51. Thea
Chapter 51
Thea
“ L ater.” Ryland says, squeezing my shoulder before walking away to join his friends. He doesn’t hover like I thought he might, trying to push for us to bond. He sees me, and he speaks when he has a moment, and treats our acquaintance like he’s any other guy on campus. I appreciate him letting me take things at my own pace.
I finish my drink and walk over to the trash to throw the empty can away. I enjoyed eating my lunch outside today, but my trip to the can means I have to pass by Eloise, who’s standing in front of the dining hall.
“God.” She snorts. “You’re still just as pathetic and desperate for attention as ever. Shaking your ass at a third year isn’t gonna help your abysmal scores.”
I’m desperate for attention, but she’s the one who can’t go five minutes without talking to me, or about me. “Are you sure? Because shaking my ass worked out pretty good for me last year.”
“You think you’re special because The Trium fucked you? You’re not. They were only using you, because you’re so easy and kept throwing yourself at them. That’s what they do. They fuck classless sluts like you and marry people like me.”
This argument is getting old. Doesn’t she have any other comeback lines? “You’re absolutely right. They marry people like you, after taking a turn with people like me to satisfy their every sexual need. When they get dissatisfied with their boring lives, they cheat with people like me . They buy houses, cars, and pay bills for people like me. We get the fun and excitement. They do things with us sluts that they never do with wives like you . I’m okay with being their party girl, because I’d hate to have to deal with them and suffer through a disappointing and unfulfilled marriage.”
She tosses her hair and sniffs. “It’s about time you finally admit you’re a whoring home wrecker.”
“I admit I’m not the marrying type and have no desires to tie myself to any of your precious heirs for the rest of my life. So while you’re suffering and stewing in your gilded cage of gold, I’ll be free and happy, having amazing experiences, and meeting other exciting people. I’ll be fucking whoever I want, while you negotiate which kink is acceptable or more likely to result in you getting the trip or house or other crystalized bullshit you want.”
She’s turning red, so I hammer home my point. “You enjoy your marriage to Pax. Just remember, when he tries to do something positively filthy to you; something so depraved you feel the need to bathe in holy water and confess to your priest afterwards that I’m the one who turned him out.”
I turn, nearly bumping into her future hubby’s chest. I can’t read the expression on his face, and I don’t care to waste time trying to figure it out.
“Pax!” Eloise hisses. “Pax, I’m waiting!”
Smirking up at him, I taunt, “She’s waiting, Pax. You’d better go to her before she announces to everyone on campus that she’s withholding sex from you.”
His jaw clenches. My smile widens, seeing that I’ve struck a nerve. “Oops. My bad. Is she doing that already?” I pat him on the chest. “I bet you wish you had an outlet like Finn had last year.”
“Are you offering to be that outlet?”
I know Eloise is trying to listen in to our conversation and that my proximity to Pax is pissing her off. This is exactly how things started with Finn, but I’m not going there again. Pax made a fool of me. I warned him he only had one chance to prove he was worthy of my time and affection. He wasn’t. So now, he’s just another jackass for me to wind up for my amusement.
“The next time I put my hands on your dick, it’ll be to sever it from your unconscious body.” I wiggle my left hand and brandish my onyx hilted baby with my right. “Want me to touch it?”
He takes a step back, then to the side to let me pass. I turn to face the two of them. I’m never leaving my back exposed to them again. And because Petty Patty has taken up residence in my soul, I throw my middle fingers up, and bop my shoulders, like I’m rocking out to my favorite band.
They enter the dining hall, and I when I turn back around, I bump into another immovable force. Dammit. How do they keep sneaking up on me? The anger radiating off of Holden is unmistakable. He must’ve heard what I said to Pax. The last time the air around him felt this volatile, I wound up on my knees for him. That won’t be happening today.
“What?” I snap, already spoiling for a fight because of his friend. I don’t care about the shit Eloise was saying, but a part of me is hurt that Pax didn’t step in and correct her. He knows I wasn’t just fucking The Trium, trying to climb some rickety ass social ladder. There were feelings there. Were. Before. Not now. Not anymore.
Holden just stares at me. I suck my teeth and move to walk around him. His words are soft. A quiet whisper that belays the anger coming off of him. They’re so soft and quiet that I almost think I’ve imagined them.
“I told you I’d figure out what you were hiding, and before you try to lie to me, when I say I know. I mean, I know where you were, and it wasn’t in a Riverside County Correction Facility. At least not for as long as you want us to think you were.”
I feel an equal mixture of relief and anger at hearing those words. Relief that he kept digging for the truth instead of just accepting what I said, and anger that he didn’t believe what I said.
“I know where you were, Thea. What I don’t know is how you got there.”
“How long?” I ask, avoiding his gaze. There’s no point in bothering to pretend that I don’t know what he’s talking about. I’m getting so tired of pretending.
He knows, and I need to know just how fucked I am. Because if he knows, he won’t keep it to himself. Finn and Pax will know too, if they don’t already. Then after that, how long will it take for them to turn me in to the council for lying? How close is the nearest Phoenix team that can get me out of here?
“Long enough.” A small smile curls the end of his lips. “You look beautiful, backlit by fire.”
My spine stiffens. If he knows how I look backlit by fire, that means he was following me. He literally saw me light the match. He saw just how weak I am. I infuse as much boredom into my voice as I can muster, even though I’m spiraling on the inside. “So you’re observant, and you figured it out. Good for you.”
He blocks my path when I go to step around him. “There are a few things I haven’t figured out yet. Like the names of everyone who worked there, and how you got out.”
He could be here on Malcolm’s orders, trying to set me up. I assume Lazarro snuck me away from Rockridge, but I don’t really have any proof of that. My paranoia has paranoia and anything is possible at this point.
“If I were filing a class action suit, it would be against Riverside Corrections office. I can’t name names. I was just a violent offender being moved from one place to the next.” I step to the right, and he mirrors my actions, blocking my way. “You’d better hurry and catch up with your friends. I think Pax was on his way to convince Eloise to unlock her chastity belt. He might need help holding her legs open.”
“I’m more interested in holding yours open.”
“We’ve had this talk before, Holden. Mine are permanently closed to you.”
“You’re talking about the choice you made not to get back together.”
“That’s right.”
His gaze bores into mine, in that soul searching, lie sniffing way of his. “Is this choice based on anger or fear?”
“I’m not afraid of you.” And that’s true. I’m not afraid of Holden. I’m uncomfortable right now, but that’s not from actual fear.
“But you are afraid of something.” He says, instead of assuming my answer is based on anger. Fucking observant mother fucker. He crowds my space again, gripping my chin, forcing me to look up at him. “I told you, every one of your fears belongs to me. So tell me, what has you on edge?”
I clench my teeth to keep from answering.
“Thea, you know I’ll find out what you’re hiding and what you’re afraid of.”
He studies my face, looking for a flinch. A muscle tick. A sharp intake of breath. But there’s nothing to see. No emotions to give me away. I’m dead inside and out.
Leaning closer, his lips graze against my ear. The handle of my knife is in my palm. I slowly pull it out. “I’m glad you don’t want to talk, Rey. I’d rather chase and fuck your terrors out of you.”
He releases me and walks down the path in the opposite direction of Pax and Eloise.
Pax
“You need to stay away from her, Pax.” Eloise hisses as we take our seats.
“Excuse me?” I regret responding, as soon as the words are out of my mouth. I’ve done is give her the opening she wanted, so she can talk shit about Thea.
“Can’t you see the game she’s playing? She’s trying to do the same thing she did with Finn.”
“What is it that you think she did with Finn?”
“She used him to try to embarrass me, and look what happened. It cost him his companion and our marriage contract.” Pity fills her voice as she says, “And he hasn’t been assigned another one.”
She glances at the table for validation. Is that how she’s been spinning this, even after what Holden said to her? Is she really telling people she was the injured party? That she was so affronted by Finn’s behavior that she broke the contract and the reason he doesn’t have a new companion is because he’s being punished?
Finn fucked around for years. So is Thea the straw that broke the camel’s back? If that’s the case, then what does that say about Eloise? Why was Thea such a threat and the others were acceptable? Trying to follow that logic, I ask, “How does Holden factor into this? He was spending time with Thea, too.”
“That certainly didn’t do him any favors either. Finn and Holden were led by their lust, but you’re supposed to be smarter than that. Your father has assured me you are s marter than that, Pax.”
I grip my fork. She calls Thea manipulative, but she brought my father into the conversation because she thinks that’s the way to keep me in line. I’m just as ruled by my lust as my friends, but it’s my emotions that are keeping me in compliance with this stupid fucking plan.
I try to stay calm as I point out, “I didn’t actively seek Thea out. You were engaged in a pissing contest with her when I walked up. If you want me to keep my distance, then maybe you shouldn’t get into shouting matches with her in front of the dining hall.”
I say the last part a little louder than necessary, because I know Eloise’s image is important to her, and sometimes threatening it is the only way to get her to back down.
She rearranges her silverware. “I didn’t start anything. She- she has it out for me.”
And for good reason. I wave my hand dismissively. “Whatever, Eloise. Don’t bring her into our life and give her reasons to want to get back at you. Just steer clear of her and you won’t have anything to worry about. If you can’t do that, then there are bound to be more times when I walk up on the both of you going at it, and she’ll use that as an opportunity to come on to me.”
God, I wish I lived in a world where Thea would flirt with me just to spite Eloise. Fuck, I’d be the happiest, horniest guy on the planet if that happened.
Eloise’s jaw clenches as she stares down at her plate. I’ve just tied her hands. She can’t have it both ways. If she truly wants me to stay away from Thea, she needs to stop going out of her way to antagonize her.
Of course, everything I’m saying is bullshit. I have no intention of limiting my exposure to Thea, or stop trying to get a reaction out of her. I’m desperate for any type of contact with her. Even if interacting with her comes with the threat of getting my dick chopped off.