Chapter 70
The hill leading down to the village is so steep that Ida has to hang on tightly to the stroller to stop it careering off, out of control.
It’s only a cup of coffee, she tells herself. Nothing else. She isn’t doing anything wrong by meeting up with Gustav for half an hour in a café.
Plus Alice needed some fresh air. If she just happens to sit down with a former workmate, there is no harm done.
Daniel isn’t home, he left early this morning and probably won’t be back until late this evening.
The hotel murder is taking up all his time.
It was a terrible thing, and Ida sympathizes with the relatives.
However, she recognizes the pattern. When Daniel is drawn into a major investigation, nothing else exists.
Oddly enough, she doesn’t feel remotely irritated this time—in fact it’s almost a relief that they are seeing so little of each other.
Especially when her head is full of forbidden thoughts about Gustav.
Ida takes the subway under the E14 and emerges in the square. She turns left past ?reg?rden and the old church. They have decided to meet at the bakery, which is a couple of hundred yards away.
She is there in minutes, but Alice manages to fall asleep in her stroller. Ida is pleased—it somehow feels easier to meet Gustav if she isn’t awake.
She manages to get the stroller in through the door and looks around. There are chocolate Easter bunnies lined up on the counter by the till, along with Easter eggs of different sizes. Gustav is already waiting at a corner table by the big windows.
His curly hair is hanging loose over his shoulders. He’s so cool.
And so attractive.
He is wearing his ski gear, as if he is heading for the slopes afterward—probably with a group of tourists on an Easter break, Ida guesses. She feels a sharp pang of longing. Imagine being so free that you can just take off without having to think about anything else.
Gustav’s face lights up when he sees her. He gets to his feet and comes over to help with the stroller as Ida attempts to maneuver her way between the tables.
“Is this your daughter?” he says, bending over Alice. “She’s gorgeous!”
Ida is bursting with maternal pride. Alice looks like a little doll, lying there with her rosy cheeks and long eyelashes. She is wearing a cute onesie that Grandma Elisabeth gave her for Christmas.
“She is,” Ida agrees, tucking the stroller out of the way so that Alice can go on snuffling happily in her sleep.
They each order a latte, and Ida also goes for a cheese sandwich. She didn’t have much breakfast; she was too nervous.
It’s only coffee, she tells herself for the hundredth time.
“Are you going out?” she asks with a nod to Gustav’s attire.
“Yes. I’ve got a group doing the peaks in an hour. I’m meeting them at the VM8.” He winks at her. “Want to come along?”
Ida spreads her hands apologetically. “It would be tricky with Alice.”
“I was just kidding.” Gustav laughs, showing his white teeth, then grows serious. “Those hotel murders are a terrible thing—is your partner working on the case?”
The fact that he has asked feels wrong; Ida doesn’t want to talk about that.
Or about Daniel.
“Do they have a suspect yet?” Gustav continues.
“It looks as if it’s the same killer,” Ida murmurs, hoping he will drop it.
Gustav has pushed back the sleeves of his moss-green undershirt revealing a tattoo on one forearm—strange letters that she doesn’t recognize.
“What does that say?” she asks, changing the subject.
“It’s Nepalese and it means snow. I had it done in a little place in Katmandu.”
“Wow—you’ve been to Nepal?”
“Just before the pandemic hit. Sometimes you have to get away. A group of us went traveling around Asia in the fall of 2019. We also went to Bhutan. It’s fantastic—you should go.”
Ida nods, although she knows it’s never going to happen. Gustav’s enthusiasm is infectious, and she is impressed both by his visit to the Himalayas and his tattoo.
She can’t imagine Daniel having anything written on his body. He is way too wholesome for that.
“I had to choose between that and ‘addicted to snow,’” Gustav explains. “But this feels more authentic.”
“It’s really cool,” Ida says, resisting the urge to reach out and stroke his skin.
“Great minds think alike,” he replies with a grin.
They both burst out laughing, and Ida remembers how much fun they used to have. He is almost always in a good mood, doesn’t take life too seriously. She was the same when they worked together.
He is the direct opposite of Daniel.
She pushes away thoughts of her partner, ashamed at comparing Gustav to him.
“Fantastic skiing the other day,” Gustav adds. “Amazing snow—and you’re an amazing skier.”
“Seriously—with your skills?”
Ida tries to keep her tone light, even though the tension between them is so strong she can almost touch it.
She can’t help wondering what it would be like to kiss him.
It would be so easy, it would only take a second.
They’ve already done it, long before she met Daniel—back when she could be a little bit drunk, a little bit crazy, and life was a game.
Gustav might have been interested in something more all those years ago, but Ida didn’t have time for a relationship.
What would her life look like now if she’d taken that chance?
Alice wouldn’t exist.
The thought is almost physically painful.
Ida can’t imagine life without her. She takes a bite of her sandwich to hide her confusion.
They’re just chatting over a coffee, she tells herself yet again.
Gustav will be leaving in half an hour, and she will go back to the apartment and give Alice her lunch.
This evening Daniel will come home and they will have dinner together.
Then everything will be back to normal.