Chapter Twenty-Eight
When I woke the next morning, I knew what I had to do.
Not having the courage to talk to him directly, I texted after breakfast.
I’m sorry I’ve been distant , I began after the greeting. I’ve got a lot of things to think about.
No response. No little dots.
I waited.
Finally, he responded.
I hope when you’re done thinking, we get to talk.
Yes , I typed.
Good.
I took a deep breath and then asked, Could I come ride Star? By myself?
Again, the moments of no response.
When do you want to come?
This morning.
I have a golf game this morning, but Juan will be here. He can help you.
Then it’s okay?
Yes.
Thank you , I typed.
It’s good to hear from you , he wrote.
I wasn’t quite sure how to respond to that. I wasn’t ready to talk to him yet.
Thank you again. I’ll be in touch soon , I wrote.
Good. I’ll tell Juan to expect you.
I put my phone down, an ache in my chest. He was a good man, but I wasn’t ready to give him the answer he wanted.
“Would you mind if I took the car this morning?” I asked Liz. “I know you said you wanted to paint last night, but I’ll be back around lunchtime.”
“No problem,” she said, stretching. “I’m feeling lazy this morning. I think I’ll just sit around, drink coffee, and read a book.”
“I’ve got a report I’ve got to finish for my client,” Diane said. “I don’t need it either. ”
“Where are you going?” Liz asked.
“Horseback riding. Alone,” I said, forestalling any questions about Rodrigo.
A half hour later I was at the ranch. Juan was waiting for me.
“Dad said you were coming by to take Star out for a ride.”
“Yes. I wanted to ride up to that meadow he’s taken me to a couple of times.”
“I know the one. It’s a lovely spot. Let me get you saddled up.”
“It’s okay,” I said with a smile. “I know my way around.”
“Sure?”
“Positive.”
“Let me know if you need anything,” he said. With a wave, he walked back toward the main house.
I walked to the corral through the barn. Star was waiting for me, greeting me with lots of head bobbing and nickers.
“Hello, you beautiful girl. Shall we go for a ride? Just the two of us?” I snapped on her lead, and she followed me into the barn.
Less than a half hour later we were out on the trail. She was prancing as much as walking, as if she was as anxious as I was to get out of the house.
When we reached the flat spot, I let her have her head, keeping low on her neck so I didn’t get knocked off by a branch again. She ran faster than I’d ever let her go. The wind streamed her mane and my hair behind us, the fresh air feeling like it was cleansing my mind of cobwebs and painful events of the past. Soon all I was aware of was the bunching of muscles beneath my legs and the thunder of Star’s galloping hooves.
I let her run as long as the trail allowed it. When I finally pulled her in, I was amazed to find I had tears running down my face. I thought I’d shed them all the day before.
Once I’d finished sobbing, Genna had draped a knit blanket over me and told me to sleep. Quietly, she began to clean up around me. By the time I awoke, she’d brought in my loom and her wheel.
“How about an old movie?” she asked. “I’ve got some herbal tea brewing.”
I nodded, unable to speak.
She’d found an old romance on one of the streaming stations, and we’d settled in. When the movie was over, I’d felt sufficiently recovered. We’d bid our goodbyes, and I’d headed home, grateful to have met someone as kind, generous, and understanding as she was.
There were lots of good people throughout the country, I’d discovered. We needed to stop looking for what makes us different and concentrate on how we are the same.
As Star slowed, I wiped my eyes.
Then I gave her lots of pats. “Good girl,” I said. “That was a nice run, wasn’t it?”
She nodded her head, the bridle jangling with her still pent-up energy.
It was obvious she needed more exercise than she was getting. If I were here, I’d ride her almost every day. Never had I been so in tune with a horse, or any animal for that matter.
I let Genna’s revelations from the day before play out in my mind. She’d told me she’d had to thoroughly let go of the past in order to be able to love again. “Not everyone is Michael,” she’d said.
She was right. I was painting Rodrigo’s actions with the brush I’d learned to use from my late husband. It wasn’t fair to him. I did need to clear the air.
And then what? I felt like I was falling in love with him—probably what had made me so ready to run—but was I sure? Didn’t I need a lot more time to be sure?
Romantic movies and books had plenty of “instalove” plots, but I wasn’t sure I was built that way.
But what was I going to learn about Rodrigo that I didn’t know already? Yes, there were a few things that were bothering me, but simply asking the questions would resolve those issues one way or the other.
His family loved him, people at church had nothing but good things to say about him, and he’d always treated me with kindness and respect.
My sisters had had the advantage of knowing the people they fell in love with again. Both had second chances with someone they’d cared for once.
Not only was Rodrigo a stranger two months ago, but his culture, and that of the state of Texas, were very different from the one I’d spent my life knowing. People in Montana were close knit. Call someone in the government, and a real person answered the phone. It might likely be someone I knew.
Things were changing as newcomers brought “efficiencies,” but the old ways were pretty entrenched. Montanans liked to do business with people they’d seen in the flesh and shaken hands with.
Somehow, I didn’t think the Texas government worked that way.
If I made the decision to come back, I was taking a chance on more than the man.
What if I hated Texas? Would I make our lives miserable?
No, I had to decide on the whole thing.
We reached the meadow, and I slid off the horse to lead her to the stream to drink.
Rodrigo said he’d be willing to spend time in Montana. With our children taking over our respective ranches, we’d both have more time.
Maybe I’d take up golf.
I laughed out loud at the image of me teeing off and my club going sailing like it had at the miniature golf place.
Maybe we could go to Hawaii. I’d always wanted to see the islands. Or even farther, to Australia where they had all those bizarre animals.
There was a lot I needed to discuss with Rodrigo.
But first I needed to decide if I was really in love with him.
Or did I?
Didn’t I really know that already?
“What do you think?” I asked the horse.
Star kept drinking, but shifted her feet.
Her rear pushed against me.
While I’d been thinking, I’d moved closer to the edge of the stream. What I hadn’t realized, was that I was standing on an unstable edge.
The shifting of the horse made me change my own balance. The bank crumbled beneath me, and I pitched forward into the stream.
“No!” I yelled as I twisted my body to avoid doing too much damage. As it was, I landed hard on one hip, but I had plenty of padding there.
That wasn’t the worst of my problems.
“Yikes!” I screamed. “That’s cold!”
Star took her head out of the water and stared at me.
I pulled myself to standing, an effort that made me even wetter.
“This is all your fault,” I scolded Star.
She gave me a horse’s version of the stink-eye and went back to drinking.
Great. What was it with O’Sullivan women and water? Diane had fallen in several times when she’d gone out with Joe. Liz had landed in a pond.
And here I was, dripping wet from a stream.
At least Rodrigo wasn’t here to see me.
I pulled off my boots and emptied them before putting them back on.
Careful of where I put my feet, I led Star away from the stream and got back into the saddle, my soaking wet pants landing with a wet plop on the leather.
Hopefully, I’d dry out a bit before we got back to the stable.
My hope was ill-founded. The air around San Antonio wasn’t nearly as dry as that of my home state. And Star wanted to play a bit when I hosed her down, causing me to drench my shirt all over again. Somehow I managed to get the tack off the horse, and the animal cleaned up and back in her corral without Juan showing up.
Once I was done, I hustled to the Jeep and made my escape.
~ ~ ~
“What happened to you?” Liz asked when I walked into the RV.
“Don’t ask,” I said.
“I just did,” she said.
Diane looked up from where she was working on the computer. She looked me up and down, then grinned.
“You fell into the water!” she exclaimed.
Liz took a closer look.
“You did!”
“Damn horse pushed me in,” I said. “It was nothing.”
“Oh, it was everything,” Liz said.
“True love,” Diane said.
“With my horse?” I asked.
“With the man,” Diane said.
“He was nowhere around me,” I said. “I went riding by myself, remember?”
“Doesn’t change a thing,” Liz said. “It’s the O’Sullivan curse. Fall in love?” She extended one arm, palm up. “Fall in water.” The other arm took the same position.
“You two,” I said.
“Admit it,” Diane said, her tone serious. “You love him. Or you’re falling in love with him. So what are you going to do about it?”
I wanted to deny her assertion, but suddenly I was tired of trying to fight what was evident to everyone, including me.
“I’m not sure,” I said. “There are still issues, things that need to be discussed. And the logistics are crazy.”
“Got that,” Liz said. “But if he’s the right man, then you’ll find a way to make it work. It’s as simple as that.”
I hoped she was right because, to my surprise, I was ready to take a leap for love.