Nathaniel
NATHANIEL
Dread settled into ’s stomach, twisting it and making him feel ill. For one wild moment, he considered throwing his phone into a nearby sewer and pretending he hadn’t seen the caller ID. He did not believe in coincidence and knew in his heart that his father calling him was no accident.
He answered it.
“,” his father’s voice said curtly, sounding icy.
“Father,” he replied, gripping the phone tightly.
“I received a very interesting call not too long ago,” the older man told him simply.
’s eyes flicked to the last police cruiser pulling out of the hotel parking lot. “Is that so?”
“Don’t play stupid with me, . You insult both of us with this little game. You know full well what I’m talking about,” Dane Carter growled.
sighed. “Yes, I do.”
“Explain yourself. Now.”
glanced at Tyler, who was watching him carefully. It had been a few years since he’d heard so much anger in his father’s voice. Dane Carter was a man who prided himself on his self-control and ability to remain cool under pressure. The last time he’d heard true anger in his father’s voice was when his aide had found Tyler and together.
“I was attacked,” began. “Two men attempted to take me by force.”
“Yes, I understand that much. I want to know why you were out of the house in the first place.”
took a deep breath, knowing he was walking treacherous ground. “Seeing as how I have been permitted to leave before, I saw no reason not to continue after you left.”
“Without the escort that I strictly informed you to keep with you at all times?” his father demanded. “Or even informing anyone that you were leaving?”
vaguely wondered if his father had spoken to Sonia or if he was assuming no one knew he was out. If he had spoken to her, she must have claimed she knew nothing about it. Not that blamed her. She had a family to help and a life she needed to live. If she’d played ignorant because of his decisions, he would never hold that against her. He hoped she didn’t tell the truth, no matter what happened to him.
“I…” began, wincing at Tyler’s pinched expression. “Underestimated the seriousness that you tried to convey to me, Father. For that, I can only apologize and admit that it was a mistake. One that almost cost me.”
“Cost all of us,” Dane hissed at him. “Do you think those men wanted you for no reason? Their attempt had a purpose, and it would have cost this entire family dearly.”
“And you,” said, unable to keep the bitterness from his voice.
“Yes, and myself. I told you this upcoming election season was rife with difficulty and possible danger. That’s why I hired extra security in the first place. Instead, you put everything at risk so you could go gallivanting across the city to do as you please,” Dane said, each word enunciated clearly and fiercely.
“Yes, Father,” muttered, knowing there was nothing else he could say.
“And as for the other details that I learned?—”
“Other details?”
Dane Carter’s voice grew low and dangerous. “Do you think I don’t know you were holed up in a hotel room with someone else? Their name is on the room and in the police report. Do you think I wouldn’t recognize the name?”
’s eyes widened as he stared at Tyler. “I?—”
“Don’t think we won’t discuss that little detail as soon as I am home. For the record, after this little stunt, I will be flying back shortly. I thought I could trust you to handle things properly as the adult you claim to be. But I see that was a mistake.”
“No, I?—”
“No more. I have no time, nor do I have the patience to listen to any more of your excuses. Or lies, for that matter. With the danger passed, you will return to the estate and stay there, in your quarters, until I return. Then, you and I will have a long conversation about what you will do from this point forward.”
swallowed hard. “Yes, Father.”
“You have endangered this family enough as it is and risked my chances of re-election. I will not have my son making a fool of me and this great name. Do you understand me?”
“Yes.”
“Good. Then, you will return home promptly. I don’t care how, but I will expect word within the next couple of hours that you have arrived and are waiting in your quarters.
watched Tyler’s face, wondering how much of the conversation he heard. Shame and guilt wrapped around his gut and squeezed. He had known what he was risking by flouting his father’s rules and had dragged Tyler into the whole mess.
Again.
There was only one thing he could do. As much as he wished it could be any other way, knew the only way everything would be alright was to bow his head and take the punishment. Anything else would only make his life more miserable and drag other, more innocent, and less deserving people, into his mess.
“I understand,” said softly.
“Good, see that you don’t create any further disasters on your way home,” his father said, ending the call.
slowly pulled the phone from his ear and stared at the black screen. He knew what was coming next, and as much as he dreaded what he had to do, he knew it was necessary. Tyler had already protected him. Now, it was time for to do the same in return.
“Nate?” Tyler asked softly, squeezing his hand.
shot him what he hoped was a gentle smile. “I suppose I should have known he would find out one way or another. He always does.”
“Jesus. Did he even ask if you were alright?” Tyler demanded.
He hadn’t, but hadn’t been expecting anything else. He had willingly broken the rules and deliberately tried to flout them in the worst way possible. If there had been a list of written rules, had practically ripped them up and tossed them in the fire. What was anything else in the face of his willingness to give the finger to his father’s wishes?
“I need to return home,” told him, avoiding the question.
Tyler straightened. “You’re kidding me.”
shook his head, heart sinking. “What did you expect? If my father found out about what I was doing, he was bound to bring me back. We both knew this wasn’t right.”
Tyler snorted, lip curling. “Not right. By whose standards? Yours? His?”
“There’s not much difference,” told him.
“Of course there is. If you want there to be. You don’t have to let that giant gaping asshole control your life, Nate. You’re a full-grown man.”
“Giant gaping asshole?”
“You have a better word for him?”
snorted softly. “It’s not that easy, Tyler, you know that.”
“No, I don’t, actually.”
“He’s my father.”
Tyler turned his head away, still sneering. “The only thing about him that’s fatherly is the fact that he’s biologically related. Anything else is just bullshit he heaps on you. Trust me, I know a few things about shitty fathers.”
winced. Tyler’s father had always been a sore point for him, and understandably so. Instead of sticking with his family and trying to better his life, Tyler’s father had allowed himself to spiral into a dark place. Last anyone knew, his father had ended up in prison and wasn’t getting out for several years after an armed robbery had turned bloody.
“It’s not the same,” told him.
“A shitty parent is a shitty parent. It doesn’t matter if they were abusive, got themselves thrown in prison because they’re an idiot, or because they don’t care if you’re alive or dead so long as you make sure they look good. Shitty is shitty,” Tyler insisted.
stood up, brushing Tyler’s hand off. “The point is, I have a duty to uphold to my family, and I agreed to do it. My father is doing what he feels is best to preserve the family name.”
Tyler stared at him. “You mean his name. He doesn’t give a shit about you, just himself. All the name means to him is how it can make him look good.”
“It reflects on me as well,” told him.
“Only if you let it,” Tyler retorted.
took a deep breath, trying to keep himself calm. “Look. I know this is difficult to understand.”
Tyler’s eyes flashed dangerously as he looked up. “Why? Because I’m too poor to understand?”
“I didn’t say that.”
“Then tell me what you’re saying.”
watched him, sorting through his options. He knew it was better that Tyler wasn’t involved with him anymore. There would never be any longevity to what they were, to what they might have had. Ultimately, would have been forced to walk away, and Tyler deserved better than that.
The problem was that he would never let it go. Tyler was a stubborn man, and despite all the sweetness and loyalty, he could be like a dog with a bone when he refused to let something go. As much as it pained him, if there was only one way to make Tyler let go, then would have to go with it.
set his features to neutral. “Perhaps there is something to what you said. Maybe coming from a different background means you can’t grasp what’s at stake here.”
Tyler stood up slowly. “I understand a lot here, Nate, and I understand that you’re giving in to that absolute bastard because you think you have to. And you don’t.”
pulled out his phone tapping on it. “The fact of the matter is, there was never going to be anything more between us than what might have happened tonight. Even you have to understand that.”
Tyler’s face shuttered. “You don’t...Nate, c’mon, you can’t mean that. There’s always been more than that.”
shook his head. “No, there wasn’t. There is only what you thought would happen, and I’m not responsible for what you told yourself.”
God save him, the wounded expression on Tyler’s face ripped at ’s heart. The last thing he ever wanted was to hurt him, but if that’s what it took, he would do it. Tyler deserved better than to be wrapped up in the eventual disaster that was ’s life.
“We’re worlds apart, Tyler, and always have been. This would have ended only one way. I’m sorry you can’t see that,” said, voice firm.
Hard, his voice was hard. It was sharp at the edges and bore a chill. His father would be so proud.
Tyler reached out, trying to take ’s hand. “Don’t do this, Nate. Don’t let him win.”
“There isn’t a him winning or losing. There is only reality,” said.
Relief flooded him as the app alerted him to a car nearby. The sooner he was done with this, the sooner he could retreat and not have to stare at the wounded expression on Tyler’s face.
Tyler’s eyes darted to the car, pulling up to the curb, lips thinning. “Please don’t do this, Nate. Not like this, not again.”
waited until the car had stopped, grabbing the back door handle. “It is what it is, Tyler. For what it’s worth, I’m sorry it didn’t turn out the way you envisioned, but you have to accept this. We are what we are, and there is no place for you in my life, not in the long term. There never was.”
It was the final crushing blow he needed, and he felt like his chest would rip in half as Tyler’s expression crumbled. Yanking the door open, pulled himself into the car without looking back. Looking back meant seeing everything he had done, everything he could have had, and facing it. He managed to bark out the address, keeping his eyes on his lap.
A hand slapped against the car’s window before the driver pulled off. Against his will, knowing it was a horrible idea, looked up. Tyler’s eyes were wet, swimming with unshed tears as he shouted something through the window. He couldn’t catch the words, but he heard the hurt and saw Tyler’s agony.
And he forced himself to look away.
“Go,” he told the driver.
The car pulled away, and the lurch of the vehicle tugged at the middle of his gut. For a moment, he thought he was going to have to make the man pull over so he could be sick. clutched his stomach, willing the waves of nausea away as they headed toward the intersection.
It was right. It was just. It was what he should have done from the beginning. He told himself those things as he fought the urge to look back. Tyler had been an offer of something else, a life he couldn’t have. Tyler deserved to give that sort of life, his heart, his whole being, to someone who could fully appreciate what he offered.
And that person wasn’t him.
His life was determined from the moment he was born, and it could never have anything as bright and wonderful as Tyler in it. had known that from the start, but he’d still allowed himself to get swept away by the sheer promise Tyler offered him. It had been selfish, greedy, and unfair to them both, but mostly, it had been unfair to Tyler.
And although it felt like torture, knowing he was leaving him behind to agonize over the loss, he knew it was for the best. It was the sort of critical, cold decision his father would have been proud of. It seemed almost a shame that his father would have been pissed that had ultimately done it, not for his father, not for the family name, but for Tyler.
His last little rebellion.