Chapter 19
Ithrow on my red longcoat and head out into the cold morning. I’m furious enough that I could uproot a thousand trees.
Knowing exactly what to do with this anger, I stalk across the snowy castle grounds and make my way toward the king’s stables, ready for a fight with Colden Moeshka. If there’s anything I know about my king, it’s that he’d rather die than leave those he loves to suffer alone.
Unfortunately for him, I’m not one to allow those I love to place themselves in danger.
I glance southward. Men and women sit high in the watch towers, eyes sharp, their bows and arrows ready.
To the west and north, the village is busier than usual. We witches sensed the intrusion in Frostwater Wood the moment the first invader crossed through the trees our magick protects, so everyone in Winterhold has been warned.
I believe Colden when he says the invaders are from the Eastland Territories and led by the Prince of the East. He’s never seemed more certain of anything—nor more worried—thus strategic preparations are underway should an army of Eastlanders reach our lands.
I’m going to do everything within my power to make sure that doesn’t happen.
People watch as I cross the road between the castle and the stable, throw the doors open, and march inside. I plant my fists firmly on my hips, a move that makes me feel like my mother as I pass stall after stall, my boot heels clacking on the wooden planks.
Colden stands at the far end of the building, saddling his horse with his back to me. “Could you walk any louder, Bloodgood?”
I stop a few strides away, nostrils flaring. “I’ll walk as loudly as I please, especially when I’m angry.”
He keeps working, tightening the saddle’s billet straps, though he spares me a glance, looking me over, from windblown curls to snowy boots.
He flashes a mischievous smile. “Ooh, wonderful. I like it when you’re mean.”
I stomp my foot. “Colden! Do you really think I’m going to let you go back out there?”
After a long moment, he finally—if slowly—turns around and crosses his arms over his chest. “I fear you’re in no condition to stop me, love.”
I jerk my head back. “No condition? If you remember, I just built possibly the largest and most complex construct that any Witch Walker has ever created. Believe me, love, if I want to keep you here, I can.”
He waggles his eyebrows. “Mmm, now you’re just teasing me. You know how much I enjoy being tied up.”
I give him my most serious glare and aim a finger at him. “Stop it, right now. I mean it. Don’t do that.”
“Don’t do what?” he says with an innocent shrug that isn’t innocent at all.
The tilted smirk I love forms across his full lips as he closes the distance between us, his usual swagger accentuating each step. In one swift move, he wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me against him.
I try to remain stiff, armoring myself with irritation, but…this is Colden.
I smack his chest. “I’m not playing around. You cannot go looking for Alexus. You just got here. He wouldn’t even let you ride into the valley with him. What makes you think he’d want you riding out to meet the enemy alone?”
He arches his eyebrow even higher, but any forced playfulness vanishes from his expression.
“That was before he became trapped in a construct with your sister and an army of bloodthirsty Eastlanders.” His voice falls to that hushed tone I know so well.
The one that means he’s being his truest self.
“I cannot leave him, Nephele. Much as I hate to say this, Neri did teach me some valuable lessons when we fought in the Land Wars. ‘Never leave a fellow soldier behind’ was one of them. And besides. Alexus is a part of me. You know this.”
I press my hands to his cheeks and stare into his dark eyes. “I also know you cannot deliver yourself into the Prince of the East’s hands. Is that what you want? For him to take you?”
The look that flashes across Colden’s face is one I’ve seen before, but I can’t fully place it. In it I see pain—the devastating, heartbreaking kind.
He swallows hard. “No, that isn’t what I want, but this is far more complicated than you realize, Nephele.”
“What I realize is that you and Alexus will both be safer if you stay here. Please. Let me handle the construct. If I think Alexus and Raina are getting too close to the Eastlanders, I’ll figure out a way to help them.”
“Like you did at the lake?” He shakes his head. “Deny it all you want, but I know what those deaths did to you. What they’re still doing to you. And it will only get worse.”
“I’m denying nothing.”
But Colden is. He tries so hard to hide his emotions. When the situation at the lake happened, he paced the floors until it was over. I knew exactly what I was doing and why, but some part of him didn’t like it in the least.
“It’s better if I take care of them now than for you to endure more slaughter,” he says. “I know more death isn’t something you want on your hands.” He grinds his teeth, and his eyes shift from side to side, the muscles in his jaw rippling. “It’s my fault anyway. The prince is here for me.”
I grip his chin and force him to look at me. “Stop thinking like that. And no, more death isn’t what I want, just like it isn’t what you want, but we may not have a choice. The Eastlanders are the ones who broke the treaty, Colden. We’re defending ourselves.”
I sound so resolute and unbothered, but the truth is that the thought of murdering more Eastlanders makes me sick. I’ve barely slept since I broke that lake wide open to prevent my sister from catching up to a band of the prince’s warriors.
I’m no seer like Raina, and I’m glad, but I can sense people inside a construct, and I have an awareness of certain emotions, like fear, desperation, and even death.
I didn’t know the Eastland warriors who died, but I’ve re-lived every moment of their suffering as they drowned beneath the ice, telling myself the loss was necessary.
I couldn’t let them remain so close to my family.
“This is what Alexus trained the Witch Walkers of Winterhold for,” I remind Colden. “Our entire purpose is to protect the Northlands and the people of this village.” I clutch the lapels of his blue velvet coat, bringing him closer. “And you. Our job is to protect you, Colden. Let us.”
“I’m not defenseless,” he says. “And I’m tired of being treated like some sacred entity when I’m nothing of the sort. What I am is a Northlander who was given power over ice and frost by a foolish god. I can stop the prince, Nephele. But you have to let me.”
I shake my head, fighting back tears. “I’m asking you to stay for me.
I’ve already lost my father, and now I don’t know where my mother is or if she’s even alive.
Raina is grieving, and all I can do is wonder why.
And I’m working so hard to keep track of her and Alexus, but you have no idea how difficult that is.
When I try to locate them, it’s like searching for two heartbeats amid a cacophony of vibrations ringing in my head.
If you go out there, I’ll be searching for your heartbeat, too.
” I press my hand to the center of his chest. “I cannot lose everyone I love, Colden, and I cannot manage Winterhold alone. Please don’t do that to me. ”
A deep sigh leaves him, and his body relaxes, his strong shoulders falling. Now I sense real defeat.
“You’re far more capable than you believe, but fine, I’ll stay for the night at least.” He taps my nose. “But if I do, you must promise me that you’ll rest. You cannot go on like this.”
“Only if you rest with me, because there’s no chance I’m letting you out of my sight.”
A weak smile struggles across his lips as he shakes his head. “You’re such a mother.”
I rise on my tiptoes and give him a peck on the lips. “I take that as a compliment.”
Together, we leave the stables and head back to the castle. I trust Colden in all things, except moments like this. If worry and guilt succeed in consuming his thoughts, he will disappear without a word.
But for now, I have him, and I’m going to try my best to keep him here.
Inside, we head to the castle library and peek around the door. Two dozen witches lounge around the three-story room—resting, reading, or lost in meditation.
We’re all different when it comes to vast magick.
Some require absolute silence to concentrate and thus remain in their bedchambers.
Others thrive off connecting with other witches.
Regardless, all the Witch Walkers in Winterhold are tapping into a construct I built, helping to keep the structure strong while searching for vulnerabilities.
Their magick slides along the threads, like fingers plucking the strings of a harp—and I’m the harp.
Colden takes my hand and pulls me away, leading me toward the kitchen. He pushes the door open, revealing a massive spread of food across the worktable. The head maidservant, Rowena, a dear friend of mine, has prepared a massive breakfast for everyone. I love how her name reminds me of my father.
“You’ve outdone yourself, Rowena,” I tell her as she sets two plates of ham, poached eggs, and various breads before us.
“Truly,” Colden says to the woman as he pulls his plate closer. “You are an absolute gift.”
“Just taking care of my children,” she says with a wink of her gray eye.
My appetite has been nonexistent the last few days, but I manage to eat before Colden and I clear away our dishes and turn to head upstairs.
“Nephele needs to sleep, so I’m taking her to bed,” Colden tells Rowena. “No disturbances unless absolutely necessary, please.”
Her white cheeks grow pink. “Of course, Your Majesty. Don’t wear her out, though. Our girl needs her energy.”
Colden feigns shock. “Why Rowena, I would never! I’m her king!”
Rowena laughs. It isn’t as if the entire village doesn’t know how close Colden and I have become over the last several years. We’re the best of friends—with the very best of benefits.
In my bedchambers, I undress down to my shift. Colden leaves his tunic and braies on, and we crawl underneath the covers.
“I hate sleeping with you in the winter,” I say, even as I snuggle against him, my head on his cold chest.
He pulls a fur blanket over me. “This was your request. Good thing you’ve got all that magick stirring inside you. We’ll both be warm as a winter’s hearth in no time.”
Colden’s usual sarcastic tone isn’t present. Instead, I hear worry behind his words.
I brush my fingers across his face as I slide my leg along his calf, hoping to share my warmth. “Thank you for staying.”
He tucks an errant curl behind my ear and kisses my forehead. A certain tenderness he always shows me reveals itself. “You certainly don’t make leaving easy.”
“This is nothing.” I wink. “Imagine if you’d actually left. I’d already planned to command a tall, powerful tree to capture you and bring you back to the castle.”
He just smiles, though it doesn’t really reach his eyes. “Stop devising ways to humiliate me and go to sleep.”
I try. So does Colden, but I know he’s wide awake and staring at the ceiling.
After an hour of failed attempts, I give up and send my mind where I promised him it wouldn’t go.
I check the construct for my sister.
Once I find her, I jerk up, my heart racing. Something is very wrong. I can’t tell what exactly, but Raina and Alexus are in danger from more than the cold. I sense mistrust in Alexus. Nervousness in Raina. And…someone else is there.
Something.
Colden sits up behind me. “Are you okay?”
I want to tell him the truth, but I can’t. I fear he’ll only use it as an excuse to finally leave this time.
“Bad dream,” is all I say as I let him draw me back down to the bed.
He wraps me in his arms, rubbing circles on my back, and I stay there, listening to his heartbeat as I secretly scour the construct until I locate my sister again. Whatever this danger is, Raina and Alexus are surrounded by it, and it isn’t the Eastlanders.
A shudder quivers through me as I grasp what it is I’m sensing, pulsing against the threads of my magick.
Pure unbridled malevolence.