right now, her body has seemed so stiff, I would hate to hurt her because she’s unable to vocalize.
I’ve only been home twice just to shower and meet with my cleaning lady so she can get my apartment back in order for when I bring Amity home. We will be selling her apartment immediately once she is released. Tilly and Lana have been keeping Hamlet, and we have a plan to sneak him up here once Amity wakes up. I know she is going to want all of those big goofballs’ snuggles and kisses. I’ve even had Nash help me look at some properties out by him and Willa so we can move out of this apartment life. Have some property of our own to grow. I can always carpool to the office with Nash on days our schedules align. I also know Amity would love to be closer to the ranch. The only thing I am unsure of is her job at the college. I’m not sure what her expectations are or theirs. I know she loves teaching and is a huge asset to the program. My head has been swarming with ideas and what-ifs, I just need her to wake the hell up so we can make decisions.
The day has been wasted away with me sitting here, groveling to my girl to wake up, writing a travel list of all the places we are going to go, learning how to rope a cow via YouTube to impress her, which then put me on a thread of Amity's old rodeo competitions from college. I was even enlightened with the YouTube video of her riding an actual bull for eight seconds. No wonder the incident at the ranch gave her no distress, unlike me who thought she was going to be punctured with a horn and split in two. Then stomped all over until she was part of the soil. This daredevil unapologetically shameless woman I find myself infatuated with is going to be the near death of me, but I would never want to change her unyielding fire for life. Out of the corner of my eye, I spot movement then followed by groaning. I jump up, fling open the door, shout for a nurse, then rush back to Amity's side.
“Hey, princess, I’m right here. Take it easy.”