Chapter 25
VINCENT
The aftermath of Kaleb’s departure hits us all in a different manner.
Raina is upstairs in her room, and we finish packing. We agreed to leave and head back to Portland together. My stomach remains knotted as I pack the last of my computer gear into its designated insulated bag.
“She’s it for us, isn’t she?” Max asks, leaning against the window frame.
Our office looks empty with the computers off the desks and the glass doors locked over the bookshelves.
This whole place will turn into a museum for the rest of the year.
We’ll drive back now and then just to check that everything is working fine—the pipes, the heating system, the electrical system, the ventilation, and all that—before we get it back up and running for the next winter season.
Every time, it feels like we’re saying goodbye to an old friend.
“Raina?” Alex replies and zips his laptop bag shut. “Yes.”
“We’ll need to tread carefully with Kaleb, though,” Max says. “They’re tight. They’ve been through thick and thin together.”
“What are you trying to say?” I ask him.
Max nods slightly. “I think you know.”
I do. I just don’t like the prospect. “He’s her brother,” I say. “If Raina truly wants to be with us, he’ll have no choice but to respect her decision. It’s that simple.”
“He could also steer her away from us. He could convince her that what we have won’t last. And truth be told, we can’t guarantee the everlasting part either.”
“We can’t, but it’s what we want,” Alex chimes in. “It’s what she wants.”
“What Raina wants is safety,” Max reminds us. “What kind of safety have we given her, when we’re elbow-deep in a blackmail scheme, possibly at the hands of Jeremy, who’s also most likely the one who sent Kaleb over here in the first place?”
Alex shoves the laptop bag into a designated suitcase, then breathes a heavy sigh and turns around to face us. Only now do I see the doubt and concern etched deeply into his features.
“Well, fuck me sideways, Max, but it sounds to me like you’re looking for a reason to back out of this, after we just told Raina we plan to stick by her side,” he says, his tone flat.
Max scoffs. “No, that’s not what I’m saying. I’m merely pointing out our collective failure to actually protect Raina from whoever is behind the photos and the email Kaleb got.”
“Jeremy.”
“Whoever! It doesn’t even matter. We’re falling short on our promise.”
“It takes time,” I argue.
“Time we don’t really have,” Max replies.
Alex shakes his head in dismay. “Explain again how you’re not looking to back out of this, because I must be missing some key details here.”
It’s been a while since I’ve witnessed such tension among us.
For as long as I can remember, the three of us were flawlessly in sync.
It was always the three of us against the world.
Our visions matched, our principles were deeply intertwined, our minds and hearts were set in the same direction.
Even now, they’re supposed to be set in the same direction.
Raina.
Yet we seem to be at odds for the first time. I don’t like it. The discomfort we’re currently dealing with breeds distrust and doubt. Raina needs us to be unyielding, unwavering, and ever-present by her side.
“If we let other people get between us like this, we’ll fail Raina,” I cut in.
Alex and Max both look at me with furrowed brows.
“Luke is working on every possible lead,” Alex says. “Bancroft is keeping an eye on Jeremy in Portland. As long as Raina stays close, she’ll be safe.”
“And the blackmailer?” Max asks.
“We’ll keep paying the fucker until we find him and tear him apart,” Alex bluntly replies. “As for Jeremy and this stunt he likely pulled with Kaleb, he’s got his punishment coming. We just need to confirm it really is him.”
“You’ll need Kaleb’s phone or access to his email,” I say. “Right now, you’re the last person he wants to see.”
“I’ll figure it out!” Alex snaps and slaps the edge of his desk with enough strength to make the whole thing shudder.
“We’ll figure it out. We always figure it out.
” He pauses for a deep breath. “Max, Vin, come on. We made it this far. Remember what we’ve survived.
Since when do we let a pissant like Jeremy ruin our lives? ”
He’s got a point. We’re tough men. We’ve killed in order to survive.
We’ve done terrible things in service of our country, even worse things to protect one another in the midst of bloody wars on the other side of the world.
Upon our return, we swore we’d never let anything, or anyone, get between us.
“We’re building something with Raina,” Alex adds after a long, heavy pause.
“It won’t be easy, but it’s not impossible either.
Kaleb won’t disavow his sister, I’m sure of it.
He loves her and he wants to protect her.
He just needs to stew in his own juices for a few days, and then we’ll talk to him. I have faith, brothers, don’t you?”
“I’m trying really hard here,” Max replies with a bitter smile. “But after everything we’ve done, I admit… I’m not sure we deserve her. Kaleb’s right; she’s a good girl, a genuinely good girl.”
“We didn’t ruin her,” I say to him. “Forget the bedroom talk, that’s different. She performed beautifully in our kitchen. The guests were elated. The menus were stupendous. She earned her head chef’s hat at The Black Swan. And she is fucking passionate, which is what hooked us in the first place.”
“Everything we did in the privacy of Haus of Sin, we did because we wanted it,” Alex chimes in. “Because she wanted it. Because it feels right. We belong together as weird as it may sound to others, including Kaleb.”
“Then we should tell Raina that, too, again and again, until she doesn’t feel the need to be alone in her room, like she is right now.” Max sighs deeply.
Finally, the three of us head upstairs, heeding Max’s advice and eager to talk to Raina about all this.
We’ve come up with a plan to get Kaleb on board, and we want her to be on the same page, as well.
But as I push open the door to her room and find it empty, I feel the air hissing from my lungs in sudden, unbearable disappointment.
“Where the hell did she go?” Max gasps.
Alex circles around her bed a couple of times, then looks out the window with a frown. “Her car is gone.”
Downstairs, Raina’s luggage is no longer where we last saw it. She actually loaded everything in her car and drove off while we were packing. But there’s a note on the side table in the lobby with her rushed handwriting.
With trembling fingers, I pick it up and read it out loud.
“Went back to Portland. I’ll be in touch about The Black Swan. But I’m sorry, everything else has to stop. It’s too much. XO, Raina.”
It’s a punch in the gut, the worst kind. My insides are squirming and my stomach is turning inside out. My first thought is to go after her, to catch up and to stop her. But even I have to admit that this is a delicate and complicated situation. Raina needs to deal with it in her own way.
“She fucking left,” Alex says, reading the note again.
“We have work to do,” Max replies.
Alex glares at him. “What?”
“Hey, I’m all for going after her, man. But we can’t while we still have this blackmail cloud hanging over our heads.”
“No, it’s—”
“She asked for some space,” I interrupt. “We should respect her wishes.”
And it’s fucking killing me to say so.