Him
Ceraunophilia. Nyctophilia... Two words that should be on my bio.
I muffle a moan at the smell of the first drops of rain as the sky roars to life, flashing a bright beam of spark, momentarily lighting up the dimly lit atmosphere.
If I could, I would skip all my plans to spend the day admiring the beauty of nature in its beastly form. The sky is silent, but I can sense something special about it today. Like it is going to be the most important day of my life.
Perhaps, today will be different. And this monsoon will break with one of the most beautiful thunderstorms ever. And maybe I would die speeding in the rain – canyon carving with my baby. The black beauty I had to work my ass off in my father’s office to get my hands on.
Although, it would be cruel to call that a fair deal with the amount of data I have stolen from his systems. Just in case, for days when the asleep Sherlock Holmes finds its way back into my head. For the days when I am reminded of the child whose only mistake was setting foot inside their sick festivities.
“How much longer Bhai? We’re leaving...” Anu calls out. Thankfully, that brings me back from the depths I shouldn’t bother visiting. For the sake of my leftover sanity.
My flip flops slap against the marbled staircase as I make my way downstairs to the foyer where my sister stands, both hands on her waist, looking just like an angry little chipmunk. Mom’s carbon copy!
Her eyes widen in shock when she notices my trackpants, “God! you’re not even ready?”
“Why do want to drag me with you, little sister? Don’t you like peace around you?”
She rolls her eyes before letting out an exasperated sigh that makes me laugh. “No one’s bothering you now Bhai... Don’t think so highly of yourself.” Her judgy little eyes pointing to the fact that the most annoying girl of her class is keeping the road clear for me.
But all I see in that moment is that Anu is a living copy of our mother; everything about her a stark reminder of the one emotion that I felt when Mom was around – true joy. Maybe that’s why I feel the most at ease around her. Not to mention she’s been the only thread holding me and our father together.
I would have left a long time ago, if it were not for her sake. I mean I can’t trust Dad when it comes to his children; after all, if I were nothing more than an object to be used as a leverage, it’s not tough to understand just how long my sister would have made it without me.
“Please Bhai I don’t want to be late today. Dad won’t let me leave without you...” Her hands folded in a prayer, “Please get dressed quickly... Please.”
“Okay... But I’m not getting off the car for your friends. Not in the mood for their drama...”
Her face lights up the moment I commit to it. “You’re the best, Bhai...”
And the simple reason of making my baby sister smile is enough for me to abort my plan for the day and leave the house. However, it might also be helpful in avoiding the probability of getting stuck and suffocated with a certain grey-haired creature in the house.
EXACTLY FIFTEEN MINUTESlater, we’re making our first stop near the last corner to her school. Anu waves at some girls passing by as she gets out of the car, adjusting the straps of her bag on her back before joining some others and disappearing in the crowd.
If the traffic is bad here, it gets worse right before the gates close. Every type of honk and buzzer fill the air as a bus takes turn blocking some of the other vehicles, clogging the traffic further more than it already was.
“What is it? Why are we not moving?”
“A bus is blocking the road, Sir.” The driver answers looking out of the window.
I adjust my head to look around for any other way out... when suddenly something – rather someone grabs my attention, mesmerizing me right away.
A giggle as sweet as honey – the voice just as sweet as sin – fills my ears, shutting out any other sound; just as the rich-brown haired creature shakes her head turning to look out of the window of the bus.
It’s in that moment that I see her.
I SEE HER!
Who the fuck – is – this – masterpiece?
Enchantress...The way her smile has captured the entirety of my being, like every single cell in my body is suddenly awake and aware of her enchanting presence. Like I couldn’t take my eyes off of her even if I wanted to. Like I’m under her spell – her magic. What a sorceress!
And I know her. I must. Even if I don’t...the urge to know her is taking my breath away.
She’s smiling all the while I am making sure to memorize every millimetre of her features. And now she’s looking at my face. Her eyes groping my insides and I don’t even want her to stop. She’s tilting her head, narrowing her gaze on me. Becoming aware of my presence... I hope just as much as I am of her.
Why are you confused the sweetest thing in the world – my muffin? It’s me, your future boyfriend. Call me delusional for now but that’s only because you might not just realize it.
You will, eventually; that’s a promise!
My jaws are on the floor... because she’s beautiful, and it is an understatement.
So effortless, those locks dancing in the wind while she’s staring at me from the window seat of that bus. My heart seems to have stopped and I don’t care if anybody sees me like this, us like this, shamelessly dropping almost all blinds between us with our eyes only.
Those perfect lips on her divinely carved face looks like something straight out of a fashion magazine’s cover page. I feel crazed... craved... corroded from within. Suppressing the rise between my thighs, just thinking of all the morals that I want to bend for this girl right here – right now. Not that I am a morally bent individual anyways; but she might be the end of whatever’s left of it.
I am still stuck in trance when the traffic clears and suddenly we are moving in opposite directions. I don’t waste time panicking, or even trying to be discreet about the vileness my unwavering gaze must be exhibiting right now. Her eyes shy away; avoidance is her cue for submission.
Why didn’t you fucking wave at her, dumbass!My head screams.
Regardless, a wild grin rises on my lips in admiration of her instant resignation. But unlike her, I don’t care who sees. Or even if I look otherwise suggestive. Nothing quite matters while I have my eyes on her.
I’m going to savour every moment, every last second till I lose sight of the enchantress.
When it finally does happen, my heart aches for more, and in that moment, I realize that I’m going to make the parallel ends meet if I have to. To make sure I don’t let her slip away from my hold.
I’ll see you again tomorrow, muffin. And maybe tomorrow we’ll make some progress. Fingers crossed!
I laugh to myself, fully aware of the insanity lurking behind my twitchy eyes, engulfing me whole.
NEXT MORNING I’M UPearly, dressed and ready pacing back and forth in my room for the clock to tick to seven. As soon as it does, I rush downstairs to the garage, avoiding all the perplexed eyes behind me, and leave.
After dropping Anu to school, and making sure she sees me go, I drive back and park my bike at the corner to the first turn. All I have to do now is fold my hands, lean back and relax. And wait – for my captivator to make an appearance...
Last night I kept dreaming of meeting her. All the things I would tell her...the things I feel for her. Today might just be the day, I repeat the mantra in my head and grin unhesitatingly.
Just as I adjust my soaking shirt from sticking to my abs, a movement at the periphery catches my attention. Deep brown hair tied up, pony tail brushing over her shoulders. How good that would look wrapped around my hand.
She’s rushing, obviously bothered about being late to school. I take a mental note of the things triggering her anxiety. Its savage but might be useful later on.
What tops it is that she’s tall, about five feet six, still nearly a foot shorter than me; which would be useful if I ever plan on abducting her. A wicked smirk curls on my lips on having no control over the morally questionable thoughts arising in my head.
She notices me and startles instantly; I guess she wasn’t expecting to see me again so soon. Let alone me waiting for her, which I am almost certain, she understands. My cue to walk over and talk to her.
I get up and start in her direction but she picks up pace and almost runs into her sister, if my digging is correct. I stop in my tracks...
This is interesting!
I take a step back and watch... Watch her panic... Watch as she keeps looking over her shoulder.
Watch as she transforms from a woman to a prey. As she transforms me from human to a chaser... A predator rising in her wake.
Because her anxiety...it’s fucking adorable. The sight is by far my first experience of a chick running away from me. But then again, she’s not just some chick. She is something else.
My eyes lose sight of her as she disappears inside the front gates, getting one last glance at me. And the fact that it’s her first step towards trying to know me is a head start to my lunatic downward spiral.
Mesmerized I brush my hands through my hair and realize I am standing in the same spot. I guess I like watching her from a distance; while all she can do is let the adrenalin take over her. Although, I am hoping to see the fight mode instead of the flight, soon.
Suppressing a chuckle at the picture, my head falls back with a hand on my heart. Realization filling my insides along with passion and what not, at what I’ve just promised myself. Unwearied of consequences.
A promise that I’m hell bent to accomplish.
I am going to catch her and make her mine. However long it takes.