Chapter 18
eighteen
Shield And Protect
Charlie
Jim didn’t have much, but I had already assumed that even before he gave me his wallet to go shopping.
But I found a red and white can of Campbell’s Tomato Soup mixed in with some canned vegetables and a loaf of Wonder Bread sitting out.
Exploring the icebox fridge, I found an opened eight-pack of Kraft Cheese that had three loose slices left and a half-used stick of Blue Bonnet Butter.
The bread was a little stale, but I hoped after I toasted it, it wouldn’t be noticeable.
I could run to the store tomorrow as I was too tired to do much more today after the events of yesterday, today, and from not sleeping much.
I found Jim’s single pot and single skillet he owned in the cabinet next to the stove.
I moved his stovetop coffee kettle to the side and heated the soup while I made two cheese sandwiches, rubbing the end of the butter on the skillet before tossing bread slices on to toast. I put two slices of cheese for Jim’s and the other with a single for me since he needed the substance more than I did.
I bowled up the soup, placing a spoon in the contents and plated his cheese sandwich, cutting it into two triangles.
Making my way upstairs, I found him reading his book that I left within reach.
When he looked up, he had a look of surprise.
“Oh wow,” setting his book down and out of the way.
I put the plate on the bed and handed him the bowl so the contents wouldn’t spill.
He was about to dig in when he noticed I was empty handed.
His smile dropped a little, “Did you not make yourself anything, Honey?”
Hearing him call me that sends this current through me causing me to smile, “I did, it’s waiting for me in the kitchen. Plus, I need to clean up. Eat. We need to get you healed, and you starving isn’t going to help that process,” I turned to leave and go deal with the kitchen.
“Please get your food and come back. The kitchen can wait,” Jim pleaded. I turned my head and his face said everything I needed to know. He wanted me close.
I walked the three steps to him and kissed his forehead. I nodded with a shy smile, “Okay. I’ll be right back.”
I ran down and put away the butter and sealed the bread, grabbed my meal and ran back upstairs to join the man I was having a hard time staying away from. I think if he asked me to sit with him at the base of a volcano with lava flowing down it, I would.
I sat with him and we ate in silence for a moment. He kept looking at me with sincere happiness, dipping his sandwich in his soup before taking a big bite. Before I knew it, he was done and I had only eaten half of mine.
I took his dishes away and set them on the nightstand for now. When I went to continue, he asked, “Did you find any good reading material in the spare room?”
I smiled at him with the memory of walking into that room and seeing all the books he had collected over time. It was amazing, even though they were just lined up on the floor along the wall or in stacks at the foot of the spare bed that was left in there.
They were also in phenomenal condition, like he bought them and set them aside, never touching them again.
Showed that he respects books. It also showed the intelligence of the reader by how they treat books.
“I may have reorganized my selections into their own stack of books,” I smirked. I felt my cheeks heat.
“Good. They should be loved again,” he reached out with one hand to touch one of mine while the other reached up to brush my brow and down the side of my eye.
“Especially by these hands and these diamond blue eyes.” He was staring intently at my eyes, like I had caught him doing so many times before.
I knew my eyes were an oddly colored blue.
They’re not normal, an extra light sky blue, nearly crystal.
I reached up and grabbed his hand that’s on my face and held it there, leaning into it, closing my eyes at the comfort.
After a moment, I felt him try to pull away.
I opened my eyes to look at him again, “Finish. You can’t take care of me as my personal nurse if you don’t have the energy,” bouncing his brows suggestively making us both laugh, then he groaned, with a pinched face. “Did that one to myself.”
I shook my head and finished eating, took our plates and bowls back down to the kitchen and quickly cleaned everything up.
After locking the door to other unexpected visitors, I returned to Jim with two glasses of water and my book in hand.
I crawled back into bed with him where we stayed to read for the rest of the evening, both of us finishing our novels.
We talked about ‘The Charioteer’ since we both have read it now. The story of two men, in the middle of a war, falling in love in a time and place that made it dangerous for them was heart wrenching. And the bravery of the author for even putting it on paper really struck a chord with me.
“How was yours,” I asked, pointing at the book that was set aside.
He handed it to me, “Why don’t you tell me tomorrow? I have a feeling you won’t be able to put this one down either.” I smiled at him and moved to get off the bed. “Where are you going?” He looked confused.
“I was going to move into the other room where I am all set up,” I stood there, shifting back and forth, full of awkward energy.
“Okay. You can if you want. But if you would like to stay here with me, I would like you to,” looking at me with hope but also clear understanding that if I chose to go to the other room, he would respect it.
“Yeah. Okay. I, ah,” stammering trying to get my weariful thoughts out of my mouth.
“Charlie, Honey, it’s okay if you are not ready yet,” Jim said sincerely.
“No, umm, it’s not that. I mean, it is a little.
” I took a breath to recenter myself. “I have never slept with someone else in the same bed before other than my parents when I was little. But, I ah… I don’t want to hurt you,” whispering.
I knew I was blushing a pale red. “I tend to be a tornado in my sleep.”
Jim reached his hand out, so I gave him mine and he kissed my knuckles, one at a time.
“I’m not worried. I would like for you to stay with me, but only if you want to,” giving my hand one final kiss, this time the center of my palm, like it would help convince me to stay.
It wasn’t needed. I nodded and told him I’d be right back.
I went to change into my multi-blue striped pajama set.
I stopped in the bathroom to brush my teeth and pee.
While there, I found his robe, so I grabbed it and headed back to his room where he was lying where I left him.
He couldn’t take his eyes off me. I tossed his robe on the foot of the bed which distracted him.
I looked in his open closet and found a neatly organized wardrobe hanging there.
“Do you have a preference in sleepwear, Jimmy,” I asked over my shoulder.
He licked his bottom lip and sucked it in, eyes intense, “Yes. Naked.” Making me spin around, my eyes blowing wide, which in turn made him laugh out loud, then groaning from discomfort again.
“I’m just joshin’ you, Honey,” giggling again and rolling his eyes before he added, “sort of. But it really doesn’t matter.
Just not the white set, just in case I bleed in the night, yeah? ”
I grabbed a dark grey set. I turned and walked to him and just stood there not knowing how to do this or help. I’ve only ever seen one person naked before and it was Jim’s best friend yesterday, let alone touching someone in a state of undress.
I could feel my breathing start to escalate.
“Charlie!”
“Huh?” I looked up at Jim. He had a concerned look on his face.
“I said your name three times. Where did you go? Are you okay, Honey?”
“Yes, sorry. Um… I, ah, was trying to think how to do this,” going to toss the pajama set down with his robe, swinging it away, but changing my mind and pulled it close again, like I needed it for a shield.
“Are you flipping your lid because you are about to help me undress?” He gave me a teasing smirk, the asshole. “Because by the looks of it, you are excited.”
I gave him a confused look, then I saw him glancing down my body. When I looked, my pants were standing out, my erection trying to turn them into a tent. I immediately turned around in humiliation, “Oh. My. God!”
I was mortified.
I heard an airy laugh behind me. “It’s not funny, Jim. I don’t even know how that happened?”
“Charlie, it’s okay. It happens. Especially at your age,” lightly laughing some more. “It really doesn’t take much to make our friend come alive.”
While he calmed down, I readjusted myself, so my “friend” was sticking up through my elastic waist band and my shirt was hanging over it, so it couldn’t be seen.
After, I turned around without looking at Jim, knowing now I was the same shade of red as the tomato soup we ate. “Charlie, will you look at me, please?”
I peeked up but didn’t make direct eye contact, instead focusing on anywhere else I could look. “Why don’t we start by pulling this pillow out from my back so we can get me twisted around,” he suggested. I did as he asked, getting him up with his legs over the edge of the bed.
He unbuttoned his own shirt, and the farther down he got the more skin he revealed.
He had a light dusting of dark blonde hair on his chest and stomach.
His chest looked like two puffed and taunt pillows, but when he flexed, they lost some of their softness and became hard plateaus.
His nipples stood out in little peaks and were an attractive red clay color.
I wanted to lick them so bad. This wasn’t helping my problem down below.
When Jim stopped moving, I realized I had been staring.
Fuck. At this rate, my face would never go back to its normal color. I helped slip his arms out of the shirt and set it aside. That only left his slacks, which I now realize I’m going to have to do because he can’t twist or bend over.
Before I knew what I was saying, I asked, “Are you wearing undergarments?”
Oh. My. God.
I slapped my own face.
Jim laughed, then groaned, “You have got to stop making me laugh, Charlie,” as he continued to chuckle anyway.
“I’m so glad my embarrassment is entertaining for you,” keeping my face covered, making my voice come out all muffled. I felt a hand on mine and them being pulled away.
Jim was looking at me with mirth but with a little bit of a pinch too.
“Sorry,” then bounced his head from side to side, “kind of,” smirking.
“I have undergarments on. I’ll unbutton the tops and let them fall if you could just help me step out of them and into my pajama bottoms. Standing is starting to hurt a bit. ”
“Yes, of course. Sorry,” feeling like a big git for making this all about me and my embarrassment when he’s standing here hurting while trying to get comfortable for bed.
We got his pants off, me down in front of him, but also, me avoiding looking at his groin area completely.
He was wearing Jockey Briefs, so when I had him take one step forward into his pajama bottoms, it gave me a nice look at his butt contained in the tight white ribbed fabric.
Holy. Hell.
I shook my head out and pulled up his bottoms for him to tie. After, we got a shirt on him, then I took him to freshen up in the bathroom which he did on his own.
Thank God.
Then, we got him comfortable again back in bed with a pillow wedged under him to keep him from rolling on to his left side or off the bed completely. I went to grab my pillow from the other room and came back, turned off the light before I joined him under the covers, facing him.
I was nervous as hell, and it must have shown because he started to rub my arm, up and down, over and over. I closed my eyes, trying to use the feeling as a comfort. That was when I felt a light kiss near my ear and Jim whispered, “Can I hold you?”
My eyes sprang open. He was looking at me with so much care.
It was like a very small piece of his heart had broken off and moved to his eyes to show me the truth.
I nodded and rolled over to face away from him.
He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me closer, cocooning himself around me. “Is this okay?”
I relaxed into his arms, feeling more protected and safer than I ever have before. “This is perfect,” I exhaled.
Jim kissed the back of my head twice before he said, “Goodnight, my honey.”
I never wanted to leave his arms again.