4. Cutter
CUTTER
I quietly open the kitchen cupboard next to the sink and grab the bag of coffee grounds along with a filter.
I’m careful not to make any loud noises as I fill the carafe and pour it into the coffee maker.
The start button beeps when I press it, and I wince, looking over my shoulder at the couch Sadie is currently curled up on.
She doesn’t move an inch. Poor girl must be exhausted. I know I am.
I run a hand down my face, tugging at my beard before leaning against the counter.
It’s only a few minutes past seven in the morning, but I’ve been up for hours.
Truthfully, I never went to sleep. I couldn’t seem to get comfortable last night, and when I finally found an acceptable position in bed, my mind assaulted me with thoughts of my curvy little trespasser.
Sadie is unlike anyone I’ve ever met. She’s stunning, yes, and sexy as hell with her curvy hips, thick thighs, and green eyes that sparkle with mischief when she grins.
But there’s something buried beneath her sassy smile and endless topics of conversation.
I felt it before I even laid eyes on her, and the longer I spend in Sadie’s presence, the stronger the feeling grows.
Bits and pieces of our conversation from yesterday rattle around in my brain.
In the forest, she said she’d been in worse positions than this.
When I examined her ankle, she had enough experience with injuries to tell me it wasn’t broken or sprained, just a bad bruise.
She said she’d had worse, which ignited flame deep in my bones that wouldn’t go away.
Even after a relentless workout in the home gym in my basement, I still feel the embers of anger toward whoever or whatever hurt her in the past. I can’t say for certain what her story is, and I sure as hell don’t deserve to know.
However, I can give her a good meal – which I forgot to do last night – and then get her back to town.
The rich smell of coffee fills the kitchen, providing a momentary distraction from my thoughts. I busy myself with grabbing a mug and filling it with the elixir of life. Like all good coffee, the bitterness jolts me awake as soon as it hits my tongue.
Sadie’s blankets rustle slightly, and she rolls over, yawning as her arms stretch above her head.
I take another sip of coffee while spying on her from my vantage point in the kitchen.
Her emerald eyes blink a few times as she adjusts to her surroundings.
A slight blush crawls up her neck and settles in her cheeks, making her look soft and cute and all sorts of things I would never say out loud.
Shut it down , I warn myself. Sadie is simply a young woman in a bad situation who needs help. It’s not like I’m going to keep her. Even if I did, I’m sure she’d leave me eventually.
My own mother couldn’t stick around for more than six months at a time.
She often grew bored with small-town life and took off, only returning when she ran into trouble or ran out of money.
My old man was so in love with her that he didn’t care how often she left or how long she was gone.
I promised myself I’d never let a woman run my life like that.
“Is that coffee I smell?” Sadie asks the empty living room. I don’t think she can see me, so I don’t say anything for a moment. “I know you’re in the kitchen. I can see your toes peeking out around the corner.”
I move my feet further inside the kitchen, which makes Sadie laugh. It’s silly and ridiculous what that sound does to me. Screw coffee, this is all the kickstart I need for my day.
Fuck. I’m so fucked.
“Yes,” I grunt in answer to her question.
“Oh, thank God. I was worried I’d have to wait until I got back to civilization for my sweet, sweet caffeine."
I try and fail not to smirk at her reply.
Sadie pulls the blankets back and stands up, wobbling slightly on her sore ankle.
I set my coffee down and step out of my not-so-subtle hiding spot, but she holds her hands up and shoos me away.
I hesitate, part of me wanting to scoop her up so she doesn’t feel pain when she walks, while another part understands she wants her independence.
I keep a close eye on her as she walks slowly into the kitchen, ready to catch her if she falls.
“Sit,” I practically bark at her when she’s next to the stools at the breakfast bar. Why does everything I say sound so harsh? She probably thinks I’m a grumpy asshole, which isn’t too far off from the truth. It’s for the best that she sees my true colors now, before one of us gets attached.
Sadie’s lips do that thing again. She’s smiling at me, a genuine, pure, playful smile, like she thinks I’m adorable.
She told me that yesterday, but I thought she was making fun of me.
Now, I see that Sadie truly isn’t offended by my nonexistent people skills or my uncouth grunts.
She meant every word, and I’m not sure what to do with that information.
The confounding woman takes a seat and rests her elbows on the solid oak bar top. The sweatshirt she’s wearing is far too big for her, the sleeves covering her hands completely and leaving enough fabric for her to ball into her hands. It’s kind of… adorable. Dammit.
Instead of unpacking those feelings, I turn and pour her a cup of coffee. She takes a sip and immediately spits it out, coughing a few times before getting herself under control. I fill a glass with water and hand it to her, which she takes gratefully.
“Too hot?” I guess, hovering next to her.
I’m not sure if I should thump her on the back to clear her airway or pat her on the shoulder in an awkward attempt at comforting her. Ultimately, I don’t do anything, not trusting myself to touch her. I might wrap her up in my arms and bury my nose in her hair so I can smell my shampoo on her.
“The temperature is fine, but you must have gotten the portions wrong.” Her face scrunches up in disgust, and yeah, it’s fuckin’ adorable, too.
“The coffee is perfect,” I inform her. I take a big gulp of my coffee to prove it.
“I hate to be the one to inform you, but coffee is supposed to be a liquid. This, however…” She trails off and looks down at the offending drink, the corner of her lips turning down into a frown. “This is thick enough to chew.”
She stares at me with an accusing glare, and Jesus, I want to wipe that look off her face with a kiss so devastating she’ll never want to leave.
“How do you make your coffee?” I ask after clearing my throat.
“With fewer coffee grounds in the actual cup, for starters,” she says with a playful sparkle in her eyes. “At the very least, it needs to have milk and sugar. Preferably half-and-half with two pumps of hazelnut syrup.”
“Is that all?”
“And whipped cream.”
“Naturally.”
“I also love the raw sugar crystals sprinkled on top. They add a little crunch to my beverage.”
“Thought you didn’t like chewing your coffee.” I peer at Sadie over the rim of my mug, far too pleased at the amused look in her captivating green eyes.
“Okay, Mr. Sassy Pants,” she teases.
“I thought my name was Mr. Mountain Man Moose Wrangler.” I shouldn’t be encouraging this back and forth. I certainly shouldn’t be enjoying it as much as I am.
“You’re multi-talented,” she replies easily.
Her eyes light up when they meet mine, and I have to look away.
It’s too much, too intense, too… vulnerable, somehow.
I don’t deserve to have fun. I don’t deserve her banter or her compliments.
I don’t deserve any good thing this woman is so freely giving me.
“Breakfast,” I announce awkwardly. “Omelets sound good?”
“Always,” Sadie answers enthusiastically.
“Gotta go collect the eggs.” I set my mug in the sink, ready to slip on my boots and head to the chicken coop.
“Wait, you mean, like fresh eggs?”
“Laid this morning,” I confirm. Her eyes grow wide with excitement, and I know she’s about to ask a million questions.
“How many chickens do you have? How many eggs do they lay per day? Does it take long for the eggs to… be birthed? Is that the right term? Do you ever have too many? Why are some eggs brown and others are white?” She sucks on her lips to keep more questions from spilling out.
Her curiosity and eagerness are contagious.
“Want to come with me and see?” I offer instead of telling her to stay put. I should be telling her to pack what little belongings she has with her so I can load her up into my truck as soon as we’re done with breakfast.
“Yes!” Sadie gingerly steps off the barstool, reminding me of the reason she’s here in the first place. She hurt her ankle. “I’m feeling a lot better this morning,” she says, as if reading my mind.
I grunt, then kneel in front of her to inspect the swollen joint. It’s not nearly as red and puffy today, but I see the faint outline of a bruise forming beneath her skin.
“See? Just a bruise. No biggie.”
I look up at her as she shrugs. I wonder how many times she’s said that to herself and others over the years. A piece of my heart chips away at her words as well as the fake smile she has plastered on her face.
Nodding once, I head to my room and grab a pair of socks along with an extra pair of work boots for her to wear. They might be huge on her, but there’s no way in hell she’s wearing those high heels I found her in.
Five minutes later, we’re walking across the South side of my property, where the chicken coop is.
I look over my shoulder, noticing that Sadie has fallen behind.
I realize that she has to take two steps for every one of my longer strides.
And, of course, she’s walking more slowly due to her injury.
I’m already fucking this up .
Stopping abruptly, I wait for Sadie to catch up. She steps up next to me, and I brace myself to look at her. She’s that distracting. She’s also getting my feelings all tangled up, which is shocking considering I didn’t think I had any of those left.
“Cutter, your home and land are incredible,” she whispers. I don’t know if I’m ready to see her face, but her hushed, awed tone draws my attention to her anyway.
Sadie’s lips are slightly parted, her dark green eyes taking in the field of wildflowers to our right before panning over to the greenhouse to the left.
My chest puffs out in pride, knowing she likes what she sees.
I’ve never had anyone in my cabin before, and I’ve definitely never given a tour of my property.
“I do okay for myself.”
“Uh, yeah you do.” Sadie looks up at me with her signature sassy smile. “You raise chickens, you grow veggies, you wrangle moose, what else is there to this mountain man life?”
“You lookin’ to become a mountain man?” I ask, raising an eyebrow at her.
Sadie’s eyes twinkle. “Just curious. I could see why someone might give up hazelnut coffee to live out here.”
She takes a few steps forward, wanting to explore more of my land. Her words settle deep down in my gut, even though my instinct is to fight them. She can’t possibly mean that. And even if she does, it’s not like she’s picturing spending her life with me up here on the mountain.
“I sell canned vegetables, herbs, spices, and special seasoning blends,” I blurt out in a rush.
“Really? Cutter, I’m so impressed. I had no idea. You’re like… kind of amazing.” She turns around, letting me see the surprise and delight in her eyes. It’s too much.
“It’s nothing,” I say with a shrug. “Besides, I might not be at it for much longer,” I mutter. She furrows her brow at my response. “The vultures at Top Spot Realty have been trying to buy my land for years, and now they’ve trained their sights on the town as well.”
“Would it be so bad to have fresh money in the town and a bit of tourism?”
“Yes,” I spit out. “They want to take everything good and unique about this place and turn it into some master planned community. They’re soulless, selfish, money-hungry bastards, each and every one.”
After a moment of silence, I look at Sadie, who is expressionless. Can’t say I’ve ever seen her like that, and I wonder what she’s thinking.
A second later, she blinks and returns to her usual, bubbly self. “How long have you been out here? At least a few years to set all of this up.”
I nod. “A few years.”
“Thanks for that very specific answer,” she says sarcastically. “Where did you live before?”
“In town.”
“What made you move?”
I have to look away from her as memories of that horrible day flood my mind. I should have been there. My dad would still be alive if I weren’t so selfish.
A soft, warm hand covers my balled-up fist, infusing peace and light back into my soul.
“It’s okay,” Sadie whispers. “We don’t have to talk about it.”
I close my eyes, letting her hushed tone and gentle touch soothe the jagged edges of my soul. For the first time since scooping her up in the forest last night, the chatty woman is silent. She lets me have my space, which I appreciate more than she knows.
The moment becomes too much, too vulnerable, too intense. Sadie must sense my chaotic thoughts and slips her hand from mine, letting me turn away from her.
It’s not that I don’t want her here… It’s that I like her being here. I might even need her to be here with me, forever. And that’s a truly dangerous thought.
I clear my throat after a moment of silence, straightening my spine and squaring my shoulders. I’m about to grab the eggs we need for breakfast so I can get Sadie out of here before I get even more attached, but then Sadie lets out a pained yelp.
I spin on my heel, searching for her. The woman is on the ground, clutching her ankle. I rush over to her, horrified when she gasps and covers her face, as if bracing herself for an attack. Jesus, it fucking hurts seeing her react that way.
Kneeling in front of her, I hold my hands out to show her I’m not a threat. Sadie drops her arms immediately, looking a bit embarrassed. “Sorry,” she says, avoiding eye contact.
“I’m not going to hurt you,” I remind her.
“Of course not,” she agrees, her smile fixed in place as if nothing happened. Goddamnit, this woman is pulling all kinds of protective, possessive feelings out of me, and she’s not even trying.
“Let’s go,” I say before gathering her up in my arms once more. Is it crazy that I’ve missed holding her? Yes. Undoubtedly, yes. “You’ve had enough excitement for one morning.”
“I’ll have you know that I’m always up for an adventure,” she replies. I don’t doubt that for a moment.
“Maybe I’ve had enough excitement for one morning,” I mutter under my breath.
“Did you say something?”
“Nope,” I grunt. I don’t know what I’m going to do with this woman, but the more time I spend with her, the less I want her to leave. It bears repeating; I’m so fucked.