Chapter Six #3
“Why?” I ask as I watch him.
“There’s no sense in you being here. You were already hurt once, it could happen again.”
“I’m fine.”
“No, you’re not. I told James to find a different place for you,” Lane says, sounding exasperated. He isn’t the one that just spent hours being poked and prodded!
I frown as I watch him walk toward me. “You don’t want me here at all? I mean…I’m fine, it’s not going to happen again—”
“Please just leave, the only reason I let you stay was to fuck you.”
I’m honestly kind of surprised that his words hurt.
I’m not sure why, when I know there isn’t anything even going on between us.
“I know. I’ve never met anyone that ever likes me for who I am.
I should have known you were no different…
but I have no one else. So…I want to keep working for you…
” I swallow hard. Noticing my cheeks are wet, I angrily wipe them.
I refuse to cry about this asshole. It’s just because my head hurts, my body hurts, and I’m tired. “I’m going to lie down.”
“Felix…I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that,” he says, sounding devastated.
I ignore him as I walk over to the bed and throw the sheets back.
I slide my shoes off and crawl into the bed as I grit against the pain.
I feel like I already have bruises everywhere.
I pull the blanket up until it’s against my neck.
Exhausted, I close my eyes and wait for the pounding in my head to subside.
I mean, I know that I don’t like Lane…it’s not that I want to be here because of him. It’s the job…it’s having something to do. It’s the ability to have someone to talk to.
Suddenly the bed dips. I open my eyes and look over at Lane, who is sitting on the edge. He sets his hand down to the bed and slides it over until he’s moved up farther onto the bed. He reaches out to me, but I can tell he’s hesitant. He doesn’t know where I’m at and doesn’t want to hit me.
“Felix…I’m so sorry,” Lane says. “I’m just…frustrated and overwhelmed. You know that I didn’t mean what I said.”
“I don’t care, Lane. I know you don’t like me. It doesn’t bother me.”
“I just don’t want you to get hurt again.
They could have easily killed you instead of what they did, so when James comes tomorrow you are going to go with him.
” He lowers his hand until he gently brushes my arm, but I think he’s scared he’s going to touch somewhere I’m hurt because he pulls his hand back and sighs.
“I’m scared you’ll be hurt again and there is nothing I can do. Understand?”
“Yes.”
“Good. It’ll be fine, alright?”
“Yeah.” I’ve always been moved from one place to the next. I know how to deal with it. “You can stop trying to make me feel better now. I’m fine.”
“Felix…fuck…I’m so sorry for what I said. I didn’t mean it. I just don’t want you hurt.”
“I said I heard you!” I yell. “Leave me alone. James can come back in the morning and I can go back to wherever the fuck I want to go.”
I turn my back to him as I thank God he can’t see the tears threatening to escape my eyes. I don’t even know why they’re there. They’re stupid tears that don’t even mean anything when I don’t even care about him or any of his shit. Quickly, I blink them away.
I feel him lie down behind me and his hand bumps into my arm.
It slowly moves over my side and down my arm until he grabs my hand.
Then he pulls me toward him until my back is against his chest. He sets his face against my hair as he holds onto me.
He never says anything, but I’m almost thankful for it.
***
When I wake, it’s around six in the morning.
Which means that I have only been asleep for about an hour, if that.
I look beside me to where Lane is sleeping with the pillow over his head.
I quietly sit up and wince in pain. It crawls up and down my body as I force myself to my feet and wonder if I can even walk to the bathroom, I’m so sore.
I close the door quietly and lean against the sink for a moment to compose myself.
I grab the washrag and stick it into the sink.
I turn the water on hot until the washrag is soaked and only then do I look at myself in the mirror.
There’s dried blood on my face so I rub at the blood until it’s gone.
My shirt is stuck to my arm where I had been cut, so I pull it off and clean the blood off it.
There are already bruises forming over the side of my face as well as my stomach and abdomen.
Since I don’t have any other clothes, I put them back on and toss the rag on the counter.
I grab a card and head out the door and down to the elevator.
The trek is rough, but the more I walk, the better I feel.
The sore muscles begin to loosen up even if just a bit.
Down onto the first floor, I head out to the parking garage to where James’s car is.
I’d assumed he had stayed at the hotel as well, and my hypothesis is proven correct when I see his car.
He must have a habit of locking his keys in his car because I had noticed that he kept a spare in a magnetic box above his rear tire. I pull it out and get into the car.
From what the hotel clerk had told me I am in a town about thirty miles from Lane’s home, so I start driving.