Chapter 41
When Charlie entered the cavern where the Trial was to be held, her first thought was that she was about to be asked to fight someone to the death.
The “cavern” was more like a small underground coliseum, the kind of place that evoked swords and armor.
The entrance was a tall archway that fed spectators out onto the circular walkway at the top of the cavern.
Below the walkway were twenty rows of benches that wrapped around the room, like an enormous concentric staircase.
Unlike the rest of the palace, this room was sandy orange and had a craggy, uneven ceiling.
It looked as if it had been carved straight into the earth, rather than built.
On the lowest level, where a dusty arena for chariot fighting should have been, was a floor carved from an enormous tree trunk.
It wasn’t a floor made of wood; there were no planks fixed together, no seams or borders.
Instead, there was one smooth, unbroken wooden circle containing so many rings that Charlie wouldn’t dare to count them.
It looked just like the freshly sawed stumps she sometimes saw in the forest, except so large that a hundred men could comfortably congregate atop its surface.
Charlie and Mason came to a halt in the entrance, staring down at the giant stump.
Henry, who was now perched on Charlie’s shoulder, sent colors of amazement into her mind.
From behind, souls pushed excitedly past, hurrying down the staircase of benches to try and nab the best seats. But Charlie and Mason could only stare.
Because there, driven blade-first into the very center of the wood, was a spear wreathed in shadow.
The Seal itself is said to be a physical object. Legend has it that Odin gave up his most precious weapon, the spear Gungnir, for the task.
That’s what Elias had told her, so many weeks before. And there it was. Gungnir, Odin’s beloved spear that he had surrendered to create the spell that would protect humanity.
This was the Seal.
Suddenly Charlie felt lightheaded. She was barely aware of her surroundings as a pair of mare guards materialized at her side, ushering her and Mason along the upper rim of the arena.
She barely took in the curving walkway they walked to reach the other side.
Barely felt it when they shoved them through a low doorway into a small room lit by torches and furnished with only one low table and a pair of candlesticks.
Barely noticed the guards vanishing, leaving her, Mason, and Henry entirely alone.
Henry.
In the chaos of learning she was to do her Trial now, she’d completely forgotten about him.
Charlie crouched down, looking the v?tte right in the brim of his red hat, the spot where his eyes should have been. “Hey, bud,” she said. “Why don’t you run around and explore that arena a bit, okay?”
GO NOW?
“Yes.” Charlie didn’t like sending Henry away, but she had no idea what was about to happen in this tiny, dark room, and she didn’t want him to worry any more than he already was. “It’s important that you stake out the surroundings before we go out there.”
Henry hesitated, his little head looking between Charlie and Mason.
“Don’t worry about me,” said Charlie, doing her best to keep her voice light. “If I get into any trouble in here, you’ll feel it. Okay?”
Placated, Henry nodded. The top of his hat flapped back and forth. I GO.
And he did, toddling across the floor and out the low door.
Moments later, Loki swept into the room, putting his back to them as he shut the door. “We don’t have much time,” he said. “I have to—”
“That’s Gungnir,” Charlie said, cutting right to the chase. “At the bottom of the pit, on that wooden floor. That’s the Seal.”
Loki turned around, raising his eyebrows. “That’s right, Charlie. Very well deduced.”
Something about hearing her name spoken by Loki’s voice—which sounded warmer, gravellier, away from the crowd’s prying eyes—made Charlie’s heart twist. There was a fondness there. A familiarity. As if he had said it many, many times before.
Could that be?
“I don’t understand,” she said, shaking her head. “All this time … the Seal has been here? In Helheim?”
“That’s correct,” said Loki. “The Seal is here, but it is connected to Asgard via Yggdrasil, as you probably noticed when you walked in. The wood that the spear is driven into is one of the many branches of the world tree itself. That’s how Yggdrasil’s magic can reach Asgard.”
“But…” Charlie stammered, casting around for the right question to ask.
She was so lost. She’d been certain that Loki was looking for the Seal.
That was the whole reason he’d sent Elias to Silver Shores in the first place—to find the Fenrir and ask for the Seal’s location.
“But the Fenrir … You wanted Elias to capture him so that he would help you find the Seal.”
“I wanted Elias to capture the Fenrir—that’s correct,” said Loki. “I wanted to know what my son knew. But I never said that it was so that I could find the Seal.”
“But—” she started, but she froze when Loki stepped forward and placed his hands on her shoulders.
“Listen to me, Charlie,” he said, bending down to look her directly in the eyes. “I know you’re confused. I know you have questions. But there’s no time for me to answer them. Not right now. Right now, I need you to listen to what I’m about to say. Your life depends on it.”
Charlie could barely breathe. What was going on? She glanced over at Mason, who looked just as confused as she felt.
“The Trial is about to begin,” Loki said.
“You’re going to have to grab hold of Gungnir for it.
The Seal is the source of all skuggmagi.
Every human that becomes a mare must face down the Seal and prove themselves strong enough to harness the shadows.
If they do, the Seal will create a second being within you. A being made only of shadow.”
“Face it down?” Charlie whispered. “What does that mean?”
“It’s different for everyone,” said Loki. “You can’t know what you’ll face until you take hold of Gungnir.”
“But…” She shook her head. “No one should touch the spear, right? What if they accidentally pull it out of Yggdrasil? The Seal would vanish.”
“The Seal can only be pulled from Yggdrasil by the bringer of Ragnarok. That’s the prophecy that has been told and retold since the day it was created.” He gave her a small smile, lifting one eyebrow. “You aren’t planning on destroying Asgard, are you?”
“Of course not,” she said.
“Then please don’t fret. Just focus on making it through the Trial alive. Okay?”
Charlie glanced at Mason. Her brother could only shake his head. She looked back at Loki and said, “I don’t under—”
But before she could get the rest of the word out, all of the air left her body when Loki pulled her into the tightest hug she’d ever received in her life. She froze, arms suspended at her sides.
“I’m so sorry, Charlotte,” he whispered into her hair.
“I’m sorry that this is how things played out.
I’m sorry that I can’t give you the answers you need right now.
Just know that I did everything I could to protect you.
All of you, including your mother. I knew that no child of mine would ever be safe.
Not truly. But I swear that I did everything I could to try and make it so. ”
She was speechless. She had so many questions and no words to ask them.
Loki released her and grabbed Mason, pulling him into the same bone-crushing hug that she had received.
“I know you hate me,” he said, “and I understand why. But when Charlie makes it through this Trial alive, I’ll explain everything.” He pulled back, holding onto Mason’s shoulders and looking deep into his eyes. “I promise.”
Mason’s mouth opened and closed several times. Before he could get any words out, a roar filtered into the room from the arena.
Loki released Mason’s shoulders, looking toward the door. “It’s time,” he said. “The Trial is about to begin.” Without another word, he ducked out the small doorframe.
Mason was about to do the same, but Charlie grabbed his wrist.
“Wait,” she said.
Her brother turned around, raising his eyebrows.
“I just…” She gnawed on her lower lip, uncertain how to say what she needed to. “Thank you. For coming with me.” She smiled weakly. “It would really suck to die alone.”
Mason’s eyes flared. “You aren’t dying today, Char. Don’t talk like that.”
We don’t know that, she thought.
“I just want to know…” She shook her head. “Why did you help me save Elias? I thought you hated him.”
“I do,” he said bluntly. “Frankly, I don’t care if he lives or dies. He doesn’t matter to me. But…” He sighed, looking out the doorway and running a hand through his hair, then met Charlie’s gaze again. “I can see that he matters to you.”
Inhaling sharply, she said, “I don’t—”
“You don’t have to pretend, Char. And I’m not even talking about what I walked in on back in those woods. In fact”—he made a gagging face—“I’d prefer to never talk about that again.”
She snorted.
“I’m saying that you care for him, Charlie. You lost it when you thought he was dying. I mean, you dragged us all the way to a different realm to save him.” He smiled sadly. “I don’t think you’d do that for someone who didn’t matter to you.”
“But that doesn’t explain why you came with me,” she insisted. “Why risk your life for someone you hate?”
This time, his smile was warm and genuine.
He took her hand. “You’re my little sister, Char.
No matter how angry I was with you for not telling me about Sophie, nothing will ever change that.
You’re my little sister, and I would do anything for you.
” He squeezed her hand gently. “You know that, right?”
Charlie felt something inflate inside her.
She squeezed back. “Yeah,” she said. “I know.”
When they ducked out of the small room and into the arena, the crowd exploded with cheering and applause.
It was as if Charlie were a pop star or a politician. The entire cavern shook with the spirits’ excitement and anticipation.
Unfortunately, she thought, as she followed Loki around the walkway, a more accurate metaphor would have probably been that of a gladiator. A warrior just as likely to die as to survive.
Henry met them at the top of the stairs, and they started to descend.
Spirits reached out as they passed, touching her arms and legs lightly.
She didn’t know if the touches were meant to be good luck or simply out of curiosity for how her living skin felt.
When they reached the bottom, Charlie started to step down onto the flat wood of Yggdrasil, Henry right behind her.
Loki held out a hand, stopping her just before her foot made contact. “Remove your shoes first. And the v?tte must stay here.”
“What?” Charlie looked down at Henry, who was standing expectantly beside the ring. He looked nervous but excited, as if he thought they were about to go on an adventure together. “But—”
“It’s nonnegotiable,” the god said decisively. “All humans must face the Trial on their own. No help from friends. Or fuzzy little minions.”
He’s not a minion, Charlie wanted to say. He’s a part of me. I’m a part of him. Whatever we do, we do together.
Instead, she asked, “What happens to our tether after the Trial?”
“I don’t know,” Loki admitted. “I’ve never turned a human with a v?tte before. The tether will probably snap.”
Charlie’s breath caught.
WE GOING? Henry asked.
Charlie swallowed. He hadn’t understood Loki’s words. He didn’t know what was going on.
No, buddy, she sent. I’ve got to do this on my own.
THEN COME BACK?
Her heart felt as if it were strangling itself. Right, she replied, not knowing if she was telling the truth. Then I’ll come back.
She looked up at Loki. “Give him to Mason, please.”
After a brief pause, Loki nodded.
Charlie gave Henry a last smile, which he returned by sending her warm, yellow-orange colors of encouragement.
They made her chest ache. Finally, because she had no excuses left not to, she bent over and undid the laces of her shoes, pulling them off and removing her socks.
She left them all in a little pile at the entrance to the wooden arena.
Exhaling, she lowered one bare foot, then another, toes touching first. She eased her weight carefully down until she stood squarely atop Yggdrasil.
It was about a thirty-foot walk to Gungnir, and Charlie dragged it out for as long as she possibly could.
These were her last moments as a human; she wanted to savor them.
The air smelled of ash and dust. The crowd spoke in whispers.
The wood of Yggdrasil was smooth beneath her feet, worn from the thousands of others who’d taken this journey before her.
Some lived to become mares. Others … didn’t.
She swallowed thickly. If Charlie survived the Trial, who would she be afterward?
Would she still feel like herself? Elias said that, in becoming a mare, you forfeit part of your humanity.
Is that what was about to happen? Would she awake with no feelings, no emotions, no love, no compassion?
Would she have to fight to return to herself?
Would she even want to fight, if erasing all the good meant erasing all the bad, too?
Too soon, she arrived before Gungnir. Her bare feet planted themselves shoulder-width apart, toes pointed toward the spear.
Up close, the shadows surrounding Gungnir’s wood were black and round as snakeskin, almost identical to the cords that she’d seen Elias conjure on several different occasions.
She was about to reach her hands into those shadows.
To feel them coil around her fists as she clung to Gungnir and prayed that she would live to feel her hands let go.
With trembling hands, she raised her palms up to either side of the spear. They hovered there, centimeters from the wood, for one long, breathless moment.
Another message from Henry appeared in her mind:
YOU CAN DO THIS
Tears pricked the corners of her eyes.
Then she grabbed Gungnir as tight as she could.