Chapter 5
It was a quiet wedding, precisely what Beatrice had always wanted.
Unfortunately, it was not with the grandeur befitting a duke. Outside, the ton was abuzz with excitement, and as Beatrice waited to walk down the aisle, she tried in vain not to listen to them.
“They seem happy about the match,” her father commented, “and with all things considered, we cannot ask for much more than that.”
Beatrice could only nod as she smoothed her demure white gown.
It had not been as intricate as she had imagined, but t the simplicity of the garment could not be helped on such short notice.
She felt deserving of everything that was happening to her, with the exception of the title she was to receive.
She was not the right sort of lady to be a duchess, and while her friends had come to enjoy their roles in Society, she could not believe that the same thing could happen to her.
The music began, signaling that she was to enter the church hall, but all that she could wonder was whether or not her friends would miraculously be there.
They had received invitations at her husband-to-be’s request, for he thought it would be wise to have the dukes and duchesses there, but there was no telling whether they would have the time to arrange everything or not.
Everything, including a special license, had been put in place in the span of a week, after all.
The doors were thrown open, and Beatrice stood before the longest walk of her life. With every step, she worried that she would trip on her skirts, or step badly and stumble as she had done in Hyde Park. When she finally reached the altar, she stood in silence until her vows, which she mumbled.
The Duke smiled at her throughout, and she knew that he was trying to encourage her, but she could not stand it.
He was being so kind to her, but she knew how angry he truly was.
She glanced away at the seats and saw Helena sitting there, smiling at them.
It was a dutiful smile, and Beatrice could see the panic in her face, hiding.
As the Duke recited his vows in turn, Beatrice tried to listen, but her thoughts were plagued by the fact that she was to steal Helena’s life from her.
Beatrice would have been happy enough as a spinster, but Helena would not survive as an unmarried mother, even if the Duke swore that he could protect her too.
She blinked and glanced at her fiancé, who was looking at her expectantly. She realized then that she had not been listening to the vicar, and when her new husband leaned forward to kiss her she almost pulled away instinctively.
But she knew what he wanted, and that it was expected of her.
It was awkward, a peck on the lips that signified that she was now a wife, and very little more.
She knew that her husband saw it that way too, but she was all too aware that the burning in her chest was not shared.
She took his arm, and as they left the church and smiled at their guests, she saw her friends at last.
Emma, Cecilia, and Dorothy were sitting together with their husbands, in complete shock.
Beatrice had not written to them herself about the wedding, and she wondered if she perhaps should have, but she was too busy being pleased that they were there.
This way, she would at least have an enjoyable day before disappearing to her new home, possibly forever.
“You did rather well,” the Duke said as they returned to his London home for the wedding breakfast. “Though I must say, I was expecting you to have that same clear voice that you had at the first wedding.”
“Your Grace, I–”
“In light of the circumstances, might we drop the formality? Owen is perfectly fine now.”
“Very well, Owen… I apologize. You may well think that I have a strong, proud way of voicing my opinions, and that I always have, but you are mistaken. I have always been rather…”
“Quiet? Yes, your friends’ husbands made that known to me. Your mother, too. And Helena, for that matter. I was expecting it, believe me, and you did very well, given what it must have cost you to speak up as much as you did.”
“So, you are not angry?”
“Of course not. Whyever would I be? This is not an ideal circumstance, and it would be foolish of me to demand perfection when I cannot attain it myself. Beatrice, I know that you have felt expectations that you could never quite meet, but I am not here to force them upon you. I am your husband, and I wish for you to feel comfortable in my presence.”
Beatrice thought about his words as they arrived for the breakfast. She had expected to be unable to eat at all, but as she took her seat, she discovered that she was, in fact, ravenous.
“I hope it is all to your liking,” he whispered beside her. “Knowing that your passions lie in the kitchen, I wanted to ensure that everything was to your standard.”
And it most certainly was; cold meats, whitebait, poached eggs, french bread, custard tarts, lemon puffs, and sitting in the middle of it all an enormous wedding cake. That was all alongside the fresh fruit and nuts and the tea and coffee. It was no wonder that she was so hungry.
She smiled as she bit into her ham.
“A smile!” he cheered quietly. “Does that mean you are pleased to be my wife after all?”
“It means that I am pleased to have a husband with such good taste,” she giggled.
After the wedding breakfast, her friends surrounded her at once, pulling her away from the other guests.
“What did you do?” Cecilia asked.
“I believe she means to ask you what has changed,” Dorothy said helpfully, but Cecilia shook her head.
“No, I was asking her what she did, but she is more than welcome to answer your question first, if it pleases her.”
Beatrice shuddered, wondering what her friend had heard. If Cecilia knew something, then it had to be because the knowledge was circulating, for she had very little interest in gossip.
“I was protecting a friend,” she explained simply. “That should answer both of your questions. I did not intend for all of this, but my hand was forced.”
“So, you did not intend to ruin a wedding?” Cecilia asked, and their two friends gasped.
“I ought to pay closer attention to the happenings of London,” Emma sighed. “I miss so much by hiding away.”
“I long to hide,” Beatrice countered. “I did not want any of this. All that I intended to do was protect my friend, for she was going to marry the man that is now my husband and I knew she did not want to. I was not thinking.”
Her three friends looked at her in surprise, and Beatrice could not blame them for that. She had never been one to engage in antics that could be perceived as unbecoming. But instead of making several smaller mistakes overtime, she’d made a colossal mess in one fell swoop.
“Well,” Emma said carefully, “in any case, it has served you well. Look at you! You look lovely, and now you are a wife. You know that we were all concerned about you finding the perfect husband.”
“Who is to say that he is perfect?” She sent a surreptitious glance over her shoulder at the Duke.
“He is a husband,” Cecilia said firmly. “You have protection now, and that is enough. It also means that you can leave your family home, and I shall not pretend that is a bad thing.”
Beatrice smiled in spite of herself. She did not have an ideal family life, much like her friends, and so they understood the good that came of her leaving her parents behind.
But there was sadness in the act too, for she had always hoped that she would at least come to an understanding with her family.
If that was not to be, then she was at least pleased to be leaving home in exchange for a nicer life than the one she led before.
At least, that was what she hoped.
“This is a good thing,” Dorothy said gently, squeezing her arm. “It may not feel like it yet, but this is how it was for the three of us. It may not be easy, but the joy will come. Who knows? The two of you may even fall in love.”
Beatrice thanked them, but she did not believe it.
Owen was a good man. She trusted him simply because of what he was prepared to do for Helena, but they did not love one another.
Beatrice was quite convinced that he could never love her, especially not after the trouble she had caused but also because of her mannerisms. It would be difficult for a man who knew her well to abide her quietude and reticence.
But Owen, the Duke…he did not know her at all.
She did not say that to her friends, of course. She did not wish to hear them tell her how wonderful she was because she would not believe a word of it. Pretty words were a waste of her time.
They returned to the guests, who came to her one by one to congratulate her. The only person that she was yet to see was Helena, and though Beatrice could see her speaking with other guests, Helena did not come to her of her own accord.
“Is she angry with me?” she asked Owen, who had joined her to thank their guests. “She has not said a word to me.”
“I do not believe so. Thanks to you, she does not need to marry a man she does not love. She is appreciative, I rather think.”
“If that is true, then why will she not speak to me?”
“Because you have sacrificed for her sake. She is likely ashamed. Give her time. I am certain she will want to see you.”
Beatrice hoped that he was right, and fortunately he was.
As the day continued, they exchanged short smiles, and just before they were set to leave Lady Helena came to her, asking if they could have some privacy.
A servant brought them to a room indoors at Owen’s request, and the moment the door closed behind them, Helena burst into tears.
“Oh! Oh, Helena, do not cry,” Beatrice said, panicked. “I am so sorry. I did not mean to take your husband from you, you know that. If I had known-”
“I know,” she wept. “I know, and these are not tears of sorrow. Has your husband not told you what he has done for me?”
Beatrice shook her head, her eyes wide. Helena laughed softly, wiping her eyes. Beatrice pulled out a handkerchief and offered it to Helena while her friend took deep breaths to steady herself.
“I am to leave the ton,” she explained. “His Grace has offered to send me and George to one of his homes in the North. He shall be helping with staff and other costs until George finds work and ensures that the baby is cared for. We shall not see one another again, not for a long time at least, but my future is secured and I…I will be with George…who I love dearly.”
Beatrice almost cried for her, but she maintained her composure. She did not know where her husband had found the time to make such arrangements alongside his preparations for their wedding, but she admired him greatly for it.
“Helena, that is splendid!” she gasped, followed by a small pause, and then a sigh. “What have you told your family?”
“Nothing yet. I do not know what to say. I could tell them the truth, but where will that get me? His Grace suggested that I write them a note, and tell them that I am well taken care of and that if they wish to see me, to contact him. That way, he can ensure that they truly wish to see me because they love me, and not because they want to punish me.”
“He seems to have thought of everything.”
“He truly has. He is so kind, Beatrice. He will make a most wonderful husband, and I cannot even envy you for that because my own is… Oh, I do so hope that you are able to meet my George one day!”
Beatrice looked at her friend, her eyes filled with hope and her smile bright and genuine, and prayed that everything would be as she dreamed. In following the Duke’s plan, she would leave her old life behind, and lose contact with her family, but she did not question the matter.
It was admirable, and precisely the sort of thing Beatrice would have liked to believe she would have done, if necessary, but she had not.
She was standing in a wedding gown having married a man that she was uncertain of ever loving.
He seemed kind, but anyone could be different behind closed doors, and she would soon learn if that was the case for him, for it was time for her to leave with him.
“I must go,” Beatrice sighed. “The manor is a long carriage ride away, and we wish to leave sooner rather than later.”
“Yes, I will not keep you any longer,” Helena smiled, embracing her tightly. “You are most fortunate, Beatrice. Enjoy your marriage and find something about him to love every day. Believe me, there will be something.”
“I am not so certain of that,” she replied, biting her lip.
“It is true! Every day, you will see something in your husband that you love. You simply must look for it.”
“I shall try.”
When they returned, the guests were waiting. The carriage had arrived, and it was time for her to leave. Owen offered her his arm, turning back to wave at those in attendance.
“I shall need to assist you,” he whispered. “Only this once, for they expect to see it.”
Beatrice grimaced. She knew that she was heavier than most ladies, and though Owen must have seen that, she did not want him to feel it.
Regardless, she understood that he was right.
Reluctantly, she offered him her hand and allowed him to help her into the carriage.
He followed her, and then they left for her new home.
And as the sun shone on him, she thought about how he had been respectful to both her and Helena. It was something she admired about him.
It was something, she admitted, that she could even love.