Chapter 16
“Congratulations, Your Grace!” old Lady Pointer gushed.
Adelaide had heard the same words many times as she sat in the gardens with the ladies, playing cards, and though she knew it was only a platitude, she enjoyed hearing it all the same.
The truth was, she enjoyed being seen as important. It was not something she had experienced before, having never been the most exciting person in any room she had ever entered, but it was exciting.
“Thank you,” she replied. “I must admit, it has all been so sudden, but I am grateful for the life I have been afforded. I truly am the luckiest lady in the country.”
“And how refreshing to hear someone in your position say as much,” another older lady piped up. “Far too often, ladies are afforded every lovely thing in the world, but they act as though they are in great pain. Yes, you have a duty, but that comes with such goodness.”
“I could not agree more. I could not be more fortunate, and I will never take that for granted.”
All eyes were on her, but she did not feel as though they wanted her to fail. In truth, she felt as though they envied her. And even though she knew it was not a good trait, she liked being envied.
Unfortunately, it was all built on a lie. She was not in a happy and loving marriage as they believed, but a cold and cordial one. Her husband did not adore her, but he did take care of her.
It was not what a lady would dream of, but it was enough. Or so she told herself.
“But, of course,” said a young lady, “there is the matter of how you met.”
She was a pretty lady, but Adelaide thought she rather resembled a fox. She had pointed features, with brown hair and small dark eyes, and there was an iciness to her tone that was not shared by the others.
“It was certainly not conventional.” Adelaide laughed shakily. “I cannot believe that it all transpired as it did.”
“Yes, because you had only just returned to London, had you not?”
There was the judgment she had been dreading. Her skin prickled, wondering how she would explain everything away.
“Ella,” an older woman said sharply, and Adelaide assumed she was the mother. “Now is not the time for this.”
“It is quite all right, Mama. Her Grace will not mind telling us about what happened. I find it all rather romantic.”
They all turned back to Adelaide, and she tried to think of the right thing to say. She knew that they were aware of where she had been and why she had disappeared, so there was no use in lying, but she could phrase it in a way that would dissuade them from questioning her further.
She took a steady breath, then straightened. “Yes,” she sighed. “I will not pretend that I have faced no difficulties. You see, I was betrothed to a man, and I knew that it was not what I wanted for myself.”
“Many ladies feel that way,” Lady Pointer chimed in. “It is all too common for a lady to be engaged to a man she does not want.”
“And it felt unkind,” Adelaide continued. “I could not marry a man and allow him to think that I loved him, when I knew that I never could. I did not want to trap him in a loveless marriage, just as much as I did not want that for myself.”
“And what did he say in response? It was Mr. Hargrave, was it not? He has always seemed like a nice man.”
Adelaide did not want to lie about that. She wanted to be honest, to say that he was a horrible man who had hurt and threatened her, but that was not what they wanted to hear. Any accusation against a man they respected would not be heard, she knew that.
“He did seem that way, yes,” she replied instead.
“He was not happy with my decision, but I will not blame him for that. I am simply happy that it all ended well. I have my husband now, who I truly do care for, and Mr. Hargrave is free to find a lady that will make him happy in a way I could not have.”
That seemed to satisfy them, for the most part, but the young lady—Ella—kept eyeing her narrowly, as though she did not believe her.
“And what say you of the rumor that Mr. Hargrave was attacked by the Duke?”
A few gasps followed, and this time her mother nudged her with more force.
It seemed nobody wished to discuss it, but no one felt that way more than Adelaide. They were married now, and that was supposed to bring an end to the scandal.
She took a moment to gather her thoughts, before turning to Ella and looking her in the eye.
“I do not wish to speak ill of someone I have known for a long time, but Mr. Hargrave is a very prideful man. He has good reason to be proud of what he has achieved, of course, but when he heard that I had fallen for the Duke, he could not understand it.”
She knew it was wrong to invent a tale, but she could not help herself. Fortunately, as neither she nor Cassian had said a word about it, they had a chance to tell their version of events, and she could embellish it every bit as much as Mr. Hargrave had.
“He asked me what I saw in the ‘Dragon’ that I did not see in him,” she continued.
“He accused me of being a social climber, and I could not make him understand that I had spent a year away. In that year, I learned a lot about what I wanted and who I truly was. It just so happened that my husband had everything I wanted in a man.”
There were wistful sighs, and more than one lady put her hand to her chest. If not envied, Adelaide was at least admired, and that was precisely what she wanted.
Ella gave in, and Adelaide barely stopped herself from sighing in relief. At least for the moment, she would not be questioned further.
She had won her first battle.
Cassian smiled when she explained everything in the carriage. She could see the pride on his face, and she was pleased about it, as she had anticipated disappointment. It would have been better if they discussed it before the event, but they had not anticipated being asked in such a way.
“You are brilliant,” he praised. “That is precisely what they wanted. A real story, dramatic and romantic. You are more intelligent than you let people believe.”
“It was only a story,” she laughed. “But thank you.”
“Story or not, it was the right thing to say. Hargrave will not dispute it, should he hear of it, for you have made him sound noble if too prideful.”
“He can dispute it if he wishes. At least, this way, we have made our story known. It is no longer his word against nothing at all.”
“Indeed. However, I must ask… did you need to call me that?”
Adelaide looked at him in confusion. All she had said was that he was her husband and a duke. But then realization dawned on her. She had called him a dragon.
“Do you not like the name?” she asked. “I had assumed it was something from your family.”
“Why would we call ourselves dragons?”
“They are powerful! They are beautiful creatures, too. Why, I once saw a painting of one at an exhibition, and it was my favorite. I do not see what is so terrible about it.”
“And you never will,” he said solemnly. “But do not call me that again. Do you understand?”
“Of course. I apologize, I did not know.”
“No, I know. I cannot blame you for using a term that you must have heard dozens of times.”
She had, and mostly from Cecilia. It had been a mistake to use it, for she should have known that a name her friend used was hardly ever kind. But when the other ladies used it too, she had thought it was normal.
“And how was your time?” she asked after a moment. “Your friend seemed nice.”
“He is. He is far nicer than me. We enjoyed ourselves, and the discussion went well enough. I actually think it will benefit us, as it is about grants for farmers.”
“Ah, so we can help your tenant!”
“Precisely.”
“How wonderful! We can tell him that, and then he will not feel so bad about accepting help from us. It is a shame that your friend does not wish to marry, if he is such a nice man.”
“I have told him that, but he always says that he has yet to find a lady that he likes enough to spend the rest of his life with. When that day comes, he will have no choice. He will be fine once he is married, of that I am certain.”
The words were on the tip of her tongue, and though Adelaide wanted to swallow them, she could not help herself. She was too curious about him, too eager to know more about the man she had married.
“And what of you?” she asked. “How do you feel, now that you are married?”
She did not know what she wanted him to say, as long as he did not say that everything was worse. She could not think of any reason why he would claim to be far happier, but he had to be aware that he was better off with her.
“The same,” he replied bluntly.
Those two words struck her like a blow.
She hated that he had so much power over her. She was not supposed to care what he thought, but she did. He was her husband, and his opinion of her mattered.
“I see,” she muttered.
“That is through no fault of your own, of course. All I mean is that my life has hardly changed. My mother remains in charge, I hardly do anything in my home, and I come and go as I please, as always.”
“So our marriage means nothing to you.”
“No, I—Adelaide, do not be like this. I told you what our marriage would be, and you chose to marry me anyway. I cannot give you the love and affection you expect. We made a sensible decision, and that is all that this will ever be.”
“I know.”
But she did not like it. She had been more than happy to accept his proposal when it was all she could do to escape Hargrave, but it was more than that.
She liked to look upon Cassian, to speak with him. She wanted to know more about him, but every time they made progress, he would push her away. She hated it, but there was nothing she could do.
He was right; she had known what she was getting into, and he was under no obligation to change his mind.
She stared out the window for the rest of the ride.
She did not take his arm when they exited the carriage.