Chapter 46
Silence followed in Kieron’s wake. Bex wiped the tears that were now freely trickling down her cheeks. And she wasn’t the only one. Even Gordon had removed his glasses to dab under his eyes.
‘I’m sorry.’ Bex choked out the words. ‘I didn’t mean for it to go like that. I just… I just…’
‘It’s fine,’ Gordon said softly. ‘You did the right thing here,’ he added, looking at Moira.
‘You both did the right thing.’ He paused, and before the silence settled fully, he turned to Duncan.
‘This is going to be a lot for you to take in. We’ll give you two some space.
’ Slowly, he helped Moira to standing, but rather than heading for the door, she moved across to Duncan and rested her hand on his arm.
‘It disnae change things, you know. The way your grandad – Angus – the way he loved you and your ma, it disnae change that.’
Duncan turned slightly and took the old woman’s hand in his own. No words, just touch. That was all he could manage.
‘We should leave them to it,’ Gordon said, touching Moira gently. A moment later, the pair left the room, closing the door gently behind them and leaving Bex and Duncan alone.
‘Did you know?’ she said, eventually. ‘Did you ever have any idea?’
He shook his head, but somewhere during the motion, it turned into a shrug.
‘He was a lonely old man, and I was a pretty lonely young man. I just thought that was all there was to it, really. You know, you might be wrong. My God, you’re gambling your chances with Kieron if you’re wrong about this.’
‘I never wanted any chances with Kieron.’ Bex took a step towards Duncan, only for his face to harden.
‘Right. You just kissed him for fun?’
‘I kissed him after I’d nearly frozen to death and you told me that it was a good thing that we split up,’ she replied.
‘You have no idea how what you said hurt me that day. And in case I’m mistaken, you’ve done a lot more than kiss someone since we split up?
’ The hurt sounded remarkably like anger in her voice.
With a deep breath in, she tried her best to swallow it back down.
This wasn’t the time to talk about them. Duncan had bigger things to deal with.
Once again, silence took hold. How was it that only half an hour ago, Bex had been there on the dancefloor, ready to tell Duncan that she loved him, that she would do whatever she needed to make this relationship work and now she couldn’t even find the strength to speak?
‘I’m sorry.’ Duncan inched towards her, his eyes locked on hers. ‘I meant all of it. I meant everything I said earlier today. You know I did.’
‘I know.’
‘And you might not have said it yet, but I’m pretty sure you still love me, too.’
He lifted her hands and interlocked their fingers.
She did. She loved him with every fibre of her body.
So much so that her heart ached. A full, all-consuming pain, for which she knew the cure was standing only feet away from him.
It would be so much easier to forget everything and lose herself in this moment. But she stopped him with her hand.
‘Don’t,’ she said. ‘Please don’t.’
His frown crinkled. ‘You don’t want this?’
A lump had lodged itself firmly in Bex’s throat, and swallowing did nothing to alleviate it. Still, she had to speak. ‘You have too much going on right now. Too much to think about. This, what you learned tonight. It’s gonna cloud your judgement. You don’t want to do anything you’ll regret.’
He let out a light laugh and brushed his thumb against her jawline. ‘The only thing I regret is not putting a ring on your finger and keeping you in my life forever.’
A stifled gasp choked in Bex’s throat. Was he saying what she thought he was saying?
Yes, there was no ambiguity in those words.
Duncan wanted to marry her. To be with her forever.
And wasn’t that what she wanted too? She knew it was.
Yet, as she opened her mouth to respond, Kieron’s words swirled in her head.
How she was just making a power-play to be the lady of the manor.
He had just raised a toast – his third toast of the entire meal – to her.
He had made it seem like they were a thing.
And the way they had danced together, straight after the meal?
She could hardly blame anyone if they’d jumped to that conclusion.
If she told Duncan she loved him now, that she wanted to be with him, then what would everyone in the village think?
That she had separated from him, only to suddenly find him more appealing now that he was worth millions?
That she had toyed with Kieron when she’d assumed he would inherit Highland Hall, then flipped back to Duncan when it turned out he was the rightful heir?
He would be a laughingstock. She couldn’t do that to him.
‘You’ve got bigger things to deal with,’ she said, stepping back and out of his grip and trying to ignore the chill that spread across her skin. ‘Your life’s going to change. And we don’t know if there’s even a place for me in it any more.’
‘What are you on about? There will always be a place for you. Always. Did you not listen to anything I said earlier?’
His gaze was locked on hers. His lips were only inches away.
‘I don’t think that’s enough,’ she said quietly. ‘It’s not right. I’m sorry. Honestly, I’m so, so sorry.’
Then, praying he couldn’t see the tears prick behind her eyes, she turned and walked away from the only man she’d ever truly loved.