Chapter Seven
Lucky
I know it’s better for her if I stay away. I just can’t seem to. -Lucky
She deserves candlelight for her first time. She deserves tasteful music and a suave, debonaire man who probably has a shit ton less experience than I do. I know how to get down and dirty. Romance is completely foreign to me, but I find myself wanting to try to woo Rose.
“What ya thinkin’ about so hard over there? You’re goin’ to run off all the payin’ customers with those deep thoughts.” Nitro’s lazy drawl interrupts my heavy thoughts.
“Just figurin’ out how to dazzle a woman,” I quip back. “Never really had to woo one before.” I send the tall, bearded man a cocky grin.
He chuckles. “It’s about time some woman got your boxers in a twist. What’s the problem?”
He walks over and I glance around. There’s approximately two other people in the Viper bar right now and none of them are paying attention to me.
Of course, it’s three in the afternoon so that’s understandable.
The only reason I’m here is that I needed a spot to think…
and I may have known that Nitro would be here for advice.
Nitro is a newish member of the Silver Snakes and has quickly become one of my best pals.
He’s a no-nonsense kind of guy, but he likes the ladies as much as I do.
Girls always fall for his sense of humor and the mountain man vibe he has going on.
He’s a charmer and he never seems to get close to any of ‘em.
All of us in the MC are ex-military and I get the feeling that his days in the service were just as traumatic as mine were.
No one here talks much about those days.
I lean forward, propping my elbows on the bar and shoving my beer to the side.
I make an attempt to lower my voice. “Got a girl that wants me to take her virginity. She’s…
” I glance around again, wondering to myself why the hell I care about anyone hearing, “she’s special, man.
There’s somethin’ about her, somethin’ different. ”
My heart beats a little more rapidly even as I say the words. Why the hell is Rose so different to me? Why is it that I can’t seem to get her out of my head? I can’t decide if I’ve been cursed or blessed.
He cocks his head to the side. “Somethin’ different, huh?” He shoots me a quick grin. “Like maybe she’s the one?”
I shake my head emphatically. “She deserves better than me, man. I shouldn’t be the one anyone’s lookin’ at for a future.” I think of Gabe and the last night we were out. It was my fault we were there that day. My fault that…not going there. Nope, Rose especially, deserves better than me.
His grin drops and he leans on the counter.
“Man, you shouldn’t think that way. You’re a good guy.
I’ve never known you not to drop what you’re doing to help one of us out.
You’re always the first to volunteer. Like helping out here…
you won’t take Blaze’s money, but you come in anyway.
I think you might be one of the best people I know. ”
If he only knew. Money is easy. Money is something I have plenty of.
It’s the connections I’ve found here with my MC that have become the most important in my life.
I owe these guys everything. If Silver, the president and founder of Silver Snakes, hadn’t been around right when I needed him, I hate to think what would have happened.
I would probably be dead. He saved me from some guys that were out for my ass after I banged one of their chicks.
They didn’t care that she came onto me. They didn’t care that I didn’t know she had a guy.
Silver backed me up that night and brought me back here. I never looked back.
“Whatever.” I rap my knuckles on the hard wood of the bar. “Give me some advice, man. How do I make this special for her? How do I make sure she has a good time?”
Nitro raises an eyebrow. “Well, I can’t tell you step by step.
I’m pretty sure you know the basics, dude.
But I would say just make her comfortable.
Take her somewhere nice. Give her a good memory.
That’s really all you have to do. Oh, and go slow.
I know it goes without sayin’ but just make sure you’re gentle. ”
I nod. Most of that stuff I had already thought of. “What if…what if she gets too attached? What if she starts thinking this is a forever thing?”
“Be straight with her, but try not to hurt her feelings, man. A woman’s first time should be with someone special and if she’s chosen you, that means something.
That means a lot, actually.” Nitro reaches behind him and grabs a dishcloth.
He starts wiping at the counter. “I, for one, wouldn’t mind meeting a good woman who is ready to get attached to me forever.
I would count myself a lucky man.” He sends me a curious look.
“You do realize that if she doesn’t get attached to you, she’s gonna find herself another man eventually, right?
You’re not the only guy around and if she’s half the woman you make her out to be…
” He shrugs. “It’s something you should consider.
If this girl is that special, maybe it’s not a bad idea to think of staking your claim. ”
He says the words so casually. Having Rose forever? For once, the thought of being with someone long term doesn’t make me feel like running away. The thought of her with another guy makes me want to smash something.
The real question though is, would she want me if she knew everything about me? Would she still want me if she knew I carried another man’s blood on my hands?