Prologue #2
My stomach heaved, and the remnants of my Pop-Tart breakfast spewed across his lap and all over the fancy leather upholstery. Jumping up, he released me and let out a curse. “God, damn it!”
Go, now. The words slammed into my skull. Run or die. Beneath the layer of vomit, my eyes settled on the ignition button. I pressed and held it down until the car ground to a halt, the doors unlocking.
I leapt out of the barely moving car and raced into the middle of the two-lane highway.
“Come back here, little girl! There’s nowhere to run!”
I sprinted across the middle of the road, running along the double yellow line. Behind me, the man shouted curses I couldn’t quite make out as I focused on getting the hell away. Don’t look back. Keep running. I pumped my arms like mad, the chaotic tempo echoing across my chest.
A massive truck turned onto the highway just below the overpass and barreled straight toward me.
I didn’t stop. Raising my hands, I waved my arms like mad until the enormous vehicle slowed.
The sound of screeching brakes jerked me out of the frenzied haze I’d descended into, and I sucked in a swig of balmy air.
“Are you crazy, kid?” A bearded man stuck his head out the driver’s side window when he finally stopped a few yards in front of me.
“H-Help...” I gasped, not a single breath of oxygen left in my lungs.
The man’s bloodshot eyes widened. “Are you okay?”
My head whipped back and forth.
He opened the door, and a fresh wave of panic assaulted me.
“No, stay away!” I cried, staggering back a few steps.
“Kid, I can’t help you unless you tell me what’s wrong.” He glanced over my shoulder, and I hazarded a peek down the highway.
The black Mercedes sped away in the opposite direction. I released the breath I’d been holding and slumped down in the middle of the road. Black seeped into the corners of my vision. I squeezed my eyes shut, forcing back the crushing fear.
“You want me to call the police or something?” He called out from his truck, half in, half out, drawing me back to the present.
“No,” I finally forced out. “J-Just go. I’ll…I’ll be fine.” The idea of stepping into another man’s car sounded worse than getting my eyes gouged out.
“You sure, kid?” He scratched at his greasy hair, dark brows gnarled in concern.
“…Yeah.”
“At least get out of the road, okay?”
I nodded numbly and forced myself to stand as all the adrenaline leached out of my system.
The trucker got back into the cab, and I watched from the side of the crumbling asphalt as he drove off. The moment he was gone, I collapsed again. The dam broke, my shoulders rounded, and tears cascaded down my cheeks.
My legs were still shaking by the time I snuck through the row of overgrown, yellowing hedges. I’d walked for miles because I’d left my damned backpack in that asshole’s car. No phone. No money. Nothing.
Thank God Killian lived closer to the school than I did.
I never would’ve made it all the way home.
Killian Briggs was my best friend, and right now, he was the only person I wanted to see.
If I saw Papá, I’d break down, and I refused to tell him what happened.
He could never know. My Puerto Rican father had a temper, and if he found out what that man tried to do to me, he’d hunt the bastard down and murder him.
There was no doubt in my mind. Then I’d be left without either of my parents. An orphan.
No. I would never tell anyone.
“Lexi?” Killian’s voice ripped my attention away from the bush I was apparently staring at.
I turned to see my friend wearing only pajama bottoms, bare chest gleaming in the early morning light.
Damn, when had he gotten so ripped? The absurd thought brought a hysterical laugh bubbling up my chest. Oh shit, I was losing my mind.
I was in shock. That had to be it. My throat tightened, unexpected emotion cutting off my air.
“What are you doing in my backyard, Red? Aren’t you supposed to be taking the ACTs?”
My feet compelled me forward, and I practically lunged at him, my arms lacing around his neck. I buried my face in his warm chest, and dammit, the tears started again.
Killian wrapped his arms around me like a shield. If he ever found out what almost happened to me that morning... someone would die. I vowed he never would, losing myself in his strong, familiar frame, the trace of mountain fresh laundry detergent mingling with his natural, musky boy scent.
“What’s wrong?”
Tears mingled with the light hairs on his chest, and a shudder surged up my spine. My shoulders shook, and I bawled like a freaking baby.
“Shit, Lexi, you’re scaring me. What the hell happened?” He forced me out to arm’s length, brushed an errant strand of hair behind my ear, and fixed those deep green eyes on me. “Tell me.”
My lower lip quivered, but I sucked in a breath, compelling myself to keep it together. I couldn’t tell him. How could I even form the disgusting words? It was impossible. I’d let that prick touch me... I should have fought harder. I should have—
“I missed the ACTs,” I muttered, forcing the truth away before I could completely spiral. “Papá’s car broke down on the side of I-12, and I didn’t make it to school in time.”
A chuckle rumbled his chest. “Red... that’s it?” Relief softened his voice. “Jesus, I thought something worse happened, like someone had died.”
Only a tiny sliver of my soul.
I forced myself to act normal and whacked him in the stomach, like I usually would, and barely suppressed a wince. “It is a big deal,” I whined. “You know how important that test is.”
“So you’ll be stuck here with me for a few more months... Is it really the end of the world?”
Killian had zero interest in college. His mom would probably force him to attend San Carlo CC, and that would be the end of his college experience.
Not me. I wanted—no needed—to become a doctor.
I’d felt so powerless when Mom died, when that fucking cancer ripped her away from us.
Now all I wanted was to devote my life to finding a cure, so no other nine-year-old would be forced to endure what I went through.
Or, at least, that was all I’d wanted until a few hours ago. Now, I wondered if I’d find the strength to survive until the end of the day.
“Lexi?”
“Huh?”
Killian eyed me warily. “You sure that was it?”
“Yeah, I’m just tired. I walked for like five miles to get here.”
“Where’s your phone?”
I snagged my lower lip between my teeth. “Lost it.”
He stepped closer, and I jumped back, heart leaping up my throat. “Lexi?” His dark brows furrowed as he regarded me.
Wrapping my arms around my torso like flesh and blood armor, I fought to hold myself together. His hand shot out, and my body betrayed me, recoiling before I could stop it.
“What the hell?”
“I’m… I’m just on edge,” I muttered, still chewing on my lower lip.
“You know, I can always tell when you’re lying.” He pointed at my mouth. “You do that thing with your lip.”
“Not lying,” I mumbled and released my bottom lip.
He shook his head and muttered something I couldn’t quite make out. “Well, why don’t you come inside so I can at least get dressed and take you home?”
“Okay, thanks.”
I followed him to the back porch and climbed the rickety steps.
Unlike my family, Killian’s had money once.
His dad wasted it all on gambling and drugs before drinking himself to death.
Killian’s house was nice, but in need of major repair.
He was always scared they’d lose it, but somehow his mom always held on.
I walked into the kitchen, and the scent of roasted coffee beans filled the air. An embarrassing groan slipped past my lips.
Killian ticked his head at the coffee maker. “Help yourself while I change.”
He darted around the cracked granite island and disappeared into the foyer.
His footsteps echoed overhead as he climbed the staircase.
I reached for the cupboard above the coffee maker and grabbed a mug.
Filling it with coffee, I inhaled the bittersweet aroma.
I could do this. What happened today wouldn’t define me.
I wouldn’t allow it to. It was one moment. One moment of incredible weakness.
On the walk over here, I’d replayed the incident over and over again. Why hadn’t I done something different? Why hadn’t I screamed? Punched him in the dick? Done anything at all?
What the hell was wrong with me?
Those menacing blue eyes filled my vision, and another bout of nausea churned in my belly.
What would’ve happened if I hadn’t puked?
Would he have raped me? My first time would’ve been at the hands of a monster.
I never wanted anyone to have that control over me again.
In that moment, I vowed to lose my virginity to the first willing guy I found.
At the thought, a tiny messed-up part of me felt better.
I’d taken back control. At least a tiny bit of it.
Killian stomped around his room just over my head. I glanced up and thought about my best friend. Nope, not him. He was the only good thing in my life, and screwing things up with him would kill me.
“Be right down, Red.” Killian’s voice echoed from upstairs.
I stepped out into the foyer, and my gaze drifted to the large bay windows. To the black Mercedes in the driveway.
I gasped, and the mug slid through my fingertips. It crashed to the floor, the sharp crack echoing through the quiet hallway. Hot coffee splattered my clothes, burning my skin, but I didn’t move, didn’t scream. I was numb. Frozen again.
“Shit, Lexi! Are you okay?” Killian barreled down the stairs, tugging the shirt over his head.
“I—I...” I stared out the window at the car as ice surged through my veins.
“What’s going on?” He crouched down and began picking up the pieces of broken ceramic.
I was paralyzed, eyes fixed on the car as fear suffocated me again. Killian stood and followed my line of sight, his hand full of broken shards. “The car?” he asked.
Somehow, I managed to nod.
“Mom’s new boyfriend, Stan.” He shrugged. “Seems like an okay guy, and the best part is, he’s loaded.”
The faint scent of cigars and scotch filled my nostrils, and a chill skated up my spine despite the heat blossoming in every murky crevice. Darkness blanketed my vision, and I was sure I’d pass out. Instead, I spun for the door and ran.