21. I Love MY IKA #2
"But now I feel like love is not just that," she continued. "It's not just about how loudly your heart beats. It's about how deeply it settles inside you."
Rakshit looked at her quietly, his expression unreadable.
She wrapped her arms around herself, as if holding her thoughts together.
She turned her face toward him, her expression calm.
She took a slow breath.
She looked back at the sky, her voice barely above a whisper.
"So... are you in love, Mr. Mahajan?" Shivika asked after composing herself, her voice calm but curious.
Rakshit didn't answer immediately.
Instead, he turned his gaze toward the moon hanging quietly in the sky, its silver light spreading across the open space.
"The moon is beautiful, isn't it?" he said softly.
Shivika froze.
Her heart skipped a beat, and for a moment she forgot how to breathe. She stared at him, trying to understand whether he knew the meaning behind those words or if it was just a coincidence.
He was a reader too. He had read novels, poetry... so did he know? Or was he just saying it casually?
Not hearing her response, Rakshit turned his head toward her. He found her looking at him with a confused, slightly shaken expression.
He knew exactly what she was thinking.
"What happened?" he asked, his tone light, as if nothing heavy had just been spoken. "You don't find the moon beautiful?"
He wanted things to stay normal between them. He knew this was too soon for both of them. He wanted time, and he knew she needed it too.
Some feelings were not meant to be spoken loudly.
Some were meant to be understood silently.
But one thing was clear to him now.
He had realised his feelings for her.
I love her.
I love Shivika.
I love MY IKA.
My Ika.
The thought hit him unexpectedly, making his chest feel heavy and light at the same time.
Damn. How? When?
He didn't know when it happened. He didn't know how it happened. It just did, quietly, naturally, without asking for permission.
"N-No, no, it isn't like that," Shivika said quickly, breaking his thoughts. She looked away, pretending nothing happened.
"Let's go. I am feeling sleepy."
Rakshit nodded, standing up first and extending his hand toward her. She placed her hand in his, and he gently helped her stand.
They walked back to the room in silence, the kind that was filled with too many thoughts on both sides.
Once inside, Rakshit made sure she was comfortable on the bed. He pulled the duvet over her carefully, adjusting it so it covered her properly. She was already looking tired; the day had drained her more than she realised.
He moved toward the vanity table and picked up the small bottle of oil. He had noticed earlier, her steps were slower, her posture slightly strained. She had walked more than she usually did, and her feet were a little swollen.
She hadn't noticed. But he had.
He sat down on the floor beside the bed and gently lifted the duvet from her feet. Slowly, he poured a little oil into his palm and rubbed his hands together to warm it.
By the time he touched her feet, she was already asleep. The moment her back had touched the bed, sleep had claimed her.
Rakshit smiled softly. She really got tired quickly these days.
He started massaging her feet gently, his movements slow and careful, as if she were made of something fragile. His fingers worked over the swelling, applying just enough pressure to ease the strain.
She stirred slightly in her sleep but didn't wake up. Her face looked peaceful, her brows relaxed, her lips parted slightly as she breathed evenly.
He watched her for a few moments, his heart feeling unbearably full.
She didn't know how much she affected him.
She didn't know how deeply he had started to feel.
And maybe, it was better that way for now.
He finished massaging her feet, wiped his hands, and carefully covered her again with the duvet. Then he stood up, switched off the main lights, leaving only the soft bedside lamp on.
Rakshit walked back to the couch where they had been sitting a few moments ago.
He sat down slowly, leaning back, his gaze fixed on the dark sky beyond the open space. The moonlight slipped through the trees, painting everything in soft silver.
Sleep was far away tonight.
His mind was too loud.
He let out a slow breath and rested his head against the back of the couch, closing his eyes.
Since when did everything change?
He didn't remember the exact moment, but he remembered the feeling.
Before Shivika came into his life, everything had been... predictable. His days were structured, controlled, and quiet. He had built his world with discipline and distance. Emotions were something he observed from afar, not something he allowed inside.
And yet, here he was.
Loving someone without even understanding when or how it happened.
He opened his eyes and stared at the empty space in front of him. The couch looked too big now, too quiet.
When did I start smiling?
He used to be known for his seriousness. People called him silent, distant, unapproachable. He had always been that way, and he never felt the need to change. Smiles were rare, laughter even rarer.
But with her...
He chuckled softly, remembering how he had laughed like an idiot while wearing those peacock feathers. If someone had told him a year ago that he would do something so ridiculous just to make a girl talk to him, he would have laughed at the idea.
He ran a hand through his hair, exhaling slowly.
She changed things.
Quietly.
Without trying.
The first day he saw her, she was fragile, surrounded by chaos and fear. He remembered that moment too clearly.
The fear that had gripped his chest when he thought he might lose her, someone he barely knew.
Why was I so scared?
He had seen many injured people before. He had dealt with worse situations. But that day, something had felt different. His heart had raced, his hands had trembled, his mind had refused to stay calm.