Chapter 6
SIX
When Kay drove into her driveway, she was surprised to see that everything looked basically like she left it, except for Gibson's truck in the driveway. Seeing his name painted in big building block letters on the side of his truck made her heart clench.
"Kay?"
She got out of her car and looked over the hood at the voice she'd heard.
She saw Gibson first. He was too tall and too big for her to miss him standing there, even though he was a good twenty-five feet away.
Kay lifted up her hand to wave at him and Mister Langston standing on his porch.
She locked her car and headed along the sidewalk toward the gate at the front of his property. "I know I need to thank you," she began, but her neighbor dragged the back of his hand across his eyes.
"I'm so sorry, Kay." Mister Langston's cheeks had tears streaming down. "I should have seen... whoever-"
"You have nothing to apologize for." Kay wrapped her arms around the older man and gave him a hug that was meant to be a reassuring gesture, but she wasn't sure that he'd feel it, he was so tense. "I'm so grateful that you called the police."
He was already pulling away from her. "Can I come over and help clean up?"
"I got it." Gibson set his hand on Mister Langston's shoulder gently. "Don't worry. It's all taken care of."
Kay saw the shadow that seemed to cross over his face. "It's all okay," she tried to reassure him. "I'm sure they're going to catch whoever did it. The detective had some ideas when I talked to him. He praised you, too."
She could tell that Mister Langston wasn't buying it even though it was the truth.
"Well," he sighed, "now that you're home and young Braun here has boarded things up, I'm heading inside to watch some TV."
"Thanks again," she leaned in and brushed a kiss on her neighbor's cheek. She felt him tense when she did it, but before she could apologize for it, his lips curved into the hint of a smile, "I mean it."
Mister Langston reached out and squeezed her hand. "You're so sweet to say that. I’ll see you tomorrow." He turned away and stepped inside.
Once he was inside and she heard the lock on his front door click into place, she felt her whole-body tense up.
"How did you... How did you know?"
She looked up and saw Gibson brush his fingers through his hair.
"It's one of the things I do as a contractor. The police have my name and number in the rotation for service providers at..."
He stopped talking and his lips closed.
"Crime scenes." She said the words and let out another breath. "You mean that you get calls to crime scenes."
Gibson nodded. "We work with the police enough to know what to do and what to leave alone."
He gestured toward the walkway, and she walked ahead of him to the sidewalk.
Once there, Gibson closed the gate behind them. "I boarded up your windows from the outside. I didn't go inside so I wouldn't disturb anything in there."
She nodded. "The detective, I think his name is Rafferty?"
Gibson nodded.
"He wants me to walk through and let him know what's missing. And if there's damage, too."
"You... you want me to go inside with you?"
"Yes." She didn't have to consider that answer. She knew she wanted him at her side while she saw the damage.
"Okay, let's go."
He reached toward her, and she tensed up, her neck and shoulders tightening.
It had been an instinct of hers, not a gesture that she'd meant to do, but she saw the effect it had on Gibson.
He was upset and she didn't blame him.
"Gibson, I'm... I'm sorry."
He shook his head. "You don't have to apologize. You've had a bad shock."
They looked at each other and continued to walk, side by side until they wound their way between her SUV and his construction truck.
When they stopped just shy of the steps to her kitchen she looked down to the ground at her feet.
"I just don't know what to think," she shook her head feeling how heavy every limb of hers was.
Her head felt like it had doubled in weight.
"I don't know why anyone would think there's something worth stealing in my house. "
"Sometimes it's not about the worth of something, it's just a matter of people wanting to take happiness from someone else. It's hard to say that there are people out there like that."
"But there are," she agreed. "I just... it's never visited me at home before.
We've even had thieves come into the hospital and steal all kinds of crazy things, but my house.
" She drew in a deep breath and let it out.
"I feel like I just want to dowse the whole house in bleach and pretend none of this ever happened. "
She could feel his gaze on her and it was painful. Physically painful to see the sympathy in his eyes.
"Gibson, I know I asked you to stay here and walk through the house with me, but..." She curled her bottom lip in between her teeth and bit down sharply, hoping the pain would focus her and keep her head on straight. "I think I need to be alone."
She saw the way her words hit him, but as much as she wanted to take it back, the last thing she wanted to do was fall apart in front of Gibson Braun. The man walked through fire on a daily basis. He was a hero!
If she fell to pieces over some broken glass and... whatever else she would find inside, she didn't want to have him witness her tears.
"If you want," she heard how stilted his words were and the start of a tremor in his voice, "I can wait outside while you go through. Just in case you need... something."
She heard the unspoken sentiment in the depths of his tone. In case you need someone.
Kay knew she wanted him there.
She fought off the idea that she needed him, because that too was weak.
She'd left home years before determined to make a life for herself. A life where she relied on herself.
Not other people.
Not a man.
Then why did it feel so horrible inside instead of freeing?
Why did she want to throw her arms around him and hold on instead of pushing him out the door?
Was this because she was scared?
Or because Gibson made it so easy for her to let down her walls?
She didn't know.
And she wasn't sure she wanted to know.
"Gibson-" She saw the way he listened to her.
Saw the way his eyes widened just a hint.
Saw the way his hands rubbed along his thighs as if he was trying to stop from reaching out to her.
That had to be wishful thinking on her part.
It had to.
"I can handle this on my own. I would... I would really like some privacy. I'm sorry. I know we haven't really talked much lately, but this-"
"It's not the time. I know, Kay. I know."
She squeezed her eyes shut. "I... I know I owe you a better explanation than this. I just don't know what to say right now. I thought I could handle this better alone."
"You don't have to be alone, Kay."
Oh... Those words were beautiful.
They were a dream.
A dream that couldn't be hers if she wanted to head the Trauma Department. It wouldn't be fair to anyone that she might date or spend time with. She was going to have to make a decision about her future and staying away from Gibson would just make the decision easier.
"I'm going to go," he took a step to the side and gestured at his truck in a vague sweep of his hand. "I've got a friend's wedding I'm going to this weekend. And then I'll be back to my normal schedule. I'd like to see you when I get back. We should probably talk."
"We probably shouldn't."
The words tasted like ash on her tongue. Soot. Something chalky and unpleasant.
"I have a conference I'm going to this weekend, too. And I'm not sure we'll need to talk to each other after this. I'll make sure I pay you for your time today, with my windows. I'm... I'm glad it was you that came to do it. I know I can trust you. I just- I'm not sure-"
"Then if you're not sure, Kay. Let's just leave it here. Who knows? Maybe after this weekend, things will look different, but I know something that won't change."
She fought back the tears that were threatening to gather on her lashes. She tried to shake her head or turn away, but she just couldn't.
"I want to see you, Kay. I want to take you out or spend time with you here at your house.
I know I want to help you get your house finished so that you have a place to relax after everything you do to help other people.
I want to do that for you even if you don't want to let this go anywhere romantic.
I just... I want to be around you. Please, just think about that. Okay?"
She'd never had anyone say anything like that to her.
Ever.
"Kay?"
She swallowed and felt her heart squeeze tight inside her chest.
Tell him no, she told herself. Begging. Tell him no.
But when she opened her mouth, she said the craziest thing.
"I'll think about it."
And then he left.
She spent the rest of the night regretting sending him away.
She really did need to get away from Center City so she could clear her head because just being around Gibson made her heart scream louder than her head and that was a dangerous thing. Her brain had always been smarter than her heart.