Chapter 2
Oden
Driving back and forth between home and Chicago was wearing on me, but I didn’t have a problem with it for the most part, especially since it was for my baby girl.
This morning Aja had some type of fucking recital, so I was on the road at six and I got to the recital just in time to see her perform.
She was perfect, the best part of me in this life and probably the next one.
I didn’t deserve her, but she was mine, so for the rest of her and my lives I’d make up for what she lost at my hands.
“But Dad, I don’t understand why I can’t go to the arcade with Sabastian. He’s my be?—”
“He ain’t your shit, Aja. Stop playing with me. Go in there and help your auntie with the food and let me talk to your father, ” Kinga answered before I could. His beef with a tween was the funniest shit I had encountered in a while.
I chuckled, eyes finding my baby girl all dressed up in her Sunday best at her auntie’s insistence since she had a recital today.
She cut her eyes at her uncle before storming from the patio into the house to do as she was told.
For the most part Aja spent two to three nights with me, but the rest here with her uncle and auntie.
I loved my daughter, but I knew being with them gave her stability and a two-parent household.
Not only that but I in no way wanted to force the way I lived on her.
After everything happened with Ashley, my mind broke.
It shattered in a way I didn’t know how to come back from, because the realization that I was living at someone else’s standards instead of my own hit me right after she was no longer here.
We lived lavish, big house designer brands and everything, a complicated life I didn’t yearn for.
I did it for her though. I did it because I loved her and was willing to do whatever to please her.
In the end sacrificing my desires and comfort got me nothing but a superficial marriage and guilt that was sometimes too heavy to bear.
“The fuck you laughing for? I told you I don’t trust that friend shit.
It’s bad enough Harlem’s hard headed ass let him come to her birthday party.
” Kinga’s voice interrupted my thoughts.
His face was all balled up like that was a recent event.
The damn birthday party was two months ago and he still hadn’t let that shit go.
“You. You’re going to bust a fucking vessel stressing over a fucking thirteen- or fourteen-year-old’s intentions.”
He shook his head and drank from his beer. “Fuck that.”
I shook my head. “What are you gonna do when the twins grow up?”
“Same thing I've been doing. Stand on business and send a few slugs if anybody gets hard of hearing. I think I’ma get a shotgun and learn that one warning shot bullshit they be saying. ”
I laughed hard as hell because his stupid ass was serious and random. “Man, you need help.”
“You right, I do. But it is what it is.” He was mugged up, shit until Harlem walked out holding his twin. Kysler’s arms were open the moment she saw her father.
“Brooklyn is asleep, so please get the troublemaker so I can finish cooking dinner.”
He laughed and grabbed Kysler. “C’mon, daddy’s baby.”
“And why do you keep giving Aja a hard time? She is only ten. Her mind is not on any of the things you’re obsessing over. Sabastian is just her friend.” Harlem mugged Kinga then me.
When I first came back, it was odd to see my brother in love.
I never saw that on Kinga, but Harlem brought out something different in him, making him better every day.
Not only that but just her presence and what she brought to his life reminded him of what he had to lose if he played fast and loose out in these streets.
For years I tried to get him to understand that, but he never got it, maybe because I wasn’t who was sent to teach him.
She was, and she loved him unconditionally in a way that healed that grumpy inner child who didn’t have a mother or father.
She loved him through it all, never trying to change him.
Shit, she married the crazy ass nigga. Harlem was a godsend though, because not only that but she was a huge part in my daughter’s life.
She was that maternal figure Aja needed.
That one she could talk to about things I damn sure didn’t need to hear about.
I immediately threw my hands up in surrender. “Nah sis, that wasn’t me. I told him the shit is harmless, but he got beef with the lil boy.”
“You would too if the lil nigga called you Old School while tryna mack in front of you. Neither of y’all were there.”
I laughed and so did Harlem.
“Baby you’ve had beef with this little boy for what? Two years?”
“See, nah. I don’t have beef with him. I got beef with the fact that y’all don’t see the game. Lil nigga is slick.”
I laughed, shaking my head then focusing on my niece. She was the perfect mixture of both her mother and father, but she tended to look like whatever parent she was near at the time.
“I told you, you’re thinking about how you were at that age and putting it on him. He’s a private school tween, how bad could he be?” Harlem asked.
“And y’all are underestimating him.” Kinga’s rebuttal had me laughing even harder.
When I finally made it home from my brother’s house I was greeted with quiet, well maybe not complete quiet, but enough to have me settling in for just a second before I moved into my closet to change.
While doing so I couldn’t help but think about the chocolate beauty from the other night.
From the moment I first laid eyes on her in the main dining hall I knew who she was.
Even after I met her at the pool party I couldn’t keep my eyes off of her.
The entire time I had her in my kitchen, I fought the urge to touch or talk to her the way I wanted.
I settled for feeding her instead, and soon she got the program, opening those sexy ass lips and accepting what I was giving.
With my phone and keys in my hand, I stalked toward the front of my home, knowing I needed to check on my garden and do some harvesting. I was about to slide my phone into my pocket when I decided two days had been long enough to not have hit her up.
I went through my recent calls and found Jade’s number. Her number had a Chicago area code, so it was easy to spot. I clicked a message to open a thread. Once I had it open, I began to type.
Me: You up for letting me feed you again? This time with an intended date/time and not by chance.
I looked over my corny ass message before shaking my head. Shit already said delivered, so nah I couldn’t unsend it. I ended up saving her number before pressing the side button to sleep the phone.
I slipped my phone into my pocket and moved toward the door.
My next day to cook at Adjacent was the day after tomorrow, so I needed to see what I had, so I could choose what would go on the special menu.
The special menu was basically chef’s recommendations aka a meal I cooked and prepared.
It was an intentional meal while shit like burgers and chips were just made.
I had nothing against the people who ordered them, but in my eyes, you didn’t come into a restaurant and pay to experience the nights Kie and Lois carefully curated to eat a damn burger.
It irritated me. Kie was the curator and person in charge of managing the events for Adjacent while Lois was the manager.
Lois I had known for fifteen plus years and Kie six.
They were married and good friends of mine who handled most of the business, allowing me to be as present or absent as I needed.
They were good friends, folks I never had to worry about bullshit with.
I went for the ripe heirloom tomatoes first, knowing a garden salad would probably be on the horizon, but I needed some sort of dressing with a spice and some nuts. I wanted to add texture to what would normally be somewhat flat.
My thoughts were interrupted by a vibration in my right pocket. My hand immediately dug in to grab it. When I had my phone in my grip, I pulled it out and looked at it. It was a response from Jade.
Jade: Depends on what and where you’re trying to feed me.
I couldn’t help the grin that formed on my lips. Not one to do all that texting shit, I hit the FaceTime icon at the top right of the screen next to her name.
She answered immediately, bringing that beautiful ass face into the camera. Her hair was pulled up into a bun out of her face, showing every single feature of hers that I tried not to bore into while we were at the restaurant and in my truck the other day.
“Are you outside? Why can I barely see you?” she asked, peering into the phone like one of those bad ass kids asking if you had games.
“Yeah. I’m checking on my garden. Are you a picky eater, Jade?”
“Um no. I think we established I wasn’t at your restaurant. Did you not spend a portion of the night hand feeding me some of everything?”
“Not everything and I enjoyed it.”
She smiled. “As did I.”
“Then don’t tell me it depends. Tell me when you are free so I can feed you then, beautiful.”
She giggled. “You’re such a smooth talker, Mr. West. But no, I don’t turn down food, so how about Friday?”
“Hope the meal isn’t what has you taking me up on my offer.”
“Of course not. It’s the fact that you’re feeding it to me too.” She winked, making my shit brick instantly. “Now can you show me your garden? I’m intrigued.”
“’Bout what, love? It’s just a garden,” I responded, half not expecting her to be remotely interested. She didn’t strike me as the type.
“No, it’s more than that. It’s peaceful. When I was younger my granny used to have one. I hated that she made me help her with it, but now as an adult I remember it being the most serene place to exist. It was happiness on earth.” She smiled into the camera, eyes twinkling.
I lifted the phone and flipped the camera to show her. She was right about the serenity. It was everything needed to calm even the most racing mind. This space was necessary because it was truly calm in a world of chaos.
She beamed. “Just beautiful. Do you own the lake behind you as well?”
I nodded as if she could see me. “Yeah. It felt like it completed the property.”
She nodded. “So how long I gotta be your friend before you invite me over for lunch in the garden and a tour?” Damn, this woman was different. She had the type of energy that would stiff even the toughest. She was confident and knew what she wanted even though she came off shy at first.
I flipped the camera back to me. “How about we talk about that over dinner Friday?”
“Great. I’m looking forward to it.”
“Good. What are you doing right now?” I didn’t want to get off the phone with her, so I started a whole other conversation.
“Honestly nothing. I feel like I should be working, but when I walked in the door, I poured a glass of wine and got comfortable on my couch for the evening. Kinda been pushing the limit a lot these days.”
“Why?” I sat my phone on the dirt and began to harvest the bell peppers I deemed ready.
“The grand opening of my second location is rapidly approaching and I don’t want to half step. I want everything to be perfect. Well, maybe not perfect, because perfection doesn’t exist, but close.”
“Nah it doesn’t, but I understand. Give yourself grace though. I’m pretty sure you know your own formula and what to do instead of stressing yourself out, right?”
“Yeah, I do. When I opened my first boutique, I was heartbroken. My ex had cheated on me for the millionth time, I had just had a miscarriage and I felt like I was dying inside, so I threw myself into my dream. Probably too much information but what made it happen last time doesn’t exist within me anymore.
Months of journaling and open conversations with my grandmother made it impossible to carry. ”
Her vulnerability made me pause. Women like her were a breath of fresh air because they didn’t put up facades. They were brutally honest, even when it was at the sake of their own sanity. Women like her were rare, they didn’t come around every day.
“I’m sorr?—”
“Don’t be. Things happen and I’ve made peace with it.” A brief silence filled the phone before she spoke again. “I definitely didn’t mean to get that deep so soon, my apologies; it comes with the dark personality.”
I chuckled. “Get as deep as you need, sweetheart.”
She chuckled nervously as well. “Well, let's go back to the surface. What made you open a restaurant?”
“I’ve always wanted to cook. I found it extremely peaceful.
I didn’t want to own my own restaurant per se, but I knew I never wanted to work for anyone.
I knew for me to have my own freedom in that realm; I had to own the place.
” I moved myself, my phone, and the harvest basket to the overgrown zucchini plant.
She nodded. “I like that. And I’m assuming on the nights you cook, you curate your own menu as well.”
“Yeah. Comes off what’s fresh in the garden and my idea box at that time.”
She smiled. “Your idea box?”
“Yeah.” I had to laugh. “My daughter taught me that shit, stuck with me ever since.”
She laughed so hard I couldn’t help but look at her. Jade was a calm soul, so caught up in everything she needed to do for others that she often forgot about herself. Not only that but she was also a workaholic. I could tell all of that from just looking at her.
“How old is your daughter?”
“Ten.”
“You don’t look old enough to have a ten-year-old. How old are you?”
“Thirty-two,” I responded, watching her nod. Though I was supposed to be out here paying attention to the garden, I couldn’t help but pause every so often to look at her expression every time I answered one of her questions.
“Makes sense. You’re not that old.” She sipped from the glass of wine in her hands.
“Damn not that old, huh? I didn’t hear you offer me your age.” I knew not to ask a woman her age, but I still wanted to know. I felt like I needed to know any and everything Jade was willing to share.
She laughed. “Because I didn’t.”
“Damn, that’s fuc?—”
“Twenty-eight,” she responded before I could finish speaking.
I laughed. “See, that wasn’t hard at all.
” Jade and I talked for hours longer before I had to call her back because my daughter was calling.
Aja’s nosy ass would sit on the phone with me for hours, talking about absolutely nothing.
Per my new sister, she just wanted to hear my voice, which I understood.
My baby knew she could live with me any time, but she belonged with my brother in the two-parent household I had robbed her of.
Guilt always settled into my being, making it harder for me to be there as much as I should’ve.
She never lacked though, because even when I wasn’t there, Kinga’s ol’ grumpy ass showed up, and for that I was eternally grateful.