Chapter 5 #2
“I must go! I will not abandon Marissa. She puts up a tough front but she is probably terrified and you said that thing had orders not to harm me, but what happens when it figures out she is not me? No, I have to go, please help me!” I beg, gripping onto my sword for strength.
I look several of the gnomes in the eye before landing on Durga.
“You! You can take me! You came from there and you said so yourself that you were tasked to protect me!” I try to reason with her, remembering her vow to my dead mother.
I cannot return. Durga huffs and bows her head low. I step up to her and grasp her head, lifting her chin to make our eyes meet.
“Can you take me to The Gate?” I ask, looking straight into her big eyes and I can see a flash of what I can only assume is my mother in her memories, impossibly beautiful with her golden eyes and cascading ebony curls, asking her the same question years ago.
Her face is blurred, as if the memory is too distant to recall.
Durga nods her head gently and kneels in front of me, bowing down low.
“The sun will soon be setting my dear, at least stay the night with us to get your strength back,” Granny Mog reasons with me and I feel that a solid rest may be what I need before venturing into the unknown. So I nod and let them lead me to their caves.
There is already something delicious smelling, bubbling over the fire pit just outside the cozy entrance and my stomach does a little jump for joy, gurgling loud enough for everyone to hear.
Little boulder gnome children come rolling out to greet me, giggling as one grabs my newly healed arm and another takes my sword and waves it around in awe.
“Hey, I’m going to need that back you little rascal,” I tease, all tension already easing away as I am welcomed into the wholesome boulder gnome family. Maybe I should just stay here, the thought comes up but I quickly shove it aside, knowing I have a greater duty towards my own family.
I sleep deeply through the night with the deep rumbling of the snoring gnomes lulling me into a dreamless slumber.
The next morning I wake up to find a water vessel and a sheath for my sword crafted out of bark lying beside my pillow, a gift from one of the gnomes, too modest to take credit for the kind gesture.
I get up to see everyone else is already gone from the cave and gather up my gifts and stumble out into the bright sun.
“Ah, you’re awake. I did not want to disturb you, my dear,” I hear Granny Mog say, my eyes are still adjusting to the blaring light and all I see are blurry figures. It must be well into the morning which gives me a wave of panic.
“I have to get going. Thank you for your hospitality,” I say looking around for Durga and seeing her sitting in the middle of a group of gnome childlings that are playing with her hair.
“Before you go dear, I have something we found in the flowers years ago. I am sure she would have wanted you to have it.” Granny holds out a beautiful necklace with a pendant of a little golden eye with delicate feathers encircling it.
On closer inspection I notice it has a small, purple crystal gleaming in the iris.
“She left this for me? Thank you, truly,” I say, pushing back the tears that are threatening to overflow as she puts it around my neck, a piece of my mother that I could have never wished for.
The cool metal soon turns warm and I swear I hear it hum for a split second.
I look around but no one else seems to be reacting to the sound, must be hearing things.
Durga walks up to my side and kneels down for me to hop on.
Granny grabs my hand before I hop on. “Look for the boulder gnomes in the fae realm, my dear; they tend to the hills on the other side of the Tanglewoods. Tell them I sent you and they will give you guidance,” Granny instructs, and I can see tears threatening to spill down her stone cheeks.
I realize with a pang of guilt that she has probably had to mourn me once before.
I give her a tight hug and look into her kind eyes.
“Thank you for your help Granny, I am sorry I could not stay.” I give a nod to the gathered crowd before I hop on the back of Durga, taking a deep breath, having to steel my nerves as she fully stands up and starts trotting, taking us out of sight of the gnomes and onward to The Gate.
We ride on in silence for a while before questions start to plague my mind again.
“Let me down Durga, I want to walk,” I say, giving her mane a gentle stroke as she stops and kneels down so I can slide off her large back. As she stands I look her in the eye.
“Why can you not return to the fae realm? Will I be able to return to the human realm?” I ask, my unanswered question weighing heavy on my mind. We keep our eyes locked as we keep walking through the forest.
It is a very old curse that we no longer know the details of.
We, the fae, are taught as children that if we cross over we will be stuck forever.
We were told The Divine Mother Earth herself placed the curse upon us as punishment for our greed.
I had always believed it to be a tale told to keep children close but I have tried to return many times without success.
Durga explains, her voice sounding heavy and resigned in my head.
You were born in the human realm so can return to the fae realm but I am unsure whether you can cross back.
I have never known a fae to be born on this side. Durga admits.
Dread washes over me. I know I must search for Marissa but accepting that I may never return shatters a little piece of me. Is my home a place I am willing to leave forever? Why would Durga leave her home so willingly?
“Who were you to my mother Durga? Why did you sacrifice yourself for her?” I ask, trying to keep the pity off of my face.
I was her lady-in-waiting. She rescued me from a violent master that I had been traded to when I was a young foal.
He had a charm that kept me trapped in my morphed form and would use me as a workhorse on his lands.
I thought that was to be my horrible lot in life, until she freed me.
She took me to her home to live freely. I owed her my life.
When she first fell pregnant, her husband–your father, would not let her leave the house and I was cast out by the servants.
I was never even permitted to meet her husband.
He kept her locked in there and would not allow any visitors.
There was unrest amongst the court, fae were going missing and there was word of a rebellion against The King.
Perhaps he was shielding her from whatever danger there may have been but why he would not permit me to be with her, I do not know.
The next time I saw her, she was large with you in her belly and running from that same house, in fear.
Durga says, her strong voice cracking slightly at the memories.
I have so many questions but as I am about to ask more, we step into a sweeping meadow with wildflowers dancing in the breeze and tall green grasses that sing with the passing wind.
At the far side of the clearing there is a big hill that has a small cave at the base.
The mouth of the cave is so dark it seems to swallow all the light. A twinge of fear skitters up my spine.
“Is that The Gate?” I ask, swallowing down the lump that has formed in my throat.
Durga nods her head, snorting a huff of air through her nostrils.
We walk on through the meadow but when we are halfway across, Durga stops suddenly.
I look into her eyes and can hear her say, this is as far as I can go.
I nod and look forward, clasping onto my sword, feigning bravery. Am I ready for this?
I take a deep breath, “thank you for all you have done Durga, I hope to see you again. I have so much I want to ask you but I fear I've already spent too much time here. I have to find her…” I say, turning back to face her and giving her soft cheek a stroke.
Wait, one last piece of advice; beware of the Mists when you first enter into the realm. They will worm into your thoughts and memories. Just keep walking, whatever you do, do not stop.
I nod, taking on her advice but not entirely understanding what to expect.
I’m ready. I’m coming for you Marissa!
I take a deep breath to centre myself, then walk on. I start to run, hoping that the speed will help keep my nerves steady, but as I near the mouth of the cave I can feel my sword hand start to shake. I close my eyes and shield my face with my arms as I blindly sprint into the darkness.