Chapter 25 #2
I’ve heard the horror stories about prison and how Black men came home different. They were never the same men that went in, which made sense. The system often sent boys into prison and then expected them to come home fixed.
There were some men that came home changed and ready for good. There were some who came out as overgrown boys. Boys who never had the chance to grow and experience life, so when they came home, they didn’t know any better.
Some feared the outside world and went right back. It was easier to be on the inside because you had a roof over your head and three meals a day. I didn’t know Goo before he went in, but I could promise he came out a changed man.
“It was the worst time of my life. Worried about him every single day.” She messed with a dish towel as she spoke about him.
“I bet.”
We both remained quiet until she tossed me a dish towel. “Beauty Queen, you’ll learn to cook today.”
I laughed, thinking she was joking and she was serious. “I…I don’t know how to cook.”
“You’ll learn today. You love a Jamaican man and don’t know the basics? Pass me that red onion.” She pointed to a basket sitting on top of the deep freezer. It had a bunch of different onions in it.
“I don’t see a red onion.”
“Der, girl.” She pointed to the purple onion that was in the basket.
I held the onion confused. “This is purple.”
“Lawd.” She chuckled and took the onion from me.
I watched as she easily chopped onions, peppers and everything she needed. “You like pear?”
“Avocado?”
“Pear.” She corrected me.
“Yes.”
I was confused why she was calling avocado a pear but went along with it. She found an old butter bowl in her cabinets and put some water for Bando and washed her hands and got back to cooking.
“You came to visit me, so you must love him a lot.” She spoke as she cooked with not a care in the world.
I could tell that cooking was her peace, because it brought me a sense of peace myself. All I was doing was handing her things and tossing things in the trash.
“I do love him… a lot,” I admitted, not feeling silly for admitting what I had already known for a long time.
Goo had shown me that he cared about me, and in Ashbourne, that he loved me. It was Aspen that really opened my eyes. All I had to do was ask him to come, and even then, I told him to forget it, and he still came.
He didn’t charter my brother’s jet or try to get my brother to help him get to me quicker. Goo went above and beyond and came to me on his own. He was a man that didn’t need my brother.
“Enough to convert for him?”
The conversation of me converting had come up in Ashbourne, and he said that he wasn’t forcing me to convert. “That’s a loaded question.”
“Loaded questions are for smooth talkers. Yuh a smooth talker because you are a lawyer.”
I smiled. “I am paid very well to be a smooth talker.”
“I hear dat.” She put the sauce from the pot on the back of her hand and tasted it. Once she got the flavors, she salted it again and closed the lid as it simmered on low.
“Are you Muslim?”
“No... I respect Goo’s decision to be Muslim, which is why I didn’t add pig tails in my red peas soup. Never know when he comes over.” She chuckled.
“A mother’s love.”
“And your mother?” Her question was innocent, but it knocked the wind out of me. She could tell the question triggered something inside of me, but she didn’t back down from the question. “Speak on it, guh.”
My eyes watered as I looked at her.
Ms. Sharon brought her chair closer to me and grabbed my hand. “She’s gone?”
“Yes.”
“Long time?”
“Since I was a child.”
She softly rubbed my hands, as she stared at me. Her hand rubs soothed me as she pursed her lips and wiped the tear that fell down my eyes. “A long time without a mother’s love, eh?”
“Yeah.” I sniffled and wiped my eyes.
She leaned forward and pulled me into her, and I allowed her. Her arms wrapped around me as she rocked softly.
“It’s alright, Baby… it’s alright. Relax… you not in a courtroom, you don’t need to be tense.”
My shoulders relaxed, as she held me. We sat in her kitchen as she rocked me slowly and didn’t say a thing. Tears wouldn’t stop coming down my face because I felt the same good energy I felt whenever Goo hugged me; he got it from his mother.
Their embrace made me feel complete.
As if none of the fucked-up shit in my life was happening. I finally relaxed my arms, and put my arms around her, as she kissed my cheek.
“He brings home a guh that doesn’t love hugs, and that’s all he loves.” She chuckled to herself, as she kissed the top of my head. “You come to me when you need a hug… I don’t care what time, you come, hear?”
“Yes, Ms. Sharon.”
“Sweet precious… always having to be the strength. Never getting to break, because who has time for that, right?”
“Right.”
“It’s okay to break at times. It reminds us tough girls that we are human and have feelings… the tears wash that rock exterior.”
I gently pulled back, and she wiped my face. “I feel like all I do is cry these days and I hate it.”
“Crying is good for the soul. Doesn’t make you weak, it makes you real.”
I smiled at her. “Thank you, Ms. Sharon.”
“You done cried in my kitchen, you bet to call me mommy. I don’t know where you and Goo stand, but I can tell that you will be my daughter-in-law. He has prayed for you, spoken about you so much that I feel like I know you.”
“Gerald has been thinking we’re going to be together since the first time we met.”
She raised her brow. “And here you are in my kitchen.”
“Touche.”
She swatted my knee and laughed. “Alright, we need to finish cooking because between two grown boys, you never know who comes home for dinner.”
Midway through us cooking and listening to Celine Dion, her housephone rang, and she rolled to grab the phone. “Cut up those peppers, while I talk to Maxine.”
While she went to talk in her bedroom, I continued to cut the peppers like she instructed. While cutting the onions, my phone started to ring, and I shuffled across the kitchen to my purse.
I smiled when I saw Goo’s name. “Hey.”
“You on my mom’s block, Boobie.”
“I am.”
“I’m twenty minutes away… I’m heading there now.”
“Okay.”
After I ended the call, I heard what sounded like a fall and quickly rushed to the backroom where I found Ms. Sharon out of her chair.
“Ms. Sharon, are you alright?”
“Dizzy, that is all… can you?” She reached, as I helped her up onto her side of the bed. It looked like she was trying to get onto her bed, but the chair moved back slightly and she miscalculated.
“Do you want to go to the hospital.”
“No… I have dizzy spells every now and again. I felt one coming on and tried to rush to the bed. Maxine always fusses at me for waiting too late.” She sighed, as she rubbed the side of her arm.
I was nervous.
“Are you sure? I have my car, and we can go to the emergency room, just so that you are checked out and everything is alright.”
She held my hand. “Keep an eye on the food and let me rest. I’m gonna take my medicine and take a rest.”
Even with how uneasy I was, I helped her lay back in her bed as she held my hand. “I will check on you in a bit. Goo is on his way here too.”
I cracked the door closed and went back into the kitchen. Bando was on his back knocked out on the carpet. You would have thought the dog didn’t have a very expensive bed at home with the way he was snoring.
I wasn’t such a heavy believer in God, or whoever everyone worshipped. I stopped believing for a while because I didn’t think he cared much for me or my siblings. All we had gone through, it was impossible for someone to care when you put them through hell.
Today, I felt this intense feeling to come visit Ms. Sharon. It was so weird because when I met her before, I was nervous. I figured the worst she could do was close the door in my face, or stare at me confused on why I came.
Maybe Allah was the reason I came today. The reason I had been here when she fell. What if I didn’t come? She would have been home alone today. There was no guarantee that Goo or Khaos would have come over today.
The lock turned and the door opened and my baby walked through the entryway. He wore an Inferno God biker jacket, jeans, and a pair of timbs. He had a Yankee fitted on his head.
“Hey, Goo.” I smiled.
Bando’s thirsty ass had already flipped over and was ready for him to pet him. “What up, killa… heard you was ready for skin.” He rubbed him, patting his butt like he loved.
When he was done with Bando, he shook his jacket off and stood in front of me, bending down until he was in my face.
“He touched you?”
“Lifted his hand, but he didn’t touch me.” I replied.
He nodded his head, then kissed my lips, and pulled me out the chair. Wrapping his arms around me, I melted into his big arms “I hope it’s okay that I came over here to talk to your mom.”
“Not tripping on that… tell me something, Boobie. Got a call that nigga was in the store with you… I start seeing red.”
I rubbed his face. “Sorry. I went to get chips and soda.”
He wrapped his hand around my neck, sucking on my lips as he shoved his tongue down my throat. The one thing I realized about Gerald was that he was a kisser.
Not a regular peck on the lips kiss either.
That man swapped spit, tossed his tongue down your throat, and held your face or neck while he did it. I felt guilty for being so wet in his mama’s kitchen, after she just consoled me.
He pulled back and kissed on my neck. “Where’s my moms?”
“She felt dizzy and fell transferring to her bed and wanted to nap… we cooked. You hungry?”
Once he heard she fell, he wasn’t trying to hear shit else. He went to the back where her room was and poked his head into her room. Like she said, she was resting peacefully.
He came back into the kitchen. “She so bull headed.”
“Does she have an aid?”
“Yeah, but she sends them home early thinking she can do everything alone. Been wanting to move her off this block and she refuses.”
“Sit… let me make you some food.”