3
May 20, 2021
D ear Nana,
It’s been a crazy month. I know you’ve probably been worrying about me, so let me assure you that I have settled in nicely, and the knives are all in place so you can relax. I’ve also cleaned the house top to bottom as soon as I moved in, so I’ve done everything the way you taught me to, and it has helped me get used to the space a bit.
Moving to a new house and a new pack is much more stressful and time-consuming than I had imagined. And becoming Luna of a pack on top of that? When others do it, it seems so easy.
Luckily I have my mother-in-law, Florence, to help me navigate the process. She is wonderful and I am aware how lucky I am that she is not mean like your mother-in-law was. (May she rest in peace.)
She came to meet me as soon as we arrived in Greylock, and then came to our house for dinner the week after that. I made your beef stew with homemade bread, and both she and Dominic really liked it.
Florence wanted to know all about my trousseau, since I had finally unpacked it and put all the things up. She didn’t know that it was our mating custom, so she and Dominic then asked me all sorts of questions about how long each piece took, what made me choose certain colors, where I learned to weave, embroider, and sew, and so on.
Here, the males and females go to high school together, and they are all taught the same skills, so our ways seem odd to them. Many of their females choose to work outside the home.
I thought back to the dinner in question.
Florence really loved the tablecloth I’d made and Dominic asked, “How many hours did this take?”
He was really quiet after I’d told him it took close to 80 hours of embroidering for the tablecloth alone.
“ And did you think of anything specific as you were working on it?” he asked after a while.
“ I – I imagined the pieces in their future home. I imagined my future family eating meals at a table set with this tablecloth. My life with my mate, you know,” I trailed off, my face heating.
Florence started talking about the mating customs of her old pack, Spruce Mountain, and then I asked about Greylock’s, and they both kind of froze.
“ From the age of 15,” Dominic finally said, “we write monthly letters to our mate, which we give them upon meeting them. This helps them learn about us, but it also lets them know we’ve been thinking of them before we knew them.”
I felt a pang of hurt at the thought that someone else had already gotten letters that were supposed to be mine. Dominic absentmindedly rubbed his chest as Florence looked between the two of us with a worried look on her face.
The neighborhood we live in is really nice. On one side, our neighbors are the Beta couple, Elliot and Grace Ripley. She’s from Colorado and I like her a lot. Our other direct neighbor is Lillian Phelps, the pack chef. She’s widowed with grown pups who’ve moved away for work. Her food is amazing! And it made me remember Mary, so please tell her I said hi next time you see her.
I already got to know the pack territory pretty well. Dominic’s wolf showed me every corner of it when we went hunting together. Sometimes it’s difficult to reconcile the two sides of him. I don’t know if that makes sense. Dominic is very quiet, serious, and pensive. His wolf, on the other hand, is carefree and playful. Have you ever met a male like that?
Father’s wolf, for instance, is even scarier than he is, and Isaac is exactly the same no matter what form he takes. I’d like to think you and I are both in accord with our wolves. As I’m thinking about this, I can’t remember if I’ve ever seen Eden shift. It can’t be possible, though, can it? And Lord only knows what Evie’s wolf will be like once she shifts.
Florence took me to the pack offices during my second week in the pack, where she introduced me to everyone. I met Dominic’s uncle, Oliver Hedge, and his mate, Rosemary. Oliver used to be my late father-in-law’s Beta, and he led the pack after his death, until Dominic came of age. They are both wonderful wolves.
Unfortunately, they weren’t blessed with pups of their own, but they’ve poured all their energy into the pack and they did such a wonderful job. Everyone loves and respects them a lot.
Even now, although he should be retired, Oliver takes over the Alpha duties whenever Dominic needs to travel for work, which he does a lot. He was away a whole week this month, promoting the University and recruiting students in Kansas, and I think it will be like that every month.
I shuddered as I remembered the intensity with which he took me the night before his trip and then again on the morning of. For the next two days, all I could think of was the heat in his eyes and I couldn’t wait for him to come back so we could do it again.
Then, on the third day, I finally let myself snoop through Cassie’s stuff, and I spent hours looking at the photos of the two of them, just torturing myself with how she was hanging off of him in pictures. I wondered if he’d left her alone this much.
When Dominic finally came back, he dropped his bags at the door, grabbed me, and took me right there against the wall. And I loved it. It was the most shamelessly wanton thing I had ever done in my life.
Just remembering it made everything inside me clench. I could be home alone, washing the dishes, and suddenly I’d hear his husky voice talking me through it. Being with him was all I could think of.
Unfortunately, Dominic was always at work for most of the day. Sometimes he’d get back when I was already asleep. The dipping of the mattress would wake me and I’d turn to face him.
“ Hi,” I’d said on one such occasion.
“ Why are you whispering?”
“ We’re in the dark.”
He chuckled and reached for me like I’d hoped he would. But in the morning, he was gone again. It was hard not to be somewhat disappointed. I knew how busy he was, so I wrote about it, more for myself than for Nana.
Not only is Greylock the third-largest pack in the country, but it is also unique since it consists of the original pack site, which is about twice the size of Uinta and the college town where Isaac now lives (thank you for sending me all that stuff, by the way), which is 40 minutes away by car.
A lot of our wolves live in the pack and commute to work in the college town, but most of them work at the University Hospital here, which is huge. The medical, nursing, and midwifery students all do their clinics, rounds, and residencies here, and wolves from all over the country travel here to be treated by specialists. It is all quite advanced and fancy and I feel out of place a lot of the time.
Florence told me that the Luna duties I’ll be expected to perform (in addition to the “regular ones”, like attending the Alpha Summit, etc.) will mostly have to do with the supplies and budget for schools for pups aged 0- and primary and middle school – the Alpha’s office deals withhigh school and the Shifter University.
I’ll also be expected to set up “Mommy and Me” programs for she-wolves with young pups, as well as to plan and organize educational and recreational programs for pregnant she-wolves – which is something we don’t have back home, so I’ll have to learn about that first.
Luckily, Florence took me to lunch with a group of her friends who are all around her age, and a lot of them will be working with me in different areas of my duties, so I can ask them for any help I might need.
One of them is Doctor Vera Jackson, she used to come to our pack to talk to Father after Evie was born, do you remember? She remembered me, and I was so surprised since it was so long ago.
I stopped writing for a moment, remembering how Vera had looked at me when I started introducing myself, and her slight frown.
“ Of course I remember you, Luna Penelope. It’s wonderful to see you again.”
All the females were so warm and welcoming.
The other females at the lunch were Ariadne Wheeler, the pack’s head doctor; Ophelia Williams, a history professor, Sonya Smirnova, the Dean of the College of Education, and Catherine Bell, who they all call Kitty, a linguistics professor.
I don’t need to tell you how intimidated I felt among all these smart females, but they couldn’t have been kinder and more down to earth.
Ophelia told me that all the students at SU have two summer classes that they have to take before they graduate, regardless of what they are majoring in; one is literature, and the other one is history. So even a medicine student would have to learn about history, isn’t that neat? Ophelia teaches one, and Kitty’s mate teaches the other.
She said enrolling in these classes would be a perfect opportunity for me to meet wolves my age and learn about Massachusetts since both classes include three separate day trips to different parts of the state. I was confused by the suggestion at first since they’re mixed classes, and I am also not a student at SU, but both Dr. Vera and Florence assured me that this was normal in Greylock and that Dominic would approve of my enrolling. I checked with him and he also assured me it was fine.
It was so difficult to exist in a place where one didn’t know all the rules or the limits of what was acceptable or desirable. I knew for a fact that Father would not want me to take this class, he’d consider it a waste of time. Not to mention the fact that I’d be around unmated males. I was constantly worried that I was doing something wrong or somehow embarrassing myself here.
I remembered the day Florence took me to meet Kitty’s mate, Prof. Mirko Bell, who’d be my literature professor if I decided to enroll in the class. I briefly felt sad that it was never Dominic introducing me to our pack members or showing me around, let alone showing me off.
“ Ah, Penelope, the Weaver,” Prof. Bell said with a smile when I introduced myself.
“ How... how do you know that I like to weave?” I asked, confused.
He laughed with his entire body, and I immediately liked him, although I was slightly self-conscious since I’d said the wrong thing again.
“ Penelope is also the name of a character from the Odyssey. She was the queen of Ithaca and a faithful wife who waited twenty years for Odysseus’ return. Not to go into too much detail, but she spent a lot of that time weaving,” he grinned and I found myself grinning back.
“ I’ll have to read that story sometimes.”
So I met with Professor Bell and decided to enroll in the class. I even went to the campus and filled out all the paperwork! I’ll enclose a copy of my syllabus so you can see what we’ll be reading and where we’ll be traveling. Hank was trying so hard not to laugh at how nervous I was!
Hank Miller is the driver Dominic assigned to take me places. Seeing how Dominic's first mate died in a car accident, he doesn’t want me behind the wheel. I don’t care either way, so I figured: why not be accommodating to something that’s important to him? Hank is maybe Beta Aaron’s age and is currently expecting his first grandpup.
I thought about how lovingly Hank talked about his mate while he was showing me photos of his family. With pathetic envy in my heart, I remembered how impatient he was when a traffic jam made it seem like he was going to be late for dinner.
That same night I ate my dinner alone, again. At least Isaac was close by now and would be visiting me on the weekends.
We already had our introductory class, where I met my new classmates. I really liked two she-wolves - Lynn Howard and Charlotte Fuller. They actually used to be roommates before Lynn found her mate. Lynn is from your old pack in Georgia; her maiden name is Brownson, and she knows the Clarks (such a small world!), so we bonded over that. She’s a third-year medical student.
Charlotte is from Washington and is in her final year of midwifery school. I think she has only a semester of practical work left. I also met their friend Anthony DeLuca, who is from the New Jersey pack. He is in his final year of nursing school but also works as a photographer in his spare time. I admire all of them so much for dedicating their lives to healing.
I didn’t want to tell Nana that I was hiding the fact that I was a Blessed Hansen from all my classmates. It was difficult enough telling them I was technically their Luna – I’d worried they wouldn’t want to befriend me because of it. Charlotte and Lynn, however, immediately sympathized with my situation.
Lynn thoughtfully said: “Finding out you’re mated to a widower must have been a bitter pill to swallow,” and it was the first time that I heard someone validate how difficult this had been for me in some ways. Others had mentioned our circumstances on different occasions, but it was never with emphasis on how I was feeling about things.
“ I heard the last Luna died in a car crash.”
“ Anthony!”
“ What? I also heard her wolf wasn’t able to heal her because there was wolfsbane in her system.”
“ Why would there be wolfsbane in her system?” I asked, confused.
I’d never heard of anyone voluntarily ingesting that vile plant.
“ Oh, wolves take it for many different reasons,” Charlotte shrugged, “but the majority of them do it when they want to get drunk. It stops the body from burning through the alcohol too quickly and then they can get a buzz going.”
Our pack didn’t drink, so I couldn’t imagine a single reason for any wolf, let alone a Luna, to be ingesting alcohol laced with wolfsbane, but as I was quickly learning, there was a whole wide world out there that I knew nothing about.
Meeting all these successful wolves has got me thinking a lot about my purpose in life. I know that, as Luna, I can make a difference, so I really want to do a good job with that. Florence reassures me that she will be there to help me every step of the way, and it means a lot. As a former Luna yourself, I’d appreciate any advice you could give me on the matter. As different as the two packs are, there are some things about our kind that transcend pack boundaries.
Speaking of pack differences, they have all kinds of services here that we don’t – for instance, there’s an Omega called Marley that runs her own grocery service. We hired her and it's been wonderful; our pantry and cupboards are stocked with all that we need after we both come home after a long day working at the pack house.
She even gets fancy new teas for me to try. I just wrote “green tea” on the list and the first time, she bought the generic brand, but then the next time, she got me an amazing new blend to try. I’ll have to ask her to buy more so I can send you some. I’m sure they don’t have anything like it at Neeleman’s store.
While I’m on the topic of stores, I have to tell you I went and picked out a wonderful, huge, comfortable new couch for our living room. The previous one was small and not meant for sitting. I know that doesn’t make sense since it was a couch, but believe me, there’s no other way to describe it.
I also bought a big solid wood dining room table for 12. Now, when you all come to visit me, we’ll all be able to sit down at dinner together and then spend time in the living room in the evening.
She’ll notice my mate wasn’t present for any of the things I did outside the house this month.
I kind of wanted to surprise Dominic with the new furniture when he came back from his trip. He liked it a lot.
Not a lie.
He really did like both purchases. He made me ride him on the new couch as soon as it was delivered. He’d talked the whole time. I don’t know why, but that made it a million times more enjoyable.
I drew the line at doing anything on the dining table, that’s where you eat. To be fair, he did propose a form of eating, but still.
I gotta run now, Nana. As you’ll be able to see from the syllabus, the first author we are dealing with is a Mr. Henry David Thoreau, so I have to get started on reading Nature and Walden . I hope I'll enjoy the class and the reading assignments. I haven’t felt such jitters about school since Miss Thompson’s art class, do you remember her? Whatever happened to her?
Next month, I should try to sit down and write a bit every weekend because that way my next letter would be less jumbled and would have a nicer flow. That way, I’d also be less likely to forget anything important. So much is happening so quickly.
Give my love to everyone back home. I am looking forward to reading your letter soon.
Your (hopefully) favorite granddaughter,
Penelope
P.S. I just KNEW I was forgetting something!
One day, I came home and as I was unlocking the door, I said hi to my neighbor Grace, who was sitting on her porch with a friend, so she introduced us, and you’ll never guess who the friend was!
Margaret Cranch, the female who will be replacing Martha Anderson as the new columnist for Lipstick&Claw’s advice column! I couldn’t believe my own eyes, it was like meeting a famous person. I can’t wait to see her advice style, she has some big shoes to fill.
She said she wanted to “revamp it” a bit so it’ll be more suited to “female needs,” but I don’t really know what she meant by that since it’s always been a female magazine that female readers send in questions to. But I’m rambling at this point, and I have a lot to do, so I’ll be going now.
I love you, Nana, take care!
P.