Chapter 15
It was quite the weekend.
I breathe out, wincing slightly from the soreness as I push the two-way door of the lecture hall open and step in.
I feel a lot better today. But the ache is there, lingering.
Fabio didn’t leave my room, even though I could feel the burn of hisannoyance from where he had beensitting all night, pretending to read a book.
When I left to clean up in my bathroom,I was torn between being overjoyed that he was my first and feeling frustrated that he hadn’t changed his stance.
Upon returning,wearing only my silk mauve nightwear,Idiscovered a freshpair of lemon-green sheets on my bed. When I thanked him, all he could muster was a grunt.
I climbed on the bed to find a cup of tea on my nightstand. He told me it was a soothing tea for the pain, and he had gotten it from Vittoria’s collection.
His affection and care were there. He didn’t leave me to myself. He was there every time I turned, and my eyes opened. My alarm went off, and when I woke up, he was on the chaise lounge wearing a freshcotton white designer dress shirt and navy blue dress pants. I’m not evensure when he cleaned up and changed.
When I went in to freshen up, a trolley of healthy breakfast was waiting for me. I couldn’t not eat with the wayhe was staring at me. Even though I don’t like breakfast, I decide to have it for him. Maybe it was his way of telling me some of the things he was unable to say out loud.
He cares for me.
I can’t dare argue against that truth.
He would kill for me; it’s not up for debate, even if the gun needs to be pointed at himself. He is already going against my father’s wish because he thinks it will make me happy. It’s a first for Fabio. He owes my father his loyalty. I don’t know the full story, but I have seen him show it more than once.
On Sunday, when I had started editing the pictures for the street photography project and lifted my eyes to look through the door of my studio, he was outside in the car, sitting in the driver’s seat with the door open. He stayed until dusk, until he was sure I had dinner.
Today is Monday, and his brooding is still there.
White silk shirt and maroon dress pants. I tried initiating a conversation when I got into the car, but the firm shake of his head folded my tongue in my mouth.
The drive down to my department was in complete silence. He didn’t utter a word even when he stopped for my cups of coffee and picked up burgers in case I got hungry since my lecture was chained and I had a few practicals.
I deflate as I dart my eyes around the almost empty lecture hall because whenever Fabio is mad at me, he drives like it’s a car race.
Great. Now I have ample amount of time to think about last weekend.
I drag my sore body to a seat and sit gently.
I drop my bag on the desk in front of me, careful not to ruin my camera and my mood by thinking about Paul and what he did. Not knowing what to do and needing some distraction, I open the pack of fast food and begin to eat my burger.
“The best day of the week is upon us!” Gloria shrieks in my ear, and I jump from my seat, cursing under my breath as I hit a sore spot.
“Gloria, seriously!” I scowl at her.
“Someone had a crazy weekend,” she huffs dramatically. “Guess who got ten thousand followers on Instagram?”
I point at her in a boring way, then push the second burger to her. “It’s beef.”
“Why? They ran out of grass?” She collects it and tears the paper bag open.
“I am not a vegetarian, I just like my burgers with…”
“Grass, noted,” she takes a bite. “But then, why are you having a beef burger on a Monday morning?”
“Fabio got them for us,” I shrug. “A little way to punish me for what I did to him this weekend.”
“Ah ha!” Gloria slams the desk in front of me.
“It’s not what you think or how you are thinking it,” I sip from my cup of coffee.
I am too tired to speak, but I know I have to let it out somehow. I couldn’t go to Vittoria with this secret, for fear she might do something. She”s not exactly known for having the best temper, and thepregnancy only makes it worse. She would take it out on Fabio, and I can’t risk my father finding out.
I am not a child, but my father finding out I lost my virginity to his best friend in our house, a best friend who is still contemplating whether to marry me… isn’t the kind of news I want flying around.
“Tell me then,” Gloria chews loudly, her hair bouncing as she swings her head from side to side. Sauce drips from the burger onto on her cream dress with lemon grass prints.
I am about to say something but I see Paul strutting to a seat a little away from us from the corner of my eye, sunglasses on to conceal the black eyes he got from Fabio. There are still some slits on his lips and part of his cheek.
He is wearing a light blue sweater and black jeans, his camera and notepad clattering on his desk as he tosses them. His jaw clenches the longer I openly stare at him. I don’t know if I hate or pity him. But I do know I want to keep my distance.
“Hey, Paul,” Gloria waves at him. He waves back but says nothing. “Cranky this Monday morning,” she snorts.
“He tried to force himself on me,” I whisper, and her eyes fly open.
“Fabio did what?” She drops her head.
“Not Fabio, Paul,” I point with my eyes, and she blinks unbelievably. “It was Fabio who got in the way and gave him the beating of his life,” I slurp my coffee.
Gloria looks at Paul for a quick second and snorts. “He deserved it. No means no,” she bites from her burger. “How disappointing, and there I thought he was the dream guy.”
“Your dream guy, narrow it down,” I tap on the desk with my forefinger, but she only nods, “Something happened after that, between Fabio and me,” I look over my shoulder, ensuring we are away from earshot.
She comes a little too low, almost kissing the desk, and I roll my eyes at her.
“Gloria, sit up.” I snap my fingers on her face, and she pouts.
“Fine. I thought it was a top-secret level.” She sits straight but crouches in a way that brings her face closer to me.
“It is, but you are drawing attention and being overly dramatic with it,” I slurp, then put down my cup of coffee to rest my elbows on the desk. “I had sex with Fabio last weekend,” I spill, and she shrieks in excitement.
“You did not!” She drops her burger on the paper bag and claps her hands together.
“I did,” I smile now, some of the tension wearing off, thanks to her lightheartedness over it.
“How was it?” She leans forward. “Was he good? I hope he wasn’t a jerk about it since it was your first time.”
“No, not at all. He was affectionate, and I had an orgasm,” I whisper that part, my face burning up as heat stirs in my stomach.
“Your first time, and you had an orgasm?” She opens her mouth, and her eyes stretch so wide that I fear they might pop out.
I slap a hand in the air to wave her off. I want to pretend it wasn’t a big deal, but she told me about her first, and it was all the encouragement I needed to abstain from sex. She had told me how hard it is for her to find someone she connects with on that level.
But here I am, my first time with the man of my dreams, and I had an orgasm.
Now I know how people who hit the jackpot feel.
“But…” I say, chewing the inside of my lip. “He has a son, his name is Jake and the boy is six years old.”
“Fabio has six-year-old son?” Gloria’s voice shoots up, drawing some attention to us.
I gesture for her to shush it and bring my head low, “It’s not a problem for me. I am happy because it means I wouldn’t need to drop out of school and get pregnant immediately if we get married, like my father would want,” I pick up my cup of coffee, “And the boy is adorable. His mother is a sweet soul, too.”
Gloria leans back, like it’s too much information and she is trying to get the right one to stick.
“Then why is there a but?” She says as the lecturer, Dr. Janel, struts to the platform, ballcap covering her whiskey blonde hair, black framed thick frames, baby blue shirt, and baggy jeans.
“There’s a but because he thinks I deserve a clean slate,” I reach for my bag, and Gloria makes a bemused facial expression before spinning to face the platform.
Thank God I am not the only one who thinks Fabio was spitting jargon.
I put on my glasses and turn my attention to Dr. Janel, all the while feeling Paul two seats beside me.
“Can I talk to you after the lecture? Eva?”
I am shocked to see that he is talking to me, but I nod, wishing I could get out of this hall before he can approach me. I probably should follow up with Dr. Janel as soon as she leaves the class, pretending to have specific questions that I couldn’t ask in class. Only I risk getting a personal assignment.
Forty-five minutes later, Dr. Janel is done with the lecture, and as I pack up to rush towards her, I turn my head to see that Paul is gone.
“Guilt can eat the soul,” Gloria spins to face me. “He probably thought about it and couldn’t face you,” she swings her eyes to the seat Paul was occupying. She puffs. “You were saying?” She taps on the desk, her smile coming back and her eyes lighting up. “The son and the baby mama.”
“I did not say baby mama,” I chide.
“Call a spade a spade,” she shrugs, and I laugh softly.