Chapter 24
DEPRAVED MONSTERS
Lexi
I trudged across the quiet campus toward Davenport Auditorium, anxiety weighing down my every step. I’d managed to avoid Killian all weekend after that disastrous party, but that would come to an end today.
On top of that, I felt like the worst friend ever. I’d totally ditched Micah at the ball to fuck around with someone I hated. And now my friend was avoiding me. He hadn’t even shown up to our Biology class.
I was a total asshole. Micah was one of my only friends at Stonewall, and the mere idea of losing him made my heart hurt. I never should’ve gone to that damned fancy ball. Not only had I possibly screwed things up with my friend, but now I was having recurring nightmares of Stan again.
It had taken me years of therapy to erase that man from my mind, and in one terrible night, I was back to square one.
I’d woken up Cordelia screaming and crying two nights in a row now.
Luckily, the girl slept like the dead and was able to fall back asleep in no time.
Meanwhile, I tossed and turned for hours with visions of silver-streaked Satan swirling in my mind.
Every time I closed my eyes I was back in that car.
His fingers ghosted over my skin, making their way up my thigh. ..
I squeezed my eyes shut, and a primal scream tore from my lips. Oops. That was not supposed to be out loud. Slowly opening my eyes, I found at least a dozen pairs of eyes staring in my direction.
“Spider,” I muttered lamely.
Great. Everyone already hated me thanks to that bitch, Lorelei. Now, they’d all think I was insane, too. I wasn’t sure which was worse, charity case or basket case.
Davenport Auditorium loomed just a few yards away, sending my pulse skyrocketing again. I didn’t think I could face Killian after what happened. And no, it wasn’t just because of how disgusted I was with myself.
It was because I couldn’t control my own body when I was around him. Just the idea of him had waves of fiery heat unfurling in my core.
I stopped in front of an old willow and leaned against the chilly bark, needing a moment to collect myself.
Frosty air raced over my face, but I took it in, forcing oxygen into my lungs.
Relax, Lexi. I had to fucking relax. So you let Killian finger you in the middle of a fancy ball?
Big deal... So his stepfather caught you with his dick in your mouth? No biggie.
Fuck. My. Life.
I just had to stick to my guns and never let it happen again. Easy peasy.
A shadow darted across my peripheral vision, and I peered out from behind the old willow. A figure in a gray t-shirt and a dark hoodie sprinted across the quad. Even beneath the hood, I could just make out the familiar nose and glasses poking out.
“Micah!” I shouted.
He stopped and spun around, something like fear crossing his face.
“Hey! Wait up.” I marched toward my friend, repeating my lame apology over and over in my head. I’d practiced it a dozen times in bed as I lay there unable to sleep for shit, the framed picture of my mom staring down at me from the nightstand in disappointment.
When I finally reached him, he pulled the hoodie down farther over his head and grabbed my hand. “Not here,” he hissed.
“What?”
His fingers tightened around my own, and he towed me back to the edge of the quad, near the cluster of ancient willows.
“What’s wrong with you?” I wriggled out of his strangling hold when he finally stopped.
His eyes were wild, all the warmth I was accustomed to zapped right out of the golden hazel. “Nothing, I just—” He snapped his jaw shut and paced a tight circle behind the big tree.
“Micah, if this is about the other night, I can explain. I’m so sorry I bailed...”
His lip curled in disgust, and fear lanced through my ribs. Shit, he really was pissed. “I saw you with Killian,” he gritted out.
Oh gawd, no. Nausea crawled its way up my throat.
Please tell me he did not see me on my knees.
I snagged my lower lip between my teeth, considering.
If I told him why I’d sucked him off, I’d sound no better than a whore.
Sure, he hadn’t actually paid me in money, but the deal was to cover my half of the trip. A high-end whore, but still.
“Micah, please let me—”
He shook his head, and I didn’t think I’d ever get that look of disgust twisting his lips out of my head. He was right. I was disgusting. For allowing Killian to do those things to me, for doing those things to him, and for liking both.
Even right now, my blood hummed at the vivid memories, at the feel of his hot lips, his hands ghosting over me...
“I don’t care about that right now.” Micah dragged his hand through his hair. “I mean, I do. The idea of you and that asshole together—” His lips screwed into a pucker. “But I have other shit to worry about.”
I finally looked at him, really looked at him, and dread pooled in my gut. Dark shadows tinged the soft skin beneath his eyes, and he was at least a shade paler than normal.
“What’s wrong?”
“The secret society thing... it’s real,” he whispered.
“You mean at Sigma Delta?”
“Shh!” He pressed a finger to his lips, then glanced around nervously. “The things they made me do...” He blanched, his face growing even more white. “And the things they still want me to do, Lexi... There’s no fucking way I can do it, but if I don’t—”
“So don’t,” I barked.
He shushed me again, clapping his hand across my mouth this time.
A beat of silence.
Then the hair at my nape prickled.
“Get your fucking hands off her!” A deep growl sent my heart kicking at my ribs.
Killian appeared from behind the tree and smacked his palms into Micah’s chest. The crack echoed across the grove. My friend flew backward and smashed into a nearby giant tree.
“Killian!” I screamed.
Micah slid down the trunk, his knees wobbling until he hit the hard-packed earth. Killian loomed over him and squeezed his fingers into a fist.
“Stop it! He didn’t do anything!” I gripped Killian’s bicep and jerked him back. “What the hell is wrong with you?”
Deep green irises seared to mine, the storm of emotions so violent, I sucked in a breath from their raging intensity. “I told you to stay the fuck away from him, didn’t I? Why the hell don’t you ever listen to me?”
“And… I–I told you he’s my friend,” I stammered.
A sharp laugh fled through his clenched teeth. “You’re so blind, Red. You have no idea of the depraved monsters surrounding you.”
“I’d never hurt her,” Micah muttered, pushing his glasses back up the bridge of his nose from his spot on the cold ground.
Killian whirled on him, and a murderous glare flashed across those cold eyes. “Really? And what about that girl the other night?”
Micah blanched, his skin so pale, a light green tinged his freckles. “I didn’t—”
“But you would have,” Killian snarled. “Don’t pretend otherwise. I was there. I saw the look in your eyes.”
“What the fuck are you two talking about?” I was definitely missing something here.
“Don’t worry about it, little Red. Just trust me when I say I’m not the only big bad wolf you need to stay away from.” The violence in his eyes was palpable, raw fury consuming all the light.
I reached for him instinctively before pulling my hand back. “Calm down, Kill. No one is going to hurt me.”
“That’s where you’re wrong. You’re so damned wrong.” Killian huffed out a breath and spun toward the auditorium. After a few long strides, he whirled back around with a murderous look that even I couldn’t argue with. “Sit with me in class. I’ll be on the right side. We have a trip to plan.”
Fuck. For a glorious second, I’d forgotten all about it.
I crouched down in front of Micah and offered a hand. “Are you okay?”
He shook his head, his eyes cast down to the icy ground. “I’m not sure I’ll ever be anymore.”
“What happened the other night at the Sigma Delta house?”
His lips pressed into a harsh line, and a chill raced up my spine. “I can’t tell you.”
“Then how can I help you?”
His head whipped back and forth, misery carving into his expression. “You can’t. Don’t you get it? We’re both fucked either way.”
I crept into the auditorium, searching the right side for Killian. I couldn’t believe I was going out of my way to find the jerk after working so hard to avoid him all weekend. But the asshole was right, we needed to plan this trip, and the sooner we got it over with, the better.
Because I had more important things on my mind. I had to figure out what was going on with Micah. Something had scared the shit out of him, and now I was terrified too.
“Psst, over here, Red.” My head swiveled over my shoulder to the far, right corner of the auditorium. Damn, Killian sure didn’t want to be seen with me. He couldn’t possibly have picked a more hidden location. There was an entire empty row between us and the next live person.
I slid through the empty row and took the seat beside him as the professor started the lecture.
“I’ll keep it quick today, guys,” Professor Kennedy announced. “I want you to use the majority of the period for independent work on your Tectonic Plate project.”
Excited whoops echoed around the massive space.
How had Killian known we’d be working on it today?
Damned Davenports probably had the inside scoop on everything. No wonder Killian had straight A’s, and I’d never seen him so much as crack open a book. My former best friend had always been smart, but he’d never applied himself. He’d never really cared to.
I forced my attention back to the lecture, doing my best to get Killian out of my head.
But despite my best efforts, his proximity was doing dangerous things to my body.
His forearm rested on the desk, that creepy tattoo curling up the inside of his arm, and still, I couldn’t resist the urge to touch it.
To run my finger, or my tongue, across the dagger and freaky serpent.
Goddammit, what was wrong with me?
Tearing my gaze away from him, I concentrated on Professor Kennedy’s words. They all blurred in the background, drowned out by my quickening pulse. Killian stretched out his leg, and his foot brushed my calf.
I froze.
When had he taken his shoes off?
His soft sock breezed up my leg as he ever so casually moved to cross it over his knee, before settling on my thigh.
His toes inched closer, dangerously close to the hem of my tight sweater dress.
Warmth pooled in my traitorous pussy. I didn’t dare glance over at him, because I knew exactly what I’d see.
I could already feel the smirk spreading across that perfect mouth.
Shooing away my lusty vixen, I smacked his foot off.
His dark chuckle raised the hair on the back of my neck. Asshole. I turned my body away from him and opened my textbook, forcing my eyes to the page.
After the quick lecture, the professor moved off stage, and a thick silence stretched between us as the rest of the room erupted into conversations.
Killian’s heavy gaze was on me, but I refused to meet it.
With the earlier encounter with Micah lingering in my thoughts, I hadn’t had a chance to focus on the awkwardness between us.
Not anymore. Now, fiery heat surged below my belly button.
I squeezed my eyes shut, banishing the steamy memories. But all I saw was Killian. Those emerald green eyes, the intensity in that piercing stare as he licked my arousal from his fingers. Damn, it had been the hottest thing I’d ever seen. No one had ever done that before.
I hazarded a quick glance from my peripheral and caught the heavy rise and fall of Killian’s chest. His hand snaked out, wrapped around my thigh and hauled me closer. A high-pitched squeal burst from my lips as I hit the edge of my chair.
“What are you doing?” I hissed.
“You need a better angle to see my screen, Red. Relax.” He tilted his laptop toward me, a feral grin curling the corners of his lips.
Based on the hungry look in his eyes, I knew I wasn’t the only one affected.
“I think we should go here.” He pointed at an image of a gorgeous tropical getaway with white sand beaches and over-the-water bungalows sitting in crystal blue seas.
“No way I can afford that,” I gritted out.
He cocked a dark brow. “I’m sure we can find a way for you to pay me back.” His hand slipped up my thigh, and the breath caught in my throat.