Chapter Seven #2
As she sat at a desk with sketches before her, she paused, staring into space, remembering being in Blake’s arms, the laughter they had shared.
They had liked being together—it almost made her wish they could make a marriage work—but there was no way she could get past his efforts to get revenge.
That was a solid wall that would always divide them.
In spite of all common sense and absolute certainty that marriage to Blake would be a disaster, she couldn’t keep from thinking about him.
He had a forceful personality, and the attraction between them, the electrifying appeal that made him unique, was irresistible.
He could certainly turn on the charm, and they’d had a good time together.
With a sigh, she focused on the tasks for the day to try to move on.
Within the hour, she was lost in thoughts about Blake again. Common sense said she would get over missing him. That it was just a matter of time. Her heart was trying to tell her differently.
As the morning progressed, she kept busy, supervising placement of the new furniture and area rugs, the installation of the mirrors and new paintings.
Blake was in California, and she talked to him briefly on the phone at night because of questions about the house.
Each time she heard his voice, she felt a pang of longing that she tried to ignore.
They were cool with each other, remote, as if there had never been intimacy between them, and she suspected when the calls about the house ended, she wouldn’t have any contact with him for a while.
Finally, they were finished. Blake was due back on Friday, and Saturday morning she, as well as Eli, Lucinda and the contractor, were going to meet with him to go over the rooms. She was certain any party Blake had planned earlier wasn’t going to happen now.
While it wasn’t convenient to move her things, she didn’t want to stay on the ranch with him after the work was done, so she stayed in the small hotel in town. In her hotel room, she looked intently at herself in the mirror.
At two months her stomach was still flat and her waist had not changed plus her five-ten height might be the reason she didn’t see any change. So far, she felt well and had not had any morning sickness.
She had rented a car to drive to the ranch tomorrow.
She didn’t want to rely on Blake for anything—not transportation, food, lodging, companionship.
Her anger with him was a constant feeling.
She was certain he had not changed his mind in the least, and he would continue to insist they marry for all the wrong reasons.
It was simply something she would not do.
Friday afternoon in Dallas, Blake met Cade for lunch, sliding into a chair opposite his brother.
“Well, is the house finished?”
“Yes, and it looks great. I’ll have a party and you can come see. I was going to have a big party soon—you and the rest of the brothers, if Nathan and family are back, Sierra and her family, friends. I’ll have it, but it may be postponed for a time.”
“Are you leaving town?”
“Yes, but that isn’t why. The job is over, and I don’t know how much I’ll see of Sierra.”
Cade tilted his head. “Are you two dating each other?”
“Yes and no,” Blake said. “Yes, we were, but no, we’re not currently. But we’ll see each other some. We have some problems to work out.”
“House problems?”
Blake gazed at his half brother. He felt closer to Cade than anyone else he knew. He had to share his news. “Okay, this isn’t for public announcement, but maybe—oh, hell. She’s pregnant with my baby.”
“Kaboom,” Cade said, his eyes opening wide with a startled expression on his face. “Wow. Congratulations, I think. You don’t sound like a happy dad. I know you didn’t plan to marry this soon, but you said you expected to get hitched sometime. Just move it up.”
“That’s not the problem. The lady said no. We’re opposites in so many ways, and she doesn’t think we can ever truly make it work or fall in love. Her parents have this perfect union of like-minded individuals, and that’s what she wants. Plus, she is Miss Do-Good and wants me to be the same.”
Cade sputtered and tried to bite back a smile. “Sorry. You’re a nice guy, but not out to save the world.”
“No, I’m not, but I’m not an ogre. It’s this deal about my hotels and our dad that gets her.”
“Ah, the light dawns. She doesn’t know our dad. He’s no saint. His people will just dump the hotels and go on to something else, and he may never even know you were behind the loss in revenue.”
“Yeah, that’s what I’m starting to realize.”
“If she won’t marry, maybe you’re better off. Look at our dad and all his marriages—all disasters. Sierra’s folks are an exception. You may be fortunate she turned you down. She’s not going to try to keep you from your baby, is she?”
“Oh, no. She would never do that.”
“Well, then. I’d think you’d be a lot happier without a wife.
Stop and think about it. With your way with the ladies and your money and success—most women would be screaming for marriage.
They would be running to get a preacher before the words were out of your mouth.
Be glad, my brother. Besides, she could be right, you know.
If the two of you are opposites, why tie your lives more closely together?
You can still be a dad, and she’ll still be a mom, and each of you will find love with someone else. ”
“Why did I tell you about this?” Blake asked, frowning at Cade.
“To get some sound advice. Seriously, think about what she’s telling you.
You may be much better off without her in your life.
She’s sharing your child, letting you be dad, and that’s good.
An unhappy marriage isn’t great for a kid to grow up watching.
I can promise you that because I was caught in one—a little kid doesn’t understand.
I’d say you’ve got good advice, so go with it. ”
“Well, I’ll think about what you and Sierra are telling me, but I think I came to the wrong person. You’re warped.”
“Yes, because of my father’s lousy marriages. Need I say more? That proves my point.”
“All right, I’ll think about it. I don’t have a choice.
She seems to have her mind made up,” he said, looking at Cade and thinking about how cynical and hard he could be about some things in life.
Usually he was easygoing, friendly and upbeat, but he had another side, too.
Was it because of their dad? Was Sierra right that they could never make a marriage work?
Cade stared intently at him.
“What?” Blake asked. “Did you say something to me? Sorry, my mind wandered.”
“Watch out when you cross the street. If you’re that lost in thought about her, you’ll get run over.”
“I’m not going to get run over, and I’m not lost in thought about Sierra.”
“You were a minute ago. You haven’t fallen in love with her, have you?”
“No, I’m not in love, but that wouldn’t be the end of the world.”
“No, but if you’ve fallen in love, then you won’t be able to cope very well with her rejection. Otherwise, live your life, love your child and don’t look back. A lot of guys would trade with you in a flash.”
“You’re just Mr. Wisdom. I may go to a gypsy fortune-teller for advice next time.”
Cade grinned. “I’m more interesting, and I know you better. You didn’t even hear what I asked you, so maybe you’re in love and you don’t know it.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. I’d know it.”
“You’ve got the symptoms. You’re lost in a fog. You didn’t eat your lunch. You’re thinking constantly about her. If you’re in love, then that’s a whole different disease with different symptoms and a different cure.”
“Sometimes I wonder why I talk to you. Under the same circumstances, wouldn’t you think constantly about the woman you got pregnant?”
“Sure. Seriously, Blake, reconsider pushing that proposal. You’ll get time with your child, and you will be a lot happier.”
“You can’t rescind a proposal,” Blake remarked dryly. “I need to get back to work.”
“Okay, bro. Take it easy and come see me. I’ll drop by soon to see the new wing. Congratulations on the baby. That’s exciting news. Nate’s little girl is a doll. I’m scared to pick her up, but she’s a cutie. With your baby, I’m going to be a half uncle—how’s that?”
“You’ll be a full uncle. Wait until I ask you to come help.”
“Call someone else. That’s not my field.”
“No kidding,” Blake remarked, shaking his head as they walked out together and parted outside. “The party may not happen until after I’m a dad,” he called over his shoulder.
He left Cade and drove back to his office on the fourth floor of a building he owned, away from downtown Dallas.
He needed to give some thought to several things. One was his true feelings for Sierra. He wasn’t in love. Were Sierra and Cade right—that the baby would be better off if he and Sierra didn’t marry? If that was true, then he should back off and drop his proposal.
After considering it for the next hour, he still thought marriage was the best solution. They could make it work without love. Why wouldn’t Sierra give it a chance? He didn’t want to examine why the idea of coming home to her as his wife appealed to him.
For the rest of the day, he thought about the baby, Sierra, Cade and the future—and he continued to debate with himself about his marriage proposal.
Tomorrow, they would all look at his new wing, and if everything was satisfactory, Sierra, Lucinda and Eli would be done.
As far as his relationship with Sierra went, when she left it wouldn’t be goodbye.
Even if they didn’t marry, they would see each other and their lives would be intertwined for years to come.
It was difficult to see how it would be better without marriage, yet both Sierra and Cade thought so.
Anger persisted when he thought how stubborn she was over this issue. She told him to take his time and think about it, but she didn’t seem open to thinking about it herself.