Chapter 10
Chapter Ten
BONTE
Instead of focusing on my own messed-up life, I focus on Naomi, who is equally focusing on me. I’m like a bug she is trying to study. It doesn’t bother me that she finds this fascinating. In fact, I’m finding her fascination equally interesting.
“What was it like growing up with a serial killer for a father?” Naomi is sitting beside me at the kitchen island but is turned toward me. Her elbow rests on the counter with her chin in her palm.
“Can’t I ask you that same question?”
“You think my father is a serial killer?”
“Well, has he killed more than three people with a cooling-off period between the murders?” She wasn’t the only one that watched true crime.
“I have no idea what you speak of.”
“I’m playing imaginary.”
Naomi seems to mull this over. “I suppose in the generic term of the word, he could be classified as such, but his motions are driven by other things. He doesn’t go out searching for a target.”
"I didn't know I was growing up with a serial killer. That wasn't a side of him that he showed me."
"Right, because serial killers can use a rather charming 'mask of sanity' to hide their violent nature. And that's why we don't call you a serial killer," Mac says to Naomi. I don’t know if that’s a joke or not, and I sure as shit ain’t asking.
"I can be charming." She forces a smile.
"That looks painful," I tell her while trying to suppress my laugh, but Mac doesn't.
"I'm working on it, okay? Cut me a break." Naomi shoots Mac a glare that she responds to with a kissy face.
Watching the two of them is entertaining, but it makes me think of Kinsley. We had good banter, and I thought we had this weirdly good chemistry that played well off each other. I really am the worst at reading people, clearly.
Eros comes walking back in the front door where he’d slipped out twenty minutes ago. He tosses Mac the phone she’d given him.
“I think it’s best if we go back to the farm. It's the safest there.” That might be the last place I want to go.
It means I’ll have to see Kinsley and Damon at some point, and I’m not ready to deal with them. That said, if that’s what’s best for everyone, it’s what I’ll do. I don’t want anyone getting hurt because of me, and I know Eros isn’t going to let me give him the slip.
Besides, where would I go? The people that were acting as my parents are dead. If I go back, I’ll be snapped up by the Feds and moved again with a whole new identity. Maybe that wouldn't be the worst thing. At least for the people around me.
“I could take the cat,” Naomi offers. She gives Binx another pet. There are these glimpses of softness you catch with her. They're small, but they’re there.
“You’re not taking our cat,” Eros says before I can respond.
“Ours?” I raise a brow at him.
“You’re mine and he’s yours, so yeah, that makes him mine as well.” I open my mouth to respond to that logic, but again, I’m beaten to the punch.
“Don’t even try to counter it. That’s Marino man logic,” Mac tells me.
“That rationale makes sense to me,” Naomi sides with Eros.
“Okay, Marino men and oftentimes Naomi,” Mac corrects.
“Don’t group me with the men.” Naomi wrinkles her nose at the idea.
I look to Eros. “Come on.” He holds his hand out to me, and I take it, letting him lead me to the bedroom. He shuts the door behind him, but this place is so small I’m not sure that’s doing much.
“I’m okay,” I tell him before he can ask. “And I’ll come to the farm.”
“You’re not fine,” Eros says as I plop down on the bed.
“I’m not, but probably not for the reasons you’re thinking.” I squeeze the bridge of my nose.
“Talk to me.”
“My head is just messed up.” I sigh. “I should be upset they’re dead, but there isn’t anything there.”
“You’re not your father,” Eros quickly reminds me, knowing exactly what path my mind is trying to go down.
“I know, but maybe there’s a little of that part of him in me.
I mean, I’m more pissed at Kinsley and Damon.
And to top it off, I, uh—” I take another deep breath, not wanting to admit this but also wanting to get it out.
“I got excited.” I touch my chest over my heart.
“That might not be the right word, but he’s been watching, and I haven’t been alone as long as I thought. ” There, I said it out loud.
It’s crazy to miss him, but maybe I am crazy. How can Eros be so sure I’m not like my father? Take him, for example. Why is Eros, a man who has killed before and likely will again, the first man I’m drawn to?
Eros drops down to one knee in front of me, making his eyes level with mine.
“You need to stop putting rules on yourself that society has. Just because others think it’s wrong doesn't mean you have to. You can live on your own terms. You can’t help how you feel, and there is no point in fighting it. ”
I snort a laugh. “It’s clear you don’t fight it.” He saw me and then took me. In his mind, that was it. Eros didn’t fight it at all, even when it went against his own family.
“When it comes to you, the only fight I’ll have is if someone thinks they can take you from me.” I can tell from the coldness in his eyes he means that. He leans in closer. “That includes your father.”
“That is not helping my thoughts right now.” I don’t have a clue how to compartmentalize that.
“He might not want me dead,” Eros says, almost making me laugh.
“You took me,” I point out. “Put me in a hole. I think you may be toward the top of his list. I’m just saying.”
“I didn’t put you in a hole, and I got you out.”
A gasp leaves me. “What about—”
“Everyone is on notice. There is no way your father can make it onto the farm and into a house without us knowing.” I nod because the rest of them might not be safe from him.
“As hurt as I am by everyone, I don't want them to get hurt because of me.” And that’s Eros's family. If anyone can understand loving your family even when they do shit you don’t agree with, it’s me.
“No one is going to get hurt.”
“I want to go to the farm.” At least if I’m there and my father somehow shows up, I might be able to talk reason into him. I’m the only one that can.
“I’m going to get us loaded up.” He presses a kiss to my lips before he stands and does just that. It’s not long before we’re on the road and heading toward the farm.
“What happens when we get there? We’ll be together, right? I don’t want to sleep without you.”
“Are you saying I can stop sneaking into bed after you go to sleep and out before you wake up?” He shoots me a smirk.
I’m getting a lot more of those from him the more time we spend together and I open up. I think he’s doing the same, letting me see different parts of him and maybe parts that are for me alone.
“Watch it,” I warn teasingly. “And what about Binx? Is everyone okay with him coming too?” This is going to be strange, staying with his family.
“Yes, I have a room at my parents’ place. I don’t stay there often, but Mom keeps rooms for each of her kids, and they are big. She has fantasies about her kids coming home often and bringing their kids with them. So when they built the house a decade ago, they built it accordingly.”
“I don’t know if that’s sweet or cult-like.”
“I’m sure Naomi can answer that one for you.” I laugh. They had mentioned a bunker and hanging out with them. I’m not sure I’m willing to go with any Marino anywhere or people adjacent to them, except Eros.
"She's strange, but I've been called the same, so…" I shrug. I suppose strange is better than cookie-cutter or generic.
“I’m close with my brothers Jax and Damon, but there are still small groups in the family. Damon and Jax are extra tight, and I have always been extra tight with Mac and Naomi.”
That makes me smile. I’m noticing in the Marino family gender doesn’t set you in a certain role.
“I like them,” I tell him. “Naomi and Mac,” I add to make that extra clear. “Jax and Damon are on my shit list.”
“I don’t think Jax would have known till after the fact.”
“Okay, then the list goes: Damon, Kinsley, and then Jax.”
“Got it.” He nods.
“Got it?”
“Who we are hating right now. I got it.” He flicks a glance over to me. “I’m supposed to hate who you hate, right? That’s what Mac and Naomi say.”
“Okay, I really like them.” I laugh again.
It feels nice. In the short time I have been with Eros, I know he can always lift my mood, and I’m sure part of it is Eros won’t judge me for my thoughts or feelings.
In fact, he’d tell me they are my own and not to give a shit about what others think.
Only you can judge you. Not that I’m going to stop judging people, but I’m still down with this logic.
My mood shifts when we pull up to a giant fancy gate with an M in the middle of it. It opens without Eros having to do anything, and he drives through. I peek behind us to see that Naomi and Mac are still following.
"Wow," I mutter when I see the house ahead with a giant fountain out front. It’s beautiful, reminding me of one of those villas in Italy but a million times bigger with all the stone and a terracotta roof that I’ve heard can cost more than a house.
“Shit,” Eros mutters when he rolls to a stop.
I follow his line of sight to the big archway of the front double doors that are open and have people coming out.
I spot the three people on my shit list. “I’ll deal with them,” he says, and before I can utter a response, he’s out of the SUV and rounding the front.
Eros walks right toward them like a man on a mission. When he pulls back and smashes his fist into the side of Damon’s jaw, I gasp in shock. I was not expecting that, but I suppose he was on a mission.
“Eros!” I shout, throwing open the door.
Sure, Damon deserved that in my book, but I don’t actually want Eros to fight with his brothers.
Not when I have seen how much they stick together and care for each other.
I may have my beef with them, but I would never want to come between him and his family.