Chapter 15
fifteen
Hostile Healings
Jim
I’m having a hard time opening my eyes. My head feels light. I hear mumbling, whispers. Who’s here? Where is here? I heard several statements, but nothing made sense.
“He is going to be out of commission for at least two weeks.”
“I’m not leaving.”
“Me, neither.”
“Only one of you can stay.
“Let’s go, I need to get back to handle some things, and I can’t have him down there at the moment anyway.”
Who is going to be out of commission? Who is here? Ugh, I’m so tired. Maybe if I…
I startled awake from a dream. Charlie and I were holding hands, walking down the street in the city. With a little boy holding my other hand and a little girl being held by Charlie.
Where did that ridiculous fantasy come from?
That’s when I noticed Charlie was in a chair next to me, head laying on his arms, asleep. He was wearing ill-fitting clothes that were clearly not his.
Ummmmmm.
I looked around the small space that was curtained off. I was in a communal hospital ward. Only a small trash can and the chair Charlie was sitting in. I heard voices and movement all around us on the other side of the curtain.
What happened?
My head was a little floaty. I could probably go back to sleep.
I went to shift to a different position but strained in pain, and sucked air through my teeth.
I was propped up by a pillow wedged under me to help keep me more on my right side.
That’s when the memory of down in the mine came back to me.
But the noise and me jolting woke Charlie and his head shot up. “You’re awake.”
I grunted in a grimace.
Charlie went to touch my hand but pulled back, looking around our fabric enclosed space. Looking back at me with worry in his eyes, he stood up to move around my bed, “Let me go get someone. Tell them you are awake.”
“What happened?” My voice came out like I swallowed straight chunks of coal.
The question froze Charlie still standing at the foot of the bed, his posture collapsing on itself. Tears filled his eyes, but not overflowing. His mouth opened and closed a couple times like he was trying to get out the answer, but either was stuck in his throat or kept changing his mind.
“Charlie, come here please,” I reached out my left hand since I’m leaning against my right. But when I over extended, more pain shot through me from my back. I sucked in air again. Charlie rushed over and took my hand in his, but not to hold it. He put it back down on the bed.
“I’m so sorry, Jim.” He looked beside himself. “You are here because of me. Because I didn’t listen to the warnings you and others gave me.” A single tear slipped out.
“Sit down Charlie, you are shaking. Take a couple breaths,” I tried to calm him down, trying to express with my eyes and face that it’s okay, but I didn’t think it was coming across correctly with whatever drugs they gave me and the pain I was feeling.
I opened my palm to him instead because he seemed to calm better when he’s touching someone.
Or at least that worked after we left the bar, at the restaurant, and when we were in the mine car.
After taking my fingers in his, he took a couple breaths, his eyes staying closed like he couldn’t look at me when he said, “I got you stabbed.”
Okay. Well, that explains the pain.
But when did that happen?
Even though it’s fuzzy, I remembered the verbal confrontation with Richard and Dan before Charlie shot his mouth off and Richard charging and me jumping in front of Charlie, but I didn’t ever remember seeing a knife at any point.
My face must have looked like I was angry from me concentrating on the events replaying in my mind, because Charlie started to get worked up again.
He broke contact and stood up, “I’m so sorry.
This shouldn’t have happened. I probably shouldn’t be here as I’m sure I’m the last person you’d ever want to see. ”
As he was heading for the opening in the curtain, a woman walked through wearing a light blue button-down, short sleeve blouse with a white overall skirt over it and a little white cap pinned in her up-do hair style, almost right into Charlie. He skirted to a stop to avoid hitting her.
“Oh good, you’re awake.,” when she saw me, but kept looking at Charlie with an uncomfortable eye. “I’m Nancy, one of the nurses in this ward. How are you feeling? How is your pain? I can get you something more if you need it since your sedative has probably worn off.”
“I’m okay for now, but I would like to know what happened,” I stated since I haven’t gotten my answer yet from Charlie.
She eyed Charlie again, probably noticing his anguish and the tears, “You came in with a stab wound in your lower back on the left side. We were told it happened in the mine, but that was it. The doctor can fill you in on how he treated you when he makes his rounds shortly. Is there anything I can get you?”
Yeah, for her to leave but all of a sudden, I became thirsty, so I asked for some water. When she left, I motioned for Charlie to sit. After a false start, he came around and sat back down. Nancy came back and left a glass of water for me.
After she left again, I looked at Charlie and reached my hand out again, which he willingly took. Maybe it’s me that needed his comfort. I kissed his knuckles before saying, “It’s okay, Charlie. I’m not mad, but will you please tell me what happened?”
He told me the events of the incident, with fear and hesitation in his voice still.
Most of the fuzzy details in my head I knew.
I got stabbed when I was on top of Charlie, but no one realized until after.
We also assume it was Richard. They rushed me here as fast as they could while I was profusely bleeding through my jumper.
Then it hit me, “You came with me?” I was in awe but also left me in a bit of a stupor.
“I couldn’t leave you. My dad tried stopping me, but I couldn’t just wait by without knowing,” he paused and squeezed my hand. “Tom, David and I brought you. They went back to the mine, but I refused to leave. I couldn’t. David isn’t to please with me, and rightly so.
“He’ll get over it.” I would make sure of that.
That’s when the curtain parted and Mike barged in.
He was in normal clothes and looked none too pleased either.
Of course, the first thing he zeroed in on was our hands touching because we barely had time to react.
He aggressively whispered, “Let go of each other, we are in public. Are you out of your god damn minds?” I could see the heat radiating off him like gas from a toxic spill.
Our fingers broke contact and I instantly missed Charlie’s warmth in this cold environment.
Mike stood standing like a statue, with a glare that would have put me in this bed if I wasn’t already in it.
That’s when I noticed the book in his hands.
He saw me look at it and he tossed it on the foot of the bed in Charlie’s direction.
“First of all, do you know how many trolley’s it took me to get here and how much it cost! ”
“Mike,” I tried to come across as stern but anything compared to him right now was just meek. Especially in my condition.
“Don’t,” he clipped at me. “This is between me and my kid.”
“No, it’s not,” I shot back, “You are in my hospital ward. So, it involves me. And stop calling him that. He has stated he doesn’t like it, and we should respect his wishes.”
“Fine, you want to be involved,” looking between the two of us.
“You both are being careless. And beyond foolish.” He looked at Charlie, “You left that DOWN. IN. THE. MINE.,” pointing at the book.
“What were you thinking bringing that there where others could possibly have found it? And YOU,” turning to me, “What were you thinking giving it to him?”
Okay, that was pretty stupid of Charlie, giving him a little side-eye with pursed lips but Mike was overreacting a bit.
I went to answer but Mike seemed to be on a roll and barely stopped to breathe, looking back at Charlie.
“And you, refusing to leave when Tom left and staying here. How do you think that looks? How were you going to get back? Huh?”
Throughout his rant, he slowly got louder. Charlie sat there stiff as a board. Before I could come to his and our defense, which I was still trying to come up with, Nancy walked in. “What is all the racket and who are you,” she asked startled. “How did you get back here?”
Well, there was our out. “He was just leaving.” I plainly stated not wanting to come across that Mike’s outburst was affecting me any, but also knowing that just made what Mike thought of me way worse.
But at that moment, I didn’t care. He was upsetting Charlie more than he always was and I was already having a hard time smoothing out his worries.
“Maybe it was time for ALL of your visitors to leave,” Nancy ordered.
“What? No,” Charlie spoke for the first time since Mike arrived.
“No, Charlie can stay if he wants,” not wanting him to go with his father. Not that I feared he would physically hurt him, but he is already a mess, and Mike wouldn’t be any help for him right now.
Nancy put her hands on her hips. Mike glared at us then swished out of the curtain without another word, almost certain if he had gone any harder, he would have been ripped down.
Nancy stood there eyeing us. “No more outbursts,” she said with authority.
Then her eyes softened looking between us.
“I will try to keep others at bay and warn you when the doctor arrives,” giving us a knowing smile before walking out.
I closed my eyes, needing a moment after all that, but without looking, I grabbed for Charlie’s hand again, for an anchor to weigh me down. I needed him just as much as he needed me.
How did this happen to me?
I was fine alone. I was surviving. How had we gotten here? And so fast too. Not that here was anywhere at the moment, but I felt like where we were now compared to Sunday was five big steps forward, when it should have been a half step at most.