3. Mébh
I came to,suddenly feeling cold, but I was the one in control of my psyche, not my Wolf. Right away, I realized the warmth that had been surrounding me was gone and that’s what had woken me. The scent of a wood fire was weakening, and my Wolf did not care for that, not one bit. She growled angrily.
I cracked open my eyes and my head gave a throb, forcing me to slam my eyes shut again. Instead, I blindly reached out, seeking the heat. My hand connected with a wall of warmth, and I scrambled toward it.
The sound of a long-suffering sigh met my ears, and then I was encompassed in the warmth and safety, making my Wolf purr happily again.
Slowly, memories were trickling back to me. When the alarm had blared and the lights went out at Polaris, all I could focus on was the fact that my mate had left. My Wolf stole control completely from my grasp, and I was forced into a back seat in my own mind and body as my rage spiraled out of control. I didn’t remember any of what Molly had told me to do in case of an emergency like this—I hadn’t been paying attention to her stupid list of rules. Not that I could have done what she had instructed anyway, with my Wolf dominating.
In the chaos, Molly ran straight to Nikos. Then she turned back, reaching out to me and looking desperate. But they dissolved into shadow and shadow walked away—a skill that was unique to the Polaris vampires alone and inherited from their Maker.
My Wolf turned us around and we found an armored demon brandishing a sword, like a knight in shining armor, only ugly as shit with a huge nose and foul breath. My scream rent the air, my Wolf and I sharing in our shock. She immediately went on the defensive, snarling in warning and backing up. She did not fucking shift as she should have, as I had been trained to do. I was basically a sitting duck. A liability. The ugly demon had only to hit me, and my Wolf and I were thrust into blackness.
My head hurting made sense then—likely a concussion—and so did the cut on my forehead where I’d been hit. My accelerated healing was kicking in—a benefit of being an immortal werewolf, even one that hadn’t stopped aging yet. What didn’t make sense to me was where I was exactly because I was not at Polaris headquarters anymore, that much I could tell by scent alone. The metallic scent of vampire was completely absent, and in its place a pleasant bonfire-like scent surrounded me.
I slowly opened my eyes this time, noting my head was already feeling slightly better, and saw a thick, muscle-packed chest without a single hair. Looking up, I couldn’t help my jaw dropping open in surprise when I discovered Gray, the very handsome demon male—the male my Wolf stirred excitedly for and insisted was her other half—covered in drying blood and staring down at me with worry creasing his heavy brow. I was cradled safely in his strong arms.
He rescued me?
But I thought he left?
I didn’t know if I should be thanking him for the rescue or angry at him for having left originally.
Gray studied me, his stormy eyes penetrating. Unlike any other male I’d met before, it felt like he could see into my being and see every secret. But I wasn’t scared. There was a sense of safety and understanding there.
“Are you alright? That was a big hit you took.” His deep, raspy voice rumbled over me, settling right between my thighs. I barely kept myself from squeezing them together.
I wasn’t worried about my injuries; I’d had plenty worse happen back in pack training. The amount of bones I had broken over the years was comical, but that was just part of it. Learning to fight was imperative in the werewolf world, especially with the pack’s reality before Gabriel. Blood never bothered me, but my rage was always my kryptonite. It was infuriating when my Wolf would just take me over. It was something my instructors in pack training had constantly warned me about, and a reason I knew I would never be in control enough to make it as a pack warrior. I was a liability. At least getting knocked out had cooled my rage and returned control to me in this instance, but I was damned lucky to be alive right now. Who knew what would have happened if Gray hadn’t spirited me away?
He had me pressed against his chest but stood at the side of a massive bed where he had clearly been trying to deposit me. We were in a large bedroom decorated in cool masculine tones. There was a wall of windows that showed a picturesque nighttime cityscape below, and the ceiling was higher than normal.
“I’ll heal,” I croaked, rubbing my sore head. “What happened? How did I end up here?”
A shadow crossed his face briefly before he masked it. “Nicodemus’s demonic army attacked. I saw you go down. I killed the fucker who hurt you and brought you here.”
“Where is here exactly?”
“My apartment,” he rumbled with a scowl. I felt those two words reverberate deep inside his massive chest I was pressed up against. Once again, I struggled to keep from squeezing my thighs together. I swear his words went straight to my clit.
I was shocked he had taken me somewhere so personal. That meant this space and the oversized bed were his. My Wolf stirred excitedly as my mind ran wild with fantasies of Gray fucking me every which way. I really did have to squeeze my thighs together as my core clenched with desperate need.
Gray inhaled, his nostrils flaring. Could he smell my arousal? His eyes grew heavy lidded, but then he shook himself and was back to scowling at me.
That would be a yes.
I launched into more questions in an effort to distract both of us. “Where is your apartment located exactly? Like what city?” I was less worried and more curious now than anything. I’d wanted to get away from the pack and this was my chance.
“Portland, Oregon.”
“Portland?” I echoed, nearly vibrating with excitement.
I’d always wanted to visit the city that featured the tag line: Keep Portland Weird. It was traditionally a melting pot of supernatural factions, but as of late, a vampire clan had been trying to take over. The Silverton Clan had gotten into the human and blood-slave market. That’s where Faelen and Chef Henry’s third mate, Ember, and Melody, Ember’s Faerie friend, had been enslaved together. Gabriel had shut the operation down, or rather his agency did, before the Supernatural Council was forced to get involved, which would have been a deadly situation for all. But the Silvertons were still controlling the city for the time being as long as they obeyed the rules and didn’t draw too much human attention.
Portland was, unfortunately, miles from the main pack settlement in Eastern Washington and even further from Polaris headquarters in southern Oregon. Mind linking was out of the question now; I was too far away. I was truly on my own—something I had craved, but now wasn’t so sure about.
Glancing down at my chest, I realized I still wore only the flimsy sunflower sundress that had spaghetti straps, and its length barely covered my ass when I wasn’t being cradled. I was also very aware that the excuse for a dress only had triangles of thin fabric covering my breasts that did nothing to hide my erect nipples, which the demon was having a difficult time not staring at. There was no suitcase to run to for a change of clothes. There was no spare clothing if I lost control and shifted—not that nudity bothered me as a werewolf, but it wasn’t polite by human standards.
I racked my brain, thinking hard. If I couldn’t mind link to anyone for help, at least I could call— Wait... where was my cell phone?
A whole new panic began setting in, and unfortunately, so did the rage.
“Did you take my cell phone?” I accused Gray as I felt around my body desperately in search of the device. I’d had the phone in hand when that ugly demon hit me. It was clearly gone now.
Shit, shit, shit.
My Wolf howled dangerously within my mind, and I cared not. My blood pounded in my ears. I felt itchy in my own skin and uncomfortable.
“What?” Gray asked, looking at me with a bewildered expression.
“Why did you take it?” I demanded, pushing against his chest until he set me on my feet.
“I didn’t take it,” he spluttered as he stepped back, clearly sensing my impending meltdown.
“YES, YOU DID!” I yelled, pointing my finger at him accusingly. “I had it back at Polaris and now I don’t. You had to have taken it!” I turned on my heel and started frantically looking, throwing the comforter and pillows every which way, as the rage spiraled out of my control.
Without my cell phone, there was no calling Molly for help or advice—there was no calling any pack member for that matter.
There was no checking my texts.
There was no access to my socials.
On top of all of that, Molly would kill me if I’d broken another cell. Though money wasn’t an issue like when Luke ran the pack—she had earned a wage as the chef under Gabriel and Nikos was not hurting for cash—she would still yell at me. I gasped for breath as I started hyperventilating. My fangs and claws began to grow in as my Wolf surged to the surface.
Gray stood there, looking flabbergasted. His eyes flashed silver. He cocked his head, looking even more confused as he stared at me.
I rounded on him again, pillow in hand. “Are you trying to control me?” I screamed.
“No,” Gray said while raising his hands, palms up.
“You’re lying! You kidnapped me and took my phone!” I threw the pillow at his head. It awkwardly bounced off his horn before it could hit his face. This only infuriated me more.
I scrambled for another pillow to throw, but Gray crowded my space.
“Stop it, you big behemoth!”
He ignored me and grabbed my wrists. This only served to make me feel more trapped and furious.
“Take a deep breath,” he said slowly, his husky rasp steady.
I fought back with all my might, trying to wrestle my wrists free of his massive paws. I knew what he was doing, and every previous instructor had tried to calm me the same way. “Don’t try that shit on me! Everyone always tells me to fucking breathe! I don’t want to! You’re just like the rest of them!”
Gray shockingly stopped fighting me and released my wrists straight away. He knelt, but still towered over me. For some reason, his looming presence had a neutralizing effect and my rage spiral paused.
He reached up and gently brushed my cheek as he searched my face with a worried expression. Now that I wasn’t freaking out as hard, I felt the tingle where our skin connected. Calm confidence coursed through his touch, and I latched on to it, wanting more of that instead of staying in the rage-filled state like usual.
“Can you inhale for me?”
I nodded and took a deep breath.
“Good. Now slowly exhale for me.”
I followed his instructions, clinging to his measured words like a life raft as I struggled.
“Now repeat, deep inhale.” He paused for a few seconds as I inhaled. “Slowly exhale.”
The more my heart rate slowed, the more I could think logically. My rage fizzled out and my Wolf finally stopped fighting me for control.
“You are safe, Mébh,” he said reassuringly, seeming to know the exact words I needed to hear. “The phone is replaceable, but you are not. Now keep it going. Inhale.”
I kept at it, doing the box-breathing technique. Inhale for four counts. Hold for four counts. Exhale for four counts. Hold for four counts. Repeat.
As I looked into his stormy-gray eyes, my Wolf was now calm. The fangs and claws were shrinking away. Only Molly had ever been able to help me calm my Wolf like this. Usually it would have progressed to me shifting and tearing things up until the Wolf tired. My pack training instructors had often gone and fetched Molly from her work in the main kitchen to calm my Wolf and help me regain control.
I was also now realizing that no cell meant no Molly calling me frantically. I was in Portland, a city I had only dreamed of visiting, and I was in my fated mate’s apartment—in his bed. Molly would never have permitted something like this to happen and now she couldn’t contact me to end it. This was my opportunity to get to know Gray, the demon who was mine, and hopefully see more of the supernatural and human world alike.
“You are right, the phone is replaceable.” I sighed in agreement with him. “Sorry about freaking out.” I was slightly embarrassed now about my crazy, rage-filled reaction. Gray didn’t deserve that, but he was seeing the real me, raw and still trying to learn to control my rage.
“It’s alright.” Gray had a look of understanding on his face, his eyes soft as he regarded me.
“As long as you are feeling better, I can’t bring you back to Polaris—it’s not safe—but I can take you back to your pack,” he said.
My world ground to a halt with his admission.
He’s taking me back?
Just like that?
My Wolf yowled with displeasure. A knot formed in my stomach. I didn’t want to go back—not now, after discovering I was alone with my mate in Portland. This was a harsh reminder that before the demons attacked, he had made eye contact with me and he had tried to leave without so much as a “Hi, nice to meet you, fated mate.”
I struggled to rein in the brimming rage and took a more sensual approach in the hopes of changing his mind. “What if I don’t want to go back?” I asked in a sultry voice and reached up to stroke his strong, shaved jawline. Gray dodged my hand, refusing to allow me to touch him. My Wolf howled sorrowfully within.
“I am returning you,” he stated as if I hadn’t spoken and shot to his feet.
The loss of his touch was like a knife to the chest. The cold physically hurt, or maybe it was the forced distance he put between us. It felt like an impossible canyon now, a rift between us that could not be healed.
Where did the demon who just calmed me go?
Was this because I’d freaked out on him?
Was I not good enough to be his mate?
Unfortunately, if the reason was my freak out, there was another one brewing.
I scrambled to my feet and met Gray’s steely gaze. My eyes tingled, informing me my Wolf was showing once again. “But we are fated, right?”
Gray made no outward sign that this was news or even information he particularly cared about. He just shrugged with a deadpan expression on his sharp face. “Yeah, so?”
My mouth popped open in shock and my Wolf growled angrily. “Does being fated mates mean nothing to you?” I growled. Utter nonsense! Everyone wants a mate, right?
He shrugged noncommittally again, his face a mask of impassivity.
This only served to piss my Wolf and me off more, and my rage spiraled out of control.
“Which pack do you belong to?” Gray asked.
“I’m not fucking telling you!” I snapped. My Wolf surged again, and a furious snarl ripped from my throat.
He raised an eyebrow as he silently regarded me.
“You can’t take me back!”
He approached again, looming over me, and placed a hand on my shoulder. It was so large it covered my neck too. The feelings of calm began washing over me once more, but I fought hard trying to stay in the rage state.
“Fuck you!” I screeched.
“Please inhale slowly.” Gray’s words were laced with power, like an Alpha command, one I couldn’t ignore. He wasn’t an Alpha wolf, but he was somehow able to command me like one. Matehood was a powerful thing.
I took a deep breath against my will, then slowly let it out.
The rage began to slip away.
My Wolf stopped fighting me so hard.
“Good. Now keep going.” He praised me and lightly stroked the back of my neck. My Wolf began purring and wanted to present her belly submissively for him.
I kept going. Inhale. Exhale.
Calm again, no thanks to Gray’s intervention, I resigned myself to my fate. If he wanted to take me back, he would, so I answered the question that had set me off. “I belong to Gabriel MacTirelock’s pack.”
“The same pack as Jenny,” he mused, while rubbing his chin thoughtfully.
“Why return me to the pack and not back to Polaris? Why isn’t it safe?” I asked with a bite of sarcasm.
“Nicodemus will still be watching Polaris. He apparently has been since I dropped Cassius and Jenny off there months ago.”
“Wait, who is Nicodemus?” I raised a brow at him in confusion.
“He is the commander of the demonic army that attacked Polaris in search of me,” he explained.
“So they attacked because they were after you?” I stared at him, wide-eyed.
He looked away and wouldn’t meet my eyes anymore. “Yes,” he mumbled, barely audibly.
“Why?”
He inhaled sharply and growled, seemingly at the memories. “I killed their corrupted demoness leader. Well, Cassius and I did.”
My jaw dropped in shock. “So they want revenge?” I asked, trying to understand what had happened.
“Basically.”
I stared at him, sensing there was much more he wasn’t telling me, but the issue at hand was him bringing me back to the pack.
That couldn’t happen.
In the meantime, I scrambled for a believable lie, anything that would convince him to wait to return me, even if it was only for a few more hours. “You just rescued me from a fight.” I cleverly reminded him. “Unless you want another fight on your hands, you should just wait till morning to take me back to the pack.”
Gray eyed me, stormy eyes penetrating. They flashed to silver and his expression once again morphed to confusion before he shook himself out of it and glared at me suspiciously. “Why should I wait? I just have to drop you off. It shouldn’t be a big thing.”
“Your funeral then,” I said offhandedly.
He glanced at the ceiling in exasperation. “Why would it be my funeral?” His tone was heavy with skepticism.
“Madelyn, the pack’s resident witch, has all pack land magically protected.” It wasn’t really a lie—she did have all pack land under her protection all the time, not just at night, as I was insinuating. With her seer vision, she was made aware of any being who crossed a border, and from there she called Gabriel if it warranted his attention. “Plus, the pack warriors run border patrols.” Also not a lie. They did run patrols constantly but there were plenty of holes, and other creatures had been known to slip through from time to time. “It won’t be as simple as dropping me off. You won’t get away without a fight,” I declared.
He narrowed his eyes at me as if he detected my fibbing.
“Just wait until the sun rises, then you will be able to drop me off without issues.” Or choose not to drop me off at all.
I could see the fight going on in his mind as he struggled to decide if going now and risking blood being spilled was worth it or not.
He inhaled sharply, finally having reached a decision. “I will be returning you in the morning then.” He stated the fact that he was taking me back so nonchalantly, as if returning me like some outfit that didn’t fit, instead of him completely denying what fate had decreed. At least I had bought some more time with him.
If Gray was trying to convince me he wasn’t interested, it would never work. His uncaring nature only spurred me on and made it more of a challenge to convince him we belonged together. Fate was on my side in this. We were fated. It was inevitable. I had tonight to convince him to change his mind about spurning our matehood, and it started with getting to know him better.
“Can you show me around your apartment then?” I asked sweetly, glancing toward the open door. It would be good to at least get my bearings.
Gray thought for a moment before answering. “Yes, I suppose I can.” He gestured to the door. “After you.”
I stalked to the doorway, thankful my head no longer hurt, and walked through, feeling his eyes on my ass. He ducked through after me a moment later. Human dwellings were just not built for demonic inhabitants. Luckily, the ceiling was at least higher to accommodate his immense height and horns.
He followed in my wake and pointed out the different rooms and their functions. “This is a guest room.” He pointed to a closed door to the left. “Restroom.” He pointed at another door to the right as we passed it.
We rounded a corner, and I found myself in a huge, open-plan area featuring a living room and kitchen. The living room space had several comfortable-looking oversized couches and a big-screen TV mounted on a wall. The kitchen was an open space with an island in dark wood, just like the master bedroom. There were several doors, and I assumed they were pantries or more storage.
I glanced over the entire area, seeking anything remotely personal. No pictures were on the walls, no magnets on the fridge, just barebones couch, TV, appliances. Gray had so little personality showing in his own apartment. Secretive much? Or maybe this is a new apartment, and he hasn’t decorated yet?
“That’s mostly it,” he shrugged, coming to a stop and facing me.
“How long have you lived here?” I asked, hoping to glean some insight into him as I took a seat on the couch closest to us.
“I don’t remember,” he replied in a guarded tone while he remained standing.
Well then. Maybe it had been such a long time since he moved in, he didn’t remember the year exactly. Being immortal and alive for centuries, the years started blending together, or so I had been told. Plus, maybe he wasn’t into decorating.
I took another questioning route instead. “How old are you?”
“I don’t remember,” he replied a second time. “How old are you?”
I glanced in his direction, sending him a glare, thinking he was just being an ass now, yet I refused to be deterred. I kept at it but answered his question first. “Eighteen.”
He scrubbed a hand down his face, looking mildly shocked. “Hells bells, I didn’t think you were that young.”
I didn’t think my age was an issue. I was legal, wasn’t I?
I pressed on, searching out more information. “What do you like doing for fun?”
He smirked. “Usually it’s finding a new pussy to fuck.”
I growled, my Wolf backing me, before I could stop myself.
“Yeah, I didn’t think you would like hearing that.” His smirk deepened into a grin, and I kinda wanted to punch him.
“What else do you do for fun, like hobbies?” I asked through gritted teeth, trying to steer the conversation away from him having sex with other beings as jealousy streaked through me. My Wolf wanted to file more complaints, but I also knew I’d had partners before this too. I couldn’t really criticize him as long as that shit was done now.
“I don’t remember,” he replied with a shrug.
I was getting tired of hearing “I don’t know.” Was he bullshitting me? I doubted it—he boldly announced he loved sex. But was there more to his vagueness?
“You don’t seem to remember a lot.” I narrowed my eyes at him.
“I don’t,” he snapped.
“Why?” I asked, aghast.
Gray growled in frustration and darted into the kitchen in answer. I simply went in after him.
He opened the fridge and pulled out a bag that read “Mandarin Palace.” He turned, with his back to the wall, but was forced to stop short after closing the fridge to find me standing right there, toe to toe with him. I had to crane my head back to meet his eyes, and his black horns gleamed in the unnatural kitchen lighting. I wanted to run my hands and possibly my tongue over them just to feel their texture and see his reactions. Were they rough or were they smooth? Gods, this demon was so mysterious, and I wanted to learn everything about him. Especially what made him lose his mind in bed. I wouldn’t call myself sexually experienced by any means, though I had plenty of oral experience. My Wolf was never a big fan of those previous sexual encounters and that’s why I’d never gone all the way with anyone before. Dating wasn’t really something our pack members did. Before Gabriel, arranged marriages were the norm, so the hook-up scene was basically it. A means to an end. But this was my fated mate. Everything was much more meaningful, especially if our attraction to one another was any indication.
“Why don’t you remember?” I asked him point-blank and refused to budge from my spot blocking his path.
The demon glared at me for a moment before he let out an exasperated sigh and reluctantly answered. “Because most of my memories were stolen from me.”
My brows lifted in shock. “What? How?” This was what he had been hiding.
“If I could tell you that, I wouldn’t be in this predicament, now would I,” he quipped and then looked up and sidestepped me, still keeping his front to me as he set the bag on the counter. He started pulling Chinese take-out containers from the bag. Chinese food was not something the pack ever had, but I recognized the iconic style of containers from the internet.
My nose wrinkled.
As a werewolf, rare—or close to—meat was my preferred food choice. “You’ve got to be kidding me. Can’t I make us something more fresh?”
I pivoted and opened the fridge, looking for something, anything, to cook. Molly had taught me how to make the most out of what ingredients you had, and I had a fairly good list of memorized recipes, thanks to helping her in the kitchen so much. However, I found nothing in the fridge but a box of baking soda, and the freezer was just as barren.
“Feel free to check the pantry”—Gray pointed to one of the two doors—“but I can assure you there is nothing but a box of cornflakes. That’s what you can look forward to for breakfast.” He grabbed two plates from another cabinet and began dishing up food from the take-out containers.
Surprisingly, the food didn’t smell half bad.
The pantry was just as Gray had said: bare save for a box of cereal. The other door had to be a broom closet or something then. I didn’t think much of it as I turned back to him.
“Breakfast cereal with no milk. Great,” I grumbled as I shut the door.
“I wasn’t exactly expecting company,” he mumbled, looking a bit sheepish. He covered his embarrassment by taking one of the now-full plates of Chinese food and putting it in the microwave on the counter.
“I don’t need food like you do to survive,” he explained.
“You don’t need to eat?”
“I didn’t say that. I do. But I can live for years without it. You cannot.”
That was true. Because I hadn’t stopped aging yet, I was still vulnerable in many ways, like needing food like a mortal. Werewolves ate for energy, but once fully immortal, they could go a few days without eating and survive.
He began washing his hands.
I returned us back to the missing memory issue. “So you have no memory? How have you been functioning?” I asked, completely perplexed.
He dried his hands and leaned against the counter, still keeping his front to me. If I didn’t know better, he was hiding something. “Facts are missing in my memories. I remember how to feed myself and go about daily activities.”
“Can you get the memories back?”
He swapped the plates in the microwave before turning to look at me. “I’m still trying to figure that out. Do you know how Cassius’s mate, Jenny, got her memories back after she lost them?”
I was taken a bit aback by his question. I did recall a few months back Jenny had most of her memories suppressed, and Cassius had a meeting seeking help from Gabriel and Madelyn, the witch, but that’s about as much as I knew.
I shook my head. “No. Only that it wasn’t an issue after the next full moon.”
He remained silent and looked deep in thought. It had been a few full moons since, and his memory clearly hadn’t returned when her’s had.
I cocked my head at him. “Were you attacked by the same being or something?” I asked, recalling Nikos mentioning Gray had helped Cassius rescue Jenny.
“More like demoness bitch.”
“The one you and Cassius killed?”
He glanced meaningfully at me and didn’t say anything, giving me my answer. The conversation was effectively dropped after that.
He pulled the second plate from the microwave and presented me with reheated Chinese food. I had to admit, it did smell good. I took the plate and the set of wooden chopsticks he offered me. I stared at the chopsticks, unable to work out how to use them.
Gray set his plate on the counter next to me. He expertly separated the wooden chopsticks. I felt stupid for not having realized they needed to be pulled apart. He set them in his big hand and began easily scooping up food into his mouth.
It was after I kept blatantly staring and not eating that he paused and looked from me to the still-attached chopsticks in my hand. “Do you not know how to use them?”
My cheeks heated with embarrassment. “I do!”
I quickly copied what he had done to separate the little wooden sticks and then haphazardly gripped them. I tried to pick up a hunk of what smelled like meat, but the damned thing kept slipping between them. I was getting frustrated fast and didn’t realize until after that the growl my Wolf made had escaped my lips.
Gray leaned over, his nearness completely distracting me. He plucked up the meat I had been trying to grab and held it out for me, right in front of my lips. “Bite,” he instructed in his deep, rumbling voice, though it wasn’t an Alpha command this time. His words settled low in my belly and my thighs squeezed together in answer.
I did as he instructed, grabbing the hunk with my teeth and pulling it into my mouth.
He watched with gray eyes riveted to me as I took the meat. I chewed, swallowed, and licked my lips.
Chinese takeout was good. Who knew?
His eyes followed my tongue’s journey across my lips until he shook his head abruptly as if to clear it, then he refocused on me.
“Let me teach you,” he said, gripping my hand. “Hold your thumb and pointer finger out and your middle finger like this.” He showed me, set one of the sticks in my hand and then directed me on how to hold it before adding the second. His hand was huge and swallowed my little one up, but he was so warm and gentle. He guided me through picking up a few more bites.
All too soon he was shifting away, having completed his lesson. “Does that make sense?”
“If I say ‘no,’ does it mean you will keep helping me?”
He smirked. “Show me you’ve got it.”
I expertly plucked up another piece of meat and plopped it into my mouth, demonstrating I had it down.
“Good.”
His smile and praise washed over me and made my Wolf purr.
We fell into silence as we both ate, though I couldn’t help but keep sneaking peaks in his direction. A few times, I caught him looking at me.
Returning me, my ass!
This guy felt the pull between us—I could see it in his hungry eyes. The question was, why was he resisting?
He finished eating first and started cleaning up the empty take-out containers. When I’d eaten everything on my plate, I grabbed his plate with mine and went to clean them in the sink. We tidied up the kitchen like a well-oiled machine, me handing the wet clean plates to Gray to dry and put away. I shut off the faucet, then dried my hands on the plain white hand towel Gray offered.
“It’s late, so let me show you where you will be staying,” Gray announced as I returned the towel to its hanging place on the stove door.
He implied I wouldn’t be staying with him in his big bed. My chances of convincing him not to return me in the morning were growing slimmer.
He grabbed my shoulders and guided me down the hallway to stop us in front of the guest-room door.
My heart sank.
I didn’t want to stay in there alone—I wanted to stay with him.
“This is your bed for the night,” he said as he opened the door for me and gently pushed me inside.
The room was massive, just like the guest room at Polaris headquarters, with a king-size bed, en-suite bathroom, and green hues that reminded me of the deepest part of the forest. But it wasn’t his room or his bed.
“I’ll leave you to it,” Gray said awkwardly as he palmed the back of his neck. “I’ll be down the hall if you have any problems. See you in the morning, Mébh.” He abruptly shut the door.
I had effectively been dismissed.
My Wolf gave a sorrowful howl within me.
I was not about to be dismissed that easily.
A quick shower later, I padded to the door in only a towel.
He had said he was down the hall if I had any problems... Well, my problem was I had nothing to sleep in and wasn’t close enough to him.
~ Gray
I should never have taken her.
I should have sought out Cassius or any of his vampire clan, but no, I just had to fucking take her and now I was having second thoughts about even taking her back.
I stood in the shower attached to the master bedroom, allowing the water to wash the dried blood from my body. She was a complication I couldn’t afford right now. I had to get my memories back, not deal with a precocious teenage werewolf who struggled to control her Wolf and her rage. But then I remembered how easy it was for me to set off my own demonic shift shortly after I fell. I’d had to learn to control my own rage. I saw a little bit of me in her and felt an obligation to help her learn to control herself. It was imperative in the supernatural world.
But at the same time, her eighteen-year-old self made me feel like the crypt keeper by comparison, and I had no business corrupting her to my sexual proclivities as I heartily desired to do. I was a “different fuck toy every night” kind of guy. I didn’t do monogamy, and I didn’t need my lost memories to know that much. I had been a man-whore back in my angelic days before falling. There was effectively no place in my life for this young she-wolf that fate had decreed was mine. I had to return her.
But as I stood under the spray of water, my hard cock ached. I wished it got the memo that the werewolf was off limits. It had been called a monster on multiple occasions, and I felt like one right about now. I reached for it and gave it a feeble stroke, willing the hardness to abate with no luck. I thumbed the gold ring that was pierced through my dick’s slit, one of multiple piercings I possessed. They were another part of the reason Mébh was much too pure and innocent for the likes of me. I couldn’t remember why I was pierced exactly, but I knew it was of special significance. The demonesses back in Shoal went crazy for it, and I only engaged in sexual liaisons with supernatural females who were experienced with my type of hardware. That way, I knew I wasn’t going to hurt them with it. Being able to spy into minds made that part easy.
Mébh hadn’t even stopped aging yet, and though immortal, she was still vulnerable. I didn’t know if she could even handle all of me normally, let alone me fully shifted. She was my fated mate, so the first time we fucked I would shift to my full demonic form, height, horns and all... And damn if the very image of that didn’t turn me on more.
I gave my shaft another stroke and groaned at the feeling, now unable to stop.
I had missing memories and Nicodemus was hot on my trail. I needed to focus on finding a way to reverse the fuckery that Lethe did to my mind, not be lusting after a little she-wolf, mate or not. But I couldn’t stop shuttling my hand up and down my cock and imagining holding her lithe little body down while pounding into her.
I was a dark demon from Hell, with a tarnished soul, cast out of heaven. I didn’t deserve the pure female who I had staying down the hall in my guest room. I never took females home—I fucked elsewhere and promptly left—yet here I was, having broken my own cardinal rule. I’d even gone so far as to put her in my own damned bed earlier. That had never happened before.
I worked myself harder, thinking now of her luscious lips I longed to sample, her warm body in my arms pressed against me, and her pert breasts filling out her sundress. I wanted desperately to suck the little nipples I could just make out under the triangles of her bodice. I wanted to fill her up and watch her come undone in my grasp. I wanted to hear her scream my name as she grabbed my fucking horns.
I tensed and grunted as I exploded, coming hard, and shooting line after line of cum at the shower drain. My heartbeat steadily returned back to normal as I stared at the mess easing down the drain. I hastily grabbed a bar of soap and began scrubbing myself as if to erase what I had just done.
Having come, I was momentarily sated, which allowed me to steel my resolve: she couldn’t stay with me.
Tomorrow I would be returning her to the safety of her pack. The faster I got her away from me and my fucked-up life, the safer she would be.
I finished up in the shower, dried off, and wrapped the towel around my waist. Padding back into the bedroom, I did a double-take at the bed, shocked to find none other than the werewolf, freshly showered with black hair braided, curled up under the covers.
The wily little minx had snuck in here.
I tried spying into her mind with my demonic gift but found it guarded like the several times I’d tried reading her mind before. Lethe had been the only supernatural I had ever had trouble spying on. It worried me that I could not read Mébh’s mind. I hoped it was an off night for my gift or something. Having another unpredictable female around made me anxious.
Mébh let out a soft snore, and I realized without the help of my spy telepathy she was sound asleep already. Somehow this was reassuring. I could easily move her back where she belonged—not in my bed—but the idea of potentially disturbing her slumber didn’t sit well with me. The marks on her forehead had since healed over thanks to her supernatural healing, but she was partially mortal still and needed her sleep, just like she needed food. Protective instincts bloomed in my chest. The desire to keep her safe, happy, healthy, and well fed was growing. Teaching her how to eat with those chopsticks was shockingly exciting. She was ridiculous in her stubbornness, refusing to acknowledge she didn’t know how to use them at first. Yet the way she listened to my instructions and put them into practice was pleasing. She had this spark of life that was intoxicating to be around. Sure, she had some issues with controlling her animal, but the desire to be around her was growing.
I had been afraid of this.
I needed to return her before this went too far, but there was no helping it for the moment.
The bed was an Alaskan king. I decided there was plenty of room for the both of us. I would not touch her, though, for fear of my body’s reaction. My cock was already hardening once again, perking up with interest.
Against my better judgment, I threw on a pair of clean boxers and slid into the bed from the opposite side. Mébh barely stirred as I settled. I realized then that she wore one of my damned V-necks, the only shirt style with a neck hole that would fit over my horns, save for button downs. The dark demon that prowled within me was dangerously pleased to find her in my clothing. Mine. The feeling of possession intensified. I tried to squash it fast, with little success.
I rolled to my side, facing away while actively trying to ignore her, my now-aching shaft, and the darkness inside that longed for her. Her sweet raspberry-evergreen scent invaded my senses and want coursed through my veins.
I never had it this bad before.
Usually I fucked, got it out of my system, and then I left. I didn’t do sleepovers.
I let out a frustrated sigh at the horrible realization that sleep would not be coming easily tonight.