CHAPTER FIVE
“I cannot fucking wait to get out of here.” Grant whines, laying flat on the little cot they set out for us. “Wrangled up in some room like a damn dog.”
Nadine shrugs, her body on top of his. “It’s really not that bad.” Her finger is idly playing with the silver ring around his finger, but I’m surprised the cot hasn’t collapsed under their combined weight.
The guest room, if you can call it that, is basically the same as the living room. Minimal furniture, peeling blue polkadot wallpaper, and a few cots sort of just tucked into each corner. Better than sleeping on the floor, though.
“Relax, Nico,” Frank teases, standing near the window. “We’re just having a sleepover with America’s scariest family. I mean fuck—what is wrong with these people?”
Levi giggles at that. “I’m saying. Like here Toro—here boy! A guy that big should not be fucking mute. It’s scary as hell.”
I don’t even get to say anything, because the minute I open my mouth Grant is immediately silencing me. “No, Nico. Don’t defend them. You know it’s weird as fuck.”
“Yeah,” Frank adds, “he’s gonna come grab you in the middle of the night and lock you in the basement for giving him those cookies. Hope you’re ready to be Toro’s special boy.”
“Okay…” Nadine glares at him, tugging on Grant’s arm. “Be nice. Nico is just being nice. You know how it is.”
Levi perks up. “Actually, I don’t. How is it, exactly?” Of course he wouldn’t. We’re not close, to be honest. I’m not close with any of them except Nadine. She’s different. The closest thing I have to a best friend, even if we’ve never really put a label on our friendship.
She glances back at me, brown eyes giving me a pitiful look that I don’t appreciate whatsoever. She’s the only person I ever told about the way I grew up, so I know she won’t—
“He just grew up kind of… ugly, you know?”
My heart drops into my stomach when the words leave her mouth.
Frank snorts, eyes darting between the two of us as if she’s lying. “No way? Nico? Ugly? I don’t know if I can believe that.”
“He was! He really was!” Nadine laughs like she doesn’t remember how I nearly teared up telling her about it when we first became friends. “He showed me pictures and everything. He was way bigger, and he didn’t know how to style his hair… and the acne…”
To my surprise it’s Grant of all people who seems to pick up on how much I am not enjoying this conversation. “Uh, Nade… Maybe you shouldn’t…”
Nadine blinks, turning to me. Her expression softens, so I guess I wasn’t doing as good a job hiding my emotions as I thought. “No, Nic… I’m just teasing you, you know? Like we all do? I swear, it’s not… It’s fine.”
“It’s…” Not fine. Not okay. Not nice. But I can’t say any of that. I just swallow the negative emotions down, taking a shaky breath. “It’s whatever. Yeah. I used to stick out. I didn’t really have friends. That’s why…”
Of course Frank has to chime in. “That’s why you’re pretending to give a shit about this family? They remind you of your past?”
“No!” My voice raises a little. “It’s not… I’m not pretending! Do you guys seriously not have any empathy? Just—at all!?”
My friends are quiet, all wide eyes and shocked faces like they haven’t been provoking me since we stopped at the gas station.
“They’re letting us stay at their house, letting us eat their food. They can’t just fucking order Uber when they run out of groceries, you know? They are different, and that’s perfectly fine!”
Frank groans at my outburst, crossing his arms. “You done? Don’t be pathetic, Nico.”
“Frank…” Grant’s tone is gentler now, but I know what he’s hiding: pity. Like a tick burrowing into my skin. Pity in every form. Making me feel so pathetic and so small.
Something inside of me is getting ready to snap. I let my eyes fall shut, taking in the deepest breath I can. “I’m not going to argue with you guys. I’m just going to go get some fresh air.”
“Wait, Nico!” Nadine calls from behind me, but I don’t even acknowledge it. I push open the door to the guest room, finding myself face to face with the three brothers. My brow furrows, and I gulp instinctively.
My voice is barely louder than a whisper, words failing to come out. “Uh…”
“Where ya goin’?” Damien asks, nudging Lucio’s side again.
That’s a question I don’t even really know the answer to. “Just… for a walk. I… need some fresh air.” It’s not a lie, I need some fresh air and some space from my friends.
“Alrighty.” He doesn’t pester further. “We were just comin’ to check on y’all before we head to bed. Try to be quiet on your way in, ‘kay?”
As he steps out of the way I can only let out a weak noise of affirmation. “Uh-uh.” Damien and Lucio walk past me, but Toro’s hand shoots out to grab my forearm. I glance up at him, my face all misty-eyed and stupid looking.
His expression softens alongside his grip on me, brows pushed together as his lip quivers slightly. It’s almost like he wants to say something but he doesn’t know how. Damien smacks his hand away, a scowl on his face.
“Leave ‘im alone, Toro.” He flashes me that signature smile. “Sorry. Go have a nice walk, Nico.”
I awkwardly scratch behind my ear, averting my gaze to the floor. I excuse myself, scurrying down the stairs as they squeal and whine with each step. Everything just feels a little overwhelming, and only when I step out into the night air does my mind ease up a bit.
Still not cold, but definitely more tolerable than it was before. I sigh, letting myself whimper quietly. I should’ve just kept my mouth shut. Now all my friends are pissed at me and the ride home is going to be the most awkward experience of my life.
My legs move on their own, walking down the beaten path that’ll take me to god knows where.
It’s mostly just fields, although there are a few gangly trees out in the distance.
I doubt I’ll walk that far. There’s a barn and some kind of shed, and even a couple fenced areas for plants and animals alike.
I find myself walking over to where the pigs are, keeping a reasonable distance because I’m definitely not afraid one is going to jump over the fence and chase me.
There’s something wet and red in their trough, and they seem to be enjoying it since they’re gulping it down like a last meal.
I never really thought about what pigs eat until now.
The sky above me is a fleeting blue, so many stars just waiting to be counted. I can barely believe it, back home it’s nothing but clouds and clear skies. Not having light pollution does wonders for stargazing. The moon is full, shining brighter than I’ve ever seen it before.
It’s such a pretty sight that I have to dig for my phone in my pocket, pulling it up to aim at the sky. My finger hovers over the capture button, but before I press it I hear the most bloodcurdling scream of my entire life. My phone falls to the dirt before a loud crunch fills the air.
“Fuck…” I mutter, kneeling down to pick it up. It’s so cracked a piece of the screen falls off and onto the grass. I have no clue what to do with all that, so I just shove it in my pocket and begin making my way back to the house.
I think the scream was Nadine’s, which means she was either making a big deal over a rat or Grant was tickling her. Just the thought of spending the night in the room with them is bothering me.
Of course I’m dumb enough to drop my phone and break it. As if having no car and no signal wasn’t bad enough, now when we do get a signal I won’t have a stupid phone to use it on.
Dirt and gravel crunch underneath my converse sneakers, each step bringing me closer to the house.
As I step up onto the porch, the sound of shoes thudding against old wood becomes a lot more noticeable.
It’s loud, and before I get a chance to even process what the hell is going on I see a figure charging at the door full speed.
I barely have time to react, throwing myself to the side of the porch before Levi comes tumbling out. He’s screaming bloody murder, and Damien is hot on his tail. My jaw drops, a hand instinctively moving to cover my mouth as Levi tumbles to the ground with a cry.
My legs won’t move. My body is frozen. Damien is looming over him with both hands firmly planted on the wooden handle of an ax. The blood dripping from the sharp blade isn’t lost on me, but I can’t really focus on that when he raises it up high into the air…
…and swings it down right on Levi’s head.