Chapter 1 #2
“They see a pretty face and think I’m some pushover. I’m rational until I’m not. And your ass ain’t no better, so what are you really saying?”
“You know what I mean, Arie. We got too much shit going on to be going down for a murder charge. You know Papa Lo taught us better than that.”
“He also suited us up with a team of sharks that’s going to fight on our behalf. I’m unbothered about getting caught. If I have to choose between my respect and jail, I’m always going to choose the former.”
“Just stay smart, sis. That’s all I’m saying.”
“Always been that. And when I’m not, I always have you.”
She smirked and shook her head.
Paige had been my best friend since sixth grade.
She lived a couple of houses down from me, and we always walked to school together.
Our parents were tight, and we would always have sleepovers and do everything together.
At the age of fourteen, Paige’s house caught on fire, killing her parents and little brother, Joseph.
The police ruled it as some wiring issue, but we knew better than that.
Paige’s father, Joe, was in the same business as my father, so we suspected foul play.
The only reason Paige survived the incident was because she was at my house at the time.
It was a tragic day for everyone. I remembered holding her close as she cried in my arms. No one came to claim my good friend, so my parents took her in, and I gained a sister in return.
It was hard for the first year. We ended up moving to get away from the memories of her losing her family.
After some time had passed, my father began to teach us how to hustle.
We were high schoolers and wanted all the flyest shit.
He and my mother always got us whatever we wanted, but my father was a man who lived by the motto, “If you don’t work, you don’t eat. ”
I always thought that applied to men, but he let me know quickly that it applied to everyone. He would tell us that if we wanted the latest attire, we had to work for it, and he’d match whatever we earned. So, that’s when our lives began to change.
My daddy was a member of the Assassins Association, or AA, where all the elite hitters were born.
Once your name came across their radar, your life was on a countdown.
Lorenzo started young, and worked his way up to become one of the top hitters and drug suppliers in the city.
He never wanted us dependent on anybody, not even him and my mother, so he had us running packages for him.
Our pay was $500 every week. Sabrina was against it, but she could do nothing because whatever Lorenzo said was law.
I wasn’t the heartless bitch people made me out to be, but after Lorenzo went down for intent to distribute a hundred kilos of heroin and was currently serving his time upstate, something inside of me switched.
I didn’t care about shit but my mother, Paige, my uncle and aunt, and my cousin Lena.
Everyone else was only used as a means to an end.
I had sex without feelings, moved without a conscience, and had zero tolerance for bullshit.
My father raised Paige and me to be independent businesswomen and boss-ass sharpshooters.
He trained us day in and day out on how to eliminate our enemies and clean up any mess that we made.
We were like ghosts. No one knew who we were or when we were coming.
They just knew once we did, it was over for them.
For a long time, it was just Paige and me until we met Mayani and Megan our first year of college. They were twin sisters who had moved to Michigan from Ohio to go to Baker for school. From their backstory, I could tell they had it hard coming up.
One day, while Paige and I were at the mall, we saw them going off on a salesclerk and the security guard in the Gucci store.
They were being accused of stealing, which wasn’t uncommon because the workers there were racist anyway.
At first, I was going to keep walking, but Mayani’s mouth was what caught my attention.
When I saw Megan discreetly pull a switchblade from her pocket, I politely intervened.
“Girl, I was wondering where y’all went. What’s going on?” I asked, sliding next to Megan, signaling with my eyes for her to chill. She looked at me confused but put the switchblade away.
“These racist motherfuckas wanna claim we’re stealing when they clearly saw us pay for our shit at the counter,” Mayani said, rolling her eyes with much sass.
“Ma’am, I saw you place the watch on the display into your bag on the way out,” the sales rep said.
“We just want you to open the bag to make sure, ma’am. You’re making yourself look guilty by doing all of this yelling,” the security guard countered. He was right, but fuck him.
“Let him search the bag, sis,” I told her, taking it from her hand and handing it over to him. He opened it and pulled out the watch that clearly wasn’t boxed or bagged.
“I’m going to have to alert the authorities. Please come with me,” he said, reaching out for Mayani. She snatched away as I stepped in between them.
“That won’t be necessary. I’ll pay for it.
” I went inside my bag, pulling out a wad of cash.
The salesclerk looked at me suspiciously but went behind the counter to box and bag the item as I peeled off twenty-one hundred-dollar bills and handed them to her.
She handed me the bag as we all left the store and headed out of the mall.
I didn’t speak to them as Paige and I walked to my car. I handed Mayani the bag as she smiled.
“Hey, thanks for doing ? —”
“Don’t thank me, baby. Thank God you ran into a bitch like me. What the fuck would possess y’all to steal out of a high-end Gucci store?” I asked.
“It’s a dope-ass party tonight, and a lot of ballers are going to be in attendance. We gotta look the part to snag one of their asses to keep us in school,” Megan said. Paige and I looked at one another and laughed.
“What the fuck is so funny?” Mayani asked, clearly offended. My laughter instantly ceased as I stared at her.
“These snooty-ass bitches take us for a joke or something, Sis.” I saw Megan reaching for her blade. When she realized it wasn’t in the pocket she had it in, she swallowed as I pulled it from my pocket. Paige’s pistol was pointed at Mayani’s head before she could try anything.
“Watch your tongue, baby girl, before I cut it out of your mouth,” I said, staring into her eyes.
“And, yes, we do take y’all for a joke. I won’t lie about that, but I’m in a good mood today, so I’m going to be nice.
You have two options: Either go to that little party and fuck a baller for a few weeks for some cash before he dismisses you, or y’all can come work for me, and make your own money.
Choose wisely, though, because I don’t extend this courtesy often. ”
“W-What we gotta do?” Megan stuttered. I smiled, handing her back the blade.
“Give my sis your number, and I’ll be in touch,” I replied, popping the trunk to my car. I set my bags inside, then turned, handing Megan an identical Gucci watch as her sister. Her eyes ballooned as she looked up at me.
“I don’t steal. I don’t have a reason to. But I did it to show y’all how it’s done.” I smirked.
“How the fuck did you do that?” Mayani asked.
“I did it,” Paige said, lowering her gun. “While my good sis was solving y’all’s little problem, I snagged three of them from the display. We probably should get out of here before we all be in the county.” Mayani put her number in Paige’s phone, then handed it back.
“ Be waiting for my call,” I told her. Paige and I got inside my car and left them standing there speechless.
A few days later, I called them and gave them a job as my official security.
Since I was selling anything I could get my hands on, a lot of people—mostly men—tried to take me down, so I needed someone other than my bestie to watch my back at all times.
I trained Mayani and Megan the same way my father trained us.
Ten years later, they were still working as my bodyguards.
I didn’t trust many people, so those three had been the only people in my circle who knew how I was coming about my respect and the people I loved.
It was fucked up that I had to keep proving to these crazy people that I wasn’t to be fucked with, but it was their funeral, not mine.
Sabrina stood in the doorway with her arms folded and a mean mug on her face. I cautiously approached her with a guilty smile.
“Hey, Mommy. I missed your face,” I told her, kissing her cheek and wrapping my arms around her.
“You are so lucky you are my child, or I promise I would curse your ass out.” She wrapped her arms around me and kissed my forehead. “I missed your face, too, Amour,” she said, cupping my face. “Get out of that truck, Paige! I don’t know why you hiding!” she yelled.
Paige got out of the truck and rushed up the walkway. “I wasn’t hiding, Mama ’Brina. I just have to pee really bad!”
“Mmhm,” my mom mumbled as Paige hurriedly kissed her cheek and rushed inside. That bitch was lying. She just didn’t want to get cussed out. “Come on in here. Since you didn’t go pick up my stuff, you and that Paige are going to help me set up.”
“I don’t know why you always throwing a party, Mommy. You need company that bad?”
“It’s not about me needing company, Arieana. I just like to have fun. Besides, my best friend is locked up for fifteen more years. I have to do something, or I’ll lose my mind.”
“I know... ” I faltered.
She closed the door and looked at me. “Hey, we’ve gone ten years without him. What’s fifteen more? No need to feel solemn for things we can’t change.”
“I miss him,” I declared.
“Not more than I do, baby. Do you know he told me to move on the other day?”
I frowned. “What does that mean? What did he mean by that?” I asked her. Hearing that baffled me to the point where I was asking the same question two different ways.
“You know what he meant. I cussed his ass out so bad that I gave myself a headache.”
“And then what did he say?”
She paused from taking the decorations from the box and looked at me with sad eyes.
“That a lot of people are trying to get him to spend more time behind bars, so he doubts that he’ll be getting out after his fifteen years are up.
He doesn’t want me waiting for him anymore because he has no doubt that he’s going to kill someone in there.
” A tear slid down her cheek as I swiped it away.
That didn’t sound like my father. My father would never give up on his family—especially his wife.
I didn’t like hearing this or seeing my mother this way.
She was strong and brilliant, but when it came to Lorenzo Logan, she was fragile.
I wasn’t looking for love and would probably never get it.
It was “fuck these niggas” for me. But Sabrina and Lorenzo definitely showed me the meaning of true love and ultimately showed me that being in love gets you hurt some way or another.
I would never give my heart away for a man to make me hurt or make me lonely.
I loved my dad, and as smart as he was, he didn’t play the family card smart enough.
I begged him to let me take over, but he told me the drug life was not for me.
He didn’t believe in me or trust that I could handle the drug side of the business, and now, he was doing fifteen years with a possibility of parole after his fifteen years were up.
I wouldn’t have gotten caught because I was too smart with my moves. He taught me the game, but somehow, he didn’t follow his own lessons.
“Don’t worry about it, Mommy. I’m going to talk to him.”
“Just let it rest, Amour. I’ll be fine. I’ve been enjoying throwing these parties so that I can have something to do. I also need you and Paige to do something for me... ” Her voice trailed as she stared at me.
“What’s that?” Paige queried, coming into the living room with us.
“Get out of the life. You both see how it claimed Lorenzo. I can’t fathom the thought of losing you both too. You both have legitimate businesses that are thriving. What are you gaining by doing what you all do now?”
“What exactly do we do, Mother?” I asked her. Sabrina didn’t know what my dad had us doing, and I tried to make sure she never would. However, my mother wasn’t stupid. I knew she knew something.
“As much as you go around screaming for people not to… how do you say it? ‘Play in your face.’ Please do not sit here and play in mine. You and Paige swear y’all keeping secrets when I know every damn thing. I just choose to play dumb to the shit.”
“The less you know, the better, Mommy.”
“Well, too bad. I know more than you think I do. Lorenzo and I have been together for over twenty-five years. The more he tried to keep shit from me, the more I found out.
“You don’t think I know your uncle Lamont got y’all out here doing contracted hits on people?
Lamont took over, and your daddy made sure to tell him to look after you both and keep y’all safe.
Eva and I talk every day, and she sees you way more than I do.
You two are all I have left. Don’t allow these streets to take y’all away from me too. ”
I looked over at Paige as she shrugged. I knew Paige would ride at dawn any time I needed her.
She was leaving the decision up to me, as she always did, since we started taking those phone calls.
I loved my mother and would do anything for her, but I wasn’t ready to end this just yet.
I had a goal to reach, and I wasn’t there yet to call it quits.
“I hear you, Mommy. Let’s just get your party together, and I’ll go over our exit plan with you later, okay?”
She sighed. “Okay, Amour. And y’all asses are staying for the party until it’s over. The streets can wait for today. Just give me a day of your time.”
I smiled. “I’ll give you a lifetime.”