Chapter Nineteen
–Ellie–
THERE WAS NO way to properly convey how I felt the first time I laid eyes on Laird Dugal Sutherland, other than he looked familiar. Too familiar with his dark hair and stormy grey eyes.
Could I have seen him in my dreams because he was married to my sister Lilias, and did my dreams tie me to more people and places than even I realized? Or did I see him in the Hereafter when he crossed paths with Tavish and his kin over the years? It was impossible to know.
What I did know was how I felt when he tossed me on his horse and brought me back to Sutherland Castle. After he raked his eyes over me with such blatant lust, there could be no doubt he was every bit the monster everyone claimed him to be.
So being on his horse, tucked between his thighs, was a test in patience.
Of fighting nausea when he clamped his big hand over my thigh roughly, possessively, and inhaled my scent, not as if he cherished it but owned it.
As if he intended to consume it along with the rest of me until there was nothing left but a soulless husk.
“If it were not for my mother,” he said huskily in my ear at one point, “I would take ye here and now for all my men to see. Take ye until yer inner beast surfaced to protect ye, then I would take her too. Make ye both suffer for evading yer rightful mate and master, for so long.”
Rather than show him even an ounce of the fear he so craved, I remained unresponsive, saying nothing as my skin crawled at the feel of his vile body against my back.
And I stayed silent even when Sutherland Castle loomed ahead with my mighty elm standing proudly on its outskirts, silently damning me to my awful destiny.
Yet still, it gave me strength, even hope, and I couldn't say why, other than it tied me to Tavish.
Tied me to his first shift beneath such an elm in another life, and how determined his dragon had been to protect me.
While that was impossible now, it still lent me comfort.
Better yet, it helped me keep my chin up because some small part of him, even if only a tree, would forever be here for me to gaze upon, keeping him here with me in spirit.
While the castle was lovely enough with its soft curves cradled by woodland, backdropped by the blue-green sea, all I saw was a prison.
A prison where I would spend the rest of my days suffering the touches of the monster at my back, my only refuge being the children I might bear with him, because I would never blame them for the acts of their father.
Fortunately, Dugal ceased his untoward advances and threats as we rode into the courtyard, but maybe that would have been preferable to the monster I met next.
If I knew nothing else, as he swung down and yanked me after him, was that his mother, Elspet, was not only the true power here, but she would relish every moment watching me wither at her son’s hands.
Doing my best not to let her see my terror because it was palpable, I held my head high and stood as tall as I could, refusing to let her intimidate me, but it wasn’t easy.
Not when I saw the dark aura fluctuating around her, telling me she’d been spewed out by the Hereafter upon birth and only ever moved forward with a sinister spirit.
With her grey hair tied tightly back, she peered down her nose and assessed me with her black, beady eyes, her sharp gaze homing in on my tattoo, and that was it.
The extent of her greeting beyond a sharp nod saying I would suffice, before spinning on her heel and barking orders at someone who could only be Lilias in passing.
“See her out of those blasted colors, then have her escorted to our dining chamber.”
Although tempted to smile at my lovely sister with her earthy skin tone, soft features, light brown hair, and dark olive-green eyes, I knew better.
So, I acted like I didn't know her lest it bring the wrath of her mother-in-law or traitorous husband down on her. A husband who thought nothing of having his wife see to his mistress’s needs.
Rather, he raked his lustful eyes over me one last time and strode after his mother.
It seemed they weren't concerned about having me and Lilias watched closely, like they had been with my sisters, since they allowed us to be alone together without a guard. I guess they knew nothing would be taking Dugal’s witch from him this time.
I was his, having willingly sacrificed myself for the greater good.
And the MacLeods were no longer a threat.
Not to say Clan Sutherland wasn’t still taking defensive measures surrounding the castle, they clearly were, so getting out of here would be impossible anyway.
Lilias remained quiet as she led me into a great hall vastly different from the MacLeod’s. There wasn’t a dragon in sight, be it in a tapestry or carved into the furniture.
While I wanted to ask her if she had seen Blaze, I suspected he was likely somewhere near Marjorie, considering they had become fast friends. The little wolf even spoke telepathically to her, despite not communicating with anyone else that way.
Lilias proceeded to say all the things one might say to a stranger who was moving in, pointing out various doorways in the great hall and telling me where they led. “I will, of course, give ye a more thorough tour when ‘tis appropriate.”
“Thank you,” I managed, trying to keep my emotions from my face because, despite only being here mere minutes, I couldn’t imagine spending the rest of my life here. It felt nothing like MacLeod Castle.
Nothing like home.
Lilias led me up a set of stairs that ran along the back of the great hall and down corridors that were narrower than those at MacLeod Castle, then up several more flights.
The only relief I found in this place, other than Lilias, was Tavish’s lingering presence in my mind.
Yet I feared once I shifted and became mated with Dugal, he would find a way to push Tavish out.
I wasn’t sure how, but I sensed once he became aware of another male dragon in my mind, he would be capable of anything. Especially since he considered Tavish his enemy, even though the pact was supposed to bring peace.
Lilias opened a door and ushered me into a sizeable room with a large, fur-covered bed, several ornate furnishings, and a breathtaking view of the ocean.
“This will be yer chamber.” Lilias’ expression was troubled and with good reason. “At least one of them.”
“And the other is?” I prompted as she shut the door behind us and visibly slumped with relief when we were out of earshot of others.
“Nowhere ye want be, sister, and ‘twill be far more often than ye’re in this one.” I felt Tavish tense right along with me as her eyes welled, and she shook her head.
“I cannae tell ye how much I wish ye hadnae come because no one deserves the likes of Dugal.” She took my hand and squeezed it, looking at me with all the love one might feel for their sister.
“Yet ‘tis so verra nice to meet ye, Elowyn.”
“You as well, Lilias. Call me Ellie.” I looked at her with just as much compassion, unsure how much I should share. How much she actually knew. “I’m so incredibly sorry you’ve been trapped here for so long, forced to marry someone you don’t love.”
“It hasnae been easy,” she confessed. “But at least I have wee Marjorie.” Her voice went whisper-soft. “And I’ve always had Evan, even if only from afar, so that helped me feel less alone.” Her voice grew softer still. “And when I could slip away, I visited our father whenever he was in our era.”
My heart leapt into my throat. “So you’ve seen him over the years?”
She encouraged me to bathe in a basin that had been prepared for me, her voice growing sad. “I have seen him, and before you ask, aye, I was the one who banished him. I didnae want to, but Elspet gave me no choice.”
“So the rumors are true,” I said, still feeling Tavish right there in my mind as well as my sisters and their mates, always welcoming, comforting presences and most certainly interested in this conversation. “You really are that powerful.”
“When it comes to animals, aye,” Lilias said as I undressed and climbed into the tub while she pulled clothes out of a trunk. “Or should I say a mutual trust in each other that makes them willing to do my bidding?”
“I don’t understand.” I shook my head. “What does that have to do with keeping someone as powerful as our father away?”
“At Elspet’s order, I had no choice but to command the animals not to let him near the castle until I say otherwise,” she murmured, almost as if it pained her to voice it.
“As I am sure ye ken, too many animals can overwhelm a dragon, even one such as our father.” She laid out clothing and sighed.
“And I cannae tell ye how heartbreaking it was to do that to him when all he ever did was love this clan, yet ‘twas for the best because he and Mother couldnae stay.”
“So you know everything?” I said, my heart going out to her.
“I do,” Lilias confirmed, a soft, accepting smile curling her mouth.
“And though ‘twas disheartening to know they would birth four more daughters destined to be part of this horrific pact, I took comfort in knowing I would someday meet ye all. ‘Twas also heartening to know my beloved mother would be safe and free from Elspet’s clutches.”
“Even as you suffered them,” I managed, biting back tears. “Again, I’m so very sorry.”
“Dinnae be.” Lilias sat beside me and offered a warm smile, her eyes lighting up when she continued talking.
“As I said, ‘twas as it had to be.” She shook her head.
“Otherwise, we wouldnae have our lovely wee Marjorie because she is a rare treasure.
‘Tis what our father calls her. Our wee rare treasure.”
“I don’t doubt she is, and I look forward to meeting her.” I cocked my head. “So she’s met Malcolm?”
“Aye.” Her voice grew especially soft now.
“Ye see, after father claimed mother had died, I was ordered to cast him out of not only this castle but off Sutherland territory. And whilst far too dangerous for Mother to travel back to this era, our father could as long as he remained in areas hidden by MacLomain magic.”
A small, devious smile turned up the corner of her mouth as she continued.
“Little did Elspet or her horrid son know the verra magic I was forced to use to banish my father was also the same magic that allowed me and my wee daughter to visit him over the years. For the animals of the forest are as much Marjorie’s as they are mine, and we are theirs. ”
“That’s why he traveled back so often,” I realized, reflecting on my sisters' journey back to their mates, and Hazel seeing him.
“And to areas hidden by MacLomain magic no less.” I shook my head when it all became so clear.
“Should I assume, then, Adlin knew about that? Knew so much more than he told me?”
“Och,” Lilias admonished, looking skyward and smiling. “Adlin always knows much more than he shares, but ‘tis half his charm, is it not?”
“I haven’t known him as long as I suspect you have, but I would say so if it makes you smile.
” I met her smile with one of my own. “And if his clan’s powers had anything to do with these magical areas scattered throughout Scotland, which allowed you and Marjorie to spend time with our father and escape this castle, then he has my eternal thanks.
” I eyed her curiously. “I can’t help but wonder, though, if you and Marjorie could break free of Elspet’s clutches, why not vanish into the future with Malcolm? Why not get away from your husband?”
“And risk leading them to our mother or worse yet, my sisters?” She shook her head.
“Nay, it couldnae happen. ‘Twas far too dangerous, because no matter what, the sorcerer’s pact had to be fulfilled, and ye and our sisters were always going to be at the heart of that whilst I fulfilled my obligations here. Ye were necessary. Necessary for a peaceful future.” Pain filled her eyes again as she looked at me.
“I just wish it wasnae at yer expense, Ellie.” She shook her head. “With all my heart, I wish it.”
“Do you know why it was me?” I wondered, hoping she could shed some insight. “Because somehow I always knew it would be. And if that isn’t daunting enough, Dugal is familiar to me and I can’t say why.”
“Nor I.” She shook her head again. “Our father never said why one of us would suffer more than the others, only that one of us would.”
“Though I’d beg to say you suffered just as much,” I countered gently, because she had, no matter how positive she chose to remain.
“Nay,” she said, swallowing hard before she told me the last thing I wanted to hear. Something that explained why I had been given such a lovely room meant for those of importance, and it made my blood run cold.