Chapter 21
Davina had a rule for herself never to cry around Wyatt.
In the difficult times, she would save up until he’d gone to bed or take a shower so he wouldn’t hear her sobs.
It was hard to be a single mother, though these days, she cried far less than she had when he was little, having long since accepted that Zach wasn’t coming back.
Until now.
She’d put on a happy face while they shared a cup of coffee, then he’d gone off to meet Ben and her composure crumbled. For over an hour, she let herself go, letting all her insecurities and fears for the future overwhelm her. It was freeing. It was cathartic. It was pathetic.
Every feeling she’d ever had for the man had come back full force when they made love. If anything, she was even more enamored with the man he had become than with the boy she had fallen in love with. He was fiercely strong and protective, a true warrior fighting for what was right in this world.
What woman wouldn’t melt at his feet?
She sniffed into her coffee cup, tears running freely down her cheeks.
How would she manage only seeing him once a month?
He’d been home less than a week and already she wanted more than that.
She wanted him in her bed every night, wanted to start every day by his side and end it in his arms. “I’m such a loser…
” she whined, resting her head on the table.
The sound of the front door closing had her bolting upright. “I’m home,” singsonged Wyatt from the next room.
“Shit, shit, shit,” she whispered, hastily wiping her swollen eyes and turning off the kitchen light. He pushed into the room, and she hoped she just looked like a slovenly, pajamaed freak, sipping coffee in the darkness of a cloudy day. “How was your sleepover?”
“Good.” He flipped on the light. “Why are you sitting in the dark?”
She turned her head away. “Migraine. Can you turn that off?”
“Oh, sorry.” He did as she asked, then pulled out a chair and sat down. “You okay?”
“I’ll be fine.”
“Are you crying?”
She sighed. So much for that. She considered lying but already felt bad about the migraine lie. “A little.”
“Is it Zach?”
She thought of her discussion with Zach to keep their relationship separate from Wyatt’s relationship with him. It was a fine line she needed to dance. “Sort of. It’s hard having him back here, and great all at the same time. I’m glad you finally got to meet him, though.”
“If he’s bothering you, I don’t need to have him in my life.”
“Oh, no.” She reached out and took his hand. “That wasn’t what I meant. He’s your father, and he always will be. No matter what happens between him and me, that doesn’t need to affect you.”
Wyatt pulled his hand away. “Do you still care about him?”
Emotion swamped her, and her voice cracked as she answered, “Uh-huh.”
“And does he care about you?”
She stood, turning on the coffeemaker and inserting a pod. “I don’t think we should be discussing this.”
“You’re obviously upset.”
“Yeah, well, I didn’t think you’d be back so soon, or I would have hid it better.”
Wyatt was quiet for a minute. “I’m not a little kid anymore, mom. You don’t need to cry in the shower.”
She turned to him. “You knew about that? Why didn’t you say something?”
He shrugged. “You needed someplace to cry.”
Her eyes burned. She crossed to him and pulled him in for a hug. “You have such a good heart, Wyatt. I’m sorry if sometimes I’m an emotional wreck.”
“That’s okay. I still love you.”
She kissed the top of his head. “I still love you, too. You want a cup of coffee?”
“Does it have to be decaf?”
She let him go. “I think you’re old enough to try the real thing now.” She moved back to the coffeemaker and made him a cup. When she brought it to the table, she asked, “So, what do you think of your dad?”
“I think he’s not used to having a kid.”
She laughed. “Fair enough.”
He shrugged. “I liked when he showed me how to do stuff on the computer. I think Justin and I figured out something that might help him.”
“Yeah? That’s great. I’m not sure what time he’ll be back, though.”
“I need to look at it some more before I show him.” He sipped his coffee, looking far older to her than his ten years, then stood up. “Can I bring the computer over to Justin’s?”
“Sure.”
He walked out of the room and returned with the laptop he and Zach had been working on, and she cringed. “I thought you meant your computer.”
“No, I need this one.”
She wasn’t sure that was such a good idea but remembered Zach had said Ben had everything saved on the cloud. The hopeful look on his face persuaded her. “Be careful with it. Don’t mess anything up.”
“Thanks. Bye, Mom.”
She finished her coffee, then looked down at her tattered old bathrobe. “God, I’ve got to get out of this thing.” A shower would do her good. She stood just as the doorbell rang, and she rolled her eyes. “Fabulous.”
Making her way to the door, she tightened the belt on her robe and redid her ponytail, hoping it would hide the worst of her bed head. She opened it to find an older man she didn’t recognize, with blond hair and kind blue eyes. “Can I help you?”
“Ms. Murphy?”
“Yes.”
“I’m Agent Spaulding with the DEA. I’m afraid there’s been an accident.”
“Oh, my God!”
“Ben Sato’s been injured. I’ll need you to come with me.”